A joke that amuses girls for a minute.

A joke that amuses girls for a minute.

Everyone has a joke about the secular desire to make girls happy for a minute. Many aspects of people's emotions and emotions will be affected by many factors. Girls will tell a joke to coax them when they are unhappy. Let's share a joke to make girls happy for a minute.

A joke that makes girls happy in one minute 1 a humorous joke that makes girlfriends happy.

1. One day, the cow gave the donkey a difficult problem and asked which of the two bugs under the word "stupid" was male and which was female. The donkey racked his brains, but he still couldn't answer. Cow scolds: What a donkey, male left and female right!

2. Seven years after graduation, I finally accepted a big project to build a 30-meter chimney, with a construction period of two months and a cost of 300,000 yuan, but I had to pay for it myself. It was finally finished at the end of last year. Today, people went to check and accept, and they were scolded to death, and they still had no money. ! The drawings are upside down, and people are going to dig wells!

A drunk accidentally fell from the third floor, attracting passers-by to watch. A policeman came over: What's the matter? Drunk: I don't know. I just arrived.

The doctor asked the patient how he broke his bone. The patient said, I felt sand in my shoes, so I shook my shoes with a telephone pole. One of them passed by and thought I was electrocuted, so he picked up a stick and gave me two!

5. The tortoise is hurt. Let snails buy medicine. Two hours later. The snail hasn't come back yet. The tortoise was in a hurry to scold: if I don't come back, I will die! At this time, the snail's voice came from outside the door: you said I wouldn't go!

6. Someone keeps a pig, and hates and dislikes it, but the pig knows the way home, and it is useless to dislike it. One day, he drove a lot of cars and abandoned the pig. He called home late at night and asked, "Is the pig coming back?" Answer: "I have come back!" " It growled, "put it on the phone, I'm lost!"

7. The elephant accidentally stepped on the ant's nest, and the ant crawled on the elephant. The elephant shook its body and the ants fell down. At this time, there was another elephant around its neck, and the fallen ant shouted "strangle it".

8. One morning in computer class, a row of classmates' computers crashed. So a classmate stood up and said, "Teacher, the computer crashed, and our platoon was all dead." At this time, many students said, "We are dead, too." Then the teacher asked, "Who else is not dead?" Only one classmate stood up and said, "I'm not dead yet!" " "The teacher said strangely," the whole class is dead. Why don't you die? "

9. Before eating peanuts, monkeys should put peanuts in their buttocks before taking them out. The administrator explained: Someone once fed it peaches, but the peach core could not be pulled out. The monkey is afraid. You must measure it before eating now.

10, sophomore, girls in the dormitory all like Emil Wakin Chau's songs, and a tape was borrowed by everyone. One day, the girl in the upper bunk asked: Where is my Emil Wakin Chau? The girl in the lower bunk replied, It's in my bed! There was silence for two seconds, and then everyone fell on the bed.

A little joke to amuse girls.

One: Sleeping in class: A student sleeps in class and is found by the teacher. Teacher: "Why do you sleep in class?" A student: "I didn't sleep!" " "Teacher:" Then why do you close your eyes? "A student:" I'm closing my eyes! ""Teacher: "Then why do you nod?" A student: "What you just said is very reasonable!" " "Teacher:" Then why are you drooling? A student: "teacher, you speak with relish!" "

Two: I am happy to think that all the children are afraid of me, but my wife later said: Only you are the most obedient and obedient at home! Go buy me a bag of salt.

Three: Once upon a time, there were two people, one named Zhuang and the other named Xiao, who disappeared one day. Zhuang happened to see a group of people fighting, so he went to Bala and said, I'll find Xiao! The gang paused and said, are you faking it? Yes, I am!

Four: The mother calls her son to get up again: Jacques, good boy, it's time to get up. You have heard the cock crow several times. What does it have to do with me? I am not a hen.

