Recommend a few jokes suitable for children

020 1- Is there anything in the world that carries people at a speed close to 2000 km/h without refueling or other fuels? Answer: the earth.

0202-The exam is a judgment question. Xiaohua rolls the dice to decide the answer, but there are 20 questions. Why did he throw it 40 times? Answer: He wants to check it again.

0203- A ruler with a length of 1 1 cm can be used to measure the length of any integer cm between 1 and1cm? If possible, which scales should be engraved? Answer: Yes. The scale can be located at 2, 7 and 8.

0204— Where can't you find such a cheap residence in the world? Answer: cells

0205— If a nuclear war breaks out, which two places do you think will be overcrowded? Answer: earth monkeys and heaven

0206— What wastes one third of a person's life? Answer: bed

0207— What horse can't run? Answer: Trojan horse

0208— Who is that nosy guy who walks around the street all day? Answer: traffic police

0209— Why are more and more people getting divorced? Answer: Because more and more people are getting married.

02 10— If you don't have rabies, what's the first thing you should do? Answer: Make a list of enemies.

0211-Why do some people say that the fairest thing in the world is "conscience"? Answer: Have you ever said that someone said that they have no conscience?

02 12— Do you know how long a person's calf should be? Answer: It should be long enough to touch the ground.

02 13— You have a ship with 15 crew, 60 passengers and 300 tons of cargo. Can you work out the age of the shipowner according to the above tips? Answer: Do you still need to calculate the age of the shipowner?

02 14— Xiao Wang rented a house in the urban area. The lease says that if he accidentally causes a fire and burns the house down, he must pay 3 million yuan. Xiao Wang not only didn't object, but even took the initiative to fill in an extra zero. Why? Answer: I can't afford it anyway.

02 15— You haven't spoken for a year and a half. What have you been doing these days? Answer: I was born crying.

02 16- There is an activity that can accurately tell you that beauty is not born, but expressed in various ways. What kind of activity is this? Answer: beauty pageant

0217 —— How to distinguish the southeast from the northwest? Answer: Very simple. Garton

02 18— under what circumstances, someone pushes in front of the car and then pulls, but the car will still move forward? Answer: When going downhill.

02 19— There are three children guessing, one is scissors, the other is stone, and the other is cloth. How many fingers do these three people have? Answer: sixty

0220— I often take my dog for a morning run, which makes me and him sweat profusely. Why? Answer: Have you ever seen a dog sweating?

0221-Jingjing broke the high jump record at once. How did she do it? Answer: She walked under the telephone pole.

0222— What can't you see when you hold your nose? Answer: Your own nose, of course.

0223— What can lie on a pillow every day and work for a lifetime? Answer: Railway.

0224- One thing can hold 50 kilograms of oak, but it can't hold 50 kilograms of sand. Do you know what this is? Answer: water.

0225— The bookworm bought a book and his mother found it in the washbasin the next day. Why? Answer: He thinks that book is too boring.

0226— Xiao Pang fell asleep in the taxi coming home from the library. Suddenly he woke up and found that the driver in the front seat had disappeared, but the car was still moving forward. Why? Answer: The car broke down and the driver pushed the car behind.

There are six oranges in the plastic bag. How to divide the three children, and there are two oranges in the plastic bag? Answer: Of course, one person has two oranges, but one is given to him in a plastic bag.

0228— Aunt Wang has three sons, each of whom has a sister and a younger sister. How many children does Aunt Wang have? Answer: Five.

0229— Thieves stole all the gold, silver and jewels of some wealthy families nearby. Why didn't the only rich man who didn't have anti-theft equipment or security personnel patronize? Answer: His own home.

0230-A guy was wearing a cotton-padded jacket and shorts, holding an iced coke in his left hand and hot coffee in his right. He sits by the fire every day, but the air conditioner is on. Who is he? Answer: mental derangement.

0231-Dad asked Xiaoming to recite The Analects of Confucius, and he finished the whole book in one minute. Is Xiaoming a genius? Answer: Not because he only recited the Analects of Confucius.

0232— Old Gu's family was robbed and suffered heavy losses. But when the police informed him that the case was solved, Gu sent solatium to see the thief. Why? Answer: He wants to ask the secret of how to go home in the middle of the night without waking his wife.

