Joke Collection Website - Public benefit messages - What are the classic short messages? Nothing new?

What are the classic short messages? Nothing new?

▲ Please read aloud: lying plum smells fragrant flowers, and lying branches hurts and hates low. Invited to smell the wet rubble lying in the spring green.

▲ I've always wanted to say something to you, but you know its weight. Once I say it, I may not even be a friend, but I can't control my feelings! Now I summon up courage to say to you: When will you invite me to dinner?

▲ Hope: the leader follows you, the car lets you, the money sticks to you, the court dotes on you, the official transportation accompanies you, the school lets you, the real estate is whatever you want, and the lover loves you!

▲ Men are twenty Pentium, thirty Microsoft, forty Panasonic and fifty Lenovo.

▲ Being single is understanding, falling in love is wrong, breaking up is awakening, getting married is wrong, divorce is awakening, remarriage is stubborn, no lovers are waste, and more lovers are animals.

▲ My first love, goodbye infatuation. Take pains to win people's hearts all day. I took great pains to urge my heart. Don't you understand my heart!

▲ If you blink your eyes, I will die. If your eyes blink again, I will come back to life. Your eyes keep blinking, so I will die!

▲ I ran into you and was at a loss. I can't avoid your affectionate eyes. I know your heart. I ran as fast as I could, but you followed me closely. I cried, "Whose dog is nobody's business?"

◆ Do you know? I have been secretly in love with you, missing your face, your lips, your tongue and your ears, but I am too poor to confess. Now that I have money, I can say loudly, "Boss, cut that pig head in half for me."

Honey, you know what? You have lost a lot of weight recently! I see it in my eyes, but it hurts in my heart. It's almost the Spring Festival, but your health is worrying ... who doesn't want to let their pigs kill a few kilograms more!

◆ A public toilet couplet: heroes all over the world bow their heads and bend their knees here; A virtuous woman, a virgin in the world, came in to untie the bandwidth skirt; Horizontal criticism: the meaning of heaven and earth

● Director: Hello, comrades! Soldier: Hello, sir! The chief patted a soldier's chest and said, how well this muscle is trained! Soldier: Sir, I'm a female soldier.

▲ I wrote your name in the sky, but it was taken away by the wind; Write your name on the beach, but it is swept away by the waves; Write your name in the street, but I was taken away by the police

▲ Send you a snack: first floor, considerate! Second floor, care! Third floor, romantic! Fourth floor, warm! Sandwiches, great! I wish you a good mood every day!

◆ The New Year is coming, I wish you smooth sailing, two dragons take off, three sheep open Thailand, four seasons of peace, five blessings, 66 Datong, seven stars shining high, money from all directions, 99 in one, perfect.

I wish you good health and all your teeth fall out. Bon voyage, missing halfway; Go the whole way, give up halfway; Happy every day, often abnormal; Laugh often, laugh anyway!

Any quarrel is the last word a woman says, and anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new war.

A successful man can earn more money than his wife spends, and a successful woman can successfully find such a man.

A woman marries a man in the hope that he will change, but he doesn't. A man marries a woman, hoping that she won't change, but she will.

All princes began to live in seclusion, and all women saw were white horses.

Beauty is the bliss of eyes, the hell of soul and the purgatory of wallet.

Are you off duty now? You must be very busy these days. Pay attention to rest and don't be too tired. For example, don't read this message.

The star that can't be picked is always the brightest, the fish that slips away is always the cutest, the missed movie is always the best, the lost lover is always the most beloved, and the friend who is watching the mobile phone is always my most cherished!

What is pride? Cow. What is modesty? Pretend. What is thrift? Let's go What is cleverness? Blow. What is a friend? You Then who is the cutest? Me. What is happiness? Send text messages to harass you!

Missing you is a common thing, missing you is a daily thing, dreaming about you is a nightly thing, loving you is a lifelong thing, and it is only a matter of time before cheating you.

The cause does not need to be earth-shattering and successful; Friendship doesn't need sweet words, just think about it; Money is not necessarily inexhaustible, as long as it is enough; The body does not need to be a hundred years old, and health is good; You don't need many friends, just you.

Life is a miracle, fate is an accident, happiness is expectation, happiness is a state of mind, and lovesickness is a kind of helplessness. Knowing you as a bosom friend is God's love!

