Classic humorous jokes, funny stories.

Classic humorous jokes and stories are very funny.

The classic humorous joke story is funny one: snails can also have high blue sky.

1998 In the summer, Mitchell, a small town in central Oregon, USA, welcomed a China boy with yellow skin and black eyes. This is Lawrence Yu.

Michelle enjoys the warm and humid air brought by the Pacific warm current all the year round, with spring-like seasons and lush vegetation. The town is surrounded by golden beaches, dense forests, towering mountains, swift rivers, blue lakes, vast grasslands and quiet deserts, and its natural scenery is extremely beautiful. But the population of the town is only 350, with only one shop, two restaurants, a post office and a school, and there are no traffic lights on the street. This made Lawrence Yu, from the bustling city of Chengdu, feel depressed.

Lawrence Yu was really helpless when he came here. 16 years old, China failed in the college entrance examination. In order to enable him to go to college, his parents enrolled him in the graduating class of Michelle High School.

A few days after arriving at school, Lawrence Yu found that his original English foundation was far from meeting the requirements of study and life. Needless to say, it was difficult to discuss with teachers and classmates in class and communicate with the landlord.

The haze of failing in the college entrance examination has not dissipated. In addition, the environment is unfamiliar and the language is unreasonable. Lawrence Yu was as depressed as an iron. He is silent all day and can't laugh.

Constraint? Teacher Jackson teaches them physics. He is in his forties, smart and humorous, and is deeply loved by his classmates. One day, in physics class, Mr Jackson asked Lawrence Yu in class. Lawrence Yu didn't hear the question clearly, so he answered it casually, and the students burst into laughter. Lawrence Yu was ashamed. After class, he rushed out of the classroom and ran to a small forest near the school, where the grass was lush and the flowers were blooming. Lawrence Yu often sits there in a daze. He threw himself on the grass with tears all over his face.

I don't know when Mr. Jackson will sit next to him. He saw Lawrence Yu's shoulders hunched up and stroked his head affectionately. When Lawrence Yu saw Jackson, he stopped crying. Jackson pulled him up. At this moment, Lawrence Yu saw a snail at their feet. Its shell is delicate and transparent in the sun, and it crawls slowly and painfully.

Teacher Jackson asked? Do you know where the snail is going?

Lawrence Yu shook his head, and Jackson pointed to the snail and said, Look at that. ? There is a mountain ahead, with many peaks and valleys, towering into the sky.

Teacher Jackson went on to say:? I think snails will climb to the top of the mountain. There's a saying? There are two kinds of animals that can reach the top of the pyramid. Eagle and snail. ? Snails also like to choose heights! I believe that as long as it works hard, it will eventually climb to the top of the mountain, where it will see the same scenery as the eagle. ?

This sentence made Lawrence Yu deep in thought. He looked up and saw Mr Jackson's expectant eyes. He said? Thank you, teacher. I also want to be a snail climbing to the top of the mountain! ?

From the next day, Lawrence Yu actively communicated with teachers and classmates, imitating their tone and intonation. Even when no one is around, he is listening to the recording and imitating loudly. In two months, he basically mastered the pronunciation of American English and was able to attend classes easily.

In addition, his achievements have also advanced by leaps and bounds. A year later, Lawrence Yu spoke at the graduation ceremony of high school on behalf of outstanding student groups. Later, the headmaster told him privately that if he hadn't finally said a sentence in Chinese. Thank you, everyone? The headmaster almost forgot that he was a foreign student.

After graduating from college, Lawrence Yu sang all the way. With my own efforts, I transferred from a third-rate university to Harvard Business School and graduated smoothly in 2009. As a former Citibank 10? Member of the Global Leadership Program? One of the' cutting-edge talents' was hired by Lenovo Group, a fortune 500 company in the world, and became a senior assistant to the president.

The snail's sky is not necessarily gloomy. Although climbing slowly, as long as you climb towards the goal, you will climb to the top of the mountain in an unobstructed view, with an eagle-like vision and a blue sky hanging high.

Classic humorous joke story daquan funny 2: the fairy mountain begins with the Buddha's knot.

During the Wanli period of the Ming Dynasty, there was an old man in Renjiazhuang, northwest of Nanyang Prefecture. The old couple believe in Buddhism, burn incense and worship sacrifices in the morning and evening, and accumulate virtue all their lives. Maybe it's good for a good person. The old couple were extremely happy to have a son in their later years. They named their son Ren Shan, hoping that when he grew up, he would become a college father and be a good man for generations to come.

