Funny jokes about poetry

1. Funny ancient poems and jokes, it is best for children to read Su Dongpo and Su Dongpo. Before, when two primary school students were worshipping Confucius Temple, one student looked at the word "Confucius Temple" on the plaque and read: "Great Temple."

Student B corrected him and said, "Don't read the Temple, read the Temple." Two people were arguing when a young monk came out of the temple and they hurried forward to ask questions.

The young monk said, "I'm going to Huaqi, and I don't have time to listen to your argument." Hearing this, the two pupils thought it was wrong. The monk is a vegetarian. Why did he say it was neat? "So three people argue.

At this moment, a teacher with a dictionary came outside. Three people stopped together and asked him to comment on who was right and who was wrong.

The teacher said, "Don't be busy, let me check the lyrics." Hearing this, the three men were angry and funny, and they all took hold of Mr. Wang: "You are a teacher, and you have made a mistake. This is a net mistake.

Come on, let's go to court! "Four people came to the county government with the plaque of" Sai Dongpo ". The county magistrate was originally an uneducated guy, but he was hard and elegant.

When he asked what had happened, he recited a few poems: officially, it was called "Saidongpi", and there was a strange temple in the Wen Dynasty. Both the big temple and the temple could be used, and the two scholars went together. Mr. Wang should check the music score. You two ask me separately, and the monk might as well finish it.

I'm not Su Dongpo. A few interesting things about Dongpo and Fo Yin Dongpo is no stranger to Fo Yin.

Su Shi was demoted to Huangzhou. In the past, making friends was to preserve our sanity and cut off contacts, either avoiding or perfunctory. Su Shi's greatest hobby in his life is making friends except poetry, and he can't even tell which is more important.

Such a man who was born to make friends suffered many setbacks in a few days. He went to prison for poetry and abandoned his relatives. I came to Huangzhou with fear and depression, wandering around at night and drinking to drown my sorrows. Now so many good friends in the past are left unattended.

If this is the case, Su Shi will not be Su Dongpo. In Huangzhou, he finally let go of the arrogance of young people, and his soul instantly glowed with charming heartstrings, which shone into the eyes of China people from generation to generation. No one can hide the glory before and after Chibi. "Huangzhou made Su Shi, and Su Shi also made Huangzhou".

Su Dongpo is not Su Shi. He believes that Su Shi can only become the real Su Dongpo if he is sublimated in Huangzhou by Fo Yin on Lushan Mountain. Stop talking nonsense. Here are some interesting stories about them. They are interesting, but they reveal a little wisdom everywhere.

On a boring day, Su Shi and Fo Yin visited the river by boat. Su Shi smiled and pointed to a dog gnawing at a bone on the river bank.

Master Fo Yin reacted quickly, took out a fan engraved with Dongpo lay poems and threw it into the river. They laughed at each other.

Su Shixiao refers to the dog gnawing at the bone on the river bank, which is the first couplet: the dog (monk) gnawing at the bone on the river bank! Master Fo Yin threw a fan engraved with Dongpo's Buddhist poem into the river. That's right: flowing Dongpo's poem (corpse)! One day, Su Shi asked buddhist nun to put on a straw hat and clogs and go to Fo Yin to get something. Buddhist nun asked: What does the master want? Su Shi said: The old monk will know at a glance.

Buddhist nun went to Fo Yin and said, Master asked me to get something. Fo Yin asked: Take what? Buddhist nun said, Master said you would know as soon as you saw me.

Fo Yin looked at buddhist nun and packed a bag for buddhist nun to take away. Buddhist nun went home and handed the parcel to Su Shi. He asked, Sir, is this a parcel? Su Shi said with a smile, exactly! What is this? This is tea.

Buddhist nun wore a straw hat and a pair of clogs, hiding a riddle: tea. There is nothing to do when grazing in Sandongpo. Su Shi went to Jinshan Temple to visit Master Fo Yin. I didn't expect the master to be away, so a little novice monk opened the door.

