After slapping my 15-year-old son twice, I feel very solid inside.

Author |? Yang Mengyao? Come on, Le Zhiyi students

Coordinate | Shenzhen

1? A word "roll" chilled my heart.

At about 5 1 last week, my son called me from school and said, "I won't go home for dinner at noon, and I won't go to school in the afternoon."

I listened to my son's words and asked him calmly, "What's the matter, son? Can you talk to your mother? "

The son said, "I don't want to talk about it." I don't go home at noon anyway. "

I also want to pick him up at noon. We had dinner outside, but before I could say it, my son hung up.

I thought to myself: No matter what happens (I know it's no big deal, it's just trivial things that upset me, and it's not the first time he said he didn't want to go to school), I'll pick him up at school at noon and take him out for lunch.

If he can tell me what happened, I'll see how the situation develops. If he doesn't want to tell me, I won't be forced.

If he really doesn't want to go home at noon, then I respect him and just go to school on time in the afternoon.

But I never expected that after I went, I would come back sad all the way. .....

I waited for him at the school gate early, waiting for about 20 minutes, and finally saw him talking and laughing with his classmates.

I let out a cry, "brother, I'll pick you up right away. Shall we go out for dinner? "

He glanced at me sideways and snapped angrily, "Get out!" "Then go with your classmates.

I was stunned by his sudden "roll", which blurred my eyes with tears.

Vaguely, he walked to a big tree in front of him and stopped for two seconds. He looked back at me and then went on walking with his classmates.

I feel very painful inside. I don't understand what I did wrong. Did I offend him? What did I do to him?

Thinking about memories all the way: it seems that there is no, no!

In addition, in the past week, I worked hard to go to school to clean with him every day (I was punished by my teacher for littering last week and asked my parents to accompany me). Is this all my fault?

I feel particularly uncomfortable. I want to know whether my devotion and love for him are worth it.

I rode my motorcycle back, tears streaming down my face. My eyes were glued to my glasses, I could hardly see the road, and I almost ran into a truck in front.

I came home sad all the way, my heart ached and my brain couldn't think.

I thought, okay, you let me out, and you do this to me? I really don't want to talk to you anymore. I can do whatever I want. I'll pick up my sister from school early, call my husband, and we'll go out for a few days. Lock the house and don't answer the phone. How do you live?

However, when my mood gradually calmed down, I felt that my son didn't mean to tell me to get out.

Deep down, he doesn't want to do this to me. We usually have a good relationship between mother and son.

Then what made him do this to me? Did I come at a bad time? He wants to declare autonomy? Or something else?

2

When my mood was completely calm, I knew that my previous thoughts were an irresponsible escape. What should I do? what can I do?

After thinking for a moment, I think we should give him a heavy slap and remind him to respect his elders.

I rehearsed the scene of slapping him in my mind, and I already felt his stunned expression and various possible emotional reactions.

After I figured it out, I was relieved and it was no longer difficult.

At that moment, I clearly knew that I wanted to slap him hard, not to retaliate against him for venting my emotions, but to be truly educated.

At three o'clock in the afternoon, the head teacher sent a message saying that my son didn't go to school in the afternoon and asked me if my child was at home.

I replied to the teacher that the child is not at home and I don't know where it is, but please rest assured that there should be no safety problems. I'll look for it.

I didn't expect my son to really go to school. This is the second time that he has played truant. I guess I'll have to slap him at night.

I know my son has nowhere to go at ordinary times, so I like to go to the book city. This time, he should be studying in the book city.

But I rushed to the book city to look everywhere, and I was a little disappointed.

But I am sure in my heart that he should be in a safer place and there will be no problem.

Then I thought of our classmate's home upstairs. He often goes to play. I immediately asked my classmate's mother. She said: At noon, both children played games in their home, but later they both went to school.

I looked for some small shops around the school, but I didn't see them. Then I stopped looking for them. I replied to the teacher: I haven't found my son yet. I don't think I can come to school this afternoon.

But I'm sure my son will come home at night. When I got home, I found that the scooter I had left in front of my house was gone. My son likes riding a scooter when he goes out. I'm more sure that my son is nearby.

I do my own thing with peace of mind and look forward to the arrival of the night!

At 6: 30, when I was going to pick up my sister from class, I found that the scooter had left it in front of my house. I knew my son was back, and now he is probably playing games at his classmate's house upstairs.

I immediately checked with my parents upstairs to make sure it was there.

I told my husband all the details and asked him to cooperate with me at night. Don't be angry.

I was busy cooking dinner when I brought my sister back. My husband came back to play with my sister, and everything was going step by step.

When I was preparing to cook, I asked my husband to go upstairs and ask my son to come down for dinner. My son came down soon and looked at me warily as soon as I entered the door.

Me: "Brother is back? Hurry to take a shower, wash your hands and get ready for dinner! " The son replied and ran quickly into the bathroom.

We usually eat with a smile. I asked intentionally or unintentionally, "Did my brother eat at noon?"

At first, my son told me that he didn't have lunch. I said, "That must be starving, right? Eat quickly, eat quickly. "

As I said this, I put a piece of chicken in his bowl. The son took two bites of rice and said, "Actually, I had lunch."

I said, "Good, don't starve yourself."

After dinner, I was tidying up, and my son paced back and forth around me from time to time.

Me: "Does my brother want to help my mother wash the dishes?"

Son: "No, hey, why don't you play cards according to the routine?" Don't you want to know why I didn't go to school this afternoon? "

I gave him a casual look and said, "Then why not go to school?"

He stared at me for a few seconds and said, "Forget it, I don't know how to tell you."

three

That's it. I do mine and he plays his.

