Tell a few jokes or stories to coax your girlfriend.

Farmer Min was driving a donkey into town when he met a rogue and asked, Have you eaten yet? The farmer said: Eat! The rogue said: I asked the donkey! The farmer turned and slapped the donkey and said, It's dishonest to give it to Lao Zi! There are relatives in the city who left without saying goodbye!

The salesman said to a customer who was smoking? Sir, smoking is forbidden here. The customer replied? Advise that this is a cigarette bought from you. "salesman? So what? We also buy toilet paper here! "

Answer? Well, last holiday, my girlfriend and I went to the mountains for a holiday and died. "B frightened? Persuade? " Sorry to say again? Persuasion is to live a small life with your girlfriend. "

The police found that a car was about to hit every 10 meter. So, he caught up with the car and stopped? What happened to your car? "The driver is afraid? No, it's nothing, officer. I-I always burp. "

What should a host pay attention to before the game? Advise everyone to wait for me to say' start' before rushing to answer. "Then further stressed that? I advise you to wait for my' beginning' to come out and grab it! "

Mom taught Xiaoming a lesson? I advise you, this child is not sensible. Uncle is here, why do you still want to go to the zoo to see bears? "

Do you want to have good teeth? Here are three lessons for you: first, rinse your mouth after meals and brush your teeth in the morning and evening; Second, go to the hospital for a dental examination every two years; Third, mind your own business.

Slip of the tongue: Xiao Zhang said to Xiaoli with concern? Advise it to rain, don't forget to bring an umbrella, getting wet is a trivial matter, and gonorrhea will be in big trouble! "

A man was bitten by a dog. Ask a doctor for medicine at once. The doctor is getting ready to leave work, looking unhappy? Let's see what time it is. Why did you come at this time? ""sorry, I know, but dogs don't understand! "

stay at home

Cried the girl? Advise the teacher! I saw many ants in the toilet just now. "Did the English teacher ask well? What do you suggest the ants say? " The girl looked at the teacher in surprise and said? Suggest that the ant ... it didn't say anything ... "

I wonder who farted on the bus. Everyone is speculating. The conductor said: Did the farting comrade buy a ticket? As soon as the words fell, a fashionable woman really fell for it and replied loudly: I bought a ticket!

A: I found that with the increase of age, the form of queuing will be different. For example, primary school students are always in teams, while middle school students are in piles. B ask? How about persuading that college student? ""of course, a pair! "

Don't panic when you meet a dog on the road. Fight bravely. There are at most three results: first, you win, you are better than the dog; Second, if you lose, you are even worse than a dog; Third, even. You are like a dog.

I said, "You are a pig!" You said: I am a pig. "From then on, I will call you a pig. One day, you finally couldn't help shouting, "I'm not a pig! "In front of everyone.

You make clothes out of white clouds, borrow the right wings of birds, fly to me like an arrow, and tell me-this is what a bird looks like!

After a night of fighting, the wife said to her husband, "I finally understand why apes evolved to walk upright." The husband asked, "Why?"

A classmate bought a plate of "Male Mosquito Music" mosquito-repellent incense. Everyone asked, "How do you call male mosquito music?" "Female mosquitoes are smoked when they come out to suck blood, and male mosquitoes don't take the opportunity ..."

A farmer's father saw the word "net worm" in his son's letter and felt fresh. He wrote back immediately? I advise your father to only look at locusts and cabbage worms in his life and bring home a male and a female net worm, whether alive or dead. "Tell your girlfriend a joke.

Wife and husband discuss? Suggest that I put a statue of a master musician on the piano. Who do you think is the most suitable? "Husband? I advise you to choose Beethoven according to your own level. " "Why?" "Because he is deaf."

The leader of the unit made a concluding speech: the reasons for our poor work are as follows: First, we slept like a widow and there was no one on it; Second, like a prostitute, the coat is always changed; Third, just like sleeping with your wife, our own people always fuck our own people.