Su Shi proudly said, "Where is the bald donkey? ! "。 Little novice monk pointed to the distance and replied, "Dongpo eats grass!" " "What do you think? .

2. Funny ancient poems and jokes, preferably Su Dongpo and Su Dongpo seen by children.

In the past, when two students were worshipping the Confucius Temple, one student looked at the word "Confucius Temple" on the plaque and said, "Great Temple." Student B corrected him and said, "Don't read the Temple, read the Temple."

Two people were arguing when a young monk came out of the temple and they hurried forward to ask questions. The young monk said, "I'm going to Huaqi, and I don't have time to listen to your argument." Hearing this, the two pupils thought it was wrong. The monk is a vegetarian. Why did he say it was neat? "So three people argue.

At this moment, a teacher with a dictionary came outside. Three people stopped together and asked him to comment on who was right and who was wrong. The teacher said, "Don't be busy, let me check the lyrics." Hearing this, the three men were angry and funny, and they all took hold of Mr. Wang: "You are a teacher, and you have made a mistake. This is a net mistake. Let's go to court! "

Four people came to the county government with the plaque of "Sai Dongpo". The county magistrate was originally an uneducated guy, but he was hard and elegant. When he asked what had happened, he recited these poems:

This official is called "Saidongpi", and there are strange temples in the Wen Dynasty.

Both temples are ok. Two scholars go together.

Teacher Wang wants to check the music score. You two ask me separately.

Monks might as well go together. I'm not Su Dongpo.

Some interesting stories about Dongpo and Fo Yin.

Compared with Fo Yin, Dongpo is no stranger to everyone. Su Shi was demoted to Huangzhou. In the past, making friends was to preserve our sanity and cut off contacts, either avoiding or perfunctory. Su Shi's greatest hobby in his life is making friends except poetry, and he can't even tell which is more important. Such a man who was born to make friends suffered many setbacks in a few days. He went to prison for poetry and abandoned his relatives. I came to Huangzhou with fear and depression, wandering around at night and drinking to drown my sorrows. Now so many good friends in the past are left unattended. If this is the case, Su Shi will not be Su Dongpo. In Huangzhou, he finally let go of the arrogance of young people, and his soul instantly glowed with charming heartstrings, which shone into the eyes of China people from generation to generation. No one can hide the glory before and after Chibi. "Huangzhou made Su Shi, and Su Shi also made Huangzhou". Su Dongpo is not Su Shi. He believes that Su Shi can only become the real Su Dongpo if he is sublimated in Huangzhou by Fo Yin on Lushan Mountain. Stop talking nonsense. Here are some interesting stories about them. They are interesting, but they reveal a little wisdom everywhere.

one

Dumb connection

One day, Su Shi and Fo Yin visited the river by boat.

Su Shi smiled and pointed to a dog gnawing at a bone on the river bank.

Master Fo Yin reacted quickly, took out a fan engraved with Dongpo lay poems and threw it into the river.

They laughed at each other.

Su Shixiao refers to the dog gnawing at the bone on the river bank, which is the first couplet: the dog (monk) gnawing at the bone on the river bank!

Master Fo Yin threw a fan engraved with Dongpo's Buddhist poem into the river. That's right: flowing Dongpo's poem (corpse)!

two

A puzzling remark

One day, Su Shi asked buddhist nun to put on a straw hat and clogs and go to Fo Yin to get something.

Buddhist nun asked: What does the master want?

Su Shi said: The old monk will know at a glance.

Buddhist nun went to Fo Yin and said, Master asked me to get something.

Fo Yin asked: Take what?

Buddhist nun said, Master said you would know as soon as you saw me.

Fo Yin looked at buddhist nun and packed a bag for buddhist nun to take away.

Buddhist nun went home and handed the parcel to Su Shi. He asked, Sir, is this a parcel?

Su Shi said with a smile, exactly!

