I thought you would never leave me

The love at that time was really pure and outrageous, like the eyes of an unexperienced baby. The eyes reflected all the luster without any desire. The eyes reflected her and her heart. The one who whispers softly is still her, and the one who is haunted every day is still because of her.

It was like an image in my mind exuding a touch of sadness, as if everything had happened, but it seemed as if nothing had happened.

01

I don’t know since when, Xia Xiaowan always felt that someone was paying attention to her, as if someone was secretly watching her, there was an indescribable feeling, in this kind of avoidance Under his gaze, she felt fuzzy and uncomfortable.

But every time I look back, the students are looking down at their books and answering their questions seriously. They are completely deaf to what is happening outside the window. Could it be me? Illusion?

No matter, it’s not important anymore. We are all classmates anyway, and reading is more important. It’s not long before the college entrance examination. The college entrance examination is not a child’s play. Come on, Xia Xiaowan. He encouraged himself secretly.

Time flows gently, through the densely packed textbooks, and through the small shrubs outside the classroom, as if short new buds have grown on them, unabashedly showing the desire for life, the sunshine It also slowly became brighter, covering the buildings outside the window with glowing light.

She raised her head and enjoyed this rare rest time. During this period, although she was under a lot of pressure and breathless, at least she could feel her rapid progress. It was worth it. She thought.

But the most depressing thing for her was that she had never found the source of that gaze. Every time she looked up to see who it was, her eyes were empty every time. It was strange, but she Trusting her instinct, she must find this guy out.

Could it be that corner? There were a few boys sitting there. Maybe it was him, but he was quite serious now, but it felt like his eyes were coming from there. Who was that?

02

At noon that day, the old classman was still as leisurely as ever. He walked slowly and leisurely into the classroom. He glanced at the people below who were busy writing and spoke. ：

"Stop the pens in your hands for a moment." He paused: "The school has recently considered that our graduating class is facing the pressure of the college entrance examination and is overwhelmed. The school has considered this situation and is preparing to There will be a sports meeting on Friday next week, and I hope everyone will participate enthusiastically."

As soon as I finished speaking, there was an explosion under the podium. There were complaints and complaints. In short, no one was willing to participate.

After class, the sports committee member was very busy, recruiting people to participate in the competition. However, everyone's enthusiasm was not so high, and they declined each other.

But in the end, it was okay. After a day of lobbying, the candidates were basically finalized. However, there was really no one participating in the women's 5000 meters.

The whole class fell into silence, no one was afraid of calling their own names.

A sharp voice suddenly sounded, "Xiaowan, didn't you say you used to like long-distance running? Your chance has come." Her deskmate sold her, Xiaowan quickly stared at her and said with a A murderous look prevented her deskmate from continuing to speak, but she still poured the beans into the bamboo tube and spit them out.

As soon as he finished speaking, the sports committee member strode over and said with a smile on his face: "Okay, Xiaowan, I didn't see it. You look so delicate and you are so good at long-distance running." , OK, it’s up to you.”

So there was really no one participating in the project, and she was a person who didn’t know how to say no, so she had no choice but to agree.

03

The competition date soon arrived, and the sports ground was filled with colorful flags and loud voices. It looked like a majestic and high-spirited scene, as if everyone had participated. The pressure they face in the college entrance examination has been greatly reduced.

There are only two hours left for her to take the field. The 5,000-meter long-distance race is the finale event of the sports meeting. She has already put on sports shorts and a sports jersey, sweeping away the ladylike image of the previous two days. Becoming heroic and ready to go.

But she could still feel that someone was watching her silently, and she trusted her intuition.

With the sound of a gunshot, the athletes ran on the field with loud gongs and drums, and the cheering people around them shouted at the top of their lungs, as if fighting with them to advance and retreat, fighting for honor and disgrace, Xiaowan Admit it, she likes this atmosphere and this overwhelming feeling.

In the middle of the race, some people kept quitting the competition. They had been reading and reviewing, and they didn’t have much time to exercise. Many people couldn’t hold on until halfway through, but just try your best.

