Two jokes expressing witty humor in language

1. I remember when I was in junior high school, during my lunch break, my buddies and I hid in the toilet and smoked. Hearing someone coming out, my friend took a sip of his cigarette and threw it away. The dean came in. He saw us leaning against the window and asked, what are you doing?

I panicked and turned to look at my buddy. I still can't forget his expression. I saw a lot of white smoke coming out of his nostrils and said:

I'm angry!

I just saw the children fighting downstairs.

Believe it or not, I hit your father.

B: No.

Then he slapped them decisively and turned away.

When my daughter left home for college, she left my beloved potted plants and goldfish for me to take care of.

But she can't rest assured, because I am famous for my carelessness as a mother.

As a result, the flowers withered I told her about it.

One day she called back, and I was too embarrassed to tell her that the goldfish had died.

She was silent for a long time, and then asked softly, So ... is Dad okay? ...