What is this? This is tea. Buddhist nun wore a straw hat and a pair of clogs, hiding a riddle: tea.

three

Dongpo eats grass

In his spare time, Su Shi visited Master Fo Yin in Jinshan Temple. I didn't expect the master to be away, so a little novice monk opened the door.

Su Shi proudly said, "Where is the bald donkey? ! "。

Little novice monk pointed to the distance and replied, "Dongpo eats grass!" " "

What does the landlord think?

3. The sentence about humor 1, I am an onion, standing in the wind and rain, whoever dares to touch my sauce, K is his ancestor. I walked through the south, crossed the north, drank water behind the toilet, ran over my leg on the train track and kissed the pig. what are you reading? Kiss you!

2, Cupid legend: an arrow through the heart represents love at first sight; Two arrows through the heart represent wishful thinking; It is lucky that three arrows represent three lives. . . I am shooting an arrow at you. . . . . Small sample, you just wait to become a hedgehog!

3, don't be crazy with me, my eldest brother Qin Shihuang, don't pretend with me, I have the background of the CPC Central Committee, don't believe you, bin Laden is my uncle, first fried and then poisoned; If you refuse to accept it again, the registered police will be my aunt, and change your account into a pig!

4. A kind person is when others are hungry.

It began to snow in my world. Oh, my God, please don't comb your hair next to me.

6. No matter how ugly you are, you should fall in love and talk about a world full of love.

7. You said you would wait for me to come back. You did it. You found someone to wait with.

8. I struggled with fat and almost didn't sacrifice.

9. Compare wages with wages, think about it, forget it, and stop living.

10 When the devil knocked on the glass in front of your window, the toad was crawling into your bed, the poisonous snake rippled over your head, the earthworm shuttled between your toes, and the centipede crawled into your nostrils. Don't be afraid! I rode a snail to save you! Drive! Drive!

1 1. This may be the short message I sent you in recent days. I hesitate to tell you that I'm going to Japan, and the formalities have been completed. I won't forget you, really! ..... I have bird flu, and I want to infect it.

12, my god! Bless me! Bless those who forget me, don't contact me, don't call, don't send text messages, don't miss me, don't miss me, and the mobile phone falls into the toilet! Amen! By the way, let the water flush!

13, the ship naturally sinks when it hits the bridge.

14, say it out loud if you love me! Hate me and hide it in your heart all your life!

15, I planted a bunch of boyfriends in spring, and now it's autumn. Alas, nothing happened.

16, you once told me that you would love me forever. I understand love, but what is it forever?

17, although I believe in vows of eternal love, I don't necessarily believe you.

18, hope is like fire, disappointment is like smoke, and life is like fire.

19. I'll help you solve the problem that Confucius can't solve.

20. Do all the bad things you can while you are young! A few years later ...

2 1, a man keeps his word-.

I said I wouldn't pay back the money!

What I can't let go must be because I can't have it.

23. Interpretation is a cover-up, and cover-up is a story.

24. One day, I asked you if you were a pig, and you answered no, being beaten-dishonest! The next day, I asked you if you were a pig, and your answer was that you were beaten-not modest! On the third day, I asked you if you were a pig, but you didn't make any noise and were beaten crazy → even if you were a pig, you were still dragging! ! !

If I had a candy, I would give it to you, because I want you to be happy. If I have two sweets, we will each have one, because I want us to be happy together; If I had three kinds of candy, I would give you two, because I hope you have more cavities than me! 26. Tell what you are unhappy about and make everyone happy. 27. I am relieved to know that you are not doing well. 28. If you ignore me again, I will become a steamed stuffed bun. Because "Goubuli steamed stuffed bun"

4. Who has a classic humorous sentence for me? Thanks 1. "The foot of my bed is shining so brightly". The next sentence is "Li Bai's sleeping soundly" ... 2. The next sentence is "Two heads are better than one Zhuge Liang" ... The batch of teachers immediately fainted ... 3. Tao Yuanming's "Five buckets of rice don't bend over", and students dare to write ".