When Ren Shan was seventeen, his family suddenly suffered a disaster. At the same time, his parents were seriously ill, and all kinds of treatments failed, and they died one after another. Ren Shan only felt that the sky was falling. With the help of all his neighbors, he buried his parents in a hurry.

Lonely Ren Shan, from the east wall to the west corner watching home, is too poor to lack anything. He thought, it is said that good people are rewarded, and my family has accumulated virtue for generations. How did it end like this? Can it be said that the Buddha and immortals are asleep? Some people also say strange things: Don't look at Ren Shan's virtue. Maybe this boy did something wrong in his last life. The present has suffered retribution! Ren Shan was indignant at these strange words. He remembers that when his father was alive, he said that there was a living Buddha on Penglai Fairy Island in the East China Sea, and he knew everything in the world. Why not go to Penglai Fairy Mountain and ask the living Buddha what I have done to make my family suffer so much? Say go go, Ren Shan simply packed up and hit the road.

Ren Shan got up early and went to bed late. Dressed in the clothes of stars and the moon, he hurried to Penglai Fairy Island. On this day, he came to a roadside shop. When the shopkeeper saw him covered in dust and his shoes were tattered, he knew that he must be a guest on a long trip. Just ask the young man where to go. Ren Shan told the truth. The shopkeeper sighed and said, alas, many things in the world are really unclear, unclear! ? Then, the shopkeeper told Ren Shan that his family also believed in Buddhism and did good deeds. They only have a 28-year-old only daughter. Clever as she is, she just can't talk! He begged Shan Ren to meet the living Buddha and asked what was going on. Ren Shan readily agreed. The next morning, the shopkeeper sent Shan Ren a pair of shoes and a bag of dry food, and personally sent him on his way.

Ren Shan walked until he came to a land temple, in a former Buba village and a middle place, so he had to stay in the land temple. God of the earth already knows that Ren Shan has gone to Penglai Fairy Island to seek a living Buddha. He begged Ren Shan with a bitter face. I have pitied my old man for many years, but I have never had a chance to wait for heaven. Excuse me, what's the matter with this living Buddha? Ren quickly promised to come down.

Ren Shan bid farewell to the land god and continued on his way. A big river appeared in front of him. Ren Shan can't cross the river. He was very anxious when a big carp swam to send him across the river. Ren Shan rode on the back of carp and crossed the river smoothly. Before leaving, the big carp told Ren Shan that he had practiced in the river for thousands of years, but he could not be a fairy and a dragon. He wants to trouble Ren Shan to ask the living Buddha how he can become a dragon. Ren Shan kept nodding.

Ren Shan bid farewell to carp, climbed 749 mountains, waded 998 1 river, walked for 303 days, and finally came to Penglai Xiandao. He had no intention of watching Penglai's fairyland on earth, so he climbed up the Smoky Temple and saw the living Buddha.

The living Buddha opened his eyes slightly and said to Ren Shan. The benefactor came from afar, and the poor monk should be responsive. But according to the rules formed by this temple over the years, the donor is only allowed to ask three things at most. Please forgive me! ?

Gal Ren Shan dumbfounded. He thought of the things entrusted by the shopkeeper, the land god and the big carp, and his own business happened to be four. What should I do? When he was in a dilemma, it suddenly occurred to him that his parents had accumulated good fortune and helped others all their lives, and often selflessly entrusted themselves to save people from danger. So he gritted his teeth and bent his heart. He only asked the living Buddha three things about others, said goodbye to the living Buddha and hurried back.

Ren Shan came to the river, and the big carp swam over and asked, "Little brother, you have worked hard!" " ! Tell me how to become a dragon. Ren Shan said? The living Buddha said that if you spit out the bead in your mouth, you can become a dragon. ? The big carp is very happy. When it was carrying Ren Shan across the river, it handed the beads in its mouth to Ren Shan and said, This is a drop of water. Give it to my little brother! ? Ren Shan was about to refuse, carp? Abrupt into a dragon, shaking his head and tail and flying away.

Ren Shan went to the land temple, and the land god greeted him and asked, Young man, have you ever seen a living Buddha? What is the will of the Buddha? Ren Shan said to him: The Buddha asked you to hand over the two pots of gold and silver that you stepped on, and you can become a god! ? The face of the earth god? Swish red to the neck, hand over the gold and silver that you have been reluctant to spend for many years, and be sure to give it to Ren Shanzuo as a reward. Ren Shan refused, and the land Lord said, this is the hard-earned money of the villagers, please give it to the villagers. With that, the wind blew away and he went to heaven.

