The man I am looking for is selfish, stingy, and not a human being. Last time his cell phone message rang, and I accidentally looked at it in front of me, and found that he was not talking to women.

If you are a woman and can be so realistic, then you are not far from happiness

I didn’t get married until I was 31, and I am living a good life now. I have been diving in Tianya for many years and have read many tragic stories of sisters. I have also experienced several very painful relationships. Spending time with loved ones and their families is great right now. I think I still have some experience that I can learn from sisters who are still groping on their relationship journey. I don’t want to boast that I am living a good life, but I think we need to learn to grow from our own mistakes, and we must not fall into the same pit that we have fallen into again and again. I hope sisters can use these experiences in love and marriage.

1. The most important thing is that girls still have to work hard to make themselves better, from ability to appearance.

Taiwan’s famous advertising slogan: Serious women are the most beautiful. Everyone has the right to choose their own lifestyle, but they must be serious about themselves, their work, and their life. Even if such a woman is not naturally beautiful, she still has a kind of confident and calm beauty. Only such a kind of beauty can fight against time. , which is also the type that good men appreciate. Those who play with life and play with men will eventually be played with.

Maybe many sisters are not very good at work. Being able to clean themselves up is also a great advantage. No matter what, in reality, men tend to judge people by their appearance first. Not all men only love the most beautiful women. Most men have a liking for clean and refreshing women.

2. A good man has requirements for himself but no requirements for women.

For any man who is muddle-headed about his job but has many demands on his girlfriend, it is better to stay away from him. Such a man has the highest chance of becoming a venomous man after marriage. When we sisters get married, the least we ask for is to be respected by our husbands. A man who thinks he has the right to talk to his wife is not a good marriage partner.

3. The most important thing when marrying is character and character.

Similar personalities, similar outlooks on life and money are the best guarantees for married life. Different personalities, two people can't get along with each other on weekdays. Even if the whole world recognizes them as a golden boy and a beautiful girl, a perfect match, they can't marry. After all, you have to spend most of your life with him. Know.

4. A man who says he is not worthy of you from the beginning will never be worthy of you in the future.

For some outstanding girls, they will always meet some men who seem to have potential. You change yourself and give everything for him, but he says that you are too good to him, and his (educational qualifications , money, ability, status, appearance, etc.) are not worthy of you. The examples of many sisters around me prove that a man who has no self-confidence and can only rely on your submission to date will not be kind to you in the future, and your excellence will only make him feel more inferior.

5. Before entrusting someone with your life, you should take a look at his family.

It’s not about how much money his family has, but whether his family is harmonious and caring and courteous. If a man in the family beats a woman and everyone ignores it and pretends not to see it, the family will not care about your life or death in the future. Every family has shortcomings. You need to ask yourself about your boyfriend's attitude. A man who is blindly loyal will have limited respect for his wife.

6. A man who is tight on himself and his girlfriend is not interesting. A man who is loose on himself but tight on his girlfriend must be selfish and the last person to marry.

Money is the most revealing thing about a man’s essence and feelings. Sisters, love is not about money, but if he makes you feel wrong about money, you should think carefully about whether he is suitable for you. When you are in a relationship, you should spend money normally. Men who make it clear from the beginning that they want AA are too calculating and too afraid of losing money. In a future marriage, there will be many sacrifices to be made, and such men will be the first to run away.

7. Don’t let a man hit you. If you are hit once, you must break up with him. Don't want a man who is a playboy and has a lot of troubles. You must break up with him once you find him. As the old saying goes, if you continue to break things, you will suffer chaos.

8. Girls in love must have their own bottom line.

You must never give up your dignity, insult your parents, or abandon your job just because you love him. A good relationship and marriage must be a win-win situation, not a one-sided sacrifice and fulfillment.

9. When you meet a man you like, you must be brave enough to pursue him.

Unrequited love is the most hurtful and the most fruitless.

10. Say something clearly.

If you have any ideas, speak them out. Don’t let men guess. If you can communicate, your life will be happier. Failure to communicate means that your happiness is not guaranteed. I don't think any man enjoys guessing his girlfriend's thoughts. It's a real shame to lose a good man for this reason.

