What does this joke mean... A parrot is always full of swear words and refuses to change his words despite repeated admonitions. The owner got angry and put it in the refrigerator

Looking for the answer, I found "Men's Restroom".

9. In the early morning of the first day after a couple got married, the family got up and washed their faces. The bride respectfully said to her mother-in-law: "Mother-in-law, please wash (wash) first." After that, the bride said again He said to the groom: "My mother-in-law is dead, how about you die?" After a pause, he said, "My mother-in-law and you are both dead, and I will die last." After hearing this, the mother-in-law turned pale and could not say a word. The bride then said: "Mother-in-law, why are you not dead yet?"

10. An old Putian woman was selling sugar cane on the roadside. A bus stopped and a foreigner in the car came to the old woman's stall. I bought sugar cane before. I had just weighed the sugar cane and before I paid, the car started. The old lady urged: "Hurry up, give me your money, and I will marry you (cane)." The outsider was so frightened that he didn't even take the sugar cane and quickly got into the car.

11. A country girl came to the supermarket, and the waiter greeted her enthusiastically: "Miss, what do you want?" The girl said: "I want your life (noodles), pig grandson (bamboo shoots)." < /p>

12. Chunhua met a friend who was shopping with her son. She hurriedly came up to say hello and praised: "This little wolf boy (boy) is so cute."

13. 1 It was class in a rural primary school, and the teacher walked into the classroom: "Stand (on) class." The students said in unison: "Good old and die (teacher)!" The teacher said: "Students who vomit blood, good on their death (on) early!"

14. Two country girls came back from the city. It was getting late. They saw a truck approaching and waved to the truck. The driver stuck his head out and one of the girls said: "Comrade, we can do this." (Sit in) your wife (car)?" The driver said angrily: "Who wants you to be my wife?" The other girl quickly said: "It doesn't matter, we are very close." The driver was very angry. The car drove away, and I thought: "Who will go with you personally?"

15. The village chief said at the village meeting: "Rabbits, shrimps, pickles are too expensive, I don't want pickles, I want pigs." Hoof. "Translated from his dialect into Mandarin: Comrades and fellow villagers, this is a meeting, don't talk, please pay attention.

When my friend and I first moved, there was no TV at home and we were very bored. We pretended there was a TV on the table, and then the two of us pretended to have remote controls in our hands and could change the channel. This bastard kept changing the channel. I told him, but he didn't listen, and then we started fighting.

The teacher asked Xiao Ming a question in class, but Xiao Ming stood up but remained silent.

Teacher: Xiao Ming?

Teacher: Xiao Ming

Teacher: Xiao Ming! What's the matter with you? Do you know the answer? At least give it a squeak!

Xiao Ming: Zhi~

Three little rabbits poop

The first one is long.

The second one is spherical.

The third one is actually triangular.

Asked, it replied: I squeezed it with my hands.

Zhu Bajie was making out with Chang'e on the moon. Suddenly a black shadow passed by. Zhu Bajie hurriedly picked up the nail rake and chased him out. After a while, he came back and said: Damn it, Yang Liwei ......

A man kept a parrot, which was so powerful that it killed all the other birds kept with it.

Later the owner brought back an eagle and placed it next to it. When the owner came to take a look, there were parrot feathers hanging outside the cage.

The master said: "I won't do it this time."

But when I looked carefully, I saw that the eagle was dead, and the parrot was naked and said: "This grandson It's so amazing, I can't beat Ya Ting without taking off my shirt.

"

Have you ever heard the joke "The big pig says yes, and the little pig says no?" Most people will answer no

I was playing CS in an Internet cafe today, and there were two non-professionals not far away. The mainstream was playing Jin 5, and they were pressing the keyboard! I was very unhappy!

So, I also started pressing the keyboard! I pressed hard! Pressed hard! I pressed faster than them! Than they They still rang!

They couldn't help but look over, and I deliberately glanced at them contemptuously! Their expressions changed and they glared at me fiercely! I immediately stared back!

They continued to play Jin 5 with livid faces, but the noise exceeded me!

How could I accept it? So, I simply slapped the keyboard with my palm! Hit it hard! Hit it hard!

The two guys lost their enthusiasm at first sight and started hitting the keyboard! The noise was louder than mine again!

How could I give up? Immediately hit the keyboard with my fists! Hit it hard! Hit it hard!

The two people looked at each other and started hitting the keyboard! The sound exceeded me again! I didn’t give up! I ripped off the keyboard! Throw it directly to the ground! I stepped on it hard! Step hard!

