How can I make myself more firm?

In daily life, during the retreat, the master who rings the bell should always ring the bell. Before that, he should meditate on a poem: body, language and meaning are one. When the bell rings, the listener wakes up from his dream and becomes conscious, and then he (she) breathes three times, so please ring the bell. When the rest of us hear the bell, we should also stop thinking, take three deep breaths and meditate on the following words: Listen, listen, this melodious bell brings me back to my true self-cultivation meditation to understand what is happening in your body, feeling, consciousness and the world. The most precious practice in Buddhism is meditation. It is important to practice meditation with a good attitude. We must smile more in order to practice meditation. Bells designed to improve mindfulness can help us do this. Suppose we have a son and become an unbearable young man. It may be difficult for us to love him. This is natural. Because people will only be loved if they are cute. If our son becomes unlovable, we will be very unhappy. We hope to love him, so the only way at this time is to understand him and his situation. We have to put aside the empty view or other topics for a while and take our son as a specific topic of meditation. First of all, we should stop the interference of feelings and thoughts, because they will weaken our meditation power; At the same time, we should cultivate concentration. In Sanskrit, we call it Samadhi (Samadhi). When a child wants to do his homework, he must stop chewing gum and listening to the radio so that he can concentrate on his homework. If we want to know our son, we must learn to stop things that distract people from happening. Samadhi is the first step in meditation. Now we have a light bulb. In order to make the light neither scattered nor concentrated, we need a lampshade. It is much easier for us to concentrate on reading. Habit is like getting a lampshade, which can help us focus on something. When we meditate and practice meditation, we don't want the past or the future, but live in the present, so that we can improve our concentration and observe problems deeply with the help of concentration. This is Zen. First of all, we are aware of the problem and focus all our attention on it. Then we observe deeply to understand the essence of this situation, that is, to understand the root of why our son is unhappy. We don't want to blame our son, but we just want to know why he has become like this. Through meditation, we found all the far and near causes that led to his current state of life. The more we observe, the more we know about him, and the more we know about him, the easier it is to have compassion and love for him. Understanding is the root of love and understanding is love itself. Understanding is another name for love, and love is another name for understanding. When we study Buddhism, it is beneficial to practice in this way. If you plant a tree, you won't blame it if it doesn't grow well. You will observe the reason why it doesn't grow well. It may need fertilizer, more water or less sunlight. You will never blame the tree, but you will blame your son. If we know how to take care of him, he will grow like a tree. It's no use blaming. Never blame, never try to convince with reasons and arguments, they will not produce any positive effect. This is my experience. Don't argue, don't complain, don't blame, just try to understand. If you understand, you show that you understand and you can love, the situation will change. Melodious bell is the voice of Buddha calling us back to ourselves. We must respect that voice, stop thinking and talking, and return to ourselves with a smile and breath. This is not the Buddha outside us, but our own Buddha calling us. If we can't hear the bell, we can't hear other sounds from the Buddha, such as wind, birds or even cars or babies. It is the call of the self-nature Buddha to let us return to ourselves. It is beneficial to practice with the help of a clock. Once you can practice with the help of the clock, you can practice with the help of the wind or other sounds. From now on, you can practice not only with sounds, but also with colors. The sunshine through the window is the call from the dharma body, calling for the existence of Buddha and Sinhalese. Quiet, smile, next moment, wonderful moment. You can recite it in meditation and use it in meditation. You can also use other methods, such as calculating interest: suck, one, shout, one; Suck, two, shout, two; Suck, three, shout, three ... until ten o'clock. Then you count backwards: ten, nine, eight, seven ... calculating interest is a way to help you concentrate and get into samadhi. If you don't have enough concentration, you don't have enough strength to achieve a breakthrough in practice, and you can't join the Zen machine. Therefore, breathing, meditation, meditation and other practices are first to help you achieve a certain stability, which is called "stopping". "Stop" is to concentrate. Just as a lampshade can prevent light from spreading and make it easier for you to read, the first step of meditation is to "stop", stop clutter and concentrate on one thing. The most beautiful and valuable thing is your breath. Breathing is wonderful. It connects the body and the mind. Whether you calculate interest or just follow it, it's all for "stopping". "Stop" and "view" are very close. Once you stop, the words on the page will become clearer and our son's problems will become clearer. "Stop" and "view" are meditation and enlightenment. Epiphany means that you have insight, insight into reality. "Stop" is also for "observation", and conversely, "observation" can also help "stop". They are two in one. We have done so many things, run so fast and the situation is so bad that many people will say, "Don't just sit there and do something!" " "But the more you do, the worse the situation may be. So you should say, "Don't always be busy, sit down. "Sit there, stop, be yourself first, and then start from scratch. This is the meaning of meditation. You can try it in the meditation hall, at home or anywhere else, but you must really sit. Just sitting is not enough. You must sit down and say yes. Meditation without "yes" is not meditation. What is this? It is "stop" and "view". There are many ways to "stop" and "observe". Smart teachers can invent various ways to support you. It is said that there are 84,000 kinds of Buddhist practices that can help you get into reality. Buddhism is a method of practice. When we are riding a runaway horse, I think our strongest wish is to stop. How to stop? We must control the speed and keep calm, so we must organize resistance. Spending two hours drinking tea and meditating is an act of resistance, a non-violent act of resistance. We can do this because we have monks. We can do it together and resist this lifestyle that makes us lose ourselves. Zen