Joke Collection Website - Cold jokes - Nine mice are making trouble in Montenegro.
Nine mice are making trouble in Montenegro.
The same is true in Montenegro.
The north street of Heishan is a city that never sleeps. Every night, it is more bustling than during the day. Look at the prosperity of the whole street:
Ribbons cross the street like tents, and lanterns reflect the sky. Cars and BMWs are all over the street, and people with exquisite clothes are moving. Teacups play and sing like nature, and the dining room lights sway gracefully. Three religions and nine streams are very lively, and each has the ability to attract tourists. Everyone who comes here sells gold, and everyone who goes there has a good time. Humanity here is like a dream. I wonder if there is a demon god.
At the beginning of the night, the restaurant "Entertainment Palace", the landmark building of Chengbei Avenue, was brightly lit. The whole restaurant is very imposing: glazed tiles with goose yellow walls and cornice pagodas. The wind blows the silver bell Yuhuan, and the red dragon plays with beads on the top of the ridge. The corner is stable and auspicious, and unicorns are everywhere. Carving beams and painting buildings, ingenious brushwork, dragon dancing like a cloud. The flying horn hangs on the eaves with ribbons floating, and colorful lanterns are shaken in strings. The music and string dancing inside are amazing, and the appearance is almost equal to that of the Heavenly Palace. Wonderful words can't boast of luxury here, let alone express their feelings in thousands of words. This violation of macro-construction is laid openly, which shows that Jiang Hushui, North Street, is deeply mixed.
You see, it is such a magnificent illegal restaurant, not just a palace above the palace. In the sewer of its kitchen, nine mice of different colors have been drilled. In a dark corner, they all became people. But they are a group of handsome men and women who are fresh and domineering.
As the first "human" to wear a green robe, let's call him a green-haired mouse for the convenience of telling stories. The green-haired mouse made a "ha ha" to the sky and said to other mouse demons:
"Handsome brothers and sisters, the climax of our happiness is here again. Let's go, I'm full of wine and food, and I'll go to the streets to relax, raise my eyes and play with beautiful women. "
A female mouse demon on the left of the green-haired mouse said faintly, "Brother Green, isn't it enough to have Yu Mei to play with you?" Go to the street to play, too. "This female rat demon has a plump face like powder, so she named it Jade Face Rat.
The green-haired mouse smiled again: "Yumei, a perfect person like my brother, is charming, attractive and beautiful. Isn't it a bit rash for you to take it all by yourself?"
As soon as the green-haired mouse's voice fell, other mice and demons burst into laughter. On its right, the rat demon patted the rat fart and said, "The boss is absolutely right. My brother is kind-hearted, and he wants to move all the flowers! " The mouse wears a white robe and a jade belt, and is called a white-haired mouse.
"Ha ha, Bai Ge is really the intimate partner of Green Ge!" The talking rat demon is dressed in a red robe, with a shiny forehead and knife-like eyes. Give him the number of the red mouse.
The green mouse smiled proudly and said, "That's right. Bai Di's loyalty to me is beyond description. Let's just say that with Bai Di here, I turned luck into luck and I was killed. "
The words of the green-haired mouse made a black-haired mouse behind the red-haired mouse (a rat demon wearing a black robe) quickly glance at the white-haired mouse, looking straight ahead, as if unconvinced.
Just then, the rat demon wearing a red scarf said, "Brother Hong and his brothers have come from afar, and Brother Green is willing to do his best to make you eat, drink and have fun, so please." All right, let's call him Dantou Rat.
"Please please ..."
-The mouse and the monster give way to each other and move forward. Jade-faced mouse seems unhappy, and everyone else goes into the light. She pouted and stamped her feet lightly. The woman in the jade skirt saw that the jade-faced mouse didn't follow, so she came back and urged:
"Jade elder sister still ou what spirit? This is the style of social mobility. Go for a walk, follow up, let's go running with the bulls. "
Jade-faced mouse went down the slope, still unconvinced: "Cui Jie, they are all playboys."
Let's just call this "Cui Jie" Bimao Mouse. Miki Sayaka mouse laughed at Jade Mouse and said, "The boss's palace is still as stable as Mount Tai! You like it, but you are jealous. "
A rat demon in front of them listened to the two banshees "talking about jealousy" and turned to them with a smile: "Sister-in-law, whose jealousy altar has turned over?" Let's give him a name, too. Let's call him the four-eyed mouse. Because this guy has dark circles around his eyes, like a pair of panda eyes.
