I can't stand a cold joke without a few clothes.

1. Just came out from a friend's house and saw that his pants were not zipped, so remind him that your door was open. He looked back at 1 and casually said: Nothing, my dad is in it!

2. A few days after school, oral ulcer. I put up with it for a few days at first, but then I couldn't eat any more. My father took me to the hospital for emergency treatment at night. When I finally spoke, the doctor shouted, "Don't look, the oral ulcer is terminal! Father's legs are weak when he hears "late stage". Then the doctor said slowly, "It's almost ready. Don't waste money. "

Snow White escaped from the palace and came to the forest. She saw a small room with seven small beds arranged inside. Snow White lay down and fell asleep. At night, the seven dwarfs came back. Snow White said, "You are the seven dwarfs I shot." The seven men looked at each other and said, "You're in the wrong place. We are cucurbits. "

4. In the cold winter, a classmate went to class in a daze. When he arrived at the door of the classroom, he felt that his scarf was going to fall, so he caught it in one hand and threw it back smartly. . . Why is it a pair of autumn trousers? What's more, this road is all around this long trousers?

An old man tripped over a pile of cow dung when he went out in winter. He thought there was someone behind him, afraid of being seen and losing face, and quickly said that youth could not catch up. Then I got up immediately, looked back, and there was no one, and then I said that this was the smell when I was young.

6. My husband came back from a business trip. Wife: You look pale and carsick? Husband: My seat is facing away from the front of the car. I'm not used to it. Wife: Why don't you change the seat opposite? Husband: The seat opposite is empty, so I can't change it!

7. A group of boys lie in the dormitory at night and talk about physiological knowledge. A boy suddenly asked: Do you think there are men with two balls in this world? !

8. I opened the college entrance examination guide and saw that there were all schools in it, and the words "excellent teachers" were written on every crooked page. I can't sleep anyway. I read it carefully in the middle of the night before I saw the words in the cracks. The book is full of the word "charge"!

9. The stationmaster of the railway station told the reporter: "Your complaint that we didn't take any measures to delay the train is groundless! Didn't you notice that we added three more benches in the waiting room? "

10. Disciple: Almighty Buddha! What is the essence of Buddhism? Tathagata: Be merciful! Disciple: What is the purpose of keeping monks in that temple? Tathagata: I'm afraid others will treat me badly!

1 1. "Hello, master, I am crowded on the bus. I want to order a song for the girl by the window in front. It's Jacky Cheung's song. You know, yes, yes, I'm always by your side. I am willing to squeeze a little. "

12. In the restaurant, a man pointed to a piece of tofu more than two meters long in the dish and shouted, "What ear are you! I ordered home-cooked tofu. " Hearing this, the chef thought, "Isn't it long enough?"

13. Wukong: "Master, this is the banana apple I stole." Pig: "Master, here are two pigs." Friar Sand: "Master, I still have cabbage here." Tang Priest: "Where is Bai?" Wukong: "Did you grab the parking space?"

14. A buddy once made an appointment with a girl he had long admired, and was ready to tell her. They sat for a long time before he got up the courage to say to the girl, "Do you have a boyfriend?" The girl replied shyly, "Not yet." He was ecstatic: "Then can you be my boyfriend?"

15. A gentleman finally became famous, so he invited a painter to his home. "I invite you to come for nothing but to draw a portrait for me. I hope you can try your best to capture my expression. " The painter stared at the gentleman's face for a while and said, "I'm sorry!" " I can't draw cartoons. ...

16. I know many friends in the entertainment circle and will go to their filming scene when I have time. Not long ago, I went to a studio, and the director was talking to the extras: There is a kissing scene behind, will you play it? The extra actors are very happy: acting. The director turned back: Tian Gong, bring the dog here!

17. The bus is very crowded, and a thin man and a fat man are standing. The thin man said, "It's not easy to wait for an empty seat." The fat man said, "You are better! Like me, I have to wait until two seats are vacant.

18. Westerners began to take tea home to eat. When they chewed it, ouch, it was terrible! ! Later, someone told them that it was just soaking and drinking. They took out a bubble and sighed, "Oh, these people really know how to live ..."

19. When a person plays the piano for others, everyone can't understand. One day, he met a woman who cried when she heard the piano. The pianist happily asked her why she was crying. She said that she thought of her dead husband. Piano player: Does your husband play the piano, too? The woman replied: My husband plays cotton ... twenty. A woman took her dog to get a haircut. She was shocked when she was told that she wanted 40 dollars. "I only need $9 for a haircut," she said contemptuously. The barber immediately said, "But you don't bite."