Poet in the Distance, Eternal Song —— On the Poet and My Companion Tree

Wu (1979—2008), formerly known as Zeng Huankai, is a Hakka from Meixian County, Guangdong Province. Poetry writing began at 1995. 200 1 Enter Zhuhai College of Jinan University. He has published more than 400 poems in Poetry magazine, Stars, Beijing Literature, Selected Poems, Songs, Yangtze River and China Campus Literature (the first). He has won more than ten prose awards such as People's Literature, Tianya, Tian Fei and Poetry Tide. He was selected into more than ten anthologies, such as Best Poetry for College Students in 2003 and Dunhuang Volume in 2004. He was named "20 most dynamic young poets in China in 2007" by Poetry magazine. There is a book of poetry "My Same Tree" published behind me. ...

Speaking of which, I once had a relationship with a poet. This relationship began in September, 200 1 year. At that time, the poet had just entered Zhuhai College of Jinan University, where I happened to teach modern literature and was the head teacher of the poet class, so I had more contact with the poet after class than others. Although my direct contact with the poet was not long, perhaps because of poetry, our friendship did not stop, and it continued from then on until his sudden death.

In retrospect, my association with poets started with teachers and students and ended with friends. It begins with occupation and ends with friendship. On August 1 day, 2008, the sudden departure of the poet made me deeply realize the unspeakable pain brought by the fragility of life, and I couldn't help but feel sorry for the untimely death of a young poet who had shown outstanding talent.

Although I may not be good at poetry creation, as an ordinary reader, I am often moved by the poet's outstanding talent and thus become a loyal reader of his works. It can also be said that the poet's poems conquered me.

one

The first time I met the poet was in September, 200 1 year, the first morning after school started. At that time, I was walking on my way to the classroom with my lecture notes between my arms. Huan Kai greets Lu Yu, and Lu Yu is a little stiff and greets me. We know it's a student in our class. The first impression the poet gave me was that he was thin but smart, his cheeks were tanned by the sun in the south of China, his eyes were very energetic, and maybe he was a little depressed occasionally. Most Guangdong children had sincere and simple expressions on their faces.

In the process of traveling with my colleagues, I casually asked him what publications he usually reads, and Huankai listed several literary magazines including People's Literature and Poetry without thinking. Asked about the impression, he seemed to blurt out impulsively: "Teacher, many works are not as good as mine!" " "My heart thumped. When asked about writing, he seems to be impulsive: "Write a poem almost every day". My heart thumped again, and I could not help secretly marveling at the aggressiveness of this young man.

Maybe I'm a little impulsive, or worried about my misunderstanding. About two days later, Huankai came to my apartment with a thick notebook to show me what he had written in the past. From then on, Huang Kai's poetry creation began to enter my field of vision, which brought me a series of pleasing aesthetic shocks. To tell the truth, Huankai's writing style has a strong artistic charm. I believe that people with a little literary appreciation will immediately feel what literary talent is after reading Huan Kai's words. Almost when I was reading this notebook, Huankai's amazing talent in literary brushwork captured me. I have no doubt that I met a poetic genius.

In fact, because of my personal professional background, there are not a few poets' poems that slip by my eyes, and because of my professional behavior, I have to make a living by evaluating poets' poems, especially those of modern and contemporary poets. However, except for the works of a few poets, most of them are fleeting, and even bring us the wear and tear of aesthetic consciousness of poetry. In a word, there are many poets, but not many have poetic talents, and Huang Kai undoubtedly belongs to one of the outstanding poets. From the moment I read Huang Kai's poems, I felt a sense of excitement and liberation awakened from the numbness of poetry experience.

If we must ask about Huang Kai's talent in poetry, I think there is an intuitive grasp of the sense of form in Huang Kai's seemingly casual poems. His poems have a sense of overall melody, and the artistic world infiltrated by words has a high imagination. To a great extent, the mastery of language in his poems is not obtained through training, but every creation is an instant release of passion and inspiration. He is very sensitive to words and has a strong sense of language. In my opinion, Huang Kai's creation always walks in the combination of imagination and reality, and the intersection of words and spirit.

Meeting Huang Kai's poems is a brand-new artistic experience for me, and I have a kind of excitement that is both shocking and inspiring. Needless to say, at that moment, I suddenly realized the extraordinary artistic value and timeless energy contained in this young student's poems. To tell you the truth, I am very excited about this discovery. So I carefully selected fifteen poems from them and entered them into my computer as eternal treasures.