Everyone in the Internet cafe gave me the warmest applause! Those two non-mainstream people were dumbfounded and at a loss!

However, when I provoked After looking around, they were also angry! They also tore off the keyboard! Throw it on the ground and crush it to pieces! Then they looked at me provocatively!

At this time, the network administrators of the Internet cafe Surrounded them! A network administrator looked at the keyboard that was trampled to pieces by them, and slapped him! Then the network administrators swarmed up and beat the two non-mainstream people!

Finally, two The non-mainstream people were lying on the ground. One of the non-mainstream people pointed at me and asked weakly: "Why don't you... hit him?"

A network administrator kicked him: "He is beating him." CS, I brought my own keyboard!"

One day on the bus, a woman left her seat to buy a ticket. When she came back, she found that her seat was occupied by another woman. So I was very reluctant and said loudly: It's not possible to lay eggs, but occupying the nest is very fast. The woman sitting on the seat heard it, stood up quickly, and said with a smile: I'm sorry for delaying you in laying eggs!

A man kept a parrot, which was so powerful that it killed all the other birds kept with it.

Later, the owner brought back an eagle and placed it with it. , when the owner came to see it, there were parrot feathers hanging outside the cage.

The owner said: "I won't do it this time." "

But after a closer look, the eagle was dead, and the parrot was naked and said: "This grandson is really powerful. He really can't beat Ya Ting if he doesn't take off his shirt." "

A driver drove a truck full of hens and teased his parrot while driving. A beautiful girl hit the truck. The driver put the parrot in the truck box with the hens and asked the beautiful girl to sit on it. In the cab. After driving for a while, the driver tentatively asked the beauty: "Can I kiss you?" "The beauty shook her head very shyly and said, "No. After waiting for a while, the driver reluctantly asked again: "Can I give you a hug?" The beauty still shook her head and said, "No." The driver said angrily: "If it doesn't work, get off." "After driving for a while, the driver felt that what he was doing was very ungentlemanly, so he went back and asked the beautiful woman to get in the car. But after driving for a while, the driver asked again without giving up: "Can I kiss you?" The beauty still shook her head, "Can I give you a hug?" The beauty still shook her head, "If it doesn't work, go down." "After repeating this three times, we finally arrived at the chicken farm. The driver opened the car and saw that there were not many hens left. The parrot picked up one of the hens and asked, "Can I kiss the beauty?" "The hen shook her head desperately, and the parrot asked again: "Can I hug the beauty? The hen still shook her head. The parrot said: "If not, go down." "The hen was thrown out of the car...

The little white rabbit was walking in the forest. When he met the big bad wolf, he came up and gave the little white rabbit two The big-eared post said, "I asked you not to wear a hat." The little white rabbit was aggrieved and withdrew.

The next day, she jumped out of the house wearing a hat and met the big boy again. The gray wolf came up and gave the little white rabbit two big mouths and said, "I'll let you wear a hat."

Rabbit was depressed. After thinking for a long time, he finally decided to complain to Tiger, the king of the forest.

After explaining the situation, Tiger said, "Okay, I understand. This I will handle the matter, just trust the organization."

That same day, the tiger found his buddy, the big bad wolf. "It's not right for you to do this. It's making it difficult for me." After saying that, he wiped the cigarette ashes falling on the table: "Do you think this is okay? You can say, Tutu, come here and find me a piece of meat." Go! She asked for a fat one, and you said you wanted a thin one. Then you could beat her up, Tutu. I’m looking for a woman. She’s looking for a plump one, and you say you like a slim one. She’s looking for a slim one, and you’re looking for a plump one. You can beat her properly and forcefully.” The big bad wolf nodded frequently and clapped his hands, and his respect for the tiger once again reached a new peak. Unexpectedly, the above guidance work was overheard by the little white rabbit who was weeding the tiger's house outside the window. I feel this hatred in my heart.

The next day, the little white rabbit went out again. What a coincidence, the big bad wolf came towards him. The Big Bad Wolf said: "Rabbit, come here and find me a piece of meat." Rabbit said: "Then, do you want a fat one or a thin one?" After hearing this, the Big Bad Wolf's heart sank. Another joy, I said to myself, luckily there is Plan B. He then said: "Tutu, find me a woman quickly." Tutu asked: "So, do you like plump ones or slim ones?" The big bad wolf was silent for 2 seconds, raised his hand and said more I gave Tutu two big-eared posts. "Damn, I asked you not to wear a hat."

The little white rabbit jumped to the bakery and asked: "Boss, do you have a hundred buns?"

