Funny quotes about work

Refers to a person's speech record, generally used in formal style, usually to illustrate the sentences and language features that someone said during a period of time. It now refers to new entries generated by celebrities’ words, netizens’ opinions, and social events that can arouse public excitement, be thought-provoking, and have certain communication power. Here are some funny quotes about work, please refer to them! Funny quotes about work

1. The first glass of beer after get off work will eliminate the stress of your day. A second beer after get off work to eliminate the dissatisfaction of your day. The third beer after get off work will eliminate your frustration of the day. The rest of the beer, erase the memories of your day.

2. The days of harmony and wealth have disappeared without a trace, the era of witty words has disappeared without a trace, the hard work of the hoeing day and noon, no matter how hard it is to meet, when happiness is sandwiched with blessings, in fact, it can only be Good luck with your work!

3. Time can be wasted, wages cannot be saved in pockets, happiness can be achieved by the whole family, overtime work can never be stopped, hard work is not tolerated by anyone, dare not complain for the sake of the boss, and say peace of mind in the face of work, I wish you success in your career.

4. Workplace tragedies are roughly divided into 4 levels: the first level is working overtime to make money. There is no extra pay for overtime work at the second level. The third level is to work overtime and make extra money during holidays. Level 4: No extra pay for overtime work on holidays. If you are level 4, I can teach you the ultimate trick to fire the boss!

5. I opened my eyes drowsily and found that I had to hurry up again. The night has passed, and I have to wash my face and go to work. One day, one year, one month, every minute passes by. After working hard year after year, how much money can we make? Life is not easy!

6. There is no "one gold" and no "three insurances", so you work hard and have no money; you work eight hours and work overtime without pay, and you are upset after a tiring day; you are still poor after working hard all day long. My colleagues are like tigers, and my leaders are like wolves. It’s a pity that I, a sheep, have no one to rely on.

7. Employees like to eat out at noon because that is the only time they can be picky.

8. Brother, you are the most handsome person in our state-owned enterprise workplace! Look at you: you have a face with the Chinese character for it, you speak in the Chinese language, and you sing the national anthem. When you were a boy, you were the flower of the motherland; when you grow up, you are the pillar of the motherland; sir, you are the first-class "national treasure" of the Palace Museum, hahaha!

9. Where there are lunch boxes, there is exploitation.

10. There are no stupid employees in the world, only employees who pretend to be stupid.

11. I don’t want to be a white-collar worker in my next life!

12. Talented people work hard, while untalented people pretend to work.

13. Moonlight is not a dream. You can always succeed if you don’t want to do anything. It’s not difficult to work overtime as long as your boss likes it. The bonus is a bit far away. The boss’s face can’t see through it. You can’t finish the job because you’re tired because things never get done. piece.

14. One day, the leader was having a meeting, and a colleague below was dozing off. While the leader was talking about the Three Represents, this colleague woke up. Just listen to him saying to himself: "Am I among the three representatives?"

15. Time is money, but time is not valuable at all until a person finds a job.

16. The job fair is full of mountains and seas of boxes, but the application letters are lost in the sea.

17. In modern companies, capable people do not work more but escape.

18. The myth among modern people is: Do you want to be a small clerk in a big company or a big clerk in a small company?

19. My current life is to get up, eat, catch the bus, work, work, eat, and work again, working 18 hours out of 24 hours. Can the boss increase wages? The boss said: "Okay, can you sell me the remaining 6 hours?"

20. The clock hits the same day at work...

21. "The world First” Huaxi Village, “really awesome”! Not only because they spent 3 billion to build a one-ton "Golden Bull"; not only because they spent 3 billion to build a high-rise building that "can pick up stars"; not only because of their super five-star hotel "Presidential Suite" ", and threw it away for 100,000 yuan for a night's stay. Is that because of Shenma? Xiao Fu Ze'an's bull head, his bull tail to show off his wealth, and his bullish copycat version of the shocking singing voice! I really want to go there to work, not to make money, just to "fight bullfighting"!