These beautiful poems by Huang Kai accompanied me for a long time, until one day-I came to Ningbo and my computer accidentally broke down. These poems sadly disappeared in my collection and are still irretrievable today. As far as I can remember, in Selected Poems of My Same Tree published later by the poet, only the first payment was made when I first read Huang Kai's poems, but according to the time after Selected Poems, this poem was written in 2004, 165438+23 years 10. I think this is probably the time when the Book of Songs was revised and published in a journal, not the first time.

Meeting the poet Zeng Huankai and reading his beautiful poems later became one of my best memories in Zhuhai College. Even so, I still think my short trip to the south has a different meaning.

two

In May 2002, I moved to Ningbo, and my contact with Huankai changed from direct to indirect. But because of the relationship between poetry-the relationship between the author and the reader, our friendship did not end because of the shift of time and space. In my spare time, I will consciously or unconsciously pay attention to sporadic news about Huankai. In fact, this is not because of the profession of teachers. Although I am a teacher, I always seem to lack a sense of professionalism. But I do find it exciting to see a young man grow up like mushrooms after rain when he is no longer young. Later, Academician Yan Luguang, then president of Ningbo University, mentioned at a meeting that he had asked his father and famous scientist Yan Jici for the benefits of higher education. The old educator, a former president of Zhejiang University, said earnestly that the duty of college teachers is to impart knowledge and discover talents. I feel when I think of my association with Huankai. In fact, I didn't make much contribution to the growth of Huang Kai's poetry creation, but as a teacher and reader, when I discovered and affirmed his poetic talent, I felt I was worthy of my duty. Of course, it would be great if this discovery and confirmation inspired his poetry creation.

Full of energy when reading, frequent literary exchanges, extremely diligent writing, admirable-young is good! If poetry belongs to the literary genre of young people, it may not be a big problem, because poetry is lyrical in nature, and of course youth and poetry coexist.

After leaving Guangdong, at the beginning of each year, Huankai will email me the new poems of the previous year, and I am happy to share his new works every time. This pleasure is beyond words. It not only gives me a refreshing feeling, but also makes me directly feel the vigorous pulse of a young man's growth.

About the eve of the Spring Festival in 2004, the poet sent me the electronic text of the poem he wrote the year before last. After reading it, I sincerely admire the poet's hard work in his spare time. I went to the post office to remit 200 yuan money to the poet, and wrote in my message: "I would like to express a reader's sincere respect for the author!" "I mean what I say.

From a diachronic point of view, the changes in creative style and theme of poems after Huan Kai are obvious. It seems that some pure and exquisite personal lyricism is missing, and the optimistic and brisk style is also reduced a lot. Passion obviously contains a sharp cynicism tendency, but the words are more free and easy. Individual chapters also make people obviously feel a deep nihilism-just like the philosophy class-I can't find the original text at hand, but the simple, ridiculous and profound image will be engraved in my mind forever. Especially in his poetry creation two years before his death, he made great efforts to put his vision into the life background of his hometown and constructed a great realm of coexistence of poetry and life. He seems to consciously entrust his life to the grand works he created. Although he is still very young, it seems that he is already exploring the spiritual road to his hometown.

After graduation, Huankai's career life seems to be going smoothly. It's convenient to know the information of Huankai at this time, because he started a blog on Sina. His blog is updated quickly, and his writing is still free and easy. I am a frequent visitor to his blog, and I often gain something from his blog. I also recommend Huankai's blog to my graduate students. At this time, Huankai's working state and mental outlook were deeply infected by its vitality. I also hope that my graduate students can learn from the enthusiasm of their peers.

From Huankai, I suddenly had an association. I feel that he is similar to Qiu Dongping, a famous Cantonese writer in the history of modern literature, both in appearance and temperament. He is passionate, fierce, upright and full of sense of justice, but sometimes he can't help being extreme. Speaking of it, their hometown is not far apart, one is in Meizhou and the other is in Haifeng. Both of them are very talented, devout in literature, and have a strong will to join the WTO, and both of them decided themselves in a strong sense of frustration in joining the WTO. In terms of personal behavior, everyone is strong.

Qiu Dongping was born in 19 10 and died in1941; Zeng Huankai was born in 1979 and died in 2008. One is 3 1 year old and the other is 29 years old. ...

three

All happy friends will feel sad for the sudden death of the poet. Today, the topic of "the poet's death" has nothing to do with the poet, because he has already walked on the road to heaven. In fact, each of us will inevitably embark on a journey of death as time goes by. But the death of the poet, because of blood or poetry, has become a lingering pain in the hearts of the living.

