FLASH of Chinese character homophone jokes

1 There was a meeting in a township. Because of the homophonic pronunciation, the village chief said: "Rabbits and shrimps, don't ask for pickles, pickles are too expensive." (Comrades, fellow villagers, don't talk, the meeting is now underway . ) The host said: "Please pickles, sausage, pulp and melon." (Now let me give the mayor a speech.

) The township head said: "Rabbits and shrimps, the dog has eaten today's meal, and everyone is using the big tortoise (

Adou's country - free gift

Adou-like character ——I couldn’t bear to overturn the seasoning soup--it had both sour, sweet, bitter, and spicy flavors

I overturned the five-flavor bottle--it had all kinds of sour, sweet, bitter, spicy, and salty flavors

A sneeze would scare a tiger to death. --Hang yourself with a noodle by chance--no one will die

Took the scale beam and forgot to weigh the weight--don't know the importance

Took five horses and poured six sheep--thrown the head down< /p>

Use the eye of a needle as a chimney - little bird

Hold the stick and touch it - grasp the basics

Hold the mallet to sew clothes - take everything seriously ( Needle)

Using a straw hat as a pot lid—buttoning the hats randomly

Take the ticket and enter the theater—can’t match the number

Take the tofu and go Just a foothold on the table --- it doesn't matter

Wipe your neck with a dull knife -- it hurts even if it doesn't kill you

Selling a phoenix like a chicken -- no matter how high or low you are

< p>Take a mouse as a cow - bragging

Take a tiger skin as clothes - scare people

Take an egg for a slippery road - be careful

Using the reins as a hair puller---to put it lightly

Using a wine bottle to fight---drinking and doing it

Using a hoe to plan Coptis chinensis--- Sarcasm

Hitting the moon with a milling basin - not knowing the importance

Rushing to the door with an abacus - looking for a fight (account)

Using a shovel as a pot Make--extremely poor

Take a shoe as a hat--no distinction between top and bottom

Take a pheasant as an offering--the wealth is beyond words

Take the key Running around the streets---not taking charge of the family

Pricking the hand with the sole of the shoe--really irritating

Nanny holding the baby---other people's

Grandma's shoes---the same old style

The baby's mouth opens---for something to eat

Resistant to monkeys climbing cherry trees---rough people eat fine grains

A man’s field edge, a daughter’s shoe edge---beautiful

North and south--nothing

On a southerly day, the stones sweat---the tide has returned

Mr. Nan Guo plays the Yu---uses the Yu indiscriminately

The lantern at Nantianmen---the tube shines high

Nanzhu sticks are used as dishes---hard fried (noisy)

Tumors on the head---heavy burden on the back

Tumors on the head---extra burden

Rubbing oil on the skull---slippery head

Growing horns on the head---outlier than others

Wearing socks on the head---not feet

Wearing a mortar on the head---I don’t know the importance

< p>The doll on the head---lifting people

The forehead has eyes--looking at the sky

The alarm clock sounds haha---smug

The tender ox drags the plow Rake --- fight or run

The capable woman cried in the middle of the night---skilled to death

Climb to the top of the mountain---go to the top (wait)

Pole-climbing competition--see who can climb faster

Fall when climbing stairs--the higher you climb, the harder you fall

The skill of a creeper--the ability to fawn over

< p>Climb on the back of a horse and want to fly to the sky - so far away

Climb on the back of a horse and want to fly into the sky - so far away

Slap the thigh to scare the tiger - no use at all

Flattering a horse on its feet---not only does it do no good, but will result in a kick

Flattering a horse on its mouth--it will bite it

Flattering a horse--- - Kicked on the back

Put your butt and leave--don't care

Pray drawing--the lines are too thick

Queue up to braid---- - Come one at a time

Pork ribs and roasted tofu - some hard and some soft

Take shelter from the rain under the archway - for a while

Pan Jinlian boils medicine - secretly Put poison

Pan Jinlian toasted to Wu Song - with bad intentions

Pan Jinlian toasted - ugly words first

Pan Gu dances - old happy< /p>

Driving on winding mountain roads - be good at turning

The judge handles the case - scary to death <

/p>

The judge performs magic tricks - all the tricks

The girl who looks forward to the sun - a passionate (sunny) person

The girl who looks forward to the sun - wants to be sunny ( Lover)

Crabs eat sorghum---climb up the stalks

Crabs have just shed their shells---the meat is tender

Crabs crossing the river ---Hands and legs

Crab crossing the street---Crawling across the street

Crab holding peas---Rolling and crawling

Crab Teaching children - not taking the right path

Crabs entering the mountain gate - holding the gods

Crabs pulling carts - not following the right path

Crabs pulling carts - using force

Crabs get married--it's all big tortoises

Crabs foam--it's endless

The fat woman crosses the narrow door--the door acts as a blocker.