Jade-faced rat red cherry pursed her lips again and said angrily, "It doesn't matter who turned over the jealous jar."
After the four-eyed mouse "ha ha" smiled, it hummed inexplicably: "He who benefits from it will suffer from it. What did my sister let my brother spoil? "
While speaking, nine rats and demons took to the north street and joined the crowd. These nine mice and demons swaggered in the crowd, and the green-haired mouse in front was surrounded by several people, just like the emperor patrolling the street. When they came to the "Qiaopo City" opposite the "Entertainment Palace", they stopped.
Pointing to the gate of Qiaopo City, the green-haired mouse said to the red-haired mouse, "Brother Hong, do you think this food city is angry?" See the couplets written on both sides? "
The red-haired mouse looked at the door curiously and read: "The first couplet-seafood is the guest of the Dragon King Banquet in the East China Sea; The second couplet-delicacies are the dishes ordered by the Jade Emperor. Hengpi-Qiongjiang Yuye Brewing. Hey, this family is crazy! "
Green Mouse: "Brother Hong, I'm telling you, the food in this room is really unusual. Otherwise, someone would have broken the painted shed arch bridge in front of his house and painted it with a gold plaque. Look, all people! "
After listening to his words, the red-haired mouse felt itchy and said, "Brother Green said he was so good. Let's go in and have a good experience."
"Please."
"Please."
A group of rats and demons filed in, and when the green rat thief entered the door, his eyes lit up. He saw a handsome boy sitting at the white jade table by the door. The boy is very handsome-his lips are red, his teeth are as white as jade, his eyebrows are almond-eyed, he wears a silver robe and smiles at the spring breeze before he speaks.
The lascivious green rat demon lost his soul and went forward and touched the handsome boy's face. My mouth was salivating and I said obscene words: "handsome boy, play with my uncle and entertain the emperor into the palace." I'll pay the bill. "
The son, wrapped in white, was talking and laughing with the gray robe opposite him. Suddenly, he saw a disgusting paw sticking out of his face. He raised his hand to push away the "salty pig hand" and shouted angrily, "Get out, pervert."
The green-haired mouse stretched out his hand and was pushed away and scolded. Suddenly, he felt as if he had been rudely offended. Angrily patting the head of the silver robe, he scolded, "Smelly boy, I'm ashamed of you." Do you know who uncle is? "
"Flow sensitive, abnormal condition, bully ..."
In a rage, the silver-clad son denounced the export, and the green mouse grabbed his bun and pressed his face on the dining table. The boy in gray across the street saw his friend being bullied, jumped up and picked up a big plate and buckled it on the head of the green mouse.
The green-haired rat's head buckled, and he let go of the silver childe. The boy in gray was about to pull the boy in silver to escape, but the black hairy mouse rushed in and knocked him down with one punch, and rushed up and slammed him on the ground. Green-haired mouse, kicking the boy in gray.
The friend of Yin Yi's son was overwhelmed by himself, so he hurried to tear up two rat demons to solve his friend's encirclement. The green mouse turned around, grabbed his hair again and dragged him backward and outward. Seeing that the boy in gray was beaten by him, the black mouse stood up and chased the boy in silver. This guy is cruel. He picked up plates and stools and threw them at the white-clad son.
When the green mouse dragged the silver childe past the red mouse, the red mouse actually picked up a jar and smashed it on the back pocket of the silver childe. The silver childe collapsed to the ground, and the green mouse still dragged its long hair out.
At this time, two friends of the silver-haired boy came to save him. But the white-haired mouse stepped forward, and a hook fell on his back and immediately broke his head. Another friend quickly stepped forward and squatted down to help. As soon as Dantou Rat saw it, he took the jade-faced rat's stool and smashed the rescuer. The rescuer bowed his head and let go.
When the Dantou rat saw that the blow was invalid, he threw his fist at the rescuer, so he might as well hit the pink face of the nearby jade-faced rat. The jade-faced mouse screamed and made him realize that he had hit his family by mistake. The boss's girl can't be offended, so hurry to comfort her.
