Make a joke about the party

Question: How to make the sparrow quiet?

Answer: Click.

Reason: Silence (silence).

One day, Xiao Fang waited at the intersection for Xiao Ye to pick him up by motorcycle.

Before long, a motorcycle stopped in front of Xiao Fang, and Xiao Fang immediately jumped into the back seat:

(slamming his helmet) "Why is it so late? It's been over 30 minutes! 」

The knight opened the helmet cover and said, "Miss, I'm here to ask for directions. Please don't hit anyone. "

I went to change my driver's license today, and the red light stopped at an intersection. As a result, a mother was holding a child, and there was a bigger one in front, which was stopped by the traffic police ... The traffic police said, "Miss, even if your child doesn't wear a helmet, why don't you wear it yourself?" This doesn't make sense! Mother said, "children can't buy such a small one!" " ! The traffic police said, "but bring it yourself!" ! "Mom said," Why should I take it? If anything happens to my child, I don't want to live! ! 」

Electrical appliances held a joke-telling contest,

It is stipulated that every electrical appliance should tell a joke.

Let all the audience laugh,

Otherwise you will be taken to Aruba. First, the washing machine,

As soon as he finished his joke, all the audience burst out laughing.

Suddenly I heard the rice cooker say, "It's so cold ~ ~ ~"

So the washing machine was taken to Aruba. Next is the smartest computer. As soon as his joke was finished, all the home appliances laughed.

I heard the rice cooker say, "It's so cold ~ ~ ~"

So! Computers were also brought to Aruba.

The third place is the most humorous desk lamp.

The desk lamp confidently finished the joke, and everyone laughed and rolled on the ground.

The rice cooker said, "It's so cold ~ ~ ~"

Just as the magic lamp was about to be taken to Aruba,

The rice cooker stood up angrily.

Turned to the refrigerator sitting behind him and said:

"I've had enough of your laughter. Don't open your mouth so wide and cold."

One day, the teacher took a group of children to the mountain to pick fruit.

He announced: "children, we can wash the fruit together after picking it, and we can eat it together after washing."

All the children went to pick fruit.

As soon as the assembly time came, all the children got together.

Teacher: "Xiaohua, what do you have?"

Xiaohua: "I am washing apples because I picked them."

Teacher: "What about you, Xiaomei?"

Xiaomei: "I'm washing tomatoes because I picked tomatoes."

Teacher: "The children are great! What about Amin? "

A-Ming: "I'm washing cloth shoes because I stepped on shit."

The complete works of outstanding problems and cold jokes that have appeared in the Xian Xian family.

The first part idiom a

0 1, a bear is coming-come prepared (bear is coming).

02, the eleventh book-incredible (book 1 1)

03. A person painted with gold-a blockbuster (a golden person)

At 04, the sheep stopped breathing-stood up straight (the sheep didn't exhale).

Don't drop your mobile phone into the toilet-it's now or never.

Xiaoyu tells Xiaoming that her father is impotent-he can't stop (Jade's father can't).

07. Dogs don't bark when crossing a wooden bridge-they never forget it.

08. Bees stop on the calendar-the sun is shining (bees and calendar).

09, two people sit on a stone-kill two birds with one stone.

10, sitting naked on a stone-throwing eggs at the stone.

1 1. A group of people smashed guns with eggs-bullet rain (egg rain under guns)

12, painters like to draw thick ropes-excellent (thick ropes are all drawn)

13, Piano under construction-Love at first sight (Piano under construction)

14, eating with chopsticks-popularization (chopsticks popularization)

15, 10 1- all done.

16, there are ten sheep, nine are squatting in the sheepfold, and one is squatting in the pigsty-cadence.

17, the sheep calls the eagle, and the eagle picks up the phone and says "hello"-Yang obeys Yin (the sheep calls and the eagle says "hello")

18, a group of women are chatting-nonsense (not chicken talk)

Part two idioms b

0 1. What kind of bat doesn't have to rest? -Sloppy (endless bats)

02. Who doesn't have a phone? -Tianyi (seamless, Tianyi has no telephone)

03. Who knows birds best? -Bow-shock (a bird frightened by a bow knows a bird frightened by a bow)

04. Why did the ancients lie on the ice for carp? -Carp ice cubes (courtesy)

05. Why does the stallion run faster than the mare? -whip the horse

06. Why is the hat turned over when it is dirty? -Zhang Guan Dai Li (wearing a dirty crown)

07. Why do newborn children die? Risk one's life

08. Why did the teacher remind us to cherish the four arrows when we were young? Time flies (four arrows = time)

09. How can flying animals not fly away? Give it a wing (it's hard to fly without wings)

10, how to make the sparrow quiet? -Press it (quiet, quiet)

1 1. What kind of snake has many mouths? -Contradictory views (snakes)

12. People who wash their faces are called washbasins. What about the people who wash their hands? -Golden basin (wash one's hands of)

13, which kind of juice tastes the worst? -Brains (rack one's brains, rack one's brains to drink)

14, what can you see on the guillotine in hell? -Covert operations

15. How to tell a delicious butcher shop from a dog meat shop? -a sheep's head will be hung at the door of the dog meat shop (selling dog meat by hanging a sheep's head)

16, why can't you see God's penis? -The secret must not be revealed (the secret)

17, which snake has the strongest vitality? -Three-inch golden tongue (snake)

18, why is it attached to the middle school? -Fetal death (secondary school attached to fetal death)

19, wife plays handstand at night, husband? -Out of reach

The third part is the problem of uneven IQ a.

0 1. How much does this star weigh? -8 grams (Starbucks, Star 8 grams)

02. What will happen after Miller of Indiana Rangers dies? -Maitreya Buddha

03. Which song's lyrics were written for CoCo Lee? The moon represents my heart (CoCo Lee, how much I love you).

04. Why don't men go out? -because out of the door became a layman.

05. What is God's vehicle? -Baby (Poké mon, Ride Baby)

06. What animal can be stuck on the wall? Stamp (posters are usually posted on the wall, so stamps can also be posted on the wall)

07. What color can best imitate? -Red (Moulin Rouge, red imitation)

08. Where is the hottest girl? -Smells everywhere (wintersweet smells everywhere, hot girls smell everywhere)

09. Which ancient man ran fastest? -Cao Cao (Speak of the devil)

10, what animal has no sense of direction? -Elk (name lost)

1 1. What is the most terrible light? Ben? Osama bin laden

12, what is a face that can poop? -Lamian Noodles

13. What is Emil Wakin Chau's favorite AV actress song-Kiss My Baby?

14, a little boy pees and plays a song title? —— Tao Zhe (Tao Zhe)