5. "Egrets fly in front of Mount Cisse", and the next sentence is "Tortoise crawls by the river in Dongcun"? 6. "If the sky is affectionate, the sky will be old", and the next sentence "If people are affectionate, they will die early"? 7. "Glowing glass of wine", next sentence "Lots of money and beautiful women" … 8. "Think about the past and think about the future, Jin Ge is an iron horse", and the next sentence "Look at the present and fight" ... 9. That's enough! If relatives and friends in Luoyang ask each other, the students say "Please don't tell him" …… 10/0. "If it's a long-term relationship," the students said, "It's time for two people to get married" 1 1. "I hate less when I use the books", and the students say that "there is not enough money at the end of the month" …18. 14. This is amazing! "Rizhao incense burner gives birth to purple smoke, and Li Bai comes to the bathroom. When Xiao Li flies a knife, Li Bai becomes a little eunuch.

5. Classic funny sentence: You are either two or two, two is there, no three no four.

BBK lighter, I want to order it there, I can only say it's easy.

I curse you for eating only instant noodles with spices.

You said you would love me forever. I was so stupid that I forgot to ask "This life or the next life".

It's very cold. Everyone goes out and puts on the cassock. .

Look up, there are blue sky, white clouds and black wires.

Get up where you fell and fall there forever. I suspect there is a pit there.

The latest movie is released, and it is free to watch.

_ The back waves of the Yangtze River push the front waves, and the front waves die on the beach! _

I count the stars ... Your IQ is almost ... Count the moon.

Don't be infatuated with me, my sister-in-law will be angry.

Houyi, your mother asked you to come out to bask in the sun.

Genius step two, no diapers

When you are unhappy, you take a needle to the supermarket to poke a condom.

Wish LZ all the best.

6. Are there any humorous jokes adapted from poems? 1 Today we are the rising sun, and tomorrow our hearts will be higher than the sky. Today we are a trickle, and tomorrow we will be a big river, roaring and roaring. Today we are eagles leaving the nest, and tomorrow we will fly very high. Today we are flowers in bud, and tomorrow we will be colorful and enchanting. We are who we are, and the red scarf burns on our chest. Please see, tomorrow we will climb mountains and mountains, stir rivers, hold up the modern motherland and fly to the golden goal ... 2. On a beautiful summer night, walk with our dreams. I look up at the stars. I am looking for my dream. I hope to succeed. Look, my dream is flying in the distance. I'm getting closer to the younger one. I fly to the starry sky with my dream. I won't go back with my dream. I am singing for boys and girls. I sing about the morning, I sing about hope, I sing about things that belong to the future, and I sing about the power of growth. My song, fly, fly to the hearts of those young people and find the place where you stay. All the happy or beautiful thoughts that made me tremble like grass turned into sounds.

Fly in all directions, whether it's like a breeze or a piece of sunshine. I lost my adult sadness from the strings, I became young again, my blood flowed rapidly, and I was full of dreams and longing for life. You are a little fox, smart and calculating. What a lovely idea to cheat meat from crows! Serve you right! Crows like singing, croaking and bragging! Besides, he stole the meat, so you can eat it with him. Maybe you will become beautiful after eating this meat! The tail swept the green grass like a red flame wind. I like you, fox. Your cunning is very witty, and your deception is very interesting. No matter what adults say, I like you. In the sky, snowflakes are falling in the north wind and geese are crying under the tree. My brother raised his slingshot and aimed at it ... this made Grandpa Dong angry and made his brother angry.

7. Jokes and humorous sentences 1. The kid next door finally vowed to lose weight-at the graduation job fair, someone said to him, "Sorry, buddy, you blocked my cell phone signal."

Lei Feng did a good deed without leaving a name, but everything was recorded in his diary. 4. I skipped classes too much. I wanted to go to class yesterday. Seeing the professor, the professor was surprised and said, I haven't seen you for so long, and I have grown so big.

Every time I miss a girl, I put a brick on the ground, so there is the Great Wall. 7. Yuanyang played in the water and was drowned by his mother; Fly with me, you fucking fell dead.

