Joke Collection Website - Cold jokes - Please tell me a joke that few people know...no humor.
Please tell me a joke that few people know...no humor.
When I was young, I was dishonest about eating. In order to educate me, an old farmer said to me: It has been hard for 60 years and there is no food to eat. I never throw away the boogers I picked out
A man went to visit his grandmother with his friends. While he was talking to his grandma, his friend started eating the peanuts on the coffee table and finished them all. As they were leaving, his friend said to grandma, "Thank you for the peanuts," and grandma responded, "Oh! Yeah. ! Alas! Since I lost all my teeth, I can only suck the outer layer of chocolate.
Some people like this dish. Once, he went to a restaurant and ordered this dish, but the waiter told him that it was sold out. "Is it really sold out?" he asked disappointedly. "Sir, it is really sold out." You see, the last one was sold to the gentleman at that table. "The waiter replied. The man followed the waiter's instructions and saw a very respectable gentleman sitting next to him. The gentleman had almost eaten his meal, but the "Spicy Vermicelli Pot" was still full. The man He felt that the gentleman was wasting delicious food, so he walked up to the gentleman, pointed at the "Spicy Vermicelli Pot" and asked politely: "Sir, do you want more of this?" "The gentleman shook his head gracefully. So the man immediately sat down, picked up the spoon and wolfed it down. After a while, he was halfway through the meal. Suddenly he found a very small but full-furred one lying at the bottom of the casserole. The little mouse felt disgusted and vomited all the vermicelli he had eaten back into the casserole. When he was turning his stomach, the gentleman looked at him with sympathy and said, "It's disgusting, isn't it?" It's the same..."
On this day, the hotel owner was patrolling the lobby. A beggar came up and said, "Can I give you a toothpick, boss?" "The boss sent him away. After a while, another beggar came and asked for toothpicks. The boss thought to himself, why did the beggar ask for toothpicks instead of rice? He also sent him away, not too old, and again A beggar came. The boss said to him, "Are you here to ask for toothpicks too?" The beggar said: "Someone vomited, but I was a step too late. The two beggars in front had already eaten everything I could eat. Now only the soup is left." Can you give me a straw?
One day, three explorers finally found the "Valley of Hope". According to legend, as long as you stand on the edge of the valley and shout what you want, and then jump into the valley, you will get everything. The pit is full of what Gu wants. So the three of them decided to give it a try.
The first one was a pervert, so he shouted "Woman! Woman!" When he jumped down, there were a lot of beauties waiting for him.
The second one One is a bookworm, shouting "Books, books, books, books!" Then he jumps into the valley and gets a pit full of books.
The third is an indecisive person, always unable to think about things. After an hour of deciding on his favorite, he finally made up his mind and felt that banknotes were the most useful, so he walked towards the edge of the valley. He accidentally kicked a stone and cursed "shit!" Unexpectedly, there was a sudden change in the center. Unsteady and fell down the valley.
Once upon a time there was a little lamb. One day he went out to play and met a big bad wolf. The big bad wolf said: I will eat you! ! ! The lamb was shocked! Guess what happened? As a result, the big bad wolf ate the lamb.
The little white rabbit went out happily early in the morning, and met the big bad wolf while walking. The big bad wolf grabbed the little white rabbit and slapped it! It slapped its two big mouths. Then he said: "I told you not to wear a hat!"
The next day, the little white rabbit put on the hat and went out again. As he walked, he met the big bad wolf again, and the big bad wolf caught him again. The little white rabbit slapped it! It slapped its two big mouths: "I let you wear a hat!"
The little white rabbit couldn't stand it anymore, so he ran to the tiger and cried, saying that the big bad wolf always bullied him.
So the tiger found the big bad wolf one day and said to it: "You can't always bully the little white rabbit like this. You can change the method. For example, you ask the little white rabbit to find you a piece of meat." If he finds a thin one, say you like a fat one; if he finds a fat one, say you like a thin one; or you can ask the little white rabbit to find a female rabbit for you; if he finds a slim one, say you If you like plump ones, you can tell him that you like slim ones when he is looking for plump ones, but don’t always use the same reason.”
It happened that these words were heard by the little white rabbit outside the tiger’s house, so he I silently wrote these down.
Another morning, the little white rabbit went out happily again, and met the big bad wolf again while walking. The big bad wolf caught the little white rabbit. , said to it: "Find me a piece of meat."
The little white rabbit replied: "I don't know if you like a thinner one or a fatter one?" When the big bad wolf heard this, he was stunned. But then he thought that fortunately he was prepared. So he said: "Wait a minute, no more meat, find me a female rabbit." The little white rabbit asked again: "I don't know if you like to be slimmer." Or a plumper one?" The big bad wolf was stunned again, but after a few seconds, the big bad wolf grabbed the little white rabbit again and slapped him! He slapped him twice in the mouth, and then said: "I told you not to wear a hat! ”
The soldier asked the company commander: What should I do if I step on a landmine during combat? The company commander was very angry: Damn, what can we do? If you step on it, you will be compensated according to the price.
. Someone’s newly installed phone happened to be returned from a movie theater, so people often called to ask about the movies being screened. At first, he always explained nicely that the phone no longer belonged to the movie theater, but now It's already his, please don't call again. As time goes by, he feels annoyed, so when he receives such calls, he simply says: "You dialed the wrong number!" This also saves some saliva. One day, a familiar voice came from the other party: "Excuse me, what movie is showing now?" He said as usual: "You made the wrong number!" After a while of silence, the other party replied: "Is it a domestic film or a foreign film?
Late one night, a young woman was passing by a mental hospital when a "wow" sound came from behind. The woman turned around and saw a naked man chasing her. The woman was so frightened that she ran away. They kept chasing her. Unfortunately, there was a dead end ahead. The woman was so desperate that she knelt on the ground and cried and begged: "You can do whatever you want. I just ask you not to kill me." The man smiled slyly and said, "Really?" Then now you start chasing me. ”
Answer: A_Big Big Wolf - Intermediate Demon
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