The happiest thing in life is the Chinese New Year (once a year), the happiest thing is getting married (once in a lifetime), the happiest thing is winning the lottery (once in a blue moon), and the happiest thing is knowing you (unparalleled).

A touch of sincerity is better than gold, and a greeting brings warmth and sweetness. Although you and I are sparse or dense, short messages let us contact each other. I hope there is a message that can spread my sincere wishes: peace-auspiciousness-ruyi-happiness!

Don't ignore tenderness because of too much busyness, and don't drown enjoyment because of too many pursuits; Work is not the whole of life, infinite scenery is in the depths of the soul; Stop your hurried steps and don't forget to enjoy the good blessings of life.

Meeting is a melodious song. Knowing each other is a glass of wine, and getting along with each other is a swallow flying south. Knowing each other is Gu Teng. I will always think of you when I have nothing to do. My bosom friend, I wish you happiness every day: happiness forever.

May you be happy every day for 365 days a year, 8760 hours forever, 5256000 wonderful minutes and 3 1536000 seconds.

If one day, you are too tired to walk, as long as you turn around, my blessing will be by your side, no matter how far it is, no matter how many years it takes, turn this blessing into a blue star and shine in the morning and evening, forever.

What is happiness? Happiness = a house+two people+three-point lighting+four-point romance+five-point expectation+six-point care+seven-point tolerance+eight-point love+nine-point cherish+very true feelings and infinite tenderness, I hope you will have it as soon as possible.

It would be a pity if no one cared about the beautiful days! Perhaps blessing is just a form, but it can bring warmth to the soul, so we all send each other care, the same tone on the same day, I hope you can be happy!

The best wine is not necessarily the most expensive bottle, because the wine you can buy can't buy the mood. The best friend may not be the one who contacts you the most, but the one who remembers you on a special day!

When you are in a bad mood, you can say to yourself in the mirror, "I am beautiful, I am really beautiful" so that you will feel better! ! But don't do this kind of thing often, because lying often is not good.

If your mobile phone is not waterproof, be careful not to drool on it when reading short messages, or it will break!

I hope that when we meet again, it will be at the doctoral graduation ceremony of Harvard University. You and I are very excited, shake hands with each other. You said: Congratulations on your doctorate! I also said: look at other places, all the cans here have been picked up.

Yesterday, I dreamed of God, who said he could grant me a wish. I took out my globe and said I wanted world peace. He said it was too difficult to change. I took out your photo and said I wanted this person to look good. On reflection, he said that I would take another look at the globe.

One day, I went on an adventure with you and met a troll. He smells you first, then smells me, and then chooses to eat me. I thought it was unfair, so I asked him why. He said it belonged to the Hui people!

It is said that meteors are responsive! I would like to wait under the starry sky until a star is touched by me, breaking the silence of the night sky for me, and then let it fall on your sleeping pillow with my blessing and crush you to death ~! ! !

Sunrise+sunset = morning and evening, moon+stars = infinite yearning, wind flowers+snowy moon = tenderness, meteor+words = blessing, you+charcoal fire-that is roast suckling pig.

Lonely? Do you want to go on holiday? Please call 1 10 for free to win 14 days' stay in the detention center and a free tour by police car. Now you will get a pair of exquisite handcuffs, a fashionable prison uniform and a free shave for the top ten.

It's over. I almost miss you. My eyes are blue at midnight. I forgot to give money when I bought something. I don't want to eat pork stewed vermicelli. 1+ 1=3 feels difficult. Zhao Benshan is regarded as Sun Nan, and the crying RMB is beautiful!

Chimpanzees accidentally stepped on the bench pulled by gibbons, who cleaned it gently and carefully. Later, the two fell in love, and some people asked how they got together. Chimpanzees said with emotion: ape dung! It's all ape shit!

I looked at your sexy body that day, twisted naked in front of me and gently stroked your skin. I can't resist your temptation: boss, I want this fish!

You are happy because I am happy, I am happy because you are happy, I am sad because you are thin, I am thin because you are sick, I smile because you are strong, and I am rich because I sold you. .................................................................................................

That night, I held you in my arms and told you to put that thing on your ear. It's cool that you don't wear it. It's a safe period now, nothing ... what should the traffic police do without a helmet?

When you left me silently, I was in pain and didn't know what to do. I hate myself when I watch your back go away. It's all my fault ... I got up early and caught the bus.

