Classic hilarious jokes in the workplace

Classic hilarious jokes in the workplace

The workplace is like a battlefield, and people in the workplace have countless pressures and jobs every day, so people in the workplace are very depressed. At this time, whoever tells a funny joke will definitely make them laugh and decompress a lot. Look at the classic hilarious jokes in the workplace.

Classic joke in the workplace 1 1. At a banquet, a boss's front door zipper was unzipped without knowing it. His female secretary found it inconvenient to speak directly because the guests were present, reminding the boss, "Boss, your garage door is open."

The boss is puzzled. "Oh, have you seen my BMW?"

No, just two broken tires. The female secret replied.

There is a mental illness near a company. When someone passes by him, he will chase after him and ask, "Really? Isn't it? Yes . . "One day, an employee of the company was going to be late for work. When he arrived at the company, he happened to meet the mental derangement coming towards him, fearing that he would pester him and said:

"Yes, yes, I am. . . "The psychopath replied" SB "

3. One day, Lao Wang went to the laundry owner angrily. After meeting, he said angrily, "Come and see your masterpiece!" "

With that, he threw a thick rope on the table. The boss looked at it and said, "Sir, this thick rope is very good."

Lao Wang roared, "I'll send the sheets to wash."

4. One day, a De miss de mode wearing a mini skirt walked into a laundry, and the young boss in the store stared at her.

At this time, the young lady proudly waved to the young boss and said, "Young man, go do your job!" " "

The young boss said solemnly, "Miss, you didn't wash and shrink this skirt in our shop."

The husband proudly said to his wife, "Today, I went to the dry cleaner to wash clothes, and the waiter put three stars on the label of the clothes!"

The wife is puzzled: "What does that mean?"

"This shows that my clothes are of high grade, reminding workers to be careful not to damage them." The husband said.

The next day, my wife took the list to the dry cleaner to pick up the clothes, and specially reminded: "It's the most upscale, three-star."

The waiter quickly found the clothes and handed them to her. He smiled and said, "We put three stars on the label to remind the workers that the clothes are dirty and need to be washed several times ..."

6. A female colleague asked me! Did you talk about your girlfriend?

Me: No, my mother-in-law hasn't delivered the goods yet!

Another colleague heard the answer: is it because you haven't paid yet, so she won't deliver the goods to you …

7. That idiot colleague is dejected and despondent at work. I asked with concern, "What's the matter with you?"

My colleague sighed: "Stop it, I lost a bet with someone from China yesterday."

I am curious: "Really, what do you bet?"

Colleague said: "Running 800 meters behind my wife's back, damn it, my wife is flesh and blood, and my wife is full of anger."

8. Colleague: Did you quarrel with your girlfriend?

Me: Well, he told me to leave a woman.

Colleague: What did you say?

Me: I'm not leaving.

Colleague: You're going to piss off your girlfriend!

Me: Do you want me to make my mother angry, damn it!

9. Today, a male colleague and a female colleague quarreled in the office, and they quarreled with each other.

Unable to argue with the man, the woman picked up the perfume and sprayed it on the man.

He said, "Nima, I can't argue with you and let your wife make you go!" " "

10, there are so many people in the rush hour. Today, people are crowded on buses to go to work. A man stood behind me with a shoulder pole in his right hand and a pancake in his left. My daughter, pancakes have been burning my ass. I can't take it anymore. I can't hide. I was determined to take revenge ... later, I farted silently. Later, I saw that the man's food was particularly delicious, and I was fine. ...

1 1, "portal": Only by looking for a "portal" will there be a "way out".

12, "courtesy" is a stylized condom that is not one of our own. On the surface, it is polite, but in fact it keeps people away.

13, "debt of gratitude" actually has little to do with "feelings". More often, it is an expense of interest exchange.

14. When someone tells you what to do in principle, he is actually hinting at what to do in principle.

15. In the past, lofty people regarded money as dirt. Today, "lofty" people treat people who have no money as dirt.

16, power is a good cosmetic, and the face of life has changed greatly with the ups and downs of power.

17. Compliments are blank checks written to others, but to the editor himself, they are real proof of deposit.

18, the mask is very revealing. Face, face is a mask with strong concealment.

19, the private use of leaders is often considered to be the greatest reuse, which is why so many people are vying to be leaders' guns and willing to be leaders' tools.

20. It is better to run errands than to write, to brag than to be competent, to speak than to make public, to be obedient than to be disciplined, and to be flexible than to adhere to principles.

2 1, a bunch of workplace theories, basically bragging; Among them, it has its own true taste, only to experience it carefully; Go to work on time, the boss can't offend; Ask your predecessors humbly, your experience is valuable; Compliment is the key to give full play to your work.

Classic hilarious jokes in the workplace 2 1. The most useless thing in the world is a paycheck. When you look angry, you wipe your ass too carefully.

2. A county magistrate was dismissed and he became a vegetable. He was taken to the hospital. After the doctor diagnosed the disease, he said: It may be good to read him a notice of reinstatement. The wife thought: since you want to study, learn to be a director and make him happy. When the magistrate heard this, he stood up and stopped laughing.

Medical sigh: not increasing the dose according to the doctor's advice.

3. A benefactor, a poor monk, came to the Tang Dynasty in the east and went to the Western Heaven to worship Buddha and get married. Passing by your shop all the way, the weather is unbearable. Please give me and my disciples a cup of Mai Le Shuang to relieve the heat. Buddha bless you with prosperous business and rolling financial resources.

4. Two cannibals went to work, and the boss said, "If you eat people in the company, you will be fired immediately!" After three months of peace, one day the boss scolded them: "I told you not to eat people, but you still ate them and fired them!" " "When two cannibals left, one of them couldn't help cursing the other when he went out:" How many times have I told you not to eat work? We eat a department manager every day, and nothing happens. Yesterday you ate a programmer and got caught! "

5, will not drink, the future is not; Drink nine taels at a time, focusing on training; Drink only drinks, and the leaders don't drink; Can drink and not lose, leading the secretary; If you drink it, you will fall, and your official position will be difficult to protect; Drinking too little for a long time makes it difficult to find talents; Halfway through, the promotion is still early; Lead the whole process and lead the future!

6. The advertisement of Yili Milk Expo Edition is really good. China's child poured milk from this to that, and the whole world drank it, but she didn't drink it herself. China children are smart enough to know that this milk is not drinkable.