Wouldn't it hurt too much to say anything?

It is certainly a skill to be impassioned and sharp-edged in conversation. However, if you say something inappropriate and don't choose what you say, it is also a problem. If you don't speak frankly, you will screw things up.

"Can you talk?" You must find it ridiculous to ask you this question. Who can't talk as long as they are normal people? Actually, the problem is not that simple. Everyone can speak, but some people always speak without discretion, like machine guns, sweeping everything, thinking only of their own happiness, regardless of the feelings of others.

Look at a few jokes first: a barber shop was robbed. The next day, the barber went to the client's house to shave his head, with a sad face. When the customer asked him why he was worried, the master replied, "Last night, robbers robbed me of my savings for a year. If you think about it carefully, you should only shave the robbers for the first year. " The master got angry and drove it away, and another barber changed.

The master asked, "There was a master who served you before. Why did you change to a villain? "

The host explained in detail what happened in front of him. The master nodded and said, "A barber who can't talk like this really ruined his job."

Improper use of words can also cause unhappiness to others.

Once, a person held a birthday party. At the birthday party, the guests all said the word "longevity". One person said "Longevity in Peng Zu", another said "Longevity is better than Nanshan", and another said "Happiness is like suffering".

The guest said, "This is not only unlucky, but also the word" longevity "is not the word" longevity ". We should punish three glasses of wine before making an agreement. "

After drinking the wine, the man said, "Is it fate to live a long life?"

Everyone said angrily, "birthday, birthday, how can you say such unlucky things?" The man said to himself, "Damn it, damn it."

In addition, semantic ambiguity can easily lead to misunderstanding.

Invite a guest, and three of the four guests arrive first. The man waited anxiously and said to himself, "Hey, what should come has not come yet."

A guest was very unhappy: "So, I shouldn't come?" Say goodbye and leave.

The master was anxious and said, "What should not be left is left again." Another guest was also unhappy: "Am I the one who should go and stay?" As soon as he got angry, he stood up and left.

The host said to the rest of the guests with a wry smile, "They misunderstood, but I didn't mean them ..."

The last guest thought, "It's either them or me." Before the host finished, the last guest left.

From this perspective, if we don't obey the rules when we speak, it may hurt people, make people depressed, cause misunderstanding and arouse resentment. Pay attention to the occasion, object and atmosphere when you speak, and don't just say what you want to say. For example, someone went to the vegetable market and asked the meat seller, "Master, how much is your meat?" Or the waiter in the restaurant brings a plate of sausages and says, "Sir, this is your intestines." This kind of jokes in life are all caused by the bad habit of not paying attention to speaking.

Lv Kun of Amin Dynasty believed that speaking was the first difficult thing in life. As mentioned above, it's not too difficult. As long as we pay attention to language cultivation, we will gradually overcome the defects and deficiencies in our speech. It is difficult to speak, and the most deadly thing is to tell the truth, to tell the truth.

It is difficult to speak, but you can't keep silent. It is very important to learn how to speak.

Skills need to be learned, but this does not mean that we can give up our principles and refer to deer as horses. If you speak against your will, the skill becomes evil. Cui Yongyuan put it well: "Maybe one day we will discuss skills. We already have the experience of drinking. When we proudly appreciate our skills, we find that we have lost a lot of things, and these things are very important to us. "

If you don't stick to your principles, you will lose your personality. Children will not find it difficult to say, because children are very simple and say whatever they want. Only adults think this is a difficult problem. Adults know how to look around, think about the past and think about the future, and know how to weigh and ponder. There are too many people who tell lies in life. Obviously, some people say so. I said it just now, and then I turned around and said it again. Not sincere, self-deception, so how tired and boring it is to live.

The chameleon written by Chekhov, a Russian writer, was so tired that he kept talking in his mouth. We can't do this.

So, what should we do if we really want to say something, but we don't spit it out quickly and don't know how to say it? Cui Yongyuan had an idea: Tell the truth, just as German coach schlappner said to China football players, "When you don't know where to kick the ball, kick it to the opponent's goal!"

This is the ultimate solution to the difficulty of speaking. Catering can only avoid temporary troubles and get permanent anxiety on conscience. But don't be outspoken. If it really doesn't work, you'd rather keep silent.

In addition, it is particularly important to point out that you can't speak ill of your colleagues behind their backs, even if your leader has taken the initiative to start.

One day, section chief Liu suddenly asked Xiao Liu, "What do you think of Wei?"

For a time, Xiao Liu didn't know how to respond. This is a question about character and temperament. If you answer, you are undoubtedly gossiping behind people's backs.

"No one says who is behind, and no one says who is behind." Although this statement is somewhat absolute, it also illustrates the truth that most people have talked about others more or less behind their backs, but they can't prove whether what they say is good or bad. But one thing, people who often speak ill of others behind their backs are definitely unwelcome people. Because people with a little brains will naturally think so: this time you speak ill of others in front of me, and next time you may speak ill of me in front of others. In this way, your impression in other people's minds is not much better.