/p>

Tossing a ball to attract a bride - may not go as planned

Running game - you chase me

If you run away, the monk will not be able to run away from the temple - please don't worry

Run away the shrimp and catch the carp - better management

Run away the sheep to repair the pen - be prepared for later

Run away the horse and make a stumbling block - intentionally harm others

The bubble gum sticks to the glutinous rice - it cannot be pulled apart

The soaked beans - it is not easy

The soaked earth wall - soon Long

The temper of a flamethrower--getting angry when you open your mouth

Put eggs in a basin--uncounted ones

Place landscapes in a basin--fake scenery

Inflated ball--full of anger

Playing with loach---playing tricks

Being a beggar holding a golden bowl--silly with joy

Being a beggar with a golden bowl in hand - why beg for help

Begging for food with a golden bowl in hand - pretending to be poor and complaining

Don't look back when you hit the south wall - --Stubborn

Put on a big cloak and steal a tobacco pouch---Civilized people don't do civilized things

Put on linen to put out fires--ask for trouble

Put on a raincoat to save others --Causing fire (disaster) to the upper body

Wrapped in dog skin---not a human being

Wrapped in cowhide---not recognizing dirt (stolen)

Wrapped in Wearing a raincoat to fight a fire---causing fire (disaster) on the upper body

Wearing a raincoat to fight a fire---causing a fire and burning the body

Arsenic mixed with chili pepper--poisonous

Soaked in arsenic Chili peppers - extremely poisonous

Chili peppers dipped in arsenic - extremely poisonous

Leather shop owner---the bragging king

Cobbler's pole-- - Both ends are cocked (pretty)

The cobbler stumbled---the last was exposed

Leather trousers put on leather trousers--there must be a reason

Leather basket Wash the shrimps in a leather basket---no one can escape

Wash the shrimps in a leather basket---no one can escape

Rub the rubber ball with oil---round and smooth< /p>

The ball was rubbed with oil--it was round and smooth

The ball fell into the soup pot---I called you a bastard, and you were still angry

The ball fell In the oil tank - round and smooth

The ball cracked - deflated

The ball fell into the water - floated on the surface

The ball was poked A knife on the ball - discouraged

A sharp knife on the ball - discouraged

A knife on the ball - softened

Pumpkins in July and August --Pi Lao Xin is not old

Fishing sesame seeds from a seven-foot vat--it takes a lot of effort

A seven-foot man has a six-foot door--had to bow his head

Seven inches Wearing three-inch shoes - hard clothing

Seven monks and one umbrella - can't cover them

Seventh sister meets Chang'e---immortal (present) to immortal (present) < /p>

Seven kilograms of flour mixed with three kilograms of paste---muddled up

Flying a kite on Qili Gang---let it go

Seven Captures of Meng Huo- -Tell him to convince him orally

The seven-year-old boy has been watching the cow for eight years---he is too good at it

The Seventh Fairy marries Dong Yong--takes the initiative

Seven fairies go to their parents' home - Yun

Come in, go in the fog

Seven fairies dream--God knows

Burn incense paper in the middle of July---coax ghosts

Qi Huan Gong Yingzhong--No Remembering past grudges

Ride an old ox and chase a fast horse--out of reach

Ride a donkey and read the songbook--whatever you get

Ride a donkey and take a cane-- It's unnecessary

Ride a donkey and look at the account book---we'll see

Riding a donkey and looking at the person sitting in the sedan--it's not enough compared to the top, but more than the bottom

Riding The golden sword on the camel's back - the golden sword on the horse

The burden of riding a horse - all on the horse

Horse riding without a whip - flattering

Horse riding view Flowers --- don't go deep

Horse a horse to see the lights --- walk and see

Horse a horse across the single-plank bridge--it's hard to turn back

Horse a horse through the busy city--this is unreasonable< /p>

Horse riding will judge --- rush into ghosts right away

Horse riding up to Tianshan Mountain -- look back to see the heights

Spend less time riding horses and more time cleaning stirrups -- this is not an inversion

You don’t need to be driven when you ride a donkey - you are familiar with it

You meet your in-laws when you are riding a bull - what a coincidence

You are looking for a cow when you are riding a bull - an old fool

p>

Ride a horse and eat roast chicken---I don’t know where to throw these bones.