With five laps left, yes, she was already running unconscious and out of breath. The hot sun beat on her mercilessly, as if she was forcing them to give up. Only when she saw the teacher's outstretched hand did she realize that she had run more than half the distance.

She had been distanced by the people in front of her. She knew that she had no hope of winning the prize. In addition, she was so tired that she could hardly move her legs. She looked at the people around her. A person passed by her, and at this moment, she actually had the idea of ??withdrawing from the competition.

Unexpectedly, a man ran out from her class, holding an opened bottle of water, and sprinkled it as he ran. When he ran to her side, she took a closer look. , isn't it the boy in the corner? He handed her the water.

She waved her hand to signal that she would not drink. At this time, he rushed to her right and stood in line with her. He was ready to run with her, but due to excessive exhaustion, she did not speak, just looked at her. We communicated for a while, but I was still vaguely moved.

Since there were people running together, the feeling of being left behind was made up for a lot. Although I ran slowly, I finished the remaining laps after all. But in these few laps, it seemed like a century had passed for her. At the end, her legs seemed not to obey her.

At the finish line, the runner in front had already finished the race, but this did not stop Lao Ban from extending his thumb to her. She smiled weakly and looked at the boy next to her. , and he had already brought water to accompany her. Both of them were people who didn't talk much. No one spoke for a while, and the atmosphere became very subtle.

At this time, he took the initiative to break the silence: "Well, I think you can't hold on any longer, so I went up. How about you don't mind?"

" Why do you mind? If it weren't for you, I probably wouldn't have been able to run down, thank you."

"That's fine, that's fine, I'm afraid of making you unhappy"

He scratched his head and smiled shyly. She also smiled softly with him, and the corners of his mouth were full of joy.

Love at that time was always very simple. Sometimes her smiles and smiles could gently affect your emotions. Even though nothing happened, you felt that you had gained a lot without asking for anything. Yes, just watch him smile.

04

After the sports meeting, the two of them gradually became familiar with each other, and she discovered that he was actually a very careful boy, with eyelashes as curved as crescent moons, and eyes as big as It's a pity, but why didn't I notice it before? she thought.

His hands are very beautiful, slender and very clean, and he likes drawing very much. The cartoons he draws always amaze her. This one looks ordinary but yet The clever boy suddenly broke into her heart.

She asked him if he had stared at her, but unexpectedly, he boldly admitted it. Now it was Xiaowan's turn to be coy. She blushed, but she remained friendly. He joked: "Who asked you to look at it? Did I let you look at me?"

"Because of something you don't know"

"What is it, tell me"

"Your hair is very greasy, and I was stunned."

"You are looking for a beating."

The classroom was full of joy.

Time was always very boring at that time, but thanks to his company, it also added a little spice to life.

But at that time, sometimes a little gossip would be spread, let alone the two of them fighting together every day.

05

That night, after the evening self-study, the two of them went for a walk on the playground together, wandering back and forth on the Ruyin green ground, blowing in the refreshing night breeze, and looking at the sky. Stars, the mental stress of the day has been released, as if the troubles have been temporarily forgotten.

Suddenly, he said:

"Do you know what others say about us?"

"I seem to have heard some. I don't know if it was you who heard it. "Arrived"

He turned back to look at her, his eyelashes flickering, and he suddenly became very serious, and then said:

"They said we were in love, what do you think? ”

She didn’t know how to answer. She recalled what happened to them recently. They had indeed gotten very close recently, and many people started talking about it. She had always wanted to avoid this topic. She was unwilling to face it, and now that he had brought it up on the table, she had to take a good look at this relationship.

She didn’t speak, but the boy spoke again:

“I don’t care what they say, anyway,” she said in a paused tone, “I just like you.”

< p> After saying that, he suddenly turned his head to look at her. Xiaowan was caught off guard, and his eyes were full of eyes. So she hurriedly lowered her head to hide her inner panic. Indeed, she did not dare to respond to his passionate gaze.

