Simple and interesting talk show jokes

Life needs humor, and these simple and funny talk shows are the best toner for life. The following is a simple and funny talk show joke I arranged for you. I hope it will help you.

Simple and funny talk show jokes (hot articles)

1. When I was in college, sometimes I really didn't want to eat the food in the canteen, so I went to the food street off campus. There are various delicacies such as roast duck and roast chicken, which greatly increases the appetite. Then I went back to the school cafeteria and bought two steamed buns and half a dish to eat.

On one occasion, Xiao Ming and his parents went to the nude beach. Xiao Ming asked inexplicably, Dad, why are their penises bigger than yours? Dad said awkwardly, because they have money? Then dad went to buy drinks. When I came back, my mother was gone, so my father asked Xiaoming: Where did my mother go? Xiao Ming said: An uncle just came and saw his mother, and then he became richer and richer. Then mom left with him.

3. When I was taking a nap with my daughter today, the courier called me. I was afraid to wake the baby, so I lowered my voice and said, who are you? As a result, the courier also said in a low voice, I will deliver it downstairs. You come down and get it. I told him I couldn't leave and told him to come up. He said to me in a low voice, okay, okay, why are you so mysterious?

The child got up late for the college entrance examination.

Zhuge Liang and Zhou Yu thought of attacking Cao Cao's water army with fire, but Zhou Yu was at a loss because of the west wind. Kongming gently shook the feather fan and said with a smile, "Don't worry, Gong Jin, I'll watch the sky at night, and there will be an easterly wind in three days. ? Zhou Yuwen heard his voice change and shouted:? Don't take Zhuge with me! My master has made it clear that diplomats from all countries are strictly forbidden to engage in meteorological monitoring data publishing services that are inconsistent with their status! ?

6. A man found his wife cheating and invited a sniper to monitor him. Snipers ask where you want to hit them. The man said, I beat the adulterer's penis, and my wife nagged all day, so I broke her mouth. The sniper said: I charge 5000 dollars for each bullet. One day the adulterer will get the fruit. The sniper aimed for half an hour and finally fired a shot, then stood up and patted the dust on his body and said to the man, I saved you $5,000! . . .

7. A pedestrian hung a teapot on a telephone pole, and the teapot suddenly fell to the ground and broke, but he kept going without looking back. Others shout when they see it. Hey, the teapot is broken! ? The man replied lightly:? Now that it's broken, what's the use of turning back? Hearing this, the crowd was furious and surrounded by a beating. Beat and scold: Littering everywhere, what the fuck are you pretending to be cool? ! ?

8. The full text of the primary school student's composition "Tangle" is as follows: I broke up with Duan Wuji, and now I am waiting for the clock, but in fact I like Fang Shujia very much and miss her very much. . . But her sister Fang is more beautiful, and I like her better. . . But my heart has always loved walking on the snow, and how much I want to be with her forever ~ ~ ~ and of course her sister is still working. . .

9. Now the house price is expensive, just buy a small bike to ride, but Superman still wants to be! But it's a bit tricky to ride.

10. If Ruoxi really came from modern times, then when she first saw Grandpa Four almost flying, Ruoxi's normal reaction should be: Ah, Nicky Wu!

1 1. Altman, don't cry, the little monster will always be with you. If you are in a bad mood, just hit me.

The teacher said to Xiaoming: Milk means small. For example, a suckling pig is a piglet. Please make a sentence with the word milk. ? Xiaoming:? My family is very poor and can only live on 40 square meters of breasts. ? Teacher dizzy: this will not work. Change it. ? Xiaoming:? I jump over the cleavage in front of my house every day when I go to school. ? Teacher dizzy: no, change another one. ? Xiaoming:? Teacher, I can't think of it. I think my nipples are broken! ?

13. There are three kinds of people in the iPhone world: authorities, sources and insiders who don't want to be named. Three things in the Android world: the machine king and the top configuration, will be listed soon. Three highlights of shanzhai world: N-card N-belt, long standby, Phoenix Legend?

14. This is all performed by one person! No wonder Friar Sand has only a few words. . . He can't recite. . .

15. The family rules written by a boy to his daughter-in-law are overbearing and loving! Daughter-in-law, listen carefully This is my family rule, you must abide by it.

16. Some people say that Wang Xiaojian will be built in ten years, Ke Jingteng in a hundred years and Li Daren in a thousand years. Your him, where is he?

17. It took me a long time to pay for my mobile phone, so I realized that my words were so valuable.

18. If you still miss someone, put his photo in black and white, buy a photo frame, put it in your bag, take it out when you miss him, and then tell yourself that he is dead. . . . . .

19. Our traffic is used by these four things. . . If you are, then turn around! ! !

20. It turns out that I am so excellent: taller than Jing M.Guo, whiter than Bolt, more handsome than Shenyang, more handsome than neck, stronger than Gong Hanlin, less acne than Liu Xiang, louder than Zeng Ge, clearer than Jay Chou, and more able to speak Chinese than Brad Pitt? Seeing that you are better than so many celebrities, you can't help but be full of cows? ! ! !

Simple and interesting talk show jokes (classic)

1. Double 12, don't chop hands, chop feet!

2. Just after Shuang 1 1 and Shuang 12, the daughter-in-law who lost her family spent money like water. I want to buy a Porsche to treat myself at the end of the year, and now I still need 654.38+0 million. What should I do?

3. Double 12, sunny weather, shooting outfield.

4. Buy 1 1 for fun, 65438+go out to play in early February, and buy 12 for fun. The stock is gone, and the small vault is gone. The thief is sad.

