Begging for a funny joke

I've been fidgeting at school. I taught myself for the first time when I was a freshman. I was so depressed sitting in the classroom that I immediately ran to the aisle to smoke.

Not long after I lit a cigarette, a girl from PL came over and asked me, "Now I'm studying by myself! How did you get out? "

I said, I'm bored by smoking, MM Which class are you in? How also ran out.

PLMM pointed to our classroom and said, that class!

At that time, I was so excited to say, are we in the same class? What, are you depressed?

She said: well, a freshman in our class ran out from self-study and I came out to find him.

I smiled, it seems that someone still can't sit still. What do you want from him? You're not his mother!

MM: I can't help it I'm his head teacher!

I was cheated at that time. ......

A minute later, I choked up and said, Teacher, you look so young. ......

Yesterday, I went to eat KFC. The man behind me looks like a couple. They ordered a lot of food and sat next to me. After sitting down, the girls began to eat hard, as if they were hungry for several days, while the boys chewed French fries one by one, as if they had something on their mind.

Suddenly, the boy put down the French fries, leaned down and asked seriously, "Qingqing, can I chase you?"

Without looking up, the girl said directly, "No!"

The boy asked again, "Is it completely impossible?"

The girl simply said, "Not at all!"

The boy froze, looked straight at her and stayed there. ......

At that time, the girl was holding a chicken leg in one hand and a hamburger in the other. She thought that the boy was watching her, so she stopped eating, then looked at the boy with poor eyes and whispered, "So ... can I still eat?"

Everyone including me laughed out loud. The boy was helpless and said, "Eat, eat ..."

This MM is so cute ... if I don't let it go, I have to chase it ... hard! ! ! !

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A brother went to the toilet and ended up in the ladies' room by mistake. When I went in, I found there was no urinal. It doesn't feel right Fortunately, there is no one in the ladies' room. He walked out casually. When I opened the door, I met a mm who came in. Face to face with him, blushed, lowered his head and turned to drill in the men's room.

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One day, there were too many people on the bus, which was hot and stuffy. I don't know who farted, which made the environment worse. My friend can't stand it, and I don't know who it is. I can't help it It happened that the conductor was asking, "Who didn't buy a ticket?" My friend suddenly had a plan and said loudly, "Fart didn't buy a ticket!" " Suddenly, a particularly fat woman, holding the ticket high in her hand, said loudly, "I have bought the ticket!" " "

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Bicycles in school are lost seriously, and the new ones disappear in the blink of an eye, but sometimes with luck, the lost bicycles will reappear every few days. One day, Xiao Jing, a roommate, bought a new gearbox. She showed off to everyone and said, "I locked this car with the latest lock!" " "The next day, Xiao Jing came back from night lessons and looked depressed. He still holds a piece of paper in his hand, which reads: Don't be the owner here, I borrowed the car, and I'll pay you back in a few days!

A few days later, the thief really returned the car. Xiao Jing is very happy, but she is worried that the car will be "borrowed" again. I bought ten big locks, locked the car tightly, and posted a note to the thief: See how you "borrow"! When Xiao Jing went downstairs the next morning, she found five more locks on the car, and there was a note on the lock: See how you ride!

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This happened in my middle school, and it is necessary today.

It was an English class, and the teacher asked us to make sentences with "How …". At that time, there were daily expressions such as "hello, hello". But the problem is that when we brainstorm for answers, we only hear a man in the back row say, "What an excellent root ~ ~ ~ ~" (I believe friends who have played Street Fighter)

2 secretly watching. . . Don't laugh.

In middle school, a classmate moved and invited everyone to his house for dinner. . Lots of dishes. At the dinner table, his mother stood up and said politely, "You must eat and drink enough." You're welcome. You can't waste it. Now that you have moved to a new home, it's a pity that there are no pigs at home. "

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H Jun and his friends enter an upscale shopping center. I took two steps after I entered the store. My friend was surprised to see him skating on the smooth marble floor. Asked him, while continuing to skate, H Jun pointed to the sign next to him and said seriously, "Since we are here, we must abide by the rules here." The sign says "Be careful skating".

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A leader went to the countryside for a census and asked an old farmer: Do you know why close relatives can't get married? The old farmer replied with a simple and honest smile: Hehehe, Hehehe, the relationship is too familiar, and there is no way to start.

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A sculpture was completed in the new building of a university: a young girl held a book in her left hand and a dove symbolizing peace in her right hand. Publicly soliciting names from off-campus students, many people's slogans coincide-reading is for birds!

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There is such a question in a literature exam:

Explanation of nouns: Shakespeare (honorific title of Shakespeare)

A classmate once answered this question: Shakespeare, a strange bird.

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When I was in primary school, there was a text called? Waterfall? Yes, the middle author turned a mountain and saw a waterfall hanging among the mountains. When one of my female classmates was reading aloud, she was also reading aloud: I was shocked when I climbed over this mountain, and there was a rag hanging on the mountain. The whole class was stunned.

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A brother is constipated and can't be comfortable in the toilet for a long time. Just as he was going all out, he watched a buddy rush into the toilet like the wind and enter the next position. There was a real bubble club as soon as he entered, which made him feel good. The brother said enviously to the elder brother: The elder brother envies you very much.

That buddy said: I envy you to death, I haven't taken off my pants yet ~ ~

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I took my youngest son to my friend's birthday. After dinner, everyone went to sing karaoke, and the younger son volunteered to sing for the protagonist. There was applause. ~ I sang a birthday song to my uncle. Everyone is in a commotion. I looked back at the screen and prayed.

I just bought a house and called a buddy excitedly:' I bought a house and only one room (I forgot to say the word' blank') needs to be renovated. "The buddy said," Is there only one toilet? Where do you live?