Are there any jokes that spoof The Analects of Confucius?

Confucius said, "Online is better than online. Isn't it a pleasure to have letters coming from afar? People don't talk and don't care, aren't they gentlemen? "

▲ Confucius said: "You can learn new things by chatting, and you can be a shrimp."

▲ Confucius said: "It is useless to talk online, and it is dangerous not to talk down."

▲ Confucius said: "Speed is more important than life and time is more important than money."

▲ Zi Gong asked: "Why is prawn called' shrimp'?" Confucius said, "You surf the Internet quickly and well, and you don't care about the internet fee. It's called' shrimp'. "

▲ Yuan Gong asked: "* * What is a good network?" Confucius said, "Those who have Yan Hui are eager to learn, and they don't talk or pour. Unfortunately, I died short-lived, my homework was too heavy, and most of my exams were high. " ( 1)

▲ Yuan Gong asked: "* * What is a good network?" Confucius said, "He who has Yan Hui has a good net. They don't eat or sleep at night. Unfortunately, the good times are not long, the speed is too slow, and the Internet access fee is expensive. " (2)

▲ Confucius said: "Hownet is not as good as good net, and good net is not as good as music net."

▲ Confucius said: "I am silent, I am not tired of chatting, I am not tired of typing, and the internet fee is for me?"

▲ Zi is in Qi Wenshao, and I don't know the taste of meat in March. He said, "I surf the Internet every day."

▲ Confucius said: "Add me a few dollars and you can register online and upgrade for free." ((* * Enjoy the software)

▲ Confucius said: "I am not born to know the Internet, and I am good at chatting and seeking OICQ."

▲ Confucius said: "Three people must have prawns online; Choose good and learn, but not good and black. "

▲ Confucius said: "Surfing is magnanimous and money is long."

▲ Zi Zaichuan said: "The deceased is like a net fee, not giving up day and night."

▲ Confucius said: "I have never seen a good net, and my lover is not bad."

▲ Confucius said: "The three armed forces can win the handsome, but the net worm can't win the speed."

▲ Confucius said: "If people are not online, they will be close."

▲ Confucius said: "Shrimp is not proud, it is called shrimp."

▲ Confucius said: "I try not to eat for a day, stay up all night and use the net; Not fast, not as good as the following. "

▲ Confucius said: "The Tao is different, so we don't interact."