Do you know that?/You know what? Do you know that?/You know what? I miss you every day and every night. I want to eat, sleep and work. I really want to tell you to pay back the money quickly.

I really love you and I don't want to leave you. You got me into such a deep hole that it hurts me. If you really don't want to upset me, please hurry up ... the stock market.

The first time I saw you, I said to myself: You are my goal in this life. I want to pursue you and hug you. I want to announce: I love you ... RMB.

Life becomes uncomfortable without you. I hate that hateful third party for taking you away. Do you have a new relationship with him? I really want you to come back to me-wallet

Don't ask me why I am crying, my tears flow for you and my heart is broken for you. I hate that man, why did he take you away from me ... thief.

I have been by your side, worrying about you again and again. Are you full today? Did you sleep well? Will it be cold late at night? I always knew you couldn't take care of yourself. Every time I walk away, you jump out of the pigsty.

You flashed by, making my blood boil and my heart surge. Looking at your back, I really want to keep you. I told myself, I can't let you leave again, and I will never … catch thieves again!

In the vast sea of people, my heart is broken for you. You seem indifferent, but you make me feel boring. Your indifference makes me afraid to confess, but I can't extricate myself. Now I want you to understand ... you are stepping on my foot.

These days, I've been trying to say three words to you, but I'm afraid even ordinary friends can't do it, so I can't help it. I still want to say: borrow some money!

It is said that the earliest love poem was written like this: You are from Yuanmou, Yunnan, and I am from Zhoukou, Beijing, holding your furry little hand, ah! It is love that makes us walk upright!

Every girl is an angel with broken wings for love. When they come to earth, they will never return to heaven, so men must cherish it. I am an angel ~ really! It's just that when I came to earth, I accidentally fell on my mouth and chewed on the mud, so the weight problem can't go back to heaven. Fortunately, I still have an angel's heart, kind and kind. ...

Know what I'm doing? Give you five choices: A, miss you B, miss you C, miss you D, miss you E, all of the above.

If you receive this message, you just like me. If you delete it, you have a crush on me If you reply to the message, you just want to marry me. If you don't, you promise to marry me. If you modify it, it will be mine. If you save it, the rest of your life will be mine! It's up to you

Valentine's Day wish: Be a koala and sleep on a big eucalyptus tree. I am a koala and you are a eucalyptus. Amen! ! Stick to you all my life, love you and need you! ! !

Feeling for you is a simple natural index. You can differentiate it several times, and it will remain the same ... you can also integrate it if you want, but there will be an extra constant, which is equal to-I love you.

Ah! I accidentally sent you "I love you" by mistake. If you accept it, keep it. If you don't accept it, send these three words back to me.

Weather forecast: I sometimes miss you from morning till day, and then it becomes a wild dream in the afternoon. My mood is expected to drop by five degrees. Affected by the prolonged low pressure area, it is expected that this weather will continue until I see you.

It is easy to love and be loved, but it is difficult to fall in love, just like cats always want to be close to fish, and fish never think so.

Perhaps, in your life, I was just an accident, and in my case, you are the greatest miracle.

Friend: Please remember! If you can't get the roses, I'll get them for you! If you can't finish your chocolate, I'll help you eat it! Happy Valentine's Day!

Everything can be washed away except tears, and that is time. The longer the time, the weaker the conflict, just like tea that is constantly diluted.

Thirty years later, if there is still the word persistence in the world, I hope it belongs to me; Thirty years later, if there is still the word moved in the world, I hope it belongs to you. ...

I want you to know that there is someone in this world who will wait for you forever. No matter when and where, you know there will always be such a person.

I want to kiss you, not long, just for life.

There are always times when I quietly avoid it for love. What I avoid is the figure, but what I can't avoid is the silent feelings. ……

If you want to cry one day, call me. I can't promise to make you laugh, but I can cry with you!

I must make you the second happiest person in the world-because with you, I am already the happiest person!

The fish said to the water, you can't see my tears because I am in the water. Water says I can feel your tears because you are in my heart.

The furthest distance in the world is not the ends of the earth, but when I am by your side, you don't know that I love you!

Like is a touch of love. Love is deep love. I hope we can go home together instead of sending you home in the future.

If I don't propose to you, I will regret it all my life, because you are the only one for me.

