Woman! What did you have a baby for?

Just watching the circle of friends, an unfamiliar friend complained that he missed Dink very much, but he was forced to have a baby. He never liked it, and he still doesn't like it. He doesn't want to take a look! And there are pictures of newborn babies smiling with their eyes closed. As a mother, I really don't know why this mother sends such a circle of friends, let alone what she means! Who complains about forcing her to have children? Or spit out that you don't like children? As a woman and a mother, I deeply understand her helplessness as a woman, but I really can't understand her rejection of children! I want to ask dear mothers, what are you born with?

Is it voluntary or involuntary? Is it for the continuation of blood? Or is it for the inheritance of love? Or for the advice of parents and relatives? Or is it for someone to support the elderly in the future? Or do nothing but follow the crowd and others will give birth to you? ……

As a middle-aged mother with two treasures, as a professional woman who takes care of both family and work, I think I can understand the sadness and worry of some female friends!

Giving birth to a child not only bears incomparable physical pain, but also bears the pain of breastfeeding, gynecological inflammation and ugly body shape ... not to mention the invasion from internal and external psychological shadows!

Of course, it is the most cruel choice for professional treasure mothers! You have left your job, and you can always be replaced. You lost years of hard work and came back. Things have changed! I have a deep understanding of this! Because of late childbearing, I was nearly forty years old after giving birth to Bauer. I just work, but I am no longer in an important position. I want to change a job that is equivalent to that before I went to Bauer. Looking for more than half a year, there is basically no chance! Age and working hours make me instantly out! Unwilling, but helpless!

I checked some data about the birth of newborns and found that in 20 18, the birth population in China dropped to15.23 million, which was 2 million less than that in 20 17.

In 20 19, the birth population in China dropped to14.65 million, and the population over 65 accounted for 12.6%, the lowest since 1949. According to incomplete statistics, the birth population in China may drop to100000 in 2020! China will enter an aging society in 2022 and a super-aging society in 2033.

Interestingly, there is another statistic about abandoned babies in China: in the 1980s, there were 5,000 abandoned babies in China every year, and in the 1990s, there were 50,000 abandoned babies every year, rising to 65,438+10,000 at the beginning of this century. According to incomplete statistics, there will be 253,000 abandoned babies in China by the end of 2020!

One is the linear decrease of newborn data, and the other is the doubling of abandoned child data! What does this strong contrast mean?

The double pressure of family and society makes having children an extremely difficult life choice for women! The subsequent raising of children exhausted many women. If the family changes again and the career is interrupted, it will be even more rainy!

Since the early 1980s, the state has advocated late marriage and late childbearing, and the slogan of "If you want to be rich, have fewer children and plant more trees" has basically spread all over the streets. At that time, how many "super guerrillas" our parents staged to have more children! Now many places are planning to liberalize the three-child policy, but it is still impossible for women to have more children willingly!

If we still have some traditional thinking and worries after 80s, then the post-90s and post-00s are rarely bound by tradition! With the social environment becoming more and more relaxed and inclusive, women's consciousness has never been awakened before! Dink, unmarried, same-sex and other new life forms are gradually accepted by society. It is no longer an inevitable choice for women to have children. Then, why do more and more independent women give up their figure, appearance and career to have children? Even if forced to have children, as I mentioned at the beginning of this article, friends "still don't like it"! Will a child who is not loved by his mother grow up healthily?

We gave the child life, which is not his choice, but he is an independent individual. They will grow up and have their own ideas and lives! And we, as people who brought them into this world, should shoulder the responsibility of guiding them!

As the saying goes, "it is the sin of parents to be born without raising; Raising without teaching is the curse of parents; If the teaching is not good, the parents are also wrong. " No matter what you have children for, children are born for you. We participated in the growth of a life and became the most meaningful thing in our life!