Five: The chimpanzee accidentally stepped on the stool pulled by the gibbon. After the gibbon cleaned it gently and carefully, they fell in love. People ask how they are together. Chimpanzees said with emotion: ape dung! It's all ape shit!

Husband holding an orchid bowl said solemnly to his wife, "You can't break the bowl again. This bowl was left by your mother. There are only two left at present, and the others have been left behind by you. " The wife gave her husband a white look and said, "Then don't be angry with me in the future. I was dumped by my mother, too, leaving me alone. "

Seven: I have four children, all very naughty. One day, I came home from work and the children were quarrelling at home. My wife was very happy to see me back and said, you finally came back. That's great. I am very happy to think that the children are afraid of me. Unexpectedly, my wife later said: only you are the most obedient and obedient at home! Go buy me a bag of salt.

Eight: the so-called love at first sight is just a matter of seeing the color; The so-called long-term love is just weighing the pros and cons. The so-called buddies are the best, but they are just arrogant. The so-called sisters are the biggest waves, but they are only pretending. Have a good time.

Nine: Khrushchev visited the farm, and the reporter took a photo of him and the pig in the pigsty. The next day, I saw a postscript in the newspaper: the third from the left is Comrade Khrushchev.

Ten: Children are thinking about "heredity and environment". Mom interjected: This question is very simple. As we all know, children who look like their fathers are inherited. Like neighbors, that is the environment.

A joke that amuses girls.

1. Before meeting you, I never knew the feeling of missing and the sweetness of love. Please allow me to start from this Valentine's Day and let this feeling accompany me all my life!

You whisper that you love me, let me cling to your chest and gently touch my heartstrings with gentle words. The international community belongs to both of us, and our hearts are closely linked.

3, there is a true feeling that can be silently forgotten in the rivers and lakes. Friends of gentlemen, or strangers, can quietly love, quietly understand, quietly fill their hearts with wishes, wave their hands, let the spring grass continue and become a red array.

4. Days pass in different spaces, and I miss coming at different times. No matter how things change, you will always be my only love.

5. Meeting you by chance is my organization; I love you unconsciously, not intentionally; I really love you; I am willing to treat you wholeheartedly; But having you for a lifetime is what I want most!

6. I am the one who has been pursuing you, and I am the one who has been thinking about you. When I first saw you, your charm conquered me. You are the most worthy pursuit in my life. Only you can save my life, you know? Renminbi.

7. I heard that you are looking for a job recently. I gave you a name. Go to the interview. The work is simple, the salary is good, and more importantly, it is a world-renowned enterprise with absolutely good development. The position is toilet cleaner. Remember to go!

8. Are you busy? Please answer some of my doubts: I always have insomnia and woke up once when I was a child; I don't want to work seven days a week; Laugh at the thought of harassing you. Hurry back, I only ate three meals today, and I'm hungry!

9, don't worry about eating, just bow your head; Don't worry about your job, I've taken care of it for you; You don't have to worry about marriage, but express your feelings with your eyes; Don't worry about buying a house, someone will repair it at home; Don't worry about talking, you will brag naturally, because you are a big stupid cow!

10, you said that you bought a lottery ticket and didn't win 5 million; Find a person and never meet a fairy; Go to work and always work overtime. I'll teach you a wonderful way of luck, keep it a secret, but you can't tell others, that is-step on it.

A joke that makes girls happy in one minute 2 1. I sang lonely sandbar, which was out of tune, and the first two sentences were miserable. I used to sing "Grandpa" night after night. My grandfather in the sky must be very warm when he hears it.

2. Chatting with a big brother in the hospital at noon. He was called mentally retarded at night, and now he doubts his IQ.

I just dialed 10086, and the customer service girl asked me what I needed. I said to her, "Nothing, just to pay a New Year call to you." I heard the customer service girl almost cry, and then gave me her phone number.

4.o said to Q: Look, brother, we have only been in the bureau for a few years, and our waists are thick and our stomachs are round. Only you and I know what we have done, but don't let people hold on to you, or we will both be finished. On the surface, I was naked and had nothing. I thought it was zero.