She especially likes to stay with him. Puppy love is a word she has never thought of. Maybe it is a forbidden area that she does not want to think about.

At this time, he tentatively stretched out his hand to her. The outstretched hand was trembling and trembling, as if the wind could make it retract.

It’s on the playground. There are so many people I know. It’s not the right time to hold hands. I was discovered by teachers and classmates. How can I explain it? I can’t explain it at all. Then my image is completely ruined.”

< p> "Hurry up and shrink back. I won't pull you. Hurry up. Even though I didn't say it, you understand. Why don't you shrink back? I can't pull you back. But if I don't hold your hand, , What should I do if he ignores me? I can’t watch him draw next time, ah, it’s so annoying.”

Finally his hand retracted, and she breathed a long sigh of relief, thinking that finally it's over. Later, he pretended that nothing happened and went back to their respective dormitories.

After returning to the dormitory, the more he thought about it, the more uncomfortable he became. Xiaowan suddenly felt that she was easy to do, and she obviously had a crush on him. Why did she have to be timid? She looked like a little daughter-in-law. Sad, she felt distressed and funny at the same time.

She picked up her phone and sent him a text message:

"Hey, are you asleep? I can't sleep, it's all your fault." Soon he sent a reply

p>

"What, it's my fault, I didn't say anything"

"Who made you so sudden? I don't blame you, but you don't even give me any mental preparation."

"Ah, so you promised me"

"Promise you big-headed devil"

"Haha, then you promised me , Haha, you are my girlfriend, you can’t go back on your word."

Maybe he was too happy to sleep on the other end of the phone, but Xiaowan thought more. Maybe, by nature, girls mature earlier than boys. .

06

On the second day of class, the two of them were still as usual, not caring about other people's eyes, and there was an affectionate look in each other's eyes.

Love at that time was so simple, just seeing her by his side, whether it was looking at his side face doing homework or seeing him sleeping on the table, it would make her happy. Huaerlai, at that time, holding hands was the limit that could be achieved in school, just like the pure student days, without any flavor of lust.

Xiaowan is very busy. In addition to studying, she also has Youth League Committee work that requires her to consult and provide guidance. She has no choice but to be the backbone of literature and art.

But every time I go back to the classroom and see him, I am very happy. He is a soft place in my heart. Seeing him smiling cleanly, I feel very happy. And this person is her now boyfriend.

At that age, I had never experienced the baptism of life at all. I recited various love poems in my heart every day while thinking about giving up betraying the whole world for him. But now that I think about it, it is quite interesting. After all, that It's the taste of youth.

One afternoon, because she was still busy, Xiaowan's best friend Yating asked her to accompany her to the pharmacy to buy some cold medicine. Xiaowan couldn't leave, so she asked her boyfriend to accompany her.

After going back and forth, they became familiar with each other, and Xiaowan didn't think anything was wrong, until he walked with her less and less, and every time he said he felt uncomfortable and had to go back to the dormitory early, she also Didn't think much about it.

07

Until one day, she went for a run on the playground alone. Under the shadow of the moonlight, she found two figures in front of her who looked very familiar. It was him and her best friend. .

"Hey, this guy has gone back to the dormitory, why is he here with Yating?" she whispered to herself, should I go say hello, she thought to herself.

Could it be? She seemed to think of something unbelievable. It couldn't really happen. She didn't dare to think about it. She just kept comforting herself in her heart. It was all a coincidence. It must be that they didn't pay attention to the encounter. It’s just a conversation together, definitely nothing else.

They wouldn’t do this behind my back. How could that bloody scene on TV happen in real life? Moreover, both of them are people so close to me. They wouldn’t do this. , she has been comforting herself.

However, this guy clearly said he was uncomfortable. His uncomfortable look in the classroom was completely different from his light steps now. Could it be that he was pretending to make me feel at ease? She didn't want to think about this anymore.

But why are they holding hands, this and this~~~~~·

Xiaowan is simple, but she is not stupid.

