How to solve contradictions and disputes

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Follow your heart, you have to tie the bell to solve the problem.

What do you think of others, or you know best. Only by obeying your own heart and being honest with your own heart can you effectively stay away from contradictions and disputes.

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Communicate sincerely, convince people by reasoning, and convince you and the other party.

If you want others to take it orally, you must take it orally first.

Be reasonable and let the other person think from an objective perspective. Understand with reason and move with emotion.

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Improve your self-cultivation, don't call names and hurt people, whoever gets rough first will lose.

Endure a calm moment and take a step back. No matter how much the other person bares his teeth, always keep calm. You must be "reasonable" and not argue irrationally. Otherwise, it will only make the contradiction more and more fierce, and finally cause irreparable consequences. The eyes of the masses are discerning, and everyone knows who is unreasonable to whom. Win the support of the masses and make the other side flinch.

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Don't indulge others blindly, keep a proper distance from others and keep your own framework.

Keep a proper distance between cars to avoid rear-end collision. People are the same, as the saying goes, distance produces beauty, and blindly accommodating will eventually hurt people and themselves, leading to a split lens. Just like hedgehogs keep each other warm, only by keeping a proper distance can we avoid hurting each other. Keep a distance of more than one meter from strangers, so as to make them feel better. Being too close will make the other person feel threatened by the other person, which is called "psychological attack" in psychology.

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If necessary, you should still take up the weapon of law. If you encounter contradictions that you can't solve, you still need to seek legal support. How to mediate contradictions and disputes is the answer to many people's questions. The following are the contents of the methods and skills of conflict mediation carefully recommended by Bian Xiao of Fenfen.com, hoping to help you.

Mediation methods of contradictions and disputes

The cooling method is not to deal with it blindly when contradictions and disputes intensify. It's better to wait for both sides to calm down and calm down before dealing with it. To put it bluntly, it means delaying the processing time.

The method of blending sense and reason is to persuade both sides of the contradiction to think about each other's reasons with emotion. Then both sides of the contradiction take good advice and resolve it according to the situation.

The method of strengthening the body resistance and eliminating evil spirits is to suppress unreasonable contradictions to some extent and inform them of the consequences of going their own way. So as to ensure the promotion and popularity of healthy fashion and convince people.

The case guidance method, through the similar cases handled by itself, guides the contradictory parties to develop in the direction of reconciliation, so as not to make a fuss, and finally embark on an unnecessary road and bring unnecessary trouble to themselves and their families.

Elements that should be paid attention to in mediating civil disputes

Knowing and mastering the five basic elements of civil disputes, such as time, place, person, plot and reason, is the most basic and key skill of mediators.

The first is the skill of using the time element. The time involved in civil disputes includes the following three aspects: the time when the dispute occurred; The duration of the dispute; An opportunity to mediate disputes. The occurrence time of civil disputes often has seasonal laws, which mediators must master to do a good job of prevention. For such disputes with long time, deep estrangement and complicated problems, mediators should be prepared for continuous operation. The timing of dispute mediation refers to the best opportunity for mediation and the opportunity that the mediator grasps well.

The second is the application skills of position elements. Influenced by the living environment and traditional customs, the same civil dispute will show different characteristics in different places. For example, it is also a housing dispute caused by the fact that the house built when building a house is taller than the neighboring home. In developed rural areas, neighbors often have disputes with builders because of the influence of lighting rights, mostly quarrels; In backward rural areas where feudal superstition is serious, neighbors often have disputes with builders because of the influence of geomantic omen, and the probability of fighting is greatly increased. Mediators can only adopt effective mediation methods according to local conditions if they are familiar with the elements of location. The degree of development of disputes in different places will be different.

Third, the application skills of character elements. The subject of the dispute is both sides. Mediation of disputes is actually the mediator's persuasion and persuasion work for both parties. Due to the differences in natural conditions, social experience, cultural quality and moral concepts, everyone has different personality characteristics. Parties with different personality characteristics will have different views on disputes and the work of mediators. For example, extroverts show their feelings, and their inner thoughts will soon be expressed through expressions and behaviors; Introverts have deep feelings, and their inner thoughts are not easy to be seen and put into action. This requires mediators to be good at observing faces and colors, and find out the true thoughts of the parties by analyzing their expressions, words and behaviors.

For another example, people with high education and high legal quality have strong self-regulation ability, and their dispute psychology is not easy to form. Even if it does, it is not easy to externalize into dispute behavior. If such people have disputes with others, they are easy to listen to the mediator's reasoning, and they can also understand the mediator's work and cooperate; On the other hand, people with low education and legal quality have poor self-regulation ability, and dispute psychology is easy to form and externalize into dispute behavior. For the parties to such disputes, mediators must spend more energy to make laws and policies clear and thorough in plain language. For such parties, the usual help and education work and return visit work are very important.

