Selected 69 inspirational and funny sentences

1. The impulse of time, the crisis of descendants!

2. People die after spending time, and debts are even more romantic!

3. Nonsense is interpersonal relationships The first sentence.

4. If you have money, you will spend money; if you have no money, you will worship God.

5. People, it is better to live beautifully than to look beautiful!

6. This is the difference between celebrities and ordinary people.

7. It’s not that I was careless, but that I did it on purpose!

8. The effect of contraception: if it fails, you will become an adult!

9. Your dad How nice it would be for my mother to use those 10 minutes to take a walk!

10. Shouting loudly: My disease is finally cured!

11. I still have a lightning comb on my bombarded head. hairstyle.

12. Celebrities said: Everyone was shocked, so philosophical!

13. Ordinary people said: Everyone scolded you, calling you a fool!

14 , instead of planting grass to let people lie on it, why not plant cacti instead!

15. As a model of failure, you are so successful

16. Love your country, love your family, and love your junior sisters. Guard against thieves and thefts, brother.

17. I am not a casual person! But if I am casual, I am not a human being!

18. If you like cheating so much, why don’t you dance ballet?

19. When you go to work, you must carry forward the spirit of a dead pig who is not afraid of boiling water!

20. The early bird catches the worm, and the early bird catches the worm!

21. If a woman shows herself to be generous first, then a man will not dare to be stingy.

22. Pushing your limits, these four words can describe you completely.

23. Asking you how much sorrow you can have is like a group of eunuchs going to a brothel.

24. The only difference between me and Superman is that I wear underwear inside!

25. Life cannot be like cooking, where you have to prepare all the ingredients before cooking.

26. Anyone can become vicious, as long as you try to be jealous.

27. Summer is just not good. When I was poor, I couldn’t even drink the northwest wind.

28. People without medical insurance or life insurance should not act bravely after dark...

29. As a monster, my desire is to destroy at least one Ultraman.

30. No matter how happy a bachelor is, he will get married sooner or later. Isn’t happiness permanent?

31. When I think about a problem, the left side of my head is filled with flour and the right side is filled with water.

32. Now you are looking for Prince Charming, you are out, now you are looking for Prince BMW.

33. If being handsome can be eaten, then my handsomeness can feed 1.3 billion people.

34. Life is like a cup of tea. It will not be bitter for a lifetime, but it will always be bitter for a while.

35. I looked for her thousands of times in the crowd, but suddenly I looked back and saw that person was at the marriage registration office.

36. Love is like sand in your hand. The tighter you hold it, the faster it flows away.

37. The difference between humans and pigs is that pigs are always pigs, while humans are sometimes not humans!

38. Humans are like grains of sand, burying each other, and finally come out. It became a mess!

39. Lei Feng did not leave his name when he did good deeds, but he recorded everything in his diary.

40. I have obviously forgotten it, but always inadvertently, a picture makes my heart aching.

41. When looking at beautiful women on the street, if you look high, you are appreciative; if you look low, you are a gangster.

42. I allow you to enter my world, but I will never allow you to come in and out of my world.

43. As long as people are separated, no matter how familiar they are, they will gradually become alienated.

44. An iron pestle can be ground into a needle, but a wooden pestle can only be ground into a toothpick. If the material is wrong, no matter how hard you try, it will be useless.

45. It is best not to miss two things in life: the last bus home and a person who loves you deeply.

46. Time is the best teacher, but unfortunately - in the end he killed all his students.

47. If you don’t take a day off on Saturday, you’ll get a day stolen; if you don’t take a day off on Sunday, you’ll get a whole day stolen. It will never stop, the body can be collected...

48. Please read aloud:: Lying on the plum blossoms and smelling the flowers, lying on the branches, the sadness is low.

Invite to hear that the rocks are broken, and the dampness reaches the spring green.

49. God decides who your relatives are. Fortunately, it leaves you leeway in choosing friends.

50. There is an old legend that says that those who see beautiful women on the Beijing University of Posts and Telecommunications campus will live forever.

51. With a hot heart, you can change the outcome. With money, you can change this result at will.

52. People are wandering in the rivers and lakes in despair, unable to distinguish between east, west, north and south. I bumped into a corner and didn't realize it, lying on the ground counting stars!

53. Is it sad when someone leaves and the tea is cold? No! What is really sad is: when someone leaves, they also cheated me of my teacup.

54. Boys must be poor, otherwise they will not know how to struggle; girls must be rich, otherwise they will be kidnapped with a few flowers.

55. To like someone means to be happy together; to love someone means to want to be together even if you are unhappy.

56. When pain comes, don’t always ask: “Why me?” Because you haven’t asked this question when happiness comes.

57. In the world, we do not lack a friend to talk to, but we long for a partner who understands and understands us.

58. If prices continue to rise like this, it will be more economical and convenient to carry some dime notes with you instead of carrying paper when going to the toilet.

59. For those who always like to talk about how things were in the past, our boss said: "You used to wear crotchless pants, do you still wear them now?"

60. The biggest thing in life The sadness is not that you can’t get or lose something, but that you don’t know what you want.

61. You have to figure out the script of your life - it is not a sequel to your parents, not a prequel to your children, and not a sequel to your friends.

62. The more you learn, the more you know. The more you know, the more you forget. The more you forget, the less you know. Why learn?

63. The same bottle of drink costs 3 yuan in a convenience store and 60 yuan in a five-star hotel. In many cases, a person's value depends on his location.

64. Don’t always use your identity as a commoner to tell me the story of the 2B society! No matter how awesome you are, why can’t Baidu search for you? No matter how strong you are, can you hold back your urine?

65. One day, a mother-in-law was riding in a car... She didn't know the road halfway through the ride... She hit the driver with a stick and said: Where is this? The driver said: This is my penis...

66. The most beautiful thing about most women is their eyes, the most sexy thing is their lips, and the most fashionable thing is their hairstyle... Of course, the most beautiful thing is the face of a few women.

67. If the best-selling product of the year is "salt", then the best-selling product of the year is "cups". During the New Year, the most popular thing is to put salt in cups...

68. Family Shunzhi, life Kangxi, character Yongzheng, career Qianlong, everything is happy, future is bright, wealth is abundant, internal and external governance, Qianqiu Guangxu, everyone proclaims his unification!

69. Although you have toothy teeth! Don’t feel sorry for yourself, toothy teeth are good! You can dig sweet potatoes with toothy teeth, cover your chin when it rains, separate tea leaves when drinking tea, and use it for picnics. When you are a knife and fork, do you think having big teeth is a bad thing?