For a moment, sadness and dissatisfaction hit her heart, almost making her breathless. It was as if a blackness suddenly appeared in front of her eyes, and the darkness was pressing down on her. She wanted to go forward and question her. She can't do it.

She felt that she was suddenly in a lonely state, as if she was thrown into a boundless wilderness, letting the storm roll up her trouser legs and clothes, stir up her long hair, and beside her, There is not even anyone to get close to.

At school, she thought that the two people with whom she had the closest relationship had both betrayed her, and in this way, the two figures behind them seemed to be deeply mocking her, mocking her stupid cuteness.

She was no longer in the mood to continue running. Feeling like a defeated general, she returned to the dormitory dejectedly. After returning, she went to bed early and did not want to mention it to anyone. She was strong in her bones. She was not allowed to reveal the slightest hint of sadness.

A person can only secretly shed a few tears under the quilt.

You can swallow the bitter pill yourself, but you cannot let them live so freely.

08

[if !supportLists]The next day, [endif] she still pretended to be nonchalant and playful with him, but this time But she was not as gentle as before, and he screamed out in pain several times, but when she saw that he was about to get angry, she quickly pretended to be pitiful, and the boys had nothing to do with her.

Not only that, she also pretended to be in love with each other. Although she endured the nausea and discomfort in her heart, when she saw that her best friend kept looking back with excuses, Xiaowan pretended to smile at her happily. , as if his eyes were full of love.

Her best friend could only apologize, but there seemed to be a trace of unwillingness in her eyes. Seeing their unnatural behavior, she actually felt an inexplicable pleasure in revenge.

After a few days like this, she still didn't break up, and the atmosphere was brewing calmly. Confession requires atmosphere, and breaking up requires an opportunity.

But they didn't notice much. She probably figured out where they usually hang out. After figuring out the route, in the next few nights, no matter how he made excuses, she stayed with him. Stay on the side and never leave.

She felt that she had enough time, so she had evening self-study that night. She said that she was not feeling well and should go back to the dormitory first. Naturally, her partner was very happy and asked her to go back first and have a good rest. Xiaowan endured it I said goodbye to him naturally.

After leaving the house, Xiaowan found a place to hide at the top of the stairs. With only one pair of eyes exposed, she stared at the door of the classroom. As soon as she saw him, she tiptoed out of the door. Her eyes as she looked around were really interesting. The stock smells like a guilty conscience.

So she slowly followed him, and she had to say that she really had a sense of detective, keeping her cool and not leaking any traces.

After walking for a while, the two of them met, just like an underground party meeting. They looked around vigilantly to make sure there were no acquaintances around before they walked together intimately.

At this moment, she actually felt pity for them both, for meeting so secretly.

"Xiaowan, what are you thinking? They both betrayed you. The two closest people actually did such a thing, but you are still thinking about them." A thought suddenly struck you. Entered her brain, "Yes, they were at fault first."

But it feels like he is so relaxed now and seems happier than when he was with me. It's because we really don't agree. Is it appropriate?

Thinking of this, she no longer felt the pleasure of revenge. She kept thinking in her heart, was it a mistake to be together from the beginning? They were not really suitable.

A picture flashed through his mind, including laughter together, sadness, his careful comfort, and more doubts about this relationship. She wanted to go up and have a big fight with him, but she found that she couldn't do it. Maybe it was cowardice, maybe more of kindness. She returned to the dormitory in despair. This time she couldn't cry, but she felt depressed and uncomfortable.

She took out her mobile phone and slowly edited the text message:

Tonight, I saw it, and I knew everything. I didn’t know what to say, I just felt uncomfortable. Two of the most trustworthy people betrayed me like this.

The happiest thing that has ever happened to me is that I met you at the most beautiful age. I have looked forward to the future. There are many things I want to do with you. I have also thought about what I would do if one day we were no longer together, but I did not expect it would be so unbearable.

I don’t want to bless you, but I will try to forgive, and thank you for appearing in my life, letting me know that there is such a person in the world who can make me never look back, even if the ending is not what I want. .Goodbye, never again!

Then, he slowly pressed send and blocked the number.