Boss: "Ah, I'm so sorry, there aren't that many"

"That's it..." The little white rabbit walked away dejectedly.

The next day, the little white rabbit jumped to the bakery and asked, "Boss, do you have a hundred buns?"

Boss: "Sorry, there are still none."

"That's it..." The little white rabbit walked away dejectedly.

On the third day, the little white rabbit jumped to the bakery, "Boss, do you have a hundred buns?"

The boss said happily: "Yes. Yes, we have a hundred buns today!”

Little White Rabbit took out the money: “Great, I’ll buy two!”

The primary school student, I confessed my love to the teacher I had a crush on for a long time. The teacher said it was wrong, but he didn’t listen. Finally, the teacher couldn't bear it anymore and said: I don't want children. The primary school student said: I will be careful! ".

A certain mental hospital heard that the leader was coming to the hospital to inspect the situation, so the director convened a meeting with the patients.

The director said: "This afternoon, There are very important leaders coming to visit, and everyone should go to the door to welcome them. During the welcome, all the patients stood on both sides of the hospital gate and stood neatly. When I coughed, everyone applauded together, the more enthusiastically the better; When stamping your feet, you must all stop, and no one can make a mistake. As long as everyone is ready,

I can give you meat buns to eat tonight. As long as one person messes up, everyone will have no buns to eat. Remember

? "The patients in the audience shouted together: "Remember! "

That afternoon, the leader arrived on time. When he stepped into the door, the welcoming patients were already standing at the door.

At this time, as the director coughed, All the patients applauded and the atmosphere was very warm. Infected by the warm atmosphere, they applauded with everyone and walked into the hospital.

In the hospital, the dean stamped his foot, and all the applause stopped. It was very neat. Only this leader was still applauding with a smile on his face

The dean was very satisfied. Suddenly, a sick man as strong as Schwarzenegger emerged from the welcoming crowd. He strode up to the leader, gave him a big slap in the face, and shouted angrily - —“You don’t want to eat steamed buns anymore? ! ! ! ”

There were three people competing in marksmanship, with a black man holding something as a target.

The first man placed an apple on the black man’s head, then raised his hand and shot the apple to pieces 10 meters away. He blew the gun and said: I 'm Zorro!

The second man put a cherry on the black man's head, and then, 50 meters away, he raised his hand and shot the cherry to pieces. He blew on the muzzle of the gun and said: I' m007

The third man put a sesame seed on the black man’s head, then raised his hand and shot the black man’s head from a distance of 100 meters, and he also blew The muzzle said: I'm sorry...

A scientist arrived at the Antarctic and encountered a group of penguins. He asked one of them: "What do you do every day?" The penguin said: "Eat, sleep and play beans."

Later he met a little penguin, which looked very cute, and asked it: "Kid, what do you do every day?" The little penguin said: "Eat and sleep." The scientist was stunned, and then asked: "Why don't you play Doudou?"

The little penguin said: "Because I It’s Doudou.”

The most hilarious name in the country~~Don’t laugh! !

According to the name query system of the Ministry of Public Security, the most hilarious names in the country~~

Liu Chan Lai Yuejing (still a boy)

Fan Jianji Congliang Fantong

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Xia Jianren, Zhu Yiqun, Qin Shousheng (thanks to his parents for figuring it out)

Pang Guang, Du Qi, Yan Wei, Shengjin

Strengthen his roots, Shen Jingbing, Du Ziteng

Ranked no. One: Shi Zhenxiang

I recommend some more classic Flash to the poster!

1. Bullying Miss 1860

Viewing address:

2. Xiao Cui’s suicide note

Watching address:

3. China Mobile VS China Unicom

Watching address:

4. China Unicom VS Mobile

Watching address:

5. Classic Pig Dialogue

Watching address:

Chinese Humor King:

< p>China Entertainment Network:

Haha Paradise;

Haha Comics Network:

Rundong Network:

Youyou Joke Network: < /p>

Coke Bar:

Hilarious slips of the tongue

Chinese Laughter Collection

Non-children’s jokes

Ancient jokes

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Campus Jokes

Celebrity Humor

Foreign Jokes

Modern Jokes

Humorous Essays

Joke Collection

VV Joke Station

Examination Jokes

Classic Humor Joke Network

Qingdao Joke Network:

Changle Joke Network:

Quanzhou Joke Station:

Happy Man Joke Network:

Sb Joke Network:

YAHOO! Joke:

Xinchao.com joke:

Reference material: compiled by the little fool messenger! Strongly despise copying and stealing other people's achievements

Don't be anxious, the best will always appear when you least expect it.