Can't a boy who doesn't return your text messages be redeemed?

Many women, after being broken up, don't want to fall in love, or want to continue with their boyfriends, so they keep texting him and even have suicidal thoughts. However, such a crazy approach will often only get the boyfriend's unresponsiveness, and even hate to want to run away from you. In fact, he didn't return your text messages after breaking up, not necessarily because he really didn't like you, but he needed to calm down during this time. Therefore, if you want to save him after breaking up, you must first learn to freeze.

Why should there be emotional freezing after breaking up? Many people don't understand what the freezing period of love is, and even have more or less doubts about the word freezing period. Some people will say that love during the freezing period means that we have cut off contact with each other and there is no possibility of contact. Is this the end of the relationship?

Mr. Connor, an expert in saving love, once said: "Freezing is emotional freezing, and it is definitely not breaking off diplomatic relations." Indeed, when a love is in the freezing period, it is just a kind of emotional freezing between the two sides, which is completely different from the actual breaking off. The freezing period of love is actually to give both lovers an emotional freeze, so that the other party can use this freezing period to reflect on themselves and change themselves, so that this seemingly impossible love can finally be saved because of self-change.

Every couple will inevitably have contradictions, and it is precisely because of contradictions that their feelings have cracked. When love is in crisis, or in the situation of being broken up, I still don't know what to do to save each other. Some people like to importune, constantly contact each other to get each other's dynamics and information, and even focus on each other, completely losing themselves. This is extremely irrational. In fact, at this time, we might as well let each other's feelings enter a frozen period, so that both sides can make good use of this time to reflect and change themselves, reduce their sense of need and give each other time and space. If you are still chasing each other at this time, it will only increase the other party's dislike of yourself, and it will only be futile to save yourself.

Once love enters the freezing period, it is necessary to make the necessary response immediately. Because the freezing period is not the so-called disconnection, but the emotional and linguistic freezing of both sides. Although they have no contact with each other on the surface, they don't know each other's living conditions. Perhaps many people will ask, if love enters the freezing period and some freezing methods are adopted, will it be counterproductive and make the other party think that they have really given up on this relationship and are desperate, even in the end.

Second, establish a correct attitude.

After a relationship breaks down, the other party will want to keep the other party, while maintaining a negative and pessimistic attitude and having no motivation to do things. But in fact, you should put your mind right when you do anything, otherwise you will not be very happy in both the process and the result. Then, on the road of saving love, what kind of mentality should we hold to save each other?

Learn to respect. Self-esteem is the psychological capital for you to do everything well. Only when you know how to respect yourself, only when you respect yourself, can you get a good relationship. People with low self-esteem are often very concerned about the views of the outside world and tend to distort the words and deeds of others and amplify them into their own evaluations. They always think about ordinary things, even beautiful things, in a pessimistic direction. They are used to catering to others and forget to take care of their feelings. This will always automatically become the weak side and end in failure. Learn to accept your imperfections and enhance your charm and value.

Peaceful and objective. What is peace and objectivity? For example, you sent him a WeChat. You looked at your mobile phone over and over again, waiting for his reply, for fear of missing any news, but after waiting for a long time, the other party didn't respond. I will think, does he hate me very much, is he tired of me, and does he want to ignore me? Or are you with another woman now? The more I think about it, the more pessimistic I am, but in fact, the other party is just in a meeting without a mobile phone, that's all. The truth of many things is not what we expected. If you can keep a peaceful and objective attitude to observe, be patient and don't rush to judge, a lot of unnecessary things will be saved. Many things that you think are right actually turn out to be quite different from what you think. Therefore, not being extreme and self-righteous is the best mentality to save.

Freedom. Many people can't accept this fact after breaking up and will keep pestering each other. If I leave him alone, he may forget me. In fact, if the other person is a playboy, if the other person doesn't love you very much from the beginning, if you don't make the other person happy and relaxed enough, it's no use pestering him again, and he may stay away from you!

What if it's another way? I think that giving each other freedom is undoubtedly the best care, which not only contains self-esteem and self-confidence, but also represents trust in each other. I still love you, but you are free. Instead of thinking about how to save each other and pester each other all day, we should spend our time and energy cleaning ourselves up and making ourselves better, richer and more interesting, so as to attract more attention from each other and make our feelings more quality. Those who stand still are doomed to have no result.

Third, you have to edit the text message to save your ex.

If you want to save your boyfriend by texting, the timing of texting must be right. For example, you didn't just break up, and the other person doesn't like you very much; It's not like the other party hacked your WeChat and QQ, so you turned to SMS. If your relationship is stiff and the other person hates you, then at this time, whether you send an apology, explanation, pleading, love message or interesting information, it will have no effect on recovery. Because your behavior will only be classified as one sentence by the other party:

Stalking and beating.

Therefore, the situation written in this article only applies to the situation that the relationship with the ex is good, at least the other party is willing to reply to the text message occasionally. This requires special attention. After all, everyone's emotional experience is different and their emotional state is different. There can be no panacea. Only the right medicine can cure your feelings. This article aims to give you a reference when taking medicine.

(1) What kind of message is easier to reply to?

Not to mention your importance in the other person's mind now, (because if you are important, even if your message is boring, the other person is likely to reply to you. The reality is that information that is harmless, relaxed, stress-free and easy to answer can have a higher response rate. It is an axiom that no one wants to chat with a person who often makes him feel depressed.

Regarding the details of SMS, my suggestion is:

Try to find topics that interest, surprise (not scare) and relax the other person, such as movies, concerts and writers that the other person likes;

Girls can send short messages for help appropriately, without increasing the burden on each other, and praise each other once without leaving a trace;

(2) The skills of short message questioning

On the one hand, before you throw a question, you must have a good reason. For example, if the other person is engaged in the work of outdoor sports leader, and you want to travel 1/month1day, you can ask the other person something about visa or route recommendation by SMS, unless the other person hates you, most of them will reply.

On the other hand, it is better to keep this question simple and not to cross the line. Since you are ordinary friends, don't ask questions beyond the boundaries of friends, especially prying into privacy. Don't ask complicated questions, it's harder to answer. Otherwise, the other party will only find you annoying, not to mention returning your text messages.

(3) If there is a lack of topics and appropriate questions, I would rather not send text messages.

Remedy has always been a "scheming" problem. You should think more and don't let your emotions lead you by the nose. It's the same with texting. If you don't have suitable questions or topics related to the other party, you would rather not move, send nothing, or send short messages that increase the difficulty of recovery.

(4) A quick reply is a good sign, but don't be too pessimistic about a slow reply.

The other party replies to your message, and the "second reply" proves that the other party still cares about you, which is of course a good sign. However, don't be too pessimistic when the other party is slow to respond. Maybe the other person is extremely busy at work, or maybe he/she doesn't want to reply to the text message for the time being at that stage. This doesn't mean that the other person hates you. Instead of paying too much attention to the time of SMS reply, it is better to pay attention to the content of SMS. For example, although he/she replied a little late, he/she didn't answer your question later, which is a good interaction.

Therefore, if you want to save your boyfriend after breaking up, don't use some methods to save each other. It's ok to contact by SMS, but don't put pressure on the other party by bombing, otherwise it will only make the other party breathless and finally want to escape from you.