After giving birth, I always feel wronged and want to cry. Am I mentally ill?

It will pass. In fact, the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law kept a moderate distance at first, and there was generally no big contradiction. It all started after giving birth. A roof, the contradiction increases sharply.

Many women have a history of blood and tears after giving birth, and it is not easy to walk all the way.

Women's postpartum mood is easy to change.

The reason for this is the following：

First, the changes of postpartum hormones. After the initial excitement, it will gradually turn into depression, sensitivity, irritability and sadness.

Second, the change of the matrix. For example, cesarean section is worried about scars, and it is inconvenient to move. There may be swelling, urine leakage and even sudden hemorrhoids in a certain part during childbirth. No matter which mode of production, it is inevitable to lose your hair in the early postpartum period.

These women can't adapt and accept, so they feel sad.

Third, if the child doesn't sleep, the mother can't guarantee enough sleep. In fact, even healthy normal people will be emotional after being woken up many times in the middle of the night every day, let alone a weak woman who has just given birth.

Fourth, family relationships suddenly become complicated. In the past, the young couple were at home. Because they love each other, there are few contradictions. They are a family. But with children, there must be someone at home to help take care of the mother and newborn. This has to be mixed with more people.

Take the mother-in-law as an example. Mother-in-law will think that she suffered so much when she was young, and they will serve her daughter-in-law unevenly. If the son is too kind to his daughter-in-law, she will feel that her hard-earned son has been raised for nothing; Daughter-in-law is sensitive, and the next month is easy to be sad. My mother-in-law will think that you are still innocent when I wait on you, and I still don't like to wait on you. Moreover, she and her son are a family and often treat their daughter-in-law as an outsider.

I'm talking about the gender of the contradictory family between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law A family without contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is incomparable. I don't think all mothers-in-law are like this, but there are undeniable many such mothers-in-law

Fifth, the relationship between husband and wife began to be bad. Because of her mother-in-law's participation, her husband will become more and more indifferent to her family. No matter how old he is in front of his mother, he still feels that two women can't take care of one child. But the parturient is embarrassed to ask her mother-in-law to help, and hopes her husband will take care of her. So when a person looks forward to hiding, pregnant women will become anxious.

In fact, there are very few women who haven't cried during their confinement. Let's be normal. Everything will pass.

Give you some advice:

First, try to avoid sharing a roof with your mother-in-law. If you have to go to work after maternity leave in the future, please ask the nanny not to worry. If you must bring your mother-in-law, you can consider renting a house for her nearby. After six years of postpartum depression, I bought a house for my mother-in-law and solved this problem.

Second, if you have any dissatisfaction, don't hold it back. Say it, try to control your emotions and say yes. Otherwise, no one knows why you are angry. If you are angry, they will still find you difficult to get along with, and then they don't know where to improve, and the same problem will appear in the future. The worst result is that people may think you are easy to bully and you will bully again next time. So, don't hold back, be sure to say it.

Third, I believe all this will pass. When you don't adapt, neither does your husband and mother-in-law. Everyone must try to adapt to this new role.

Fourth, when you feel better, tidy up your room and find a sense of control over your home. My postpartum depression lasted for six years, and my self-salvation began with sorting out. Including tidying up the room, tidying up the office, and tidying up relationships that you don't like. Away from people and things you don't like, life is much simpler and happier.

Fifth, stay single. After experiencing the initial discomfort after childbirth, cultivate your own singles. After going through some pain, I decided to be independent. I learned all the skills needed for an independent life, such as driving, cooking and so on. Even the sewer pipe is broken. I changed it myself. After that, you still have to work and have the capital to settle down. So you won't be afraid or worried about who will leave you.

Come on, I wish you happiness!

Hello, I'm Ma Bao Nian, and I'm glad to answer your questions. First of all, Ma Bao should not blame himself. It's not a psychological problem, it's that you lack love too much. At that time, it meant that in the second month after delivery, Ma Bao's hormones dropped sharply, and the newborn baby needed nursing. At this time, Mabao really needs the care of her husband and family, which is very important to Mabao. Let me share my experience with you:

I am not picky about food. Growing up, I was never picky about food. But my mother-in-law always asks me when cooking. I can eat anything, as long as it is light, so eating is not a problem. My mother and father are taking care of the children, and the children sleep with us at night. Dad is changing their diapers, soaking milk powder, feeding them and putting them to sleep. I just do what I want to do. Read books, listen to cross talk, Doby children, sleep and rest, stretch their muscles and bask in the sun. ...

I'm Ma Bao in 2008. Welcome to pay attention to "Nianbao" and exchange parenting experience together. Hey, it's a long story in the middle of the month!

My mother-in-law didn't ask during pregnancy, and I didn't feel wronged. On the contrary, I felt very relaxed and never thought that I would be dissatisfied with my mother-in-law. How to say a month should not cause any contradiction, but it turns out that my idea is too simple.

My mother-in-law came when I was 38 weeks old and gave birth ten days later. After she came, she began to eat leftovers from my birthday (she occasionally cooked new dishes for her to eat, which means people had to help themselves when they didn't eat at two o'clock in the afternoon). In the morning, she fried porridge and vegetables all day, and the dishes will not be ready until her son comes back from work. During that time, I didn't have any complaints. After all, I am too old to cook by myself. Someone can cook and eat.