Some words … you want to say but don't want to say … when you summon up courage, you don't have a chance to say them; There are some things you want to say, but you don't feel the need to say them right away, but when you want to say them, you can't remember them.

The dull life I gradually adapted to made me forget how to cry. Maybe all my tears were delivered to you, but what I left for myself was endless thoughts and memories. For a long time, no one can enter my heart again, and I can shed a tear for him happily. Happiness or regret, tears will embellish!

I don't know what to say, but I suddenly miss her at that moment.

I've been wondering if it will be love at first sight at the age of 27.

Do you know that I love you irretrievably? ...

Some people, who can't meet each other in this life, are lonely, met or lonely. ...

I love you for no reason. Not because you are like me, nor because you are just the opposite of me. It's not a psychological compensation, it's not what advantages or conditions you have, nor how you treat me. Don't ask me why I love you. If I can answer, those reasons will only be remembered afterwards.

Love always has regrets. It's not just moonlight

You beautiful and lovely bird, where are you taking my heart?

If I had an extra ticket, would you go with me?

I don't know if she will win if the relationship can be divided, but I know very well that I lost from the beginning.

Even if I fall into the darkest place, my love will not make me a lonely soul forever.

Life is full of coincidences, and two parallel lines will intersect one day.

The love line, lifeline and career line in my hand are all spelled out by your name.

Everyone is born only half, and walking in the world is to find the other half. Some people are lucky and find it soon. Some people have to find it all their lives. ...

I love you ... I am willing to give up everything-including you-for your happiness.

The creator saw that a man was too lonely, so he took off one of his ribs while she was sleeping and created a woman. Every man spends his whole life learning to find the rib he left behind, because only by finding her will his chest not feel dull pain. ......

Don't be so nice to me. You are so kind to me. If one day you treat me badly, I will be very sad.

Actually, knowing someone doesn't mean anything. People change. Today he likes pineapple, and tomorrow he can like something else. "

When I was a child, I looked at the stars all over the sky, but I never had time to make a wish when meteors flew by. It's still too late to meet someone you like when you grow up.

Lovely you stole my love and my heart. I've decided to sue you in court. What should I sentence you to? The judge searched all criminal records and cases, and finally the jury unanimously passed: I sentence you to be mine for life.

Love makes people forget time, and time also makes people forget love.

Loneliness is not innate, but starts from the moment you fall in love with someone.

If I don't love you, I won't miss you, I won't be jealous of the opposite sex around you, I won't lose confidence and fighting spirit, and I won't suffer. If only I couldn't love you.

Like a person, there is no pain. It may be a long pain to love someone, but the happiness he gives me is also the greatest happiness in the world.

I felt very sad when I stood in front of the waterfall. I always feel that there should be two people standing here.

Let me be buried in your ancestral grave!

Do you want to marry me in this life or in the next?

The rice is in the pot and I am in bed.

why

"We put down our dignity, personality and stubbornness just because we can't let go of one person. 』

happy

"Like a person, there will be no pain. It may be a long pain to love someone, but the happiness he gives me is also the greatest happiness in the world. 』

modest

"Love is very humble, very humble, if the other party doesn't love you. 』

painful

"People who bring you happiness can also bring you pain. 』

disappointed

"Disappointment is sometimes a kind of happiness, because there is expectation, so we will be disappointed, because there is love, there will be expectation, so even if we are disappointed, it is also a kind of happiness, although this happiness is a bit painful. 』

Have a crush on sb

"Unrequited love is sacred and needs to rely on each other's happiness. If there is pain, keep it for yourself. 』

love

"It's hard to love someone, and it's even harder to give up the person you love. 』

forget

"If you can't forget him, then don't forget him. True forgetfulness requires no effort. 』

companion

"I just want to find a shoulder that can bear my tears when I am frustrated and give me a bite when I am happy. 』

year

"As time goes by, we forget that we once loved a person without attachment, forgot his gentleness, and forgot everything he did for me. I have no feelings for him. I no longer love him. Why is this happening? It turns out that our love lost to time. First love makes you forget time, then time makes you forget love. 』

disadvantaged

"I don't know what advantages he has, but he has a big shortcoming ... I know he doesn't love me. Isn't this shortcoming big enough? " 』

If I were a tear in your eyes, I would like to slide down your face to your lips because I really want to kiss you; If you were a tear in my eyes, I would never cry in my life, because I am afraid of losing you.