5. Tofu mother came to the kindergarten to pick up the children. The teacher asked, Mrs. Tofu, do you like hot pot? Mother Tofu: I like it very much! Teacher: Great! ..... When playing hide-and-seek in the afternoon, your children hid in the refrigerator.

6. A cockroach passed by you that day. You greet it and say, "Xiao Qiang, where are you going?" Xiao Qiang was dumbfounded, looked at you in surprise, and then said to you, "Pig head, how do you know my screen name?" You also want to know why even Xiao Qiang knows you are a pig. I'm watching. I feel guilty. I told him. Is it shameful to let others know that you are a pig? Why can't Xiao Qiang know?

7. Feng Gong: "Audience friends, I miss you so much. Did you add me to Weibo? " Jiang Kun: "The times have developed and science and technology have advanced. Hey, I recently used a new gadget called Weibo. " Huang Hong: "The Internet is so popular that everyone wears a scarf. If you find a college lover, don't tell your wife. " Guo: "Wife, I really didn't add her Weibo first!

8.Q said to Q: Stand up straight and don't get down. Q said to q: it's too rigid, easy to fold and difficult to confuse.

9. A good gay friend recently wanted to rob because of lack of money, but he didn't have stockings at home and couldn't afford equipment, so I took out a mask and put it on him thoughtfully!

10. A cat caught a mouse and was about to bite. The mouse begged, Brother, if you let me go, I will tell you a big secret. The cat asked, What's the secret? The mouse said: I found that your wife had an abnormal relationship with a cat. If you let me go, I will tell you who he is. The cat bit the mouse angrily and said, How dare you lie to me? I've been divorced for a year.

A joke that makes girls happy in one minute 3 1, "Husband, I feel so fat and want to lose weight."

"Don't lose weight, now use your ugliness as an excuse."

2. The husband saw the clothes in the closet and said to his wife, "Women are animals who love the new and hate the old."

The wife immediately retorted, "Who said that? We are also very nostalgic.". "

The husband asked, "What do you miss?"

The wife said, "Age!"

3. A boyfriend and girlfriend fell in love on a park bench. The woman suddenly wants to fart.

Say to the man: I am a cereal bird, do you listen to it?

Men are really willing to listen.

So, under the cover of "goo goo" birdsong, the woman happily farted.

W: Does it sound like a cuckoo?

Man: What a fart! I didn't catch it!

4. Just seeing my classmate's help, Weibo growled: Help me see what to do if my hand is stuck by 502!

The middle finger and thumb stick together, and I am Guanyin now!

5. The painter Xu Beihong is famous for drawing horses. The horses in his works are vigorous, with different postures, or gallop, or look back and scream, or gallop.

With the maturity of the creative stage, his later works are mainly pastoral, villagers and children, without traces of horses, because he finally realized the artistic essence of "no horse is king".

6. When attending a friend's wedding, the groom said affectionately to his parents-in-law: Mom and Dad, don't worry, I will treat her well and take good care of her like a brother and sister.

7. Several monks are responsible for cleaning the clothes of the whole Shaolin Temple. The abbot often says to them, "As long as you are willing to work hard, laundry can also be overhauled."

Other monks are getting tired. Only Feng Ming, a young monk, always remembers the abbot's instruction and washes every piece of clothes carefully.

Finally, one day, many things happened and the abbot promoted him to be the deacon of the First Hospital.

Feng Ming found some long hairs in the abbot's cassock.

8. My wife said to me, "Who said,' Is yours mine, mine or mine?' This is simply contempt for family harmony.

Dear, please rest assured that in our family, without Wu Zetian and Cixi, we will always be equal: the housework is yours and the TV remote control is mine; The loan card is yours and the salary card is mine ... "

9. Wife: What if we die and go to hell?

Husband: I will pray to God that you will go to heaven. I'm alone in hell!

Wife: You have a conscience!

Husband: I'm afraid we're both in hell and married. For me, that's the real hell.