Foreign crosstalk jokes

Yo, it's Lao Li. What have you been up to recently?

Hey, it's nothing. I haven't seen your father since I played chess. How is he?

Thanks to you, it is still strong.

Your father also likes playing chess.

B: Really?

Yes, I used to play chess with your father.

B: (whispering) Why didn't I know?

Once we played chess, I had one scholar left and your father had one elephant left. ...

B: So it's not a draw?

A: yes, I am also a chess player, but your father quit and had to keep playing?

B: Ah, how do I get off?

B: So it's not a draw?

A: yes, I am also a chess player, but your father quit and had to keep playing?

B: Ah, how do I get off?

A: Hehe, your father has an idea.

What idea?

Your father said, "Why don't we all cross the river?"

B: I have never heard of it!

A: Then your father's elephant crossed the river, and so did my taxi. Your father regards his elephant as me, and I regard my taxi as your father. . . Your father is like me, I'm like your father, your father is like me, I'm like your father, your father is like me, I'm your father, your father is like me, I'm your father, your father is like me, I'm your father, I'm your father, I'm your father, your father is like me, your father is like me, I'm your father, I'm your father, your father is like me, I'm your father, your father is like me. ...

B: Get out! ! !

Niu: Ladies and gentlemen, distinguished guests. Our company's on-site office has started now.

Feng Gong: Hey! Idea company, this is a new thing. As the name implies, ah, ah! What does your creative company do?

Niu: To put it bluntly, it means giving advice and attention to everyone. Let me introduce myself first. I am the general manager of the creative company.

Feng Gong: Manager Niu.

Niu: Mr. Lu Xun speaks highly of our old ox family.

Feng Gong: What did you say?

Cattle: Cattle, they eat grass.

Feng Gong: It's milk.

Bull: But I didn't. I eat milk.

Feng Gong: Grass is squeezed out.

Bull: It's the idea of being squeezed. People give the nickname "Idea Bull".

Feng Gong: "Idea Bull", "Idea Bull" is you! You are a big shot in today's society. Who doesn't know "idea cow"? I don't know anyway.

Niu: Look at this. You don't trust our idea company very much.

Feng Gong: Ouch! It's not that I don't believe it, I believe it.

Can't spit quickly.

Liang Yijia: When people meet fresh air, they always want to take a deep breath.

B: Get some fresh air.

A: My second uncle is not like this.

What happened to him?

I like to get it off my chest.

What are we going to talk about?

A: It has nothing to do with chatting.

B: Then how do you take it out of your chest?

A: spit out the phlegm and he will be happy.

B: What a relief!

A: He can get up early for work and pedal his bike. He can throw up all the way from home to the office.

Spit everywhere!

How do you think?

B: That's immoral!

Answer: Anyway, you can see that all cyclists walk in a straight line, except those who ride behind my second uncle, they all look like twists and turns.

B: What's the matter?

A: You don't have to ask-I'm afraid my breath will spill on my face.

This is too much! No one came out to take care of him all the way?

A: In the words of old Beijing, he is ashamed of him. In the words of people who go to work, I don't have time to care about him; In the words of sanitation workers, it is called low quality; In the words of law enforcement officers, he told me not to see him.

Didn't say he was fine.

A: It's also a coincidence. I really met that day. My second uncle was holding out his chest when someone called him, "Come down!" " "

B: This tone is hard to accept. Where's your uncle?

A: I got off the bus quietly without saying anything.

B: I don't think so either.

A: "You had a good time all the way. Can others stand it? "

B: (playing the second uncle) "I was wrong!"

A: "Just know? Are you willing to fight or be punished? "

B: (strangely) Why did you take a taxi? (Playing the second uncle) "I accept the punishment."

Answer: "Admit punishment, put this on." Say, pass me a mask.

B: "SARS is over."

A: "I am afraid that you will infect others. Also, clean up all the phlegm you spit. "

B: "I'd better admit it!" "

Answer: "Go ahead and wait until you have finished packing."

B: even fines and beatings!

A: "Besides, I can't hit you in front of so many people-wait till I get home!"

B: Do you still want to chase home? Who is it, so powerful?

Do you ask the man in charge of my second uncle?

B: Ah.

A: My grandfather!

B: That's what I'm talking about!