Complete works of cold jokes

The most important thing in life is not where he stands, but the direction he faces; In the same way, the most important thing in bed is not the position he inserted, but the direction he drew ... (kitten and puppy)

If you catch a cold and don't take medicine, it will take 7 days to get well; If you go to the hospital to see a doctor and take medicine, it will be fine in a week ... (Baiyun Yellow Crane)

Can eggs from all over the world unite to break stones? ! So be realistic ~ (Tianya Happy Paradise)

The current housing price is like Lin Chi-ling's chest-it looks firm, but it is actually full of bubbles ... (Tianya Miscellaneous Talk)

People's Daily People's Day, Sunday * People's Day * myself! (Unnamed Peking University)

I'm a university professor by day, and I'm a real beast at night! (cat flutter)

Friends are like sperm, they are abandoned in an instant for their own happiness. ...

Eat if you want, sleep if you want! Like a pig, you are in charge of your site anyway ~ (Shui Mu community)

A professor said with emotion that boys and girls in the school are not allowed to enter the dormitory of the opposite sex after 1 1: "Do people's physiological needs only attack after 1 1 at night?" (Sina)

When I was an intern at the Meteorological Observatory, I finally knew how to calculate the "30% probability of precipitation tomorrow" ~ The director found ten people in the office and asked "Raise your hand if you agree that it will rain tomorrow", and three people raised their hands ... (Egret Forest)

Li Guang shoots tigers, although the bow is strong, the stone is harder; Sister Lan is a filmmaker. She is a natural person.