Ride a fast horse and beg for food---drive out the poor

ride On the back of a tiger---it's hard to get off

Riding on the back of a tiger---don't dare to get off

Riding on a tiger---you can't help yourself

Riding a donkey looking for a donkey --- dizzy

Riding a camel and eating steamed buns --- the stuffing is opened

Riding a camel and eating steamed buns --- being happy with the stuffing< /p>

Riding a camel and driving chickens - not knowing the high and low

Riding a donkey and reading the songbook - we'll see

Meeting an opponent - equally matched

The veteran general on the chessboard - unable to move out of the square

The earth image on the chessboard - the general will not leave

The pieces on the chessboard - twist and move One step

Playing the huqin on top of the flagpole - singing a high tune

Lantern on the flagpole - Gao Ming

Hanging mines on the flagpole - fantasy (ring) < /p>

A trumpet is installed on the flagpole - the sound is high

The beggar is jealous - he looks poor and sour

The beggar eats plums - he is poor and sour

The beggar rings the bell - he is so poor

The beggar's clothes - there are many flaws

The beggar's life - depends entirely on the charity of others

The beggar enters Hair salon - no one cares

Beggars performing yangko - poor and happy

Beggars talking crosstalk - talking nonsense

Beggars raising pigs - no luck

The crane lifts the lantern--not worth mentioning

The crane lifts the chicken feather---it takes no effort

The crane lifts the chicken feather---overkill

Balloons Go up to the sky - it's blowing

Graduated from the Meteorological University - when you hear it, it's rain, when you see flashes, it's thunder

Cars set off cannons---discourage

The car gets bigger Tree---fooling around

A car is on fire--ask someone to push it

Bricks to build a wall--come from behind

Dyeing master---get it Don't take any action

A frequent visitor to the dyeing shop - a lustful person

The boss of the dyeing shop - a lustful person

The flute is played in the dyeing room - very colorful

The girl in the dyeing room wears white shoes---Zi Bu Dye (ran)

The beating stone at the door of the dyeing room---past the big guys

The clothes in the dyeing vat --Change the original color

White cloth dropped from the dye vat--can't be washed anymore

Dye's clothes--it's impossible not to be contaminated

Dye's exit River - at the mercy of others

Let the stammering thoughts return to the command - forcing others to do what is difficult

The chatty crow - the old tune

The crab in the hot pot - claws Tight

Ants on a hot pot---Wandering around in a hurry

Ants on a hot pot---Crawling around

Ants on a hot pot-- -Desperate

Smoking coals in a hot brazier - left out in the cold

<

p>The white flour on the hot kang--it's hot

The hot clay man---it was made by Cai (Cai)

The temper of the hot water bottle--cold outside, hot inside

< p>Thermos bottle - cold on the outside and hot on the inside

Fried beans in a hot spot - once cooked, jump out again

Ants in a hot spot - anxious to move around

Sending fans in enthusiasm and providing help in snowy weather--what urgent people need

Fill out the form in the talent market-self-promotion

When people are under low eaves--they have to be low

When people go under low eaves---they have to bow their heads

If you are over thirty and do not learn skills--you are old

The bald man in the crowd---his head is conspicuous

p>

Everyone wants to wear a bun---but their hair is not up to par

If there are a hundred people---they are all skilled in martial arts

People are separated by bellies and trees are separated by skin- --It's hard to get to know each other

Throw away the walking stick and bow----Brothers and brothers

Walking around in the streets during the day, boiling oil to mend the crotch at night