At noon that day, Ren Shan rushed to the roadside inn, and the owner warmly welcomed him. During the dinner, the shopkeeper asked shyly, My guest has worked hard all the way. I don't know what the old man asked. What did Buddha say? Ren Shan said with a smile? Buddha said, it's okay. Your girl opened her mouth when she saw her husband. ?

When the shopkeeper heard this, he was puzzled: the sky is high and the clouds are light, and the sea is vast. Who should be her daughter's husband? While speaking, Ren Shan suddenly smelled a room full of musk. When the curtain was lifted, the shopkeeper's daughter came out delicately and elegantly. What a fairy beauty! The beauty first gave a deep salute to the guest, then suddenly opened her mouth to the shopkeeper and suddenly spoke: Dad, Dad! My tongue is numb, I can talk, I can talk! ? The shopkeeper shed tears of joy. It suddenly occurred to him that Ren Shan relayed what the living Buddha said, so he had to recruit Ren Shan as his husband. Ren Shan saw that the shopkeeper was sincere and the girl was beautiful, and nodded with satisfaction. The shopkeeper quickly called out his wife and asked Ren Shan to visit his parents-in-law. Then the shopkeeper hurried to find someone to choose an auspicious day, invited relatives and friends and arranged a happy event for his daughter and son-in-law. After the marriage, Ren Shan took out the gold and silver left by the land god and gave them all to the poor villagers. Everyone praised Ren Shan as an upright and kind man.

In the summer of this year, it rained for 6,636 consecutive days, the ditch was full of rivers, the farmland was in Wang Yang, and the village was about to be submerged. Shan Ren is too anxious to eat or sleep. On this day, he vaguely dreamed that an old man with a white beard was coming towards him, and when he looked intently, it turned out to be the land Lord who had ascended to heaven! The old man of the land told Ren Shan that the whole country was flooded, and the emperor had ordered that whoever could control the flood would be appointed as the highest official of North Korea. He also told Ren Shan that it was time for North Korea to avoid the robbery. Among the immortals who make clouds and rain, there is a big Qinglong who has friendship with you, and he is waiting to repay your kindness! Said, and the land god attached to Ren Shan's ear, gave him such an explanation.

Hearing this, the Ren Shan dare not neglect. He rushed to Beijing, presented the dripping carp to the emperor, and explained that he had a way to stop the rain and the water receded. The emperor hurriedly ordered Qin to send someone to take the orb and go to water conservancy.

Shan Ren took people to the wilderness. The sky was dark and thunder rumbled. Ren Shan braved the downpour and, under the command of the land god, shouted three times into the sky. Qinglong, Qinglong, don't forget the whole world! ? Then I put the water drops into the water. Strangely, in an instant, the lightning stopped, the clouds stopped raining, a bright sun hung high in the clear sky, and the flood soon subsided.

The emperor was overjoyed. He wanted Ren Shan to be the top scholar. Ren Shan repeatedly refused, saying that he didn't want to be an official in North Korea. The emperor had no choice but to give Ren Shan countless gold and silver, but Ren Shan refused, so he had to beg the emperor to transfer these gold and silver to the victims all over the world. Impressed, the emperor inquired in detail about the origin of water droplets. Ren Shan told the emperor about his trip to Penglai to pray for Buddha. It happened that the emperor also believed in Buddhism. Deeply moved, he personally wrote a couplet for Ren Shan and sent him back to his hometown. Imperial book couplet wrote:

Doing good will not lead to good results.

You must know that there is a Buddha's fate in respecting Buddha.

When Ren Shan returned home, he framed and hung the couplets of the emperor's imperial books and meditated all day long. He thought, the world is full of red dust, where is the Buddha? Buddha is in people's hearts, and all living beings are Buddhas. To respect Buddha, we must first respect the people around us, and then respect all beings in the world! From then on, the young couple respected the old and loved the young, helped the poor and helped the poor, and did countless good things in their lives. The couple live a sweet and harmonious life. When they were 100 years old, they still looked like peach blossoms, and they couldn't see their old age at all. Later, the two went into the mountains to collect medicine and did not return. People say that they have become buddhas and immortals.

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