0233—— The monitor told the rookie that when the safety of the Grenade was pulled open, he had to count for five seconds before throwing it out. The rookie acted according to the monitor's instructions, but he was still killed. Why? Answer: Because the rookie has a stutter.

0234— What tiger is scary but doesn't eat people? Answer: Gecko

0235— The phone rang loudly, but Obana's brother didn't answer the phone. What happened? Answer: Because it is a TV advertisement.

0236— Why can't Chen quit gambling once? Answer: Because I quit my right hand and left hand.

0237— The sun is shining. Why is only Xiao Ke soaked to the skin? Answer: Because he is swimming.

0238— Nobita practiced the trick of "eating watermelon without spitting". How did he practice it? Answer: I ate seedless watermelon.

0239— What is a flower inserted in cow dung? Answer: morning glory

0240— Xiao Qin bought a brand-new sports car, but he couldn't drive on the road. Why? Answer: He bought a toy sports car.

024 1— There is no Kangxi Dictionary in the Grand Central Library. Why? A: Kangxi Dictionary was compiled by the Qing Dynasty.

0242- Teachers and priests have one thing in common. Do you know what this is? Answer: I also have the kung fu to make people sleep.

0243— Everyone used to be afraid of "mobile phones", but now they all like "mobile phones". What happened? Answer: Who doesn't like mobile phones?

0244— What is better to turn a blind eye to? Answer: photography.

0245— Grandma likes her cat very much. On the cat's birthday, she specially prepared five plates with a fish in them to congratulate her. The cat went to the plate, hesitated for a moment, and then ate the fish in the third plate. Why? Answer: I am happy.

0246— Why are there so many people in China? A: Because Han is with someone.

0247— What was the mother most worried about when her daughter first attended the dance? Answer: Dance with wolves.

0248— Every pregnant woman often imagines what her child will be like in the future. Why is May the only exception? Answer: She hasn't remembered what her father looks like.

0249— What is pigskin used for? Answer: For pork.

The fat girl of 0250- 100 kg heard that cycling can lose weight, so she tried it. Guess what the result is? Answer: thin horse 10 kg.

Brainstorm ==006

0251-Xiao Hu learned a good kung fu from The Complete Works of Martial Arts, but he was repaired the first time he saw the uneven road. Why? Answer: What he saw was piracy.

0252— Why does Xiaoming refuse to use the word "while ……" to make sentences? Answer: Didn't the teacher say "you can't do two things at once"?

0253— Under what circumstances are 24 and 44 not equal to the simplest score? A: Write it on the staff.

0254— Xiao Wu praised his girlfriend's new clothes as "beautiful" and was beaten by her girlfriend. Why? Answer: Full score 100.

0255-Mother's Day, what should you do if you don't want your mother to do the dishes herself? Answer: Tell her, "Mom, leave it till tomorrow."

0256— A vole digs a hole without leaving mud around it. Why? Answer: Because he dug the exit first.

0257— A Zhong has been married for several years and hasn't given birth yet. Why? Answer: He gave birth to twins.

0258— A lawyer, who divorced herself, stood in the wife's position and acted as her defense lawyer for free to help her ask her husband for more alimony. In the end, the lawyer lost nothing. Why? Answer: Because this lawyer is a wife.

0259— The teacher wrote a composition entitled "If I were the chairman", and all the students were absorbed in it. Why didn't Xiao Qiang do it? Answer: He is waiting for his secretary to write to him.

0260— Xiaoli only has 500 yuan on her, but after work, she went shopping with her colleagues in the department store and spent 5,000 yuan. How did she do it? Answer: He uses a credit card.

0261-What should be hidden and used secretly, and then given to others secretly after use? Answer: movies

There is a cobra in the forest, but it never bites. Do you know why? Answer: Because there is no one in that forest.

0263— Why does Lao Li like playing mahjong with his wife and children? Answer: Only in this way can we recover part of our wages.

0264— It's obviously a sugar jar, but there's a label that says "Salt". Do you know what this function is? Answer: cheat ants

0265— Why quit smoking twice? Answer: Exit the right hand or the left hand?

0266— What would you do if your son had only one right hand? Answer: What are you afraid of? Doesn't he have a left hand?

0267— What car is least prone to accidents? Answer: hearse

0268— Why are people who often put their hands into other people's bags not thieves? Answer: Customs inspector.

