Let's see if there is such a message in your mobile phone.

You have changed, become so strange, and you are no longer the familiar one in your memory! It breaks my heart to look at your strange face! How can I change from a cute tadpole to a toad?

No matter how high the sky is, how deep the sea is, how hard the steel is, how strong the wind is, how long the feet are, how wide the river is, how strong the wine is, how cold the ice is, how hot the fire is … I just want to tell you that these are none of your business!

I don't know, I just understand its meaning ~ I don't understand, stupid boy. His mobile phone is upside down.

You are as light as the wind, as gentle as water, as hazy as fog, as romantic as the moon, as warm as the sun, as tolerant as the sea, as healthy as an ox, as long as a tortoise and as lovely as a rabbit. In a word, you are not human.

I can't eat in the morning because I miss you. I can't eat at noon because I miss you more. I can't eat at night because I miss you crazily. I can't sleep at night because I'm really hungry!

You have a child named face, and the neighbor has a child named ass. You are sad to lose your front face three years ago. The day before yesterday, you saw your ass playing downstairs. You look at your ass affectionately and say, if my face is still there, it will be as big as my ass!

Miracle appeared: ducks fought; Fish flew into the sky; Cats and dogs form in-laws, and mice are their neighbors; Strange, why didn't I see you in the tree? No ... the pig hasn't changed.

I know you pay attention to hygiene. Wash your hands carefully every time you go to the toilet. Suddenly you stopped washing your hands. I'm surprised: why don't you wash your hands? You answer: I brought paper this time!

Promise me to take good care of myself, no matter what happens, I will be calm, no matter what I do, I will be firm, I will be optimistic whenever and wherever I meet, and I will never tell anyone that you are crazy.

At night, I am naked and desperate to find you. I really can't live without you. Only you can make me comfortable. Where are you at this important moment? I shouted in despair: Mom, there is no soap!

Said You Zhu was fat, lazy and stupid. Why do people always blame pigs for things they don't want to admit? You are furious: stop insulting me. Don't eat pigs if you can.

You see my infatuation, my hospitality, my true love and my doubts in your eyes. What a big piece of shit!

I heard that your mobile phone has no short message function, so I sent this short message as an experiment. If you receive it and confirm that it has SMS function and it is not my SMS, please reply to me: I have it, it is yours!

English tongue twister test: repeat peace-war-discovery three times quickly. Those who are fluent and correct prove that you should find someone worthy of your love. I don't know you and your feelings well enough. I know that some things can't be forced, and some distances can't be exceeded. Just like yesterday, I really can't believe you ran away with someone for a bone! Excellent oral English.

I've been thinking about you a lot lately. I know it's not good, but I'll regret it all my life if I don't tell you what I think. Whatever your decision is, I won't force you. If you are really in trouble, don't pay back the twenty cents!

No matter the ends of the earth, I will follow you closely; No matter the seas run dry and the rocks crumble, I will always be with you. I want to shout out three words to let the world know: please eat!

Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! -I told you it's okay. What are you pressing? Stupid pig!

M_M hi m _) Give me a glad eye (_ * One more.

"My dear, that's very kind of you! Love me, love me, care about me, and make me fat in vain. " "Ha, dear, you forget that I used to be an expert in raising pigs."

In the vast sea of people, when you receive this sincere blessing, please try your best to hit your head against the wall-see? Countless stars in front of you are my infinite concern!

A shadow is lonely, two roses are simple, a star is expectation, two vast skies, one is comfortable, and having you is a mess! The idiot who reads text messages sometimes makes me miss it!

I gently carry you to bed, gently open your pants, gently take off your underwear, gently kiss your face, and then gently say to you: Baby, change your posture-come on-change diapers.

Meeting you is the beginning of my heart; Falling in love with you is my happy choice; Having you is my most precious wealth; Stepping into the red carpet is my eternal motivation. Unfortunately-I sent it to the wrong person.

Being friends with you for so long, you always care about me, but I often give you trouble. I really don't know how to answer you. Therefore, in the next life, if you are a cow and a horse, I will definitely pull weeds for you to eat.

If you were a meteor, I would chase you. If you are a satellite, I will wait for you. If you were a star, I would fall in love with you. Too bad you are an orangutan!

Miss you is a happy thing! Loving you is what I will always do! Keeping you in mind is what I have been doing! However, lying to you is how to return a responsibility!

According to statistics, more than 99.9% people who look like pig heads read short messages with thumb buttons! Hey, hey, don't change hands, it's too late, pig!