and meditation are our resistance. So if you want to stop the arms race, you must resist it, starting from your own daily life. I once saw a car in new york with such a slogan on its bumper: "Let peace start with me", which is correct. Let me start with peace ",which is also correct. Zen can be fun. Let's walk slowly, alone or with friends, and choose some places with good scenery if possible. Meditation is really enjoying walking, not to achieve a dazzling goal, but just walking itself. The purpose is to live in the present and enjoy every step you take. Therefore, you must get rid of all anxiety and troubles, don't want the future, don't want the past, just enjoy the present. You can hold the child's hand while meditating. You walk step by step as if you were the happiest person in the world. We have been walking, but we often walk more like running. When we walk in such a hurry, we are printing anxiety and pain on the earth; We must take this road and only print peace and tranquility on the earth. If we long for peace and tranquility, then each of us should choose the latter way to walk. Every child can do this. If we can take one step like that, then we can take two, three, four and five steps. When we can walk peacefully and happily, we are contributing to the peace and happiness of all mankind. Zen is really a very good practice method. Buddha's basic teaching method about meditation is Si Nian Chu. Balinese, Chinese and other languages (including English and French) are acceptable. According to this passage, meditation is to have a clear understanding of your body, your sensory consciousness and what is happening in the external world as the object of consciousness. If you know exactly what happened, you can clearly see when the problem occurred and help prevent further problems. When things broke out, it was too late. How we should treat our daily life is the most important issue. How to treat your feelings, words and daily affairs is meditation. We must learn to integrate meditation into our daily life. There are many simple things to try. For example, before dinner, everyone can sit around the table and practice deep breathing three times. This is to let you find yourself and become your true self. I believe that every deep breath can make you a whole person again. Secondly, before you start eating, you can look at everyone with a smile. Everyone can watch it for two or three seconds, and it won't take long. We never have time to see each other, including the people we love. Once impermanent, it will soon be too late. It is a wonderful thing to appreciate every member of your family without disguise. In Mei Village, a child recites poems before eating every day. Picking up a bowl of rice, he knew he was lucky. As a refugee, he knows that in many countries in Southeast Asia, children do not have enough to eat. The rice they bought in the west is the best rice imported from Thailand. Children know that even in Thailand, Thai children have no chance to eat such rice. They eat inferior rice. Good rice is reserved for the country to export to earn foreign exchange. When a refugee child picks up a bowl of rice, he must remember that he is lucky. He knows that 40000 children his age die of hunger every day. Then the child said something similar to the following: "Today, there are some good things that Mommy just made on the table. Dad is there, my brother is there and my sister is there. It's nice that we all sit together for dinner like this. I know many people are starving. I'm grateful for that. "I suggest that the small room is simple and the light is not too bright. You may want a Jason Chung, a Jason Chung with a beautiful voice, some cushions or chairs, and maybe a bottle of flowers to remind us to return to our nature. Children can smile and concentrate on arranging flowers. If there are five people in your family, you can buy five cushions or five chairs, plus a few for the guests. Maybe you will often invite a guest to practice meditation and breathing with you for three to five minutes. If you want a Buddha statue or a Buddha statue, please be picky. Many times, the Buddha statues I saw were neither relaxed nor peaceful. It can be seen that the artist who made the Buddha statue did not practice breathing and smiling. If you want to invite a Buddha to your home, please pick and choose. For our children, this Buddha statue should be smiling, happy and beautiful. If they don't feel refreshed when they see the Buddha statue, it is not a good Buddha statue. If you can't find a beautiful Buddha statue, please wait a moment and replace it with a flower. Flowers are Buddha, and flowers have Buddha nature. I know some families have rooms to practice breathing. After breakfast, the children go in, sit down, breathe ten times, once, twice, three or ten times, and then go to school. This is a good practice. If your child doesn't want to breathe ten times, what about three times? It is a very good way to start a new day with the self-expectation of becoming a Buddha. If we are a Buddha in the morning and try to nourish this Buddha all day, then at the end of the day, we can go home smiling. This Buddha is still there, and we haven't lost it. When you are angry, don't do anything or talk. Walk slowly into the breathing room as you breathe. The breathing room symbolizes the Buddha land in our hearts. We can go in whenever we need, even if we are not at home. I have a friend. Whenever he is angry, he goes to the rest room at home, breathes three times, rings the bell once, and then begins to recite. So he felt much better at once. If he needs to sit a little longer, he will stay there. When my wife prepares dinner, she often hears the bell coming from the breathing room, which also reminds her to concentrate on her work. At such times, she admires her husband very much. " He's great. He is really different. He knows how to control his anger. "If she was angry just now, her anger will gradually subside. Sometimes she would stop cutting vegetables and go to the breathing room to sit quietly with him. This painting is so lovely that it is far more beautiful than an expensive portrait. Dealing with problems in this way will have a good influence on everyone, not only by example, but also by example. When your child is angry, you don't have to say, "Go to that room!" " "All you have to do is hold his (her) hand, walk into the breathing room together and sit quietly together. This is the best peace education. It is beautiful to start a day with Buddha. Whenever we feel like leaving the Buddha, we sit down and breathe until we return to our true self. I want to suggest three things: arrange a breathing room at home for meditation; Practice breathing and meditation with your child for a few minutes every morning; It only takes ten minutes to practice slow meditation with children before going to bed. These things are important. They can change our civilization.