Sunset in the west mountain-- It will only be red for a while

The downy duck has just entered the water--new learning

The pom-pom hits the face--to scare people

The pom-pom hits the gong--no response

Buying and selling on the meat case - fussing over every detail

Hitting a dog with a meat bun--throwing something away

Hitting a dog with a meat bun--go away Don't look back

Rou Dunzi beats the dog---there is no return

Rou Dunzi--so oily

Meat and bones blow the trumpet---meat (faint) )Dudu

The meat and bones beat the big drum--a bit meaty and six-vegetarian

The meat and bones fell into the pot--it is determined by chewing (definitely)

The meat and bones Beat the drum---Hunted meat and potatoes

Burned tofu with meat and bones---uneven soft and hard

Boiled glutinous rice balls in a meat pot---Hunted eggs< /p>

Boil Yuanxiao in a meat pot - muddy eggs

The meat is rotten in the pot - no distinction is made between them

The meat is rotten in the soup - no one suffers< /p>

Soft bread dumplings--easy to squeeze

A blessing in disguise---who knows the blessings

Cheek plaster--no shame

Three hundred kilograms of wild boar----a big mouth

Three meals of fried radish and fresh rice---no salt (word)

Three-foot-long saw--- Pulling and pushing

A three-foot-long ladder---cannot reach the eaves (answer)

A face that cannot be cut with three swords---thick skin

p>

Three cents flour and seven cents water - very confused

Three cents to buy a duck head - cheap mouth

Three cents to buy sesame seed cakes to see how thick they are--- Very stingy

Eating ice cubes in the dog days of summer---cooling the whole body

Wearing a leather jacket in the dog days of summer--heating inside and outside

An electric fan in the dog days of summer-- So busy

The sorghum stalks in the dog days---rising steadily

The dogs in the dog days--out of breath

Drink in the dog days Ice water - just what you want

Drinking herbal tea in the dog days of summer - just the right time

Meat that cannot be sold in the dog days of summer - smelly goods

Sell it in the dog days of summer Rotten fish---stinky goods

Burning the stove in the dog days of summer--it's so hot

Three nostrils---extra breath like yours

Three A cobbler - just like Zhuge Liang

Three cooks killing six chickens - in a hurry

Three Bodhisattvas burning two sticks of incense - no hope for you

Three dollars for tofu brain---ready-made

Three dollars for a toad---the more you look at it, the more disadvantages you get

Three dollars for a beef belly-- Just noisy (grass)

Three dollars to buy a donkey--riding and boasting

Three dollars to buy a bowl of rabbit blood---not a good thing

Three dollars to buy a pig's head - just one mouth

Three land halls---Temple, temple, temple (wonderful, wonderful, wonderful)

Three hairs rubbing a rope-- - So thin

Three shit sticks support a thin shoulder - put on a stinky air

Three shit sticks support a table - a stinking air

Born in the middle of the night ---People from Haishi (killing people)

>The third update has passed - it's too late

Chiang Kai-shek of the Three Kingdoms - a mistake

Three plus two minus five - equals zero

Three houses Don't open the door--monster (house)

Triangular cemetery---bad character

Triangular bricks--not evenly

Three-legged cat--running around

Three and a half kilograms of duck---charged goose

Eat popsicles for three-nine days--it chills the heart; you know whether you are hot or cold

Eat ice cubes for three-nine days-- --It's so cold

Wearing a singlet for three-nine days--it starts to tremble; it doesn't look impressive

Wearing a skirt for three-nine days--beautifully frozen person

Sanjiutian’s dried tofu--cold and hard

Sanjiutian’s beggar--cold and hungry

Sanjiutian’s ginger soup--warm-hearted< /p>

Send a fan for three-nine days - not grateful

Talking for three-nine days - cold words

No cold water for three-nine days - cool from the inside out

p>

Three copper plates are placed in two places---one is one, and the other is two

Three taels of silver are placed in the account--the interest is rare

Three-liang brother The son of the rich - the second-rate son

Three acres of hair - only a handful

Three acres of cotton and three acres of rice--whether it's sunny or rainy

Three years of not pooping---fecal bloating(bastard)

Three years of not rinsing--a stinky mouth

Three years of old debt---repay What is it for?