22. Getting rich is every office worker’s dream, and being in a daze is every office worker’s wish.

23. When you turn on the TV, you will always encounter advertisements. When you doze off, you will always encounter your supervisor. This is life.

24. After hard work, the salary is too little. I had to work overtime last night, and I looked back at my job too haggard. The flower branches in front of the window should still be there, but the color has changed. Asking you how much sorrow you can have is like stock trading with a full position in PetroChina.

25. When a person catches a cold, he can’t help himself.

26. Xiao Ming was chatting during work hours. The manager asked Xiao Ming: Should he be down-to-earth in doing things, or should he use his words? Xiao Ming said: One phone call makes the chicken fly like a chicken; one phone call makes the chicken fly like an egg; one phone call makes everything easy; manager, tell me what to do!

27. To hell with the year-end report.

28. Why doesn’t the earth take me with it when it rotates?

29. It is because everyone wants to make trouble-free money, thanks to the teacher, so making money is troublesome.

30. Behind a successful man there must be a great woman, and behind a successful boss there must be a group of poor employees.

31. The difference between the boss and the wife is that the former is easier to get rid of.

32. New rules in the workplace: You can leave early at work, get drunk immediately after get off work, your salary will increase every month, and your qualifications will increase step by step. The boss is no longer complaining, the wife is no longer worried, life is sweet, and happy times are long and joyful!

33. Life is not just addition or subtraction, salary is.

34. If you work 365 days a year, you will receive salary, bonus and overtime pay. If you don't work for 365 days a year, you will get real life or real poverty.

35. Personnel is like a flash camera, it will not flash unless you click it.

36. There are no stupid employees in the world, only employees who pretend to be stupid.

37. Working people must know that a happy life depends on creation. I wish you not to be afraid of four things at work: first, not afraid of hardship, second, not afraid of tiredness, third, not afraid of trouble, and fourth, not afraid of speculation, dare to work, dare, venture, and create.

38. When you turn on the TV, you will always encounter advertisements. When you doze off, you will always encounter your supervisor. This is life.

39. Why are you late? I'm lost on the road of life again!

40. The boss is made through hard work.

41. When employees go to work: they have to do things by themselves, and they have no right to tell the secretary to do it; when they have nothing to do, they are told by the secretary to do it; when leaders go to work: they don’t have to do anything, but they have the right to tell the secretary to do it; when there is nothing to do, they have the right to ask the secretary to do it. Its name is official. Alas, why is the gap so big? After thinking about it, having a job is not easy, it’s best to just take things as they come!

42. At a banquet, the boss’s front door zipper was unzipped but he didn’t know it. His female secretary discovered it. Due to the presence of guests, he couldn’t say it directly. He reminded the boss: “Boss, your The garage door opened. "Oh, have you seen my BMW?" The female secretary replied: "No, I only saw two broken tires." 43. I am always very cautious at work. I am outstanding and my performance has always been good. My boss praises me for my good discipline and my colleagues say that I am energetic. There is no way, we are the pillars of society!

44. A friend joked that he worked at "Samsung" company. He explained it this way: when I got up in the morning, there were stars in the sky; ...dedicate this to the tens of millions of migrant workers brothers in China.

45. Work is like a big mountain, and you and I are the same foolish old men, still working as porters; a hundred years later, the mountain will still be the same big mountain, and your and my descendants are the same foolish old men, still working as porters. Porter, a thousand years later, the mountain will still be the same mountain. ...God, I can't stand it anymore. Please help me move this mountain away.

46. Employees write diaries, and bosses write biographies.

47. If God wants to destroy a person, he will first make him an office worker, and then let his boss drive him crazy.

48. In order to live, I struggle alone; for beauty and life, I work hard; to make money, I work day and night. Life finally took a step forward, but the boss said: "Go back, the company is bankrupt."

49. One day the manager came down from the workshop and saw a man working hard, so he said to him: "Work hard, I will It was the same as you before.

The man also smiled at the manager and said, "You have to work hard too. I was just like you before." ”

50. Going to work is a blessing, and getting money is a blessing.