8. Pure, fictional, chaotic and beautiful. 9. Happiness is scratching when it itches. Unfortunately, this means it's itchy, but it can't be scratched. More unfortunately, the soul and body have not felt that itch for a long time.

10. Although I can't be a descendant of the rich, I must be an ancestor of the rich. 1 1. God didn't give me much responsibility, but it still made my heart ache and my bones and muscles tired.

12. Who held my hand and made me crazy for half my life; Who, kiss my eyes, cover my half-life displacement. 13. The crowd searched for her for thousands of Baidu, and suddenly looking back, that person still dismissed me.

15. What is happiness? Happiness is that cats eat fish, dogs eat meat, and Altman beats small monsters. 16. Are you a dung ball that was once rolled by a small low-energy dog, a cockroach that was trampled flat, and adopted by a mentally retarded master in Shaolin Temple who is known as a pear flower crushing a begonia? 17. I like the first half of your mother's short story, which is broadcast here today. Please continue to enjoy it at the same time tomorrow. I like the second half of your mother ... 18. The advertisement on the subway: Is it crowded? Buy a car! Advertisements in taxis: Are they blocked? Take the subway! 19. I received a mobile phone message. There is a monkey in the zoo, so ugly that everyone vomits. One day I went there and I threw up. One day you went there and the monkey threw up.

20. Say that money is evil and everyone fishes; Say beauty is a disaster, everyone wants it; It is said that the height is too cold and everyone is climbing; Say that alcohol and tobacco hurt the body and don't quit; Say heaven is the best, don't go! 2 1. Strongly protest against the TV play during the advertising time! 23. Although the famous flowers are taken, I will loosen the soil! 24. Excuse me! I'm already dead! But thank you for coming to see me! See you tonight 12! 25. I drown my sorrows in wine, but I learned to swim in this damn pain. 26. Data show that in 2008, men accounted for 52% of the total population in China, while women accounted for 43%.

27. Do you want to get rich? Do you want to get lucky? Do you want to be an official? Do you want to become famous overnight? Do you want to be young forever? -Stop dreaming and study hard! The fool stole the beggar's wallet and was seen by the blind. The dumb shouted, which startled the deaf. Camels come forward and lame people fly. The wanted man wants to take him to the public security bureau. Asako said, look at my face. 29. Loneliness is a person's carnival, and carnival is the loneliness of a group of people. 3 1. Dreaming about dream of eating spaghetti, I woke up in the morning and found my shoelaces gone! 32. Love is a road, and friends are trees. There is only one road in life, and there are many trees on one road. If you have money, you won't get lost; if you lack money, you will rely on trees; if you are happy, you won't forget your way; when you rest, you will water trees.

33. An iron pestle can be ground into a needle, and a wooden pestle can only be ground into a toothpick. The material is wrong, and it's no use trying again. 34. The green hills remain the same, and the firewood remains the same.

I don't want to eat porridge every day. I went to the vegetable market yesterday. I think I'll continue to eat porridge. 37. My principle is: if people don't attack me, I won't attack; If someone attacks me, I will be angry! 38. I slowly discovered that talents are goblins! Some goblins eat people, but people eat everything. If you catch a leprechaun, maybe you can have a barbecue! 39. After listening to your words, saints study.

42. You see, there are always so many things that make you sad in the world: lack of rain or shine, joys and sorrows, impotence and premature ejaculation.

44. The bombarded head was also combed by lightning. 45. Love is a luxury.

It's like a fox coat in a Paris window, so dazzling and charming, but the price tag on it will wake people up. Love is also a luxury, you can only look at it from a distance, don't fantasize, don't touch it, because it is indispensable to meet the right person at the right time and in the right place.

46. If something goes wrong, look for the reason from yourself first. Don't blame the earth for its lack of gravity when you are constipated. 47. Although I am not very handsome, when I was a child, some people praised my left nostril as an idol.