On August 3, 2008, after attending Huankai's memorial service in Dongguan, bits and pieces about Huankai's life have been lingering in my mind. I really want to write something, but I don't know what to say at the moment. So this idea gradually faded out of my mind with the busy life of the laity. In 2009, Brother Rong Hao from Zhuhai told me that a poetry recitation and seminar on Huankai would be held in Zhuhai College on May 16, and invited me to write some words for Huankai. As a teacher and friend, I can't shirk it. This activity is a very meaningful activity for both poets and students of Zhuhai College. The poet's subjective death cannot conceal the secular value of the poet's great poems. However, I really hesitate to write something, because I know I can't write powerful words. Brother Rong Hao replied, as long as the situation is true.

In this case, I have to explore my long-lost memory again. Suddenly found that the poet actually met death more than once before his death. According to Huankai, he had a serious suicide experience long before he went to college. The reason is unknown, except that it was under the careful care of his mother that helped him through the crisis of life. But a later activity, let me personally experience this kind of life symptom that happened to Huankai in a sense-

It seems that on March 26th, 2002, the anniversary of the poet Haizi's death, Huan Kai worked hard to hold a box of mineral water and invited Professor Wang Xiangping, two musicians in Zhuhai and more than a dozen students in his class to hold a purely spontaneous commemoration for Haizi in Zhuhai Seaside Park. My heart is very startled, and to tell the truth, there are some secular ideas mixed with it. 1On March 26th, 989, Haizi, as I know, committed suicide in Shanhaiguan. Since then, I have heard many articles about "the death of a poet". But whether Haizi's death made his poetry great, I have reservations-it still does today. But Huan Kai's love of poetry made me unable to refuse his request.

But now I guess, in launching this activity to commemorate Haizi, does my compatriot tree also include the "poet's death" factor besides poetry? I think there should be.

I remember rainy days, cold winds and cold air. Even in Zhuhai, it was a rare bad weather in a year. In a pavilion in an empty and desolate seaside park, everyone sat together, and the atmosphere was slightly depressed and solemn. Huang Kai made an opening speech, and then I made an impassioned impromptu speech along the fashionable viewpoint of "the poet's death". With the help of language inertia, I seem to be moved by my speech. Then everyone was very involved in discussing this topic. I believe this matter will touch the parties more or less. In fact, the artificiality of cultural activities is obvious, but the influence of value identification on people is produced from this. The essence of culture is probably embodied in the dynamic shaping of life and body by spirit.

10, on June 4th, 2007, a poet and novelist in Yunnan committed suicide, and Huan Kai wrote a poem "Center" full of sympathy and pity. Now that I think about it, leeway's behavior undoubtedly cast a heavy shadow on Huankai's spiritual world, because in the center, Huankai closely linked leeway's fate with himself. Look at this poem: "1998, I took the road of suicide/because of pressure and hopelessness for the future/my mother and a distant relative saved me/I was' alive'. However, I have been on my way home from' death'/with people who love me/with people who love me/to die, just for/but along the way, there is' love', which makes the painful journey/full of happiness, gratitude and happy tears. "

Everyone must know what happened to the poet in August 2008 1. In my opinion, Huang Kai's final pessimism-in a sense, it can also be considered philosophical-"disappearing" is almost the fulfillment of a "central theme":

A bird, flying on the stratus.

That tired body, confused eyes

Can only be covered by gray clouds.

However, perhaps how fragile clouds are.

He can't penetrate, and his strength is running out.

Inner weakness can make you feel the ethereal sky.

He flapped his wings hard, but he still couldn't get around.

Lightning lurks around the clouds.

Everyone he loves is down there.

The bustling past of the earth.

They can't fly, they can't indulge in it—

Happiness and pain cannot be separated from each other in the noise.

It's raining, cold rain.

There are no scattered feathers.

No more lonely shadows.

Since then, the sky has been like fresh blue sheets.

And the earth, continue to be like a garbage dump.

Matter persists in the decay of matter.

Dreams evaporate invisibly, and everything is slowly.

Disappear, in the near or distant future.

Life or death? This is indeed a problem, and it is an eternal problem for mankind. Perhaps through life and death, we get a glimpse of the unsolved mystery of life, but we can never solve it.

……

The poet has passed away, and it is irreparable after all. Fortunately, however, the poems left by the poet transcend the fetters of death. I am convinced that the brilliant and touching poems left by the poet will not and will not die with the death of the poet's life and body. Those well-known beautiful poems will still travel through time and space in a spiritual way, capture her bosom friend, and then continue the poet's life. This is the place where poets are superior to ordinary people and laymen, and it is also the essential sign that poetry shows its noble value.

Late at night on May 10, 2009