0269— Meiling goes out to sleepwalk every night. Why didn't her husband take her to the hospital for treatment? Answer: Every time she comes back from sleepwalking, she brings back two thousand yuan.

0270— What kind of duck eggs in the world are inedible, undercooked, but broken? Answer: the duck eggs of the competition results.

0271-Lao Wang is an alcoholic. One day he went to see a doctor, who warned him not to drink more than four glasses at a time. Why is Lao Wang still not afraid and drank eight cups in one breath? Answer: Because he saw the doctor twice in a row.

0272- There is a fertilizer plant in the north and a winery room in the south. It has one advantage. Do you know what this is? Answer: As long as you open the window, you can know what wind is.

0273— Xiao Hu's motorcycle is neither locked nor illegal, but it is still locked. Why? Answer: I wonder if that idiot locked it wrong.

0274— It is clearly a "wrong" word, why did Xiaohua say "right"? Answer: it is indeed a "wrong" word.

0275— Three people went to work in the field together, but one of them always stood there and didn't do anything. Why? Answer: That's a scarecrow.

When a foreigner asks for directions, Xiao Ming tries to speak English with him, but he doesn't understand it at all. Why? Answer: Because he is French.

0277— Holmes spent half a day, but he couldn't find any clues and witnesses at the scene of the murder, but he immediately announced the case. Why? Answer: Because the murderer turned himself in.

0278— The climate suddenly turned cold, and an ostrich decided to migrate south. Excuse me, which direction should its claws face, with its head facing south and its tail facing north? Answer: ostriches can't fly.

0279— Xiaojie likes to brag, but why does everyone say that he speaks honestly? Answer: That's what he said.

0280— The manager wanted to write a letter to his wife, so he dictated it to the female secretary to write it for him. After writing, the manager found that he had missed the last sentence: "I love you." Why? Answer: The female secretary thought it was addressed to her.

0281-There are ten suns in the sky. Why are only nine suns hit by the tail? Answer: He doesn't want to go home in the dark.

0282— When will we become arrogant? Answer: We walked alone in the cemetery in the middle of the night.

0283— Who shook his head for more than half an hour? Answer: Watch the ball game.

0284— Test the address of relatives. If your great grandfather's son is the one who married your mother, what should you call him? Answer: Have you been eaten by your son?

0285— Why did Chang 'e regret going to Guanghan Palace? Answer: Because there are no moon cakes on the moon.

0286— When people are doing something, they'd better close their eyes. Answer: you don't have to worry when you die.

0287— Except the driver, who can take the bus every day without paying? Answer: Conductor

0288— When I went through the exit formalities at the airport, I remembered that I forgot to bring my passport. How can I get my passport in the shortest time? Answer: You can get it by opening your wallet.

0289— What is the most important thing for a person who intends to leave his hair to his waist? Answer: Don't go out for nothing at night.

0290— Why do people say "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder"? Answer: Because love makes people blind.

0291-Superman saw someone robbing a bank, why didn't he stop it? Answer: I can't find a telephone booth.

0292— Where is the higher the price of goods, the happier the guests are? Answer: Pawnshop.

0293— Cars should drive on the right. Why does Mr. Yang drive on the left but it's okay? Answer: Because he drives in a country that drives on the left.

0294— Mr. Chen keeps his eyes closed at work and never opens them. What does he do? Answer: pretend to be blind.

0295— Why didn't Mr. Wu turn on the switch light without power failure or power jump? Answer: He connected the TV switch, of course it won't turn on.

0296— I stayed for a day to write a composition and found that I couldn't write the word "stupid", so he looked it up in the dictionary, but I couldn't find the word. Why? Answer: She is stupid enough to look up the English dictionary.

0297— Annie's doctor boyfriend is away on business for a year, and writes a love letter to Annie every two days. How many love letters will Anne receive in two months? A: No, there is, but he is too lazy to send it.

0298— Sam passed away. Why did heavy hair confidently say, "It's not me, there must be someone else!" Answer: Because A San is from the TV Reasoning Theater.

0299— Why did a junior high school girl faint in a haunted toilet? Answer: He forgot that the toilet door was pulled, but he couldn't push it open for a long time and fainted.

0300-Someone fired five shots at the gun target, and * * * got a hundred points. Where did he hit? Answer: Only one shot is exactly one hundred.