After breaking up, my ex-boyfriend sent a wechat to scold me, which was very ugly. A few days after breaking up, I found a new lover. He sent a message to scold me. Why?

After a girlfriend breaks up, most men will choose to save their love. They often try their best to please each other, or take the form of stalking and swearing, hoping that their girlfriends will be moved by them and then come back to them. But many times, the other party is unwilling to get back together and even shows a very resistant attitude.

In the face of this dilemma of saving love, how should you break through? Presumably this is the answer that many depositors want to know. Today, I want to talk to you about how you should recover from your girlfriend who is resisting getting back together.

If you are on the road to recovery, and you still don't get better after a lot of efforts, you can learn from other people's successful rehabilitation experience. Recommended article: (Wang Lingling's successful recovery experience) is the story of a girl named Wang Lingling who successfully recovered her long-distance boyfriend, which can whiten her skin.

1 used for emotional "freezing"

Many depositors feel that after making up their minds to save, they should make a quick decision. Before the other person has forgotten himself, he should take immediate action to save it, otherwise it will be too late to save it after the other person's feelings for him have faded.

If it is a fake breakup, this idea is still correct, but if it is a real breakup, this method will undoubtedly push your relationship to a dead end.

You broke up because there are some irreconcilable contradictions between you, which you can't solve immediately. Imagine that you can't solve these abilities, and you run to tell each other that you can change and give them happiness. Do you think the other person will believe you? The answer is obvious. Therefore, after you make up your mind to save it, the first thing you have to do is not to find each other, but to "freeze" emotionally.

This kind of freezing is divided into two aspects, one is the freezing of one's own feelings. This kind of freezing is to calm yourself down, think about the contradictions in feelings, and find out the root cause of breaking up, so as to prescribe the right medicine. In addition, reduce your sense of need, and the other party will not be more wary of you.

On the other hand, it is also the freezing of mutual feelings. This kind of freezing is to prevent your feelings from deteriorating, to "save" your emotional state at that time, and then use time and your actual behavior to reduce your contradictions, so that the other party's resistance to reunification will be reduced.

Step 2 cultivate self-attraction

Emotion, to put it bluntly, is something around attraction. Just like when you first fell in love with each other, you are very attractive, and the other person will naturally be attracted to you. This is the so-called "flowers bloom and butterflies come". You can get more feelings than chasing each other to share your feelings and strengthen your attraction.

But from the moment you break up, your previous attraction is of no value to each other. It may even be counterproductive. Don't say "she likes me like this". She said this when you were in love, and the object was you at that time, not you now. You can't confuse.

Therefore, when redeeming, I suggest that the redeemer choose the method of "secondary attraction" for redeeming. To do this, you must first jump out of your comfort zone and get in touch with new things outside. Don't think you are fine now. If you are good enough, the other party will not choose to leave you. The other person's breakup is actually telling you the fact that you are no longer attractive to her, or that you have no value of being loved.

Secondly, you should reform yourself. The transformation here is divided into external and internal. Externally, your new look can give people a bright feeling and make her subconsciously feel that you have changed. After that, your inner self has also changed, for example, your personality has become better, you are more experienced in dealing with people or you are more comfortable with each other.

At this time, you have a certain attraction to her, and her attitude will naturally not be as resistant as when she just broke up. Therefore, you have more room for recovery.

Tutor's message: It is normal for women to refuse to get back together after breaking up, but this does not determine the success or failure of recovery. If a man wants to save his ex-girlfriend, he must hold his breath, improve himself in the emotional freeze and strive to create a second attraction.