48. Old advice: Daughter, eat a little to lose weight. 49. Spring is a season of colds and high spirits.

Someone accidentally caught a cold, and someone accidentally fell in love. I belong to the former. 50. I am also an infatuated seed, but it rained ... and I drowned.

5 1. Never leave the wall and pull it out resolutely. I allow you to come into my world, but I will never allow you to walk around in my world.

Even if I were a toad, I would never marry my mother toad. 56. Boys are poor, or they don't know how to struggle: girls are rich, or they are coaxed away by a piece of cake.

When we were young, we often made faces in the mirror. In old age, mirrors are flat. 58. When I have a son named "Shuai", people will say "Shuai Dad!" 6 1. Everyone has at least one dream and one strong reason.

The 62.5-year-old daughter asked her father to do something for her. Dad: "Dad is very tired. Give me a compliment, and I will be refreshed again. "

Daughter: "Lao Zheng!" Dad: "Hey!" Daughter: "Your girl is so beautiful …" 64. If the heart has no place to live, it will wander everywhere! 65. The brain is the noblest organ-because it tells you. 67. Zhuge Liang didn't lead a soldier before he came out of the mountain. Why should I have work experience? ! ! 68. The highest level of work is to watch others go to work and get their own salary.

69. When I was a child, I didn't study. My mother said, "When I grow up, I will let you marry a bachelor who sells pork." Now educate my daughter: "study hard and grow up to marry a bachelor who sells pork."

70. I have lived for more than 20 years and have done nothing for the motherland and the people. Every time I think about it, my heart aches. 7 1. Happy? Can you still feel happy? ! 73. Mom said that it is best not to miss two things in life: the last bus home and a person who loves you deeply.

The important task of post-74.80 is to create post-08. 75. Life is not rehearsed, but broadcast live every day, which not only leads to low ratings, but also low wages.

76. The future is bright, but there is no road. 77. Who says crows are as black as crows? Actually,

8. All humorous sentences are 1: I smile at the sky, and then I go to bed.

2. The cashier said: No change. Here are two plastic bags for you! 3. My advantages are: I am handsome; But my shortcoming is that I am not handsome. 4. What is happiness? Happiness is that cats eat fish, dogs eat meat, and Altman hits small monsters! 5: My life has two sides, A and B, and yours has two sides, S and B. ..

6: I am a fat man, not a clown. 7: If Taiwan Province Province doesn't recover, I won't pass Grade 4! 8: I won't go to work until the sun comes out; If I come out, I'll go back to sleep! 9: Snails run wildly.

10: Picking up girls is like hanging up QQ. Coax her for 2 hours every day, and it will soon be sunny. 1 1: Talking about money doesn't hurt feelings, but talking about love hurts money the most.

12: I curse you for buying instant noodles all your life without seasoning packets. 13: The accountant said, "Come and get paid later. I have no change here. "

14: Can you see my powder? 15: Although you wear cologne, I can still vaguely smell that scum. My name is Yu, and my nickname is Runtu.

17: I am an angel, and I can't go back to heaven because of my weight. 18: once I was on the street, a group of girls stopped me. They said I was handsome, but when I denied it, they hit me and called me hypocritical.

19: it is both house and rotten, and its future is uncertain. 20: make a cup of Sanlu for the client to drink.

2 1: The most mysterious department in history: related departments. There is no denying that mosaic is the biggest obstacle to the progress of human nude art in this century! There are only two things I can't do in my life: neither this nor that.

24: People have backgrounds, and I have backgrounds. 25: The ideal of meat, the life of cabbage.

26: White Horse … Where did you die! Did you lose your prince and dare not come to see me? 27: Did your mother throw people away and raise the placenta when she gave birth to you? 28: Don't treat shrimp as seafood.

29: Yangzhou fried rice, please, with more chopped green onion and less salt, and an egg, packed and taken away. 30: Your mother is your father's cousin? 3 1: I have to read the Forbes rich list every morning when I get up. If my name is not on it, I will go to work.