5. I don't want to be sleepy. I really want to argue with my aunts 12.

6. It is enough to watch what you like being snatched from the shelf. Double11double12 Please leave me alone.

7. Double 12 Alipay activities are crowded with people. It's a pity not to join in the fun ~ I solved my lunch and successfully swept around to Iraq.

8. Double 12 welfare. First, eat 50% off the steak from Su, Taiwan Province Province, and then go to the pizza shop to learn guzheng at 50% off as a snack. Breakfast milk bar is 40 MINUS 20, and two F's say that eating more than 20 is not cheap.

9. Shuang 12, you grinding demon, you are exhausted. You go to bed at 3 and get up at 9. You're exhausted. It's good to see first.

10. Double 12 red envelope. I haven't had time to get it.

1 1. Double 12 Don't panic, you can't afford it anyway.

12. Double Twelve is here. I wish you happiness every day, every hour and every minute of the year.

13. Horrible double 12, couples all went on a date, leaving only a group of diaosi shopping.

14. The best thing about Ma Yun is that he seems to be the ugliest man in the world who made his fortune on eat woman soft rice.

15. attention, married men, the first thing to do when you get up is to open your wife's AliPay and online banking, and enter the wrong password three times in a row before going to work. Remember. Don't ask me who I am. My name is Lei Feng.

16. At 0: 00, dozens of high-rise buildings in the community are still brightly lit, and every household is brightly lit. It's quiet and bright here. There is no noise from TV and stereo, no quarrel between husband and wife, only the click of the mouse. Uncle Wang in the guard room of the community watched all this silently, thought for a long time, lit another cigarette, and finally firmly turned off the main switch of the community.

17. that night, he saved hundreds of millions of yuan in property losses for the owners of the community.

18. I am a principled person. In the final analysis, my principle of being a man is only three words, depending on my mood.

19. There are always a few wrong steps in the long road of life. Knowing you is also a mistake.

20. Once upon a time, there was a man peddling in the street with a spear and shield. My spear is the sharpest spear in the world and can pierce any shield. My shield is the strongest shield in the world, and no spear can pierce it. A wise man in the crowd smiled and said to him? You said that your spear is the sharpest spear and your shield is the sharpest shield. Then, sell me your spear and shield at a discount. ?

Simple and funny talk show jokes (selected articles)

1. In the thought class, the teacher said: If God asked him to sprinkle something in the sky, what would you let him sprinkle? A: Knowledge, B: Money, C: Hope. A classmate immediately stood up and answered: B, B, B, B. .

2.？ Will you abandon me? No? How touching! Why can't you throw it? It is too heavy. ?

3. Husband:? Honey, do you want me to rub your back? Wife:? No need. ? Husband:? Honey, I'll get you foot washing water! ? Wife:? No need! ? Husband:? Let me do some housework! ? Wife:? Honey, you don't have to do anything, just kneel all morning?

Go to my girlfriend's house to meet my parents today. I found out that her sister is actually my first girlfriend in junior high school, and her father is the unit leader of our company. The most ridiculous thing is that her mother is the head teacher who plays Yuanyang in high school. I have a special hatred for your family, don't I?

Dear husband, you can play hard! Smoke hard! Angry at me! You can't walk when you are old! I will push you to the park in a wheelchair every day, let you watch me dance square dance with other old people, and then push you home at night. When going downhill, go away, go away! Let you go where you want.

You ask me why I'm so short, and I'll tell you. I'll scare you to death when I pull my three-meter-long leg out of the soil.

7. I have been serving people named Ma all my life: the first Marx changed my thinking, the second Ma Yun changed my consumption concept, the third Ma Rong subverted my outlook on life, and the fourth mosaic prevented me from exploring human civilization.

8. male:? I will take care of you all my life. I have ten dollars, and I will give you nine dollars. ? Woman:? What if you have100000? Man:? Then I'll give you all ten dollars! ?

9. On the subway, the man thought the girl standing opposite looked familiar and kept looking at the girl. The girl was annoyed: What are you looking at? Then the boy said, I think you look like my ex-girlfriend ? The girl is angry: I am your ex-girlfriend! ?

10. My boyfriend loves me very much and will think of everything for me. I went to his house for the first time today, fearing that taking off high heels would make his parents see that I was too short. He grabbed me with a bright face: nothing. I told them that your feet stink and you can't take off your shoes. ?

1 1. In fact, sometimes I lose my temper, not because I have a lot of temper, but because I give a lot of smiles, and he thinks you are easy to bully.

12. I often struggle between staying up late to copy my homework and going to bed early. Later, I chose to stay up late to play with my mobile phone.

13. You must have been a plastic bag in your last life. In addition, you can also pack.

14. Say good night to each other and then stay up late.

15. If I can't talk to you, I can wait, but don't let me catch you talking.

16. There is a kind of person who will pour you hot water to take medicine on time when you are sick, and will gently blow the water clean before handing it to you. Another person will take a sip before handing it to you, thinking that it will not be too hot or too cold, and then give it to you with confidence. In my opinion, both kinds of people are kind to you, but the former is like and the latter is love.

17. When everyone thought that my life was rich, I just walked one difficult road after another.

18. Life is always a dilemma. No matter how persistent and unwilling you are, you must learn to accept it in the end. From crying to controlling, to smiling, in the end, this is just a carefree situation. Don't think too much, everything will pass, fidgety mood, lonely life, try useless things.

19. When I like you, I'm sorry that everyone looks like rivals.

20. Some people play with browsed numbers, but still hide their own tuba. Some people use digital year numbers, but he hides a trumpet. Some things that you think are awesome may be in the eyes of others, such as me. Now playing digital garbage, do you really think I don't have a large size? Yes, I have nothing but a number.