Specializing in unhappy hilarious copywriting

1. "Do you like my angel face or the devil's figure?" "I just like your sense of humor."

2. "Why is mother-in-law more difficult than girlfriend?" "Because my mother-in-law was cheated once!"

3. I remember talking about the Imperial Capital and Luoyang in middle school history class. I asked the teacher, before you spoke Mandarin, did the court use dialects? For example: "Hey! You son of a bitch Pull it out! " Suddenly, the teacher was white and bloodless.

Today, I sent a message saying "I'm already very ill", and my friend, a bum, strongly replied "I'll have a dream if I go to the funeral".

I go to work because I have no money, but why do I get paid when I go to work without money? I don't understand which link is wrong. Is there a middleman to make the difference?

6. The skin is the most magical part of the human body. For some people, it can be big or small, thick or thin, or even dispensable.

7. I passed a person countless times, and the clothes were all scratched and there was no spark.

8. Those husbands gave big red envelopes, so I just want to ask, how do you manage your family? Why does your husband have so much money?

9. Just walking on the road, I received a strange phone call, and a woman said, "Hello! Congratulations on winning the second prize of 300,000 yuan in our company! " Before I could speak, she smiled and said, "I'm sorry, I lied for the first time!" " "Then she hung up and left me standing in the wind.

10. You'd better show your love at noon. Do you know why? Because sooner or later there will be retribution!

1 1. At the gate of the cemetery, a man asked, "How much is the paper house?" The stall owner replied: "20 yuan!" "So expensive! Didn't you just spend 15 yuan last year? " "House prices have gone up!"

12. There was a female classmate in college who had a good relationship with me and was a little ambiguous, and went to a big class in heaven. She confessed to me and whispered to me: Be my prince. When I get excited, I answer directly: OK, Mom.

13. Teacher: "What is the plural of Boy?" Student: "Gay."

14. "I have your wife, and I want her to transfer the money to the bank account!" "Are you new here? I wonder if men don't care about money? "

15. Today, I trained my dog at home. After the training, my husband walked over and said to the dog earnestly, "Oh, how dare you fight with the tiger?" You are just a dog. "

16. One day, Peggy Piggy cried and said to her mother, "The children say I look like a hair dryer." Mother pig said sadly, "Be good, stay away from my mother next time, and don't blow my hair up."

17. I saw a friend send a message yesterday that "a man is tired, but he is not guilty of cheating". Then the next comment said, "It's tiring to have a baby. Never mind whose it is, okay? "

18. I met my old classmate in the street today. I didn't expect him to be so poor now. I only put a dollar in my bowl.

19. A couple's girlfriend asked piteously, "Why can't we live in a more expensive house?" The man said, "We will live in an expensive house soon. The landlord said that he would increase our rent from tomorrow.

20. A little boy walked into a toy store with fake money to buy a toy plane. Aunt waiter said, "Little friend, your money is not real." The little boy asked, "Aunt, is your plane real?"

2 1. Teacher: "Can anyone come up with the slogan of caring for grass?" Xiao Ming: "Today you step on my head, and tomorrow I will grow on your grave!" " "

22. When cooking for the first time, I asked my dad how he was. He said: "This salt is well fried and has a faint egg flavor." .

23. Go to a new company for an interview. Interviewer: Are you organized? Me: absolutely no problem! I once organized a general strike in my last company!

24. "Why do you give so many emotional suggestions to others, yourself or single dog?" "When do you think the coach's next game is?"