Fourth, the application skills of plot elements. The plot elements of a dispute mainly refer to the real situation in the whole process of the occurrence and development of the dispute. All the facts about the germination, occurrence, development and even intensification of disputes, the excessive language and behavior of both parties in the process of disputes, and even their respective attempts, motives and purposes are the factual basis for mediating disputes. Grasp sufficient factual basis, make preparations, and fight a prepared battle. For the parties who are unreasonable, refuse to admit their debts and are lucky, the mediator can produce true and comprehensive factual evidence, which can shock the parties and urge them to bow their heads and admit their mistakes.

For the parties who have doubts and scruples, the mediator should fully grasp the situation of the dispute in order to win their trust and cooperation. For mediators, only through in-depth and meticulous investigation and mastering these factual basis can we use a variety of mediation methods flexibly in mediation, and then convince both parties to solve disputes smoothly. In-depth investigation is the premise of successful mediation. As the saying goes, there is no right to speak without investigation. Do a good job in mediation, and you can't just listen to one side of the story. Only by in-depth investigation and mastering detailed first-hand information can we mediate confidently and avoid giving people a handle in conversation and putting ourselves in a passive situation.

Fifth, the application skills of causal factors. The cause of the dispute refers to the cause of the dispute, that is, the facts that cause the dispute, including direct and indirect causes, remote causes and near causes. The cause of the dispute is the root of the dispute and the starting point of the mediator's mediation. For a seemingly simple civil dispute, direct cause and indirect cause may coexist, and remote cause and near cause coexist. Generally speaking, direct cause and proximate cause are relatively easy to find out. However, the real causes of disputes are often indirect causes and remote causes hidden behind direct causes and near causes.

This requires mediators to go deep into reality, do meticulous investigation, remove layers of veils and find out the real causes of disputes. Only by grasping the real reason can we completely solve the dispute from the root. Any dispute happens for a reason. Mediators can cut to the chase when mediating, and will not waste time and energy on minor issues.

Principles of mediation and handling of inheritance disputes

1. Men and women enjoy equal inheritance rights.

Influenced by traditional customs, some people still retain the wrong idea of "male transmission and female transmission". Therefore, the concept of equality between men and women should be emphasized in the process of inheritance. Unless the parties voluntarily give up, men and women are equal in inheritance rights. The concrete manifestations are: equal right to inherit property regardless of gender; The share of inheritance of heirs in the same order is equal regardless of gender; The immediate family members of the younger generation with subrogation have the right to the inheritance of subrogation inheritance's father or mother, regardless of gender; When one of the spouses dies, the heir, regardless of sex, has the right to dispose of the estate, and can also decide whether to remarry after inheriting the estate.

2. The old have a sense of security, the young have a sense of security, and the weak have protection.

Children born in wedlock, children born out of wedlock, adopted children and stepchildren who form a foster relationship enjoy equal inheritance rights; When dividing the inheritance, we should pay attention to keeping the share of the fetus' inheritance, take care of the heirs who have special difficulties or lack the ability to work and have no source of income, and divide the inheritance more for the elderly and minors who live with the decedent; In testamentary succession, even if the testator does not keep the share of the inheritance of the fetus or the heirs who lack the ability to work and have no source of income, they should be given inheritance distribution. This not only reflects the protection of the weak by socialist laws, but also contributes to social harmony and stability.

3. Rights are consistent with obligations.

If the decedent has not made a will or concluded a bequest and support agreement, his estate shall be treated as legal inheritance. The specific scheme of legal succession is actually a presumption, which can best reflect the will of the decedent and reflect the general social evaluation. Among them, those who have more obligations to the decedent should get more inheritance. Widowed daughter-in-law and widowed son-in-law who have done their main duty to support their parents-in-law can become the first-order legal heirs and enjoy the first-order inheritance right; When distributing the inheritance, the heirs who have made the main support obligations to the decedent or lived with the decedent can get more points; Heirs who have the ability and conditions to support, but have not fulfilled their obligations to support, shall not be divided or scored less; More people besides heirs who support the decedent can get proper inheritance; When the heir inherits the estate, he shall first pay off the debts of the decedent; If the supporter of the legacy maintenance agreement fails to perform the maintenance obligations, he shall not enjoy the right to be bequeathed. The implementation of the principle of consistency of rights and obligations reflects the orientation of national public policy, encourages the formation of a good atmosphere for supporting the elderly, and is conducive to protecting the legitimate rights and interests of the elderly.

4. Give full play to the legacy.

The division of heritage should be conducive to the needs of production and life, without damaging the utility of heritage. An estate that is not suitable for division may be disposed of by way of discount, appropriate compensation or joint ownership. When there is a dispute between the parties, the mediator can provide a win-win solution for all parties, promote the timely and full use of the heritage, and help to reach a mediation solution quickly.