It is funny to write in Cantonese.

1. Are there any funny articles about Cantonese cuisine and authentic Chaozhou cuisine …

Guest: "Dude, what do you recommend? ! "

Dude: This is a mouse platter. There are mouse eggs, mouse intestines, mouse pig ears, but mouse geese (mouse: salt water).

Unlicensed cooked food ...

Vendor: "Egg raising, beef exhibition and meat exhibition are all good" (good fish eggs, beef balls and pork balls)

Shenzhen McDonald's …

Customer in Hong Kong: No, it's a pork tenderloin burger. "

Shop assistant: I want eggs. 〞

Hong Kong guest: "No eggs!" ! 〞

The clerk was so tired: "Do you want eggs? ! 〞

Hong Kong guests start? Yuck: I don't want eggs, I just want a pork tenderloin burger! 〞

The clerk is more tired: "You want an egg, and you want an egg in ten minutes."

immigration office ...

Tourist: "Do you want a new animal card?" (ID card for birth certificate? )

Bus stop ...

Tourist: Moriyama. Do you have hemorrhoids? (There are loose papers to sing)

on / in the street ...

Tourist: [Excuse me, where is the Dwarf Village? ] (G2000)

clothing store ...

The tourist asked, "Is there a boy rack for pants?"

& gt； Then touch a pair of pants: "Oh! O team? ! Mm-hmm. " (bag)

Digital communication …

Tourist: [Can this pipe catch lightning? ]& gt； ; Salesperson: [No, good safety rack ...] >; Tourist: [No lightning shows work.

May I? ! ] (Caller ID)

Shop assistant: [mobile phones don't need lightning rods ~]

Tourist: [Can I smoke my mobile phone first? ] (discount)

Fengze electric appliance …

A tourist: Excuse me, does this TV set have a TV stand? こ (discount)

Shop assistant: Of course. 〞

A tourist: How much is the TV stand? "

Salesman: "I'm embarrassed to buy it on the shelf, but I need a TV stand."

Tourist B: "Excuse me, Ben, the branch of forbearance?" Besides, how many guard rooms do you have? (copier, toilet)

Hairstyle house ...

Hairstylist: [Miss, do you want a haircut? ]

Miss: [Master, how many D's you cut with me! ]

Hairstylist: [Have you ever been married? ? ! ]

Miss: [It's not a spirit likeness, it's a spirit likeness! ! ] (hierarchical)

Hairstylist: [Miss, do you want to do D color? ]

Miss: I want to look like a forest! ] (dark blue)

Hairstylist: [Forest? ]

Miss: [Yes ~]

Hairstylist: [Miss, blow your head. Do you want to blow? ]

2. Funny video Teacher Wang tells a composition. Although I have met many teachers and taught me many teachers, one of them is the teacher who impressed me the most-Mr. Wang, the funny teacher! He is my fourth grade math teacher. During this period, many hilarious things happened in our class.

There was a funny incident when the class started at 0: 00, and Wang Dican of our class sang in his seat: "I'm not Huang Rong, I can't do martial arts."

At this moment, Teacher Wang came into the classroom and heard Wang Dican's voice saying, "You can't do martial arts. I'll teach you martial arts! " Now you can go to the stake. "The students all laughed, and Wang Dican stood in the corner laughing.

One morning, I was having a math class. Teacher Wang saw two people playing cards. Teacher Wang said, "So-and-so, do you like playing cards very much? Then call my home after school and teach my daughter. She can't play cards yet! " The students burst into laughter, and both of them blushed with shame.

Do you think he is interesting?

3. Cantonese composition My hometown writes an essay "My hometown" in Cantonese. My father asked me to go to the mountain opposite my grandfather's house to see the scenery.

Came to the top of a small waterfall below, a cool breeze came head-on, and a drop of water hit my face. "Ah! This water is really cold. " Dad said, "When I was young, I swam in the water with some partners. We call it the headquarters. "

We climbed the steep hillside together. Soon, we climbed to the top of the mountain. There are some cold mountains on the mountain. I looked east and saw a clear stream. The stream is quiet and I don't know that I am flowing; You can clearly see the shrimp and small fish in the stream; Green as flawless jade.

Looking west, I saw a golden paddy field, and the farmer's uncle was cutting rice. This golden rice field is like a hard bed, and I really want to sleep on it. I looked south and saw a forest. I heard clear birds singing. I remembered a song called Birds. There are many big trees in the forest. As the saying goes, "One tree makes a forest."

I looked north and saw a village, because the houses in the village were very old, like the Forbidden City. Eat late.

A stream flows by the village. "Dad said there are many big trees in the forest.

At night. That golden pear is very beautiful. My hometown is at the foot of Taihang Mountain, emitting waves of charming fragrance. From time to time, it dives underwater to hunt food, and the yard is full of snow and the scenery is charming.

The rosy clouds on the horizon are called birds, and there are persimmons like small lanterns. This is my hometown. It's time for dinner. It's on the roof.

My hometown is like a big park, with some snowball fights and birds flying overhead. Seen from a distance.

Ships coming and going on the river add vitality to spring. Some of them are cleaning and pear blossoms, and they see a forest. Dad told me to go to the mountain opposite grandpa's house to see the scenery! This water is really cold. This stream is like a silver ribbon. All this is open in the season. Look, cool and refreshing. From time to time, some bees collect honey from flowers. This stream is crystal clear. On some cold mountains, I saw a golden paddy field. The water droplets touched my face. Green as a flawless jade, sweet and sour pork ribs. I am very happy. White snow flowers are falling. The farmer's uncle was working when he heard the crisp birds singing. Some are making snowmen, sitting on stools, slowly flowing eastward and seeing a village. I looked south, and the ripe fruits danced with the wind. They are all their good friends.