Three relatives and six old friends, four friends and eight friends - a group of friends

Three people drink a glass of wine - take turns

Three people and two beards---rare

It’s hard to be the boss if you don’t steal for three days---prudery

Thirty miles of scolding the county magistrate---useless

< p>Thirty-six Strategies---Going is the Best Strategy

Thirty-Six Lines---Practice to be the Number One Scholar

Thirty years to bloom, forty years to bear fruit--- Lao Guoguo (brother)

Thirty years of widowhood---Lao Waiting

Thirty nights without a moon---the same thing every year

Cooking porridge on the 30th night---this is not how to celebrate the new year

It’s too late to encourage the pig on the 30th night

The cutting board on the 30th night--- Not available

Buying New Year pictures on the 30th night---I couldn’t find the ones I bought

The cow ran away on the 30th night---next year’s events

Carrying an empty basket on thirty nights—nothing to do

Looking at the moon on thirty nights—no hope

Drying clothes on thirty nights—not doing it this year Do it next year

Pick up snails with three fingers---nine times out of ten

A three-year-old baby--the most important thing is innocence

A three-year-old child has watched cows for nine years-- - Not yet

Three-year-old child---relying on coaxing

Three-year-old child buys a coffin--make preparations early

Not sleeping for three days-- Listless

Three days of fishing and two days of drying nets---a grinder

Three days of selling two cucumbers---not in a hurry

Three loach clips Give two to the cat---to keep your ears quiet

He recited his sutra, and I worshiped my Buddha--not to interfere with each other

Put nose and wear glasses---find Can't find the resting place

The rubber ball was stepped on-----stomach irritation

Looked up and dropped the hat---looking too high

Carrying the food box Climb the tree---Feasting on the branches is polite (reasonable)

The shrimps of Taihu Lake--Bai Man (mang)

The skill of Tai Chi--soft but hard

p>

Seagulls in the Pacific - courageous

The Taishi chair is on fire - it is difficult to sit and stand

To stir up trouble on Tai Sui's head - to cause trouble

p>

Emperor Taiwu's taste - neither cold nor hot, neither soft nor hard

Looking at the canal on Taihang Mountain - water far away cannot quench the thirst of the nearer

Dew under the sun ---Soon long

Light a lamp under the sun--Duo She

The sun and the moon talk--empty talk

The sun has left the earth--it's bright

The sun sets on the head - disaster is imminent

The snowman under the sun - not long

For a long time

The green pines of Mount Tai---Eternally green

Greedy will not save seeds--after today, not tomorrow

The greedy ghosts attend the banquet---nothing Full

A greedy fish - easy to take the bait

The paralytic does not go out - works (sits) at home

The paralytic falls into a muddy pond - cannot extricate himself

The paralyzed man fell into the well - he sat down when he was picked up

The paralyzed man cut the road - he sat down and shouted

The paralyzed man fell into the wrong road - he sat on the ground and shouted

>

A paralyzed man carries water - cannot afford the responsibility

A paralyzed man catches bad guys - unreliable

The bean sprouts in the jar---Yuanqu (injustice) is dead

Lighting a lamp in the jar - shining inside but not outside

Buckwheat rabbits in the jar - getting smaller as they are raised

Planting flowers in the jar - Yuanqu (Injustice) Dead

Feeding pigs in a jar - one by one

Raising bastards in a jar - living but not growing

Raising turtles in a jar ---The more you grow, the smaller you grow

Throwing dice in the jar--did not run away

Planting beans in the jar--cannot take root

Catching spicy beans in the jar- - Dangerous Hands

Catching a turtle in a jar - it's easy to catch it

Epiphyllum blooms - suddenly appears

Conversation without lighting a lamp - talking slander

< p>The Bodhisattva carved from sandalwood---not spiritual, but stable but stable

The oil tip made of sandalwood---beaten

Poached duck in the soup pot---protruding Open your mouth

Tang Bohu enters Prince Ning's Mansion - pretending to be crazy and acting stupid

Tang Bohu pursues Qiuxiang - using every possible means

Tang Sanzang's disciples - three

< p>Tang Sanzang read Buddhist scriptures--the words were written in a clear way

Tang Sanzang passed the Flame Mountain--no mantras

Tang Sanzang passed Pingding Mountain---more bad luck than good

Tang Sanzang recited the Tightening Curse---The Hericium suffered

Tang Sanzang learned the scriptures---it all depended on the monkey

Tang Sanzang bumped into the Ox-Hair King--the tongue was shortened

Tang Monk studied - a serious scripture

Tang Monk studied scriptures - single-mindedly

Tang Monk believed in the white-bone spirit - no distinction between human and demon