I was talking about you with some friends just now. Some people say you look like a cow. Some people say that you are like a sheep; Some people say you are Malik Watergate. To this end, I had a quarrel with them. They have gone too far. Obviously, you are a pig!

You'd better. I miss you again. I'm not angry with you anymore. And I feel that my love for you is deepening every day. That's because someone told me ... the price of piglets has gone up: you are valuable again!

Are you full today? Did you sleep well? Will it be cold at night? I really want to stay by your side quietly. I know you can't take care of yourself. Every time I leave, you jump out of the pigsty.

Honey, you know what? You have lost a lot of weight recently! I see it in my eyes, but it hurts in my heart. It's almost the Spring Festival, but your health is worrying ... who doesn't want to let their pigs kill a few kilograms more!

You are happy, I am happy, you are happy, I am worried because you are thin, my hands are thin because you are sick, I smile because I am strong, and I am rich because I sold you ~ ~ ~ little pig!

If I leave in autumn, I will wait for you in the snow; If the world goes, I will wait for you in heaven; If you leave, I will miss you with tears; If I leave, I will let him take care of you. He raises pigs well, really! "

I want to say goodbye to you. It breaks my heart to see your innocent face. Why do I really choose, but I have to give up in a hurry? I wanted to keep you around, but my mother said, "no pigs in the city!" "

Others say you are stingy, "the needle cuts the iron, the swallow grabs the mud, and the crane cracks the lean meat on the leg."

Where are you? I can't get through. I was so worried! I have something important to see you. When you see the information, go to the epidemic prevention station for physical examination immediately, which is the fastest.

Degree! Here's your chance. You can transfer from a private pigsty to a state-owned pig farm if you pass the medical examination!

My car has no license plate, driver's license, driving license and road maintenance fee ... in short, there is nothing, but I have traveled all over the world.

The rain is unimpeded. Actually, it's nothing, because it's a bike!

I hear you are resourceful and clever. Please steal me from my present room, and I will give you a reward of $654.38 million.

Contact me when you think about it.-Saddam.

One day I was walking in the street, and a beautiful girl came up to me and asked me, "Are you handsome?" I said "no" and she left! Then turn around

He punched me hard and said, "I told you to lie."

Congratulations on getting a white house with a lawn in front. It is located in Washington, the capital of the United States, and its current owner is named Bu.

Well, you can ask him to move out of your house at once!

Miracle appeared: ducks fought; Fish flew into the sky; Cats and dogs form in-laws, and mice are their neighbors; Strange, why?

Didn't you see you in the tree? No ... Pig's still the same?

I tell you an unfortunate news. Last night, the God of Wealth gave me a dream and vowed to haunt you until you begged him for mercy: "There is too much money."

I don't want it anymore. "

In the bathroom, a gentleman frowned, grinned and tried his best. Hey.-finally. Boy, squeezing toothpaste costs

All this time.

When I arrived in xishuangbanna tourism, Yunnan, I was besieged by a group of wild boar. Tourists took out food and money, and the wild boar was unmoved.

You took out your only ID card, and the pigs knelt down and cried, boss, we found you!

Do you remember? You go to the TV station to sing a song, and all four judges fall down. Fortunately, a referee came on stage and hugged you excitedly.

Hands say: talent! It costs money for others to sing, and it is fatal for you to sing.

Ah! You are so elegant and charming. No wonder everyone says you are ... bloated!

Thank you. I really appreciate it． Thank you for your message. Here's 12 thousand gold, plus naked dream man If you want to ask me how to receive the prize,

Go to the toilet on the corner!

The earth is turning, people will change, the sky is blue, the sea is deep, thinking of you is true, love is eternal, and it is impossible to marry you.

Yes, if you have money, we are still destined.

I heard that your mobile phone has no short message function, so I sent this short message as an experiment. If you receive it, make sure there is a short message function, not my short message.

Please reply to me: I have it, it's yours!

You are as light as the wind, as gentle as water, as hazy as fog, as romantic as the moon, as enthusiastic as the sun, as tolerant as the sea and Joy Niu.

Kang, you live as long as a tortoise, and you are as lovely as a rabbit. In short, you are not human!

They say you are a real thing. I said you are a person, not a thing. Good things and bad things are things. A good man like you.

How can it be one thing?

When the clouds pass by, it is the trace that I miss you; That's how I miss you when the light shines; When the rain falls, that's why I miss you

Evidence; When it thundered, that's when I prayed to heaven that you were hit ... haha laughed

You are over 20, there are some things you should know! Days are used for windy and rainy days; The land is used to grow flowers and grass; I

Used to prove how great human beings are. And you are used to stew vermicelli.

