Jokes: Sorry, I just got lost!

1. Speaking of the five characters in Journey to the West, when it comes to Tang Monk, Sun Wukong is the most powerful in terms of martial arts; in terms of handsomeness, White Dragon Horse is the most handsome; in terms of speaking ability, Zhu Bajie is the best speaking; in terms of honesty, Monk Sha is the most honest . So here comes the question: Why do all the women have a soft spot for Tang Monk when passing through the Kingdom of Women?

2. The man had been working in Shenzhen for three years and had not returned home. His wife was so bored at home late at night that she picked up her mobile phone and sent her husband a letter home. A letter from home to my husband, The wasteland in front of the door has dried up. If you don't come back within three days, you will rent it to others to grow mushrooms. Her husband received a WeChat message from his wife and immediately replied: A letter from home to my wife, but the land in front of the door cannot be approved. He will return within three days, watering and plowing all night long. After my wife received the message, she immediately replied: We have been separated for three years. Is Plowshare the same as before? If your plow is not strong enough, you will still find barren fields when you come back! My husband immediately replied after receiving the message: Although they have been separated for three years, there is still land in Shenzhen. My plow is as good as before, and when the dry fields are plowed, springs spring out of them.

3. The girl suddenly let out a painful scream: "Ah, what are you doing? It hurts me!" The boy looked ashamed: "Dear, no... I'm sorry, I just I accidentally got lost! ”

4. Suddenly the dog at home ran in while I was taking a bath. I saw that it was dirty so I just washed it together, but the bad guy took advantage of me when I was gone. I licked my asshole... Later I forgave it. I thought it was like licking the lid of the cup when drinking yogurt!

5. When there is a pretty girl sitting next to me on the high-speed train, I try to make my conversation and behavior more elegant and appear to be well-informed. When the conductor passed by, I asked for two cups of coffee. I said to the girl, "Do you mind if I buy you a cup of coffee?" The girl nodded shyly. After the coffee was served, the girl asked me: "Don't you want sugar cube creamer?" I smiled elegantly: "No, I brought Lao Ganma!"

6. One day my mother asked me : Does your girlfriend have scars on her body? On the chest or thighs? I answered casually with the food in my mouth: No. My mother immediately turned back to my father and said: Our pig is overtaking the cabbage.

7. In high school, there were many motivational speeches for students. The ultimate goal was to get you to buy his book, which made people annoyed. Once, our school invited an uncle who was very emotional on stage: "Think about your mother's withered hands, wrinkled eyes, increasingly sallow cheeks, and thin shoulders. Do you still have the heart to hurt her?" Suddenly, A child behind broke out and shouted: "That's why your mother is so ugly!"

8. One day, the three bandit brothers met a beautiful woman on the road and fell in love with her. Afterwards, the three brothers left with satisfaction. The next day, the third bandit met the beautiful woman again and robbed her again. On the third day, the third bandit met the beautiful woman again. When the third bandit was about to rush out, he was pulled by the boss and the second kid. The third kid looked at the dark eyes of the boss and the second kid, and finally pulled the boss and the second kid. He rushed out and robbed her again. On the fourth day, the boss was smoking a cigarette, sitting on a stone, looking at the beautiful woman standing on the wide road, and said: Brother, please retreat, I suspect she has set her sights on us!

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