What are the collection of humorous jokes?

01

1. My friend came back from a blind date, and I said: How was it, was it successful? ?Him: ?Two out of three were successful. ?Me: ?What do you mean? ?The friend replied: ?I agreed, the introducer agreed, but the other party did not agree! ?

2. A true brother, no matter how far away we are, no matter how long we haven’t contacted you, even if we change our phone numbers several times, we can always find you when we need to borrow money.

3. I went to a friend's house to play, and his 3-year-old son happened to be on the bed, grabbing the pillow and riding him while shouting "drive." I teased him: "Handsome guy, where are you riding a horse?" ?The kid glared at me and said: ?Idiot, I was riding a pillow! ?

4. I was drinking with friends at a food stall. I suddenly remembered that my wife was still hungry at home, so I slapped myself in the face. How can I be distracted by drinking? Come on, let’s do it!

5. I stayed up late at night scrolling through my mobile phone and saw a news story about a girl who stayed up late playing with her mobile phone and became blind. After reading this news, I secretly felt lucky that I was a boy.

6. The girl at the next table suddenly ate a ring from the cake, and her cheeks turned red instantly. When my boyfriend saw me looking at him expectantly, he immediately understood, called the waiter, and said: "Waiter!" Why is there none at our table? ?

7. A classmate went to Africa to aid construction. The construction worker who first arrived at the construction site to receive him was a black man. He communicated with him in English, but the black man did not say anything. Then he spoke in French again, but the black man still didn't speak. Then he gestured with his hands. The black man finally spoke: He was making blind gestures, the whole construction site is full of Chinese people.

8. There is a colleague in the unit who is Mongolian. I went home for a year's vacation and still didn't come back after several days of vacation. My boss called me and he said on the phone: Boss, I'm still looking for a home on the Hulunbuir grassland. My family is a nomadic people. I don't know where to move now. Where did it go?

9. The child asked his mother: Why are there still flies standing on the fly sticker when there are already many flies stuck on it? Mom: If there are many people around on the street, will you go up and join in the fun?

10. Girl: Let’s break up. Boy: It’s okay to break up. Let me hold your hand for the last time. ?The girl agreed, and the boy smiled: ?If you can break free from my hands, I will agree to break up. ?The girl used a lot of strength to break free from the boy's hand. The boy immediately turned around and left. The girl suddenly understood something. When she caught up with the boy, she hit him: ?You took the opportunity to touch back the ring you gave me. ?

11. ?My friend was beaten for being a bitch. A few days later, the family of the person who hit him came over to apologize, carrying fruits and a few tortoises. When you come in, say: I'm sorry, I'm sorry, whatever. My buddy said: It's okay, just come and come. And you brought all your family members with you? As a result, I stayed in bed for two more days. ?

12. Once, a male colleague in our company quarreled with a female colleague! Suddenly the male colleague complimented the female colleague on her handsome appearance! The female colleague was overjoyed! Female colleague: ?Really? Really? How can you tell? ?Male colleague: ?My husband has no desire to see you because of your appearance, so he can only focus on his career! ?

13. I met a beautiful woman at the bus stop, and I mustered up the courage to strike up a conversation. Hello beauty, can I ask you about a place? The beauty smiled and said: Yes, you say. Please tell me how can I get into your heart? The beauty answered calmly: It's a long way. Have you seen the car on the opposite side? Don’t even think about it without a good car. I cruelly accepted this reality and drove away from the car on the opposite side.

14. One day, a ragged farmer came to withdraw money, and the bank clerk asked him to sign a note. The farmer took the note and signed it backwards. The salesperson said: "Country people are country people." You took it down. The farmer said: It was taken down. But my signature was also upside down! The salesperson opened his eyes and saw that the signature was indeed the same as the signature! His face turned red, it turned out that the farmer was a master and could actually sign in the wrong direction! The god replied: The farmer's name is King of Kings.