On the street at this time, a few rats and demons have fought to the death around Silver Childe. Kick their heads, hit their bodies with stools, and hit their faces with fists, as if they had an eight-generation feud with the son in silver. Bimao mouse took a white handkerchief on one side, followed by a rat demon, and cried, "Brother, wipe the blood off your face."
At this time, a strange phenomenon appeared in the name of the name. The clothes of the son wrapped in silver were torn off and turned out to be a daughter. This time, the green-haired mouse seemed even more embarrassed, and roared: "My Xtm, I was actually damaged by a woman today. Brothers, pull it up and drag it into the entertainment palace. Don't give me less for those few. "
When all the mice and demons heard the news, they seemed crazy. They caught the friend of the "silver-clad son" and pulled his chest to test it. It is indeed an honor. They all loudly report to the green mouse:
"Big brother, female, female, all female."
The green-haired mouse jumped wildly when it heard the news. When it is flustered, it shouts:
"Today is really folded, unexpectedly let a few women hang up our color. Brothers, tow away with me. If I don't kill them today, how can I be the leader of Montenegro? "
Seeing that all the women are going to be dragged by the rat demon, suddenly there is a thunderbolt:
"A group of rats and thieves are not crazy, but flying cats are heroes."
Hearing the name of the flying cat, the nine rat demons were all scared and cold. Green-haired mouse, call out:
"Brothers and sisters, the wind is tight, nonsense!"
The nine rat demons hurriedly let go of the woman, ran in one place, turned into a dark cloud and flew away. Flying cat soldiers saw the dark clouds sneer at a way:
"Rat thief, this time, you will fly to another world, and I, Flying Cat Hero, will also destroy such a vicious thief as you."
After seeing several women injured, he saved his life by losing each other's true qi, and said to all the men around him:
"Please help, escort these victims to heal. Saving people now is also saving yourself. Please, flying cat heroes. "
The flying cat warrior hit home, and people who had long been indignant rushed forward, anxious and eager to save the injured woman.
Seeing the enthusiastic help of the masses, the flying cat hero turned his head, bowed and thanked people for saying:
"I have already thanked you for your hard work here. Chasing rat thieves will bring you eternal peace. I'll go. "
The Great Xia looked up and saw Mo Yao Yun Fei pass through the Palace of the Emperor of Entertainment and jump to his feet. But when he caught up with the cloud behind the Entertainment Emperor Palace, there was no trace of the demon cloud. He stood at high altitude and looked around when all the lights in the entertainment palace suddenly went out. The Great Xia shrugged his nose and smelled the evil in the entertainment palace.
The flying cat warrior turned pale when he heard the demon, and he was confident about the entertainment palace. He secretly said to himself, "The Entertainment Palace used to be the stronghold of evil spirits. Today, I threw the net out and arrested you all. People in Heishan City still know it. "
He did as the Great Xia said, cast a net and went out to live in the Palace of Entertainment Emperor. As soon as he lifted the net and shook it off, all the monsters inside showed their true colors. There are nine rats and demons shivering, squeaking and scurrying around, trying to escape, but they can't escape from Skynet, the pocket of the flying cat warrior. The green-haired mouse was trapped in the mesh and its throat was tight. The black-haired mouse got stuck in the mesh and rolled its eyes. The other seven mice huddled up and dared not toss about any more.
Xia looked at the foul air in Skynet and loudly said to all monsters:
"You are a group of unreasonable, disturbing people's peace demon thief. Today, I, Flying Cat, don't know the seriousness of your crime. You are like birds of a feather. This is the name of death. I remember the Sanqing flame palm and let you disappear from heaven and earth. "
After the flying cat warrior finished, he threw Skynet into the air, and then a flame flew out of his hand and wrapped Skynet. A white smoke suddenly appeared in the sky net, and soon an empty net appeared. Flying Cat Warrior reached out to recall Skynet and put it in his arms. He looked down at the earth and thought:
"Black mountain demon atmospheric fluctuation is clear, let me take a closer look at where the sky is not clear? There is no room for a dark city in my eyes. "
The flying cat soldier thought about it and flew away. It took a long time for the people in the black mountain city below to recover from the shock, and they all cheered loudly in the direction of flying cat soldiers leaving.
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