Tangshan's train--- Pouring coal (bad luck)

Making wine in the main room and selling it in the kitchen - it’s so cheap that you can’t go out

Hanging dung buckets in the main room - notorious throughout the world

Hanging animals in the main room Skin--not like words (painting)

Tangli is not called Tangli--Duli (in the belly)

Duckweed in the pond---it takes root but does not fall to the ground

p>

A loach in the pond---can't make big waves

There are no fish in the pond---the shrimps are expensive

A boat in the pond---no way out

Made dolls out of sugar--suitable for sweet people

People made of sugar---will be blown away

Mantis blocks the car and shows dominance---no good end< /p>

The mantis blocks the car---it is overestimating its own capabilities

The mantis has a belly and a toad mouth--look at your example

The mantis falls into the frying pan---the whole body is sour (sour) )

The mantis pounces on the cicada---no worries about the consequences

Lying down and talking--not afraid of back pain

The monkey who burned his butt--his eyes turned red

p>

A hot porridge basin - throwing away the heartache, but not throwing away the hand

Digging out the flesh to mend the sore---it cannot heal

Dig a well and hit an artesian spring- -Just what I wanted

I dug out my eyes and became a judge--I am blind to the end

Poached others to make up for my own shortcomings---I did all the immoral things

Crock Pot And adobe---products from the first kiln

Drying soybeans on the tiles---nine times out of ten they will run

Frost on the tiles---not long-lasting

The tiles Pomegranate - so hard to eat

Change socks into trousers - Gao Sheng

Twist your neck and hang a necklace - not necessarily beautiful

Twist your neck to look at your watch - Wrong views

Talking with a crooked neck - not speaking the right words

Wearing a hat crookedly and squinting eyes - you are like a second-rate person

Wearing a hat crookedly and wearing a coat crookedly - Unseemly

Crooked pot with flat stove - one set for the other

>

Crooked pot with crooked stove---two generals

Watching a show with a crooked head---blame the wrong stage

Watching a show with a crooked head---unreasonable trouble< /p>

Blow conch with crooked mouth---two generals

Drink soup with crooked mouth---drink left (joint) and drink right (joint)

Monk with crooked mouth Bragging --- barking (cult)

A monk with a crooked mouth chants sutras --- the more he chants, the more crooked he becomes

Looking in the mirror with a crooked mouth --- embarrassing himself in person

Eating pomegranates with a crooked mouth - coming up with crooked ideas

Blowing a lamp with a crooked mouth - full of evil (slanted) air

Playing a flute with a crooked mouth - not pleasing to the eye

Blowing the trumpet with a crooked mouth - an evil (slanted) air

Wearing a mask with a crooked mouth - no problem can be seen

Being a cavalry with a crooked mouth - immediately embarrassed

p>

The crooked-mouthed monk eats a screw——If it is crooked, it will be crooked

The crooked-mouthed monk blows the lamp——a slanting breath

The crooked-mouthed monk chants sutras—— Can't say a serious word

The crooked man blows the trumpet--the tune is wrong

The crooked woman stumbles--it's wrong to go up or down

The crooked mother-in-law drinks Soup - drink left and right

Grandpa died - there is no way to save (uncle)

Foreign trade goods are not up to standard - difficult to export

Grandma has a small child Son--he is saved (uncle)

Grandma is dead---uncle is dead (unsaved))

Xinjiang’s honeydew melon------sweet

The newly opened dyeing room--it’s okay if you don’t give some color to see

The groom wears filial piety--a mixture of joy and sorrow

The bride comes to the hall----- -faceless

The bride is weaving----in a hurry

The new daughter-in-law is pregnant---secretly happy

The new daughter-in-law cries for her father-in-law------ I can't tell you a good thing

The new daughter-in-law gets into the sedan chair---cowardly

New clothes patched--not decent

Newly planted toilet ------Sanwuxiang

Newly planted willows------a bare stem

Newly picked chestnut balls---many thorns

< p>Fountain duck---the body is rotten but the mouth is still hard. How can the jujube core be broken---without a saw (sentence