You have a bad life, frustrated in the mall, hopeless in love, discredited, and your friends dislike you. How to avoid it? Read it a hundred times in Mandarin:

Woof, woof, woof, woof Keep your voice down, the dog catcher is coming.

If you are a bird in the air, then I am a shotgun. Bang! You fell in my arms, braised! If you are a fish in the water

Then I am the electric fish machine. Cheep! Just float on my chopping block and steam!

You rode a motorcycle, and more than 200 people died when you went up and down the slope. The police came for you, and you ran into the ladies' room. There was no light in the ladies' room, so you dropped it.

When you went into the poop pit, you fought with the poop and almost didn't die!

My dog pulled on the ground. I don't understand. I thought you said you could read it. Please.

Help me translate, thank you!

I heard that your mouse moved and the flies were sent to the hospital. I just met your cockroach in the supermarket to buy a freshener, and the bug bought incense.

! Dude, wash your feet!

Scientists have invented an IQ measuring instrument. You put your head in, and the instrument prompts: Please don't put the wood in! You stick your head in again,

Instrument tip: This piece of wood looks familiar!

You aim the long barrel air gun at the sky, holding the barrel in one hand and pulling the bolt up and down repeatedly in the other, showing a satisfied expression. Others asked.

What are you doing? Just say I masturbate!

Do you know that?/You know what? Do you know that?/You know what? When I finished reading the short message you sent me, I suddenly realized how much affection you used for me! Memory is

How unforgettable! You can't forget me! I finally decided: turn it off and piss you off!

Pigs can't talk, they can only hum songs with their noses. Just like some girls, they always say: Hum!

One donkey can carry one hundred catties of grain, two donkeys can carry two hundred catties of grain, and you only brought three donkeys and brought back four hundred catties of grain.

What?

Do you want to have good teeth? Here are three lessons for you: first, rinse your mouth after meals and brush your teeth in the morning and evening; Second, see a doctor every two years.

Have a dental examination in the hospital; Third, mind your own business.

English tongue twister test: repeat peace-war-discovery three times quickly, and those who are fluent and error-free prove that oral English is excellent.

.

Your voice comes from the valley. I looked down and found you at the corner of the mountain. It is you! It is really you! You are with an old man.

Sorry, I rushed over and said, Grandpa, borrow the donkey.

You were internship in a mental hospital, and suddenly a psycho came after you with a kitchen knife. You turn and run until you die.

Hutong, thought it was over, the patient said, here is your knife. It's your turn to chase me!

Have you started working again? I have told you more than once not to work so hard and pay attention to your health. But you always mean something.

Some people say: If the weather is warm, roll a few dung balls, what will you eat in winter?

I know you pay attention to hygiene. Wash your hands carefully every time you go to the toilet. Suddenly, you didn't wash it. I was surprised:

Why don't you wash your hands? You answer: I brought paper this time!

"I can't put it down" means I like it too much to put it down, so you should say "I can't put it down" to the person you like loudly and try.

You see, a few more shouts will definitely have an effect.

Wow, you think you are an underwear model! If you don't pay attention to the image, don't affect the city appearance. Please wash your hands after sleeping next time.

Why not just zip it up?

Although someone's appearance is only the IQ of a pig, it's not your fault that you are mentally retarded, but you often ask some mentally retarded questions to lower others' IQ.

Your IQ is wrong.

We met over 1000 years ago. It was an autumn. Maybe there are some yellow leaves dancing. You ran away with me in the wind, and now I'm here.

Your tooth marks have been left on your body, which has become an eternal story. At that time, my name was Lv Dongbin.

Drink strong tea until it is tasteless. If you are drunk, you never want to wake up. Pig's trotters should have thick skin and thick meat. Hey, hold hands.

This machine is good!

What happened? Call your mobile phone. Voice prompt: You dialed a lazy pig from other places. Please dial the lazy pig before dialing the number.

I can't believe the circle area code. I dialed it again. Voice prompt: the owner was killed!

On a cold winter morning, you paddle hard in the pool, breaststroke, backstroke, butterfly, freestyle and impressive diving.

! The old man on the shore was anxious: "I'm going to have an exam!" You drank up the cesspool and didn't let me farm! "

Promise me to take good care of myself, no matter what happens, I will be calm, no matter what I do, I will be firm, no matter when.

Be optimistic. No matter who you meet, don't tell him that you are crazy.

At night, I am naked and desperate to find you. I really can't live without you. Only you can make me comfortable. This is very important.

Where the hell are you now? I shouted in despair: Mom, there is no soap!