When I'm all busy, I take a shower with my sister and let her go to the living room to watch TV. I asked my son and husband to go to the room to have a chat.

My son chose to sit on the mat and chat. I squatted down solemnly and looked him straight in the eye: "Come on, son, let's solve your problem today."

"hmm."

Me: "Who am I?"

The son is a little puzzled: "You are my mother."

I asked again, "Who am I?"

Son: "You are my mother."

Me: "Good! You also know that I am your mother, not bad! "

I raised my hand to slap, and my son responded quickly and immediately covered his face with his hand.

I tried my best to break his hand, and then slapped him quickly without hesitation.

My son covered his face with his hand, tears swirled in his eyes and looked at me with a complicated expression.

Me:

"At noon, you said you didn't want to go home. I'm afraid you have no food. I was going to take you out for dinner. But when I saw you, you gave me a sentence-get out and go away.

I'm your mother. Do you know how sad I am when you talk to me like this? I told you how I felt at that time and how I felt about going home.

Do you know a word called respect? Is there a saying of respecting the old and loving the young?

I am your mother, and I am your elder. Is it a respect for me to roll a word? Do you hate me so much? "

Son: "No, I don't hate you!" " "

Me: "remember this slap and respect your parents, elders and teachers at all times!" " Remember? "

My son wanted to cry a little: "Remember!"

Me: You didn't go to school this afternoon, did you?

Son: "Yes!"

I waved my palm on the other side and hit it mercilessly. When my son saw something bad, he quickly blocked it with his hand.

My palm tilted to the middle and slapped him in the mouth and nose. My son finally burst into tears.

Me: "The national law stipulates that every citizen in our country must receive nine-year compulsory education. You have no reason or excuse to play truant. If you encounter difficulties at school, you should try to solve them instead of playing truant. Remember this slap for me! "

At that time, dad said:

"Son, you know, my mother and I love you very much. What you did today was really wrong. No wonder your mother is so angry.

However, I owe you, and I'm here to review myself: because of my work, I seldom accompany you and communicate with you, and I may often lose my temper with you.

This is my fault, too. I will spend as much time with you as possible in the future. Can we talk it over? "

The son nodded silently.

To my surprise, he stayed where he was, didn't stare at us as maliciously as I thought, and then rushed out of the house.

Dad:

"In fact, I discussed it with your mother a few days ago. I think you have grown up. I believe you can manage yourself and arrange your own affairs.

So I decided to give you the right to manage and use the iPad. I believe you can arrange your own schedule, but we have certain supervision rights.

However, you must remember that the most important thing for you at this stage is learning. Would you like to? "

Son: "Yes!"

Me: "Well, I have another question: Where did you stay all afternoon?"

Son: "I have been in the Book City. I saw you looking for me everywhere, and I hid. "

Me: "So today's things have been solved. I hope this is my last slap. I hope you will always remember these two slaps. " Use these two slaps to bid farewell to the arrogant and willful you before and reopen a better and brand-new you! "

Then, I called my sister in and we started the first serious family meeting.

The atmosphere of the family meeting was very good. Everyone put down their emotional burdens, showed their true selves and communicated happily.

When I was sleeping, my sister asked me to sleep with her for a while, and then I went into their room with my brother and sister.

After closing the door, my brother hugged me and said, "mom, I'm sorry!" " "

I also hugged him and said, "Mom knows what you mean. Let's start over and be better ourselves, shall we? "

"Mm-hmm."

four

My brother sleeps in the lower berth and my sister sleeps in the upper berth. When we all lay down, my brother said, "Mom, do you want to hear why I don't want to go to school?"

"Well, let's hear it."

Brother:

"Because the students in our class are not good to me and the teacher is not good to me.

Once, someone in the classroom was holding candy, and she didn't give it to me. Everyone in our group has one, but I don't.

I usually give what my classmates borrow from me. Once, I forgot to bring my dictation book. When I borrowed a piece of paper from someone, he wouldn't give it to me.

Once in a Taoist class, the teacher had something for us to study by ourselves, but everyone was talking and arguing. Then the head teacher came and said, who took the lead in making trouble? My classmates pointed at me, and I didn't make trouble. They all blame me.

There is another person who always sits on my desk, but when I ask him, he doesn't want to go down. He said that my academic performance was not good, and coming to school was just a place.

And so-and-so, he robbed me of something I played with, but he came to scold me if it was broken ... "

I have been quietly listening, let him tell all the unhappiness in his heart.

I wanted to wait for him to finish, then go down and hug him hard to soothe his wronged and injured heart.

However, as he talked, he didn't know when he had fallen asleep.

Now I know that there is a fragile heart hidden under my son's unruly appearance.

The next morning, after my son got up, the first thing I did was hug him:

"Son, mom listened to everything you said last night and knew that you had a lot of grievances at school. If those things happen to mom, mom will be very sad and annoying.

But think about it: others did it, and we can't control and change it. Even if we hate it, we can't change what they want to do. Only by changing yourself can we control it.

Only when we are stronger than them, will they dare not treat you like that, don't you think? "

The son said yes.

Me: "Also, think about it again. In fact, many students are very kind to you. For example, the last time someone lent you a small fan, someone lent you a book, and your monitor gave you a beautiful pendant ... I know a lot, but there may be more I don't know, don't you think? "

The son thought for a moment: "You seem to be right."

Me: "Well, you've said goodbye to the past, so let's forget the past and start over!" " "

My son's mood immediately returned to the present.

I know that in the future, I will be ready to help my son build a strong heart.

Although I seldom slap my son twice, I firmly believe that those two slaps will make everything better and better on the premise of the connection of love!

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