Why don't many young people of school age want to fall in love?

Why are more and more young people unwilling to fall in love?

Emotional consulting room

2022-10-1120: 00 Jiangsu

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Have you noticed that more and more young people are unwilling to fall in love now, and some even regard falling in love as a scourge, shouting "Smart people don't fall in love".

Why is this happening?

According to my observation of young people who have been single for a long time around, the reasons why they are unwilling to fall in love are as follows:

1. Being hurt by feelings, I no longer believe in love.

Some people don't want to fall in love because they are hurt in their feelings and no longer believe in love.

For example, I met an object who was always cold and violent, and suffered a lot of grievances and sufferings in my feelings; For example, PUA, who is always the object of love, has been depressed for a long time; For example, the other half cheated, leaving them with serious emotional trauma.

People who have been hurt in feelings like this will have deep negative emotions, even shadows, and think that falling in love is uncomfortable, so they are unwilling to take the initiative to talk.

2. Too much investment in love often requires self-sacrifice.

When asked why some young people don't fall in love, they often say:

"I also want to fall in love, but I have no time, no energy and no money. How can I talk? "

The real meaning of this sentence is that falling in love requires a lot of investment, and even a lot of times you need to sacrifice yourself to maintain the relationship. After seeing this, some young people are unwilling to sacrifice so much to meet the needs of love, so they choose to be single.

I can't deal with emotional problems, and it's hard for me to get happiness from love.

Compared with interpersonal relationship, love relationship is more complicated and difficult to deal with. If your EQ is acceptable, then you can still talk about a good relationship. However, if your emotional intelligence is average and you don't know how to deal with emotional problems, then intimacy will only consume you indefinitely.

Many people avoid love only because they don't have enough emotional intelligence, can't deal with emotional problems, and it is difficult to get happiness from love.

4. Self-awareness is too heavy, I don't want to accommodate others, and I don't want to suppress myself.

Contemporary young people are more and more open-minded, their horizons are wider and wider, and they have many different definitions of the value of life. They no longer regard love and marriage as the goal of life, but pay more attention to themselves and pursue the richness of their souls. At the same time, they care more about personal boundaries and are unwilling to accommodate others and wronged themselves.

Falling in love is to accommodate and take care of another person's feelings, and can no longer live as one pleases. People with strong self-awareness often choose not to fall in love and focus on their own lives.

5. Reality has punctured the young people's fantasy of love and understood that the essence of love is transaction.

In the process of growing up, most people have unrealistic imagination of love, thinking that love is noble, beautiful and pure, and lovers are kind, excellent and lovely.