11. Don’t act virtuous in front of a man from the beginning.

If he feels at ease with your efforts but does not know how to repay you, he is suspected of being a chauvinist. If you relax over time and don't do as well as before, he will be very hurt and feel that you lied to him or that you don't love him anymore. It's better to express your love appropriately from the beginning, give him a chance to show it, and let him do something for you. To be honest, men are more impressed by what they pay. The more he does for you and the more he pays, the more he will miss you and the more reluctant he will be to you. On the contrary, he is relatively indifferent to your efforts and his gains. In a marriage, a man who often does housework and takes care of children is much less likely to give up on the marriage. It is precisely because he has worked hard to build this family that he is even more reluctant to give up. Many cruel and cruel men have a most virtuous and selfless woman who is silently giving. I finally decided to marry my boyfriend because he told me: I am very worried about you. I am always afraid that you will have a bad life or something will happen to you. As long as I don’t see you, I will be very worried about you. . His dedication and my gratitude are the best way for both of us to get along.

12. When it is broken, it is broken.

Everyone is likely to make mistakes, but if you make the same mistake again and again, there is something wrong with you. Many sisters say "I have been with him for N years", "He is my first man", "I have aborted N children for him", "I have paid for..." "I am... years old" "And if you endure living with a man who doesn't treat you well, you will be hurt in the end. A friend of mine once said to me: Nothing in this world remains unchanged. It either gets better or worse. In short, nothing remains constant. This sentence directly prompted me to get out of a bad relationship. Because I know that if it changes, that relationship will only get worse, and I will be hurt more in the future. My bravery is the most solid foundation for my good life now.

13. Love because of love, not for a beautiful wedding or a dream of luxurious life.

All happiness comes with a price, but don’t let some price ruin your life. Young girls are easily blinded by vanity, but in a real marriage, the man who can cover you with the quilt you kicked off at night is the man worth entrusting to your life.

14. Cherish a man who truly loves you and treats you well.

A good man will treat you well in a way that is truly beneficial to you, not to indulge you, nor to restrain you in the name of loving you. There are very few men like this. If you meet them, you must cherish them. Young men tend to love their girlfriends in an innocent way. He may be immature, but his love is real. Don't give up lightly. Only when you have more experience in society will you know how precious a sincere heart is.

15. Everything comes in time.

There are many good men in this world who are struggling to find their other half. Not all men only love virgins, not all men care about your previous marriage, and not all men care about your age and education. In many good marriages, what a man loves is his woman’s stupidity, innocence, round figure, or the mole at the corner of her mouth. He will cherish your injuries even more, and your bravery will make him respect you even more. Therefore, even if you are hurt, you must be like Kim Sam Soon and love bravely as if you have never been hurt. Only when you open yourself up first will the world let you go.

16. Don’t give your heart to a man’s initial pursuit.

Both good men and bad men will care about you at the beginning of their pursuit of you, pick you up and drop you off, send you text messages, and take care of you when you are sick. Don't fall in love as soon as someone treats you well. Think about it, look at it more, and then make a decision. Generally, four months is enough contact for you to understand him. Online communication does not count, no matter how long-term online contact is, real life is meaningful. You have to eat, go shopping, and do things with him to understand him. You know whether you live a happy life or not. Many times, it's not men who are deceiving us, it's us who are deceiving ourselves.

17. If you love him, accept him as he is now, and don’t imagine how he will change.

If he can change it, of course it would be best. Otherwise, just think about whether you can accept it. Every shortcoming before marriage will be magnified after marriage. If he smokes and you love him, try to accept it. There are too few men who quit smoking after marriage. The same goes for other disadvantages.

18. Men over the age of 30 often have fixed living habits and lifestyles, and it is unlikely that they will completely change for a woman. He needs you to adapt to him. On the contrary, young men are more willing to change for the woman they love.

This is completely my personal feeling, it may be wrong, please forgive me.

Looking back, I have made all the above mistakes. Fortunately, I am a "reckless woman" by nature. I dare to love and leave, so I have the marriage that satisfies me now. Love and marriage are the biggest tests in a girl's life, and most of our growth comes from this. Some of what I wrote are commonplaces, but every one of them is a real lesson that I cannot bear to look back on. In the future, I will tell these to my daughter as a mother's blessing to her children.