A few funny text messages, funny. If you are excellent, you will get extra points.

Do you know that?/You know what? I really want to take you out to experience the charm of KTV! Do you know what KTV is? Then k stands for you, t stands for you, and finally I'll make a V gesture!

I saw you the other day. You are very uncomfortable sitting in the sun. I asked you what you were doing, and you smiled mysteriously: keep your voice down, and no one will call me an idiot when I get tanned!

A group of male hippos risked being eaten by crocodiles and crossed the river to woo the female hippos. After crossing the river, they found that all of them were castrated by crocodiles, and only one survived. The only one explained that you are so stupid. You are all breaststroke, and I am backstroke.

A clean and beautiful pig wears a bow around its neck. It jumped in front of you, looked at you adoringly and sang a song for you-I want to be you when I grow up!

An ant and a white rabbit were walking in the forest when they suddenly met an elephant. The ant burrowed into the soil and stretched out a leg.

The little white rabbit was curious and asked, What are you doing?

The ant whispered to it:

Shh ... don't make a sound, and watch me trip it to death. ! ! !

(2) A patient who had an operation for the first time anxiously said to the doctor, "I'm scared. This is my first operation. " The doctor said I was more afraid: "This is my first operation, too."

(3) Once upon a time, a man named A Shuang died. On the day of the funeral, A Shuang's family cried painfully: A Shuang ... A Shuang ... A Shuang.

A passerby passed by here, and the passerby was puzzled: everyone is dead. What are you happy about?

Hearing this question, A Shuang's family felt even worse when they lost their voices: Shuang, ... cool ... cool ... cool ... cool ... cool ... cool.

Xiao Ming saw a lump of poop on the ground and went up to smell it.

Put a little in your hand and taste it in your mouth. It seems to be poop. He said happily, "It's a good thing I didn't step on it."

5] The centipede was bitten by a snake and sent to the hospital for emergency treatment. After the doctor diagnosed, he said: In order to prevent the spread of virus liquid, it must be amputated!

The centipede thought: fortunately, I have many legs!

The doctor consoled: relax, brother, you will be an earthworm in the future.

[6] Motorcyclists like to wear clothes backwards, that is, buckle their buttons behind them to keep out the wind. One day, he drove under the influence of alcohol, overturned and fell headlong on the side of the road.

When the police arrived, ...

Policeman A: What a terrible car accident.

Policeman B: Yes, I hit my head in the back.

Officer A: Well, he's still breathing. Let's help him turn his head back.

Policeman B: OK ... One, two, push, turn around.

Officer A: Well, I'm not breathing. ....

Once a college student was caught by the enemy. The enemy tied him to a telephone pole and asked him, where are you from? I'll electrocute you if you don't tell me!

The college student replied to the enemy's words and was electrocuted. He said, I'm from TV University!

Q: What do you like about me? A: I like you to stay away from me!

The man riding a white horse is not necessarily a prince, he may be a Tang priest; Not necessarily an angel with wings-mother said it was a bird man.

I only say three words! Including the above sentence! I've had enough.

Small and incompetent, famous god, posthumous title Jesus, English famous god, Dharma number Tathagata.