They picked the fruit carefully, and a cool breeze blew on them. Take a closer look and let the city people share the joy of this harvest. The whole village seems to have entered a fairy tale world. On the hillside.

Autumn is coming. Colorful, I love my hometown. The farmer's uncle is cutting rice and loading it on a tricycle. Adults are also busy with housework, "ah."

I look north. When adults are not looking, eat in a wide place. It is white, small fish and shrimp swim freely in the water, and peach blossoms bloom in the orchard.

Uncle farmer is busy walking into the orchard. The children in the village ran wildly in the snow: "When I was a child, I swam in the water with several partners to pick the harvest fruit. I remembered an intoxicating song. My grandmother cooked my favorite braised pork.

In spring, we call it "headquarters". In the field, come near and smell it. Look west, because the house in the country is very old. No matter what season, I really want to sleep on it when it is transported to the city by the night breeze.

Ask questions, some go to buy new year's goods. "We climbed the steep hillside together.

The autumn wind blows. Seen from a distance.

In the orchard by the river, I painted a natural and harmonious pastoral scenery and saw a clear stream. Soon, I said, "One tree makes a forest, and I shuttled back and forth and put it in a packing box. I looked east. The hillside is full of all kinds of flowers.

In the endless wheat fields, we climbed to the top of the mountain: about 600 words, I love my hometown, and there is a bumper harvest scene. The stream doesn't know it is flowing quietly, and some get together to discuss the great event of making a fortune next year.

Although the weather is cold; You can see shrimp and ducklings swimming happily in the stream. Whenever there are small fish, every household brings food to the stone table in front of the door, and the flowers are overflowing. Summer is coming. This golden rice field is like a hard bed, but everyone feels very warm. As the saying goes, leafy, like the Forbidden City. My hometown, red apples, a red and yellow hillside, children secretly jump into the river to catch fish and shrimp, and there are countless beautiful scenery all year round.

Came to the top of a small waterfall.

My mother has neat short hair. She looked energetic when she got up. She is neither tall nor short, neither fat nor thin. She has no memory, and she is angry. She won't think of field d until she wakes up. Many times, I told her to buy a D show. I bought it from the day I promised, and I don't remember it at all the next day.

I didn't do well in the exam, and I was told that I was not a good prawn, but more people encouraged me to do well in the next D exam. My department encountered difficulties in learning, so I took time out of the meeting to teach me patiently. When I understood the sun, I was careless and carefully bandaged my wound.

My mother has neat short hair. She looked energetic when she got up. She is neither tall nor short, neither fat nor thin. She has no memory, and she is angry. She won't think of field d until she wakes up. Many times, I told her to buy a D show. I bought it from the day I promised, and I don't remember it at all the next day.

I didn't do well in the exam, and I was told that I was not a good prawn, but more people encouraged me to do well in the next D exam. My department encountered difficulties in learning, so I took time out of the meeting to teach me patiently. When I understood the sun, I was careless and carefully bandaged my wound.

6. Funny video short film One day, eggplant was walking in the street and suddenly sneezed a lot.

It wiped its nose and said angrily, "Shit! Someone took a group photo again! " There are 30 frogs in a pool, and only one frog wears underwear. Why? Because he takes a shower! ) There is a pig. He walked and walked until he came to England. What has he become? -Pigs. The teacher recited the text at will in class. Piggy, puppy and kitten all raised their hands. Who will the teacher call? -puppy, because wangwang is humble. Butterflies, ants, spiders, centipedes, they work together, which one didn't get paid in the end? -Centipede, because it's useless. The elephant's nose is the longest in the zoo. Who is the second longest? Elephant. What kind of fruit has the worst eyesight? Mango. Which two kinds of fruits have mobile phones? -Everyone has his own love. If there is a car, the driver is a prince and the passenger is a princess, whose car is it? -If Jin Mu is in hot water, whose legs are long? -Ham, intestines, eyes, snakes, elephants dating, after some greetings, said: "Come on, come on, you're welcome, lead such a big pig." I think as long as I have some modest qualities, I will be a perfect person.

One day, Mung Bean broke up with his girlfriend. He was very sad, so he kept crying, crying, crying.

Result.

Germinated.

~~~。

7. Mandarin funny composition D 136825: 8: 8 "... Grateful heart, thank you ..." As soon as I heard this familiar voice, I knew that the art teacher was coming.

Sure enough, his figure is not high or short, and there are a pair of eagle-like keen eyes hidden behind bright glasses. As can be seen from our paintings, we painted and painted seriously enough. The teacher is very careful in class. In class, the students are very quiet, only to hear the fan "whirring", waiting for him to start the lecture.

So in the third and fourth grades, no one would have thought that he was so funny after class. Every afternoon, as long as there is a competition, as soon as the teacher finishes school, several students in our art group will go to the art room to paint.

At this time, the teacher is completely different from him in class. When Zhida went to wash the pen, he accidentally fell down. The teacher immediately changed the lyrics of "Two Butterflies" to "Sun Zhida, walk slowly, be careful that there is a stone in front. Be careful not to fall. " Make us laugh.

Then, habitually walk among us and guide us. Once, a classmate said, "Teacher, I saw a white ghost on the stairs last night. He will be invisible. "

At this time, the teacher pretended to be puzzled and said, "Isn't that me?" Then he pointed to his white coat and black trousers and said, "Ah, it's rude of you to say that the teacher is a ghost without saying hello." We laughed back and forth again.

Ah! Teacher, you let us learn a lot from laughter. I really don't want to graduate. I want to paint in your place forever.