I have no problem with her at this time. It was the day I went to the hospital that made me dissatisfied with her.

16 went for a prenatal examination. Although the contractions are not intense, they are regular. I feel that I am going to give birth in these two days. When I come back at night, my contractions are obvious. Tell my husband, but I didn't go to the hospital quickly. 17 in the morning, my husband told his mother that I had a stomachache and was afraid of giving birth soon.

Then Sao surgery came, and she began to feel all kinds of discomfort. One day 17, she didn't say that she was going to see a doctor and take medicine. When I packed my things and went to the hospital, she asked my husband to take her to see a doctor and take medicine. I was very wronged at that time.

I deal with her affairs. Went to the hospital at night 10. The doctor checked that the cervix was gone and prepared to open the cervix. By 2 am, the baby was born. 19 She didn't come once when she was discharged from the hospital. Even when she was discharged from the hospital, I was still holding the baby (tearing+side cutting, sour and refreshing). Honey, get something. It's raining. When she got home, she was not at home. My husband didn't answer her phone. When she came back, she said to wait for us at the intersection. My husband complained, and my dissatisfaction can definitely be seen from my face.

On the fourth day after I got home, I collapsed myself. Because my husband just gave birth to a baby and cared more about me and the baby, but my mother-in-law called my father-in-law and his eldest son to say that he was unwell, and then their family called my husband to ask him to care more about my mother-in-law. I heard my husband answer so many phone calls, but I didn't see anyone asking about me and my children.

My mother-in-law can't help me at this time, but she wants to distract my husband from taking care of her. To my tears, when my milk hurts, I told my husband that he wanted me to put up with it, but his mother's vegetable cutter was cut and he was so nervous. After I cried, my husband was also very wronged. My wife just gave birth to a child and couldn't take care of her mother. His family told him to take good care of her. Take care of your mother and neglect your wife and children.

On the fifth day of the second month, I had a strong idea to send his mother back. The pain of the wound and emotional dissatisfaction made the whole person collapse. I don't expect you to help me in a timely manner, but I don't want you to hold me back at a critical moment.

Now that my mother-in-law is still here, and what has happened in these ten days, it is difficult to smile at her.

Hehe, I am the kind of daughter-in-law who doesn't know good or bad! People drag their sick bodies to take care of the moon, not only ungrateful but also resentful. But I can only say that she has her grievances and I have my own grievances. Stay away from each other to get along!

Never let your mother-in-law take care of your baby!

Reason: She took care of Zi Yue, and she always owed her in name! Really? I didn't do anything, I couldn't say anything, I couldn't command, I couldn't communicate well, and communication was useless!

It's not that I don't like old people. It is a fact that few people will be considerate of their daughter-in-law. Most of them pretend to be experienced people and think you are melodramatic! Different ideas, why bother? Save some money for the new moon and save yourself trouble!

Shake the baby in the month, it's hard to say, but you have to carry the pot yourself and don't let her take care of the baby! I told her to fuck off! Meaning can be confused, but also care about what!

If you don't serve much, say it's difficult to serve! Even if it's really hard to serve, it's only for a month! Why, you don't get sick when you are old, and you don't need someone to take care of you! Can I go to heaven? Daughter-in-law is not born to you, but to someone else, so you should forget it soon. Why do you talk about your wife everywhere? Are you proud of your wife's problems? It really is!

Finally, mother herself, if you don't care about yourself, who else wants to care about you! Eat potatoes every day, and you can still eat them! Say what you want to eat, don't say it's your problem, say it's not someone else's problem! You can think of another way! Husband can say whatever he wants. You have the right, mother-in-law You'd better stay away. If you have any questions, let him talk. If he doesn't talk, tell him to get out! If it weren't for him, you would only walk with your mother-in-law. He has an obligation to handle your relationship well!

Actually, it's not a big problem People say that your mother-in-law is really awesome, and I don't think others don't know that she is wronged! Ask her if she has a daughter-in-law to pick her up next time. This will not work. You can change at any time! Otherwise, that mouth is so powerful! Good or bad, solve it in the house! Outsiders look at jokes, but show them to outsiders!

It's not melodramatic for a woman to have a baby. Those who say what happened before, you'd better go back to your old days! It seems that the whole world is going backwards, just like you are making progress! It's amazing! Every woman's constitution is different! Don't open your mouth, that's what others do! You are like that, everyone has their own advantages and disadvantages, don't generalize bullshit! No one knows how awesome his physique is! Why do women embarrass women?

Say what, then leave your mother-in-law alone, let your mother come, please sew up their mouths. I understand you very, very well, because I have just experienced the same situation as you. Half a year passed, and I didn't know I was sick until the second month. This is not a lie. I can't get over it. I have been cooking porridge all day, and I want to eat something different, but I don't know how to say a few words at most. I'll spend the rest of the time playing Aauto with the old lady in the living room. Come on, kid. I called for water in the bedroom, and the child cried. She hasn't heard it yet. I don't want to mention it. I can't wait for a divorce at the thought of next month. Fortunately, my husband cares about his family, but many parents don't want to. So you have to walk on your knees the way you choose. It's not my style to repay evil with good anyway.

It's called postpartum depression. Exercise more, do more things you like, and stay away from unhappy people and things, and you will get better gradually.

If you understand it yourself, then make a good adjustment and don't have depression.