32: There are too many liars and obviously not enough fools. I just killed the dragon on the road, swam across the river, climbed to the top of the tower and kissed your princess.

34: Kill you with what, dear. 35: Your mobile phone is cheaper than the phone bill.

It's a long way to Xiu Yuan, so let's take a taxi. 37: Others pretend to be experienced.

38: I am not afraid of stealing tools, but I am afraid of stealing children to understand technology! Failure is not terrible, the key is success or not. 40: Today's college students are so incompetent! Come and copy the porn and cut it out! That's enough, isn't it?

9. When we were young, we often made faces in the mirror. In old age, mirrors are flat.

If an idiot can fly, then my company is an airport. All men are created equal, except those who get married.

I think as long as I have some modest qualities, I will be a perfect person. If you need advice or opinions, we will provide them for free; If you need the correct answer, please pay extra.

In the past, when the alarm clock rang, I often had the problem of patting it before going back to sleep, but since I put three mousetraps next to the alarm clock, my problem has been eradicated. If Beethoven is the "father of symphony", does it mean that Beethoven's father is the "father of symphony"? I have done many stupid things, but I don't care at all. Friends call it "confidence".

The Association for the Blind sincerely advises you: Never drink and drive. Experiment with two bugs.

The one in the whiskey died, which proves that there are no bugs in the stomach when drinking whiskey. If Bill Gates can get one yuan every time he restarts his computer, he will be rich.

Ten years later, the court sentenced the murderer to death for the second time. I pretended to work for my boss, who pretended to pay me.

My wife and I haven't spoken for 18 months, so I haven't had a chance to interrupt her. Have you heard the story "The big pig said yes, but the little pig said no"? I never watch TV. I just often check whether the TV programs in the newspaper are misprinted.

Your eyes are like the bright moon in the sky, the first day; Fifteen points. Why don't you be rational? My uncle is here. Why did you think of going to the zoo to see bears? My eyesight is very poor. For example, see the thumbtacks on the wall over there? You can see it, but I can't.

Every day I keep setting a new world record-the number of days I have lived in this world. In the internet world, your girlfriend may be a man and your boyfriend may be a woman, which is very painful, but you have to accept it.

If you want to compete with tigers who can starve to death more, you win. I put the TV remote control on my waist, making it look like I bought a new mobile phone.

Just having money can't make people happy, so I steal some jewels, stamps, watches and so on. It's really boring Last month, one of my buddies borrowed 4000 yuan from me and said that he was going to have plastic surgery. Now I don't know what he looks like. Are you blind? You can't see such a big shield, but you want to throw stones at my head! Everybody! Today is the 10 anniversary of my wife's 30th birthday! All the columns are well filled except one. The column of "relationship" should be filled with "mother-in-law" instead of "nervous" Dad hit me twice today, the first time because he saw my two-point report card, and the second time because the report card was his childhood.

Tragedy is like I accidentally cut off my little finger; Comedy is like you accidentally fell into the sewer. When arguing, the difference between men and women is like the difference between a rifle and a machine gun.

Next, I will publish Mr. Smith's will. Before publishing the will, I would like to ask sincerely, Mrs. Smith, will you accept my proposal? Don't call your children "rabbits", because from a genetic point of view, it is not good for parents. Honey, I shouldn't shine my shoes with sheets, but I just got back from a business trip and I can't change them for a while. I was wrong.

If a lawyer and a politician fall into the river at the same time, would you rather have coffee or go to the movies? It would be funny if it didn't happen to me. Do you want to have good teeth? Here are three lessons for you: first, rinse your mouth after meals and brush your teeth in the morning and evening; Second, go to the hospital for a dental examination every two years; Third, mind your own business.

Without hair, dandruff is more prominent! We always habitually think that the brain is the most important organ of the human body, but don't forget who made this judgment. Artificial intelligence cannot be compared with the stupidity of nature-because we advocate pure nature. If a person still laughs freely in the face of criticism, he may have found a scapegoat.