Joke Collection Website - News headlines - I don’t know how to play music, chess, calligraphy and painting, but I’m tired of doing laundry and cooking.

I don’t know how to play music, chess, calligraphy and painting, but I’m tired of doing laundry and cooking.

1. Everyone wants to catch the tail of youth, but unfortunately youth is just a gecko

2. When you are a child, smiling is a mood, but when you grow up, smiling is an expression.

3. Only when you hold your hand, you will know that your son is ugly, and your face will burst into tears. If you don’t leave, I will leave.

4. A person’s life is like taking a shit, sometimes you have worked very hard But what came out was just a fart.

5. You are so good at pretending, how can I bear to expose you? How can I not bear to love you?

6. Don’t cry in front of my grave, it will ruin my path to reincarnation.

7. I cried and refused to leave, but now I use my smile to let go.

8. On a whim that day, I used your photo as my computer desktop. Holy shit, I actually got a computer virus!

9. Men, if you love your girl, you should believe her.

10. Although the bird is small, it really covers the entire sky.

11. If you want to be prominent in front of others, you will have to suffer behind others.

12. Grandpas come from grandsons.

13. Some people look much better when wearing facial masks than in real life.

14. I wish I could grow old together with you accidentally.

15. I will still believe in love, but I will no longer believe that love can last forever.

16. If I live in your world for one more day, I won’t even be able to see my own shadow.

17. I loved you deeply, so I never regret that you have left me far away.

18. If beauty is a letter of recommendation, then kindness is a credit card!

19. The tongue lasts longer than teeth, and software lasts longer than hardware.

20. Protect yourself, love others, and please don’t come out in the middle of the night to scare people.

21. You name it, if you don’t have a diploma, you will imitate others’ ugly parents; if you are not smart, you will imitate others’ bald head!

22. If you were a flower, even cows would not dare to shirk you.

23. If you can't tolerate me, it means either your mind is too narrow-minded or my personality is too great.

24. I don’t know how to play chess, calligraphy and painting, but I feel tired from doing laundry and cooking.

25. If someone doesn’t offend me, I won’t offend anyone; if someone offends me, I’ll be polite; if someone offends me again, I’ll give him a shot; if someone offends me again, I’ll root it out

26. If eating more fish can nourish the brain and make people smarter, then I have to eat at least a pair of whales.

27. I originally planned to search the dog, but I saw the cat pounce.

28. If you cannot put on a wedding dress for the woman you love, please stop unbuttoning her clothes. Nice autograph words that put you in a relaxed and happy mood. I can’t play music, chess, calligraphy and painting, but I’m tired of doing laundry and cooking.

1. After leaving, I want you not to forget one thing: don’t forget to miss me. When you miss me, don't forget that I miss you too.

2. Time is too thin and the gaps between fingers are too wide.

3. When I woke up, it was dark.

4. People are not smart, so they imitate others’ baldness.

5. I am like a gust of wind, traveling selflessly in this noisy city. They can’t see me, and I can’t see myself. Just like this, I feel the feeling of flying, forgetting my worries and losing everything. When I feel restless, my heart becomes lighter.

6. I was so nervous that my heart beat faster, as if there was a little ball jumping around in my heart.

7. Little girls all want to find a white horse in their dreams. When they open their eyes, they find that the world is full of gray donkeys. After being heartbroken, they can only choose one of the donkeys. Strong and strong, such a donkey is named: Economical Male.

8. The sky is too blue! The sea is too salty! Life is too difficult! The work is too annoying! I am destined to be with you! I miss you and have insomnia! Seeing you is too far!

9. Hatred can never resolve hatred, only compassion can resolve hatred. This is the eternal truth.

10. When you receive this text message, you also receive the forget-me-not grass and clover I gave you. The forget-me-not grass can make you forget your worries, and the clover can bring you luck. with happiness.

Smile knowingly, okay?

11. The fool stole the beggar's wallet, and the blind man saw it. The mute roared, which frightened the deaf man. The hunchback stood up and the lame man flew up. After kicking him, the wanted criminal wanted to take him to the police station, but Mazi said, let it go for my sake.

12. Work hard!! For your Audi and my Dior.

13. Instead of regretting the past, it is better to seize the present and strive for the future!

14. I like you so much, and you will die if you like me.

15. Youth is full of energy, bravery overwhelms cowardice, and progress overwhelms complacency. Such vigor is common among men in their twenties, but more common among men in their sixties. Adding years does not mean getting old, and abandoning ideals means falling into old age.

16. Happiness is a mood, a natural and positive attitude. Seek happiness in the ordinary, seek happiness in the hardships, and demand happiness in the twists and turns.

17. If you don’t have medical insurance or life insurance, don’t act bravely after dark.

18. An unintentional word may ignite a dispute, a cruel word may destroy a life, a timely word may relieve tension, and an intimate word may heal wounds and save others.

19. Even though you are wearing cologne, I can still smell a faint smell of scum.

20. It is said that people have only two choices, busy dying or busy living. I think I have a third choice: busy waiting to die.

21. I thought I was decadent, but today I found out that I was already scrapped.

22. When I was a child, I thought I could save the whole world when I grew up, but when I grew up, I realized that the whole world could not save me.

23. As a god, I shine in this beautiful moment, no mortals can disturb me.

24. There is that person who makes your palms sweat, your heart beats faster, and you feel that your life is complete. You and him together are the whole world.

25. As happy as a dream!

26. Find some time to relax and don’t take on too much pressure. Reject responsibilities that are not our own and let ourselves do what we want to do. Not too long. An afternoon is enough.

27. People who say money is a sin, everyone is trying to make money; people who say beauty is a disaster, everyone wants it; people who say it is cold at high places, everyone is climbing; people who say that smoking and drinking are harmful to the body, but they don’t quit; people who say that heaven is the best Good things, don’t go!

28. The sign of an immature man is that he can make heroic sacrifices for his ideals, while the sign of a mature man is that he can live a humble life for his ideals.

29. Happiness is not the end. Happiness is the road that you have worked hard to travel. The love and touch encountered on the road, the ups and downs, setbacks and pain on the road together constitute this road. It is also because of them that we understand the true meaning of happiness.

30. I don’t know how to play chess, calligraphy and painting, but I find it tiring to do laundry and cooking.

31. After studying for more than ten years, I think it is easier to get along in kindergarten!

32. Drink a bowl of soothing soup, apply night cream on your face happily, and be confident that your quilt will always be strong Warm, heart-warming hugs are always lingering, children's words are blown to your ears, and your intimate lover is always by your side. I wish you a peaceful sleep and a bright smile.

33. Choose a leisurely and poetic path, let the wings of your soul fly, savor the beauty of life, and enjoy the beautiful life.

34. Journey to the West tells us: All monsters with a backing were picked up, and all monsters without a backing were beaten to death with a stick.

35. People all have times when they cannot get what they want, they all have the embarrassment of failed wishes, and they all have the embarrassment of being unwilling to face failure. I once had lofty ideals and longed for perfection.

36. The opportunity to learn and grow is not in the future, but in every living moment.

37. Owning a car and a house is the foundation of stability and an opportunity for Tengda to seize and continue to accelerate forward.

38. Be a positive, brave and optimistic dream chaser, never say negative words, only persevere and strive towards the goal. After success, you will be waiting for your arrival not far away.

39. There is only one way to distinguish levels in society, and that is competition. You must work hard, otherwise you will end up being pressed at the bottom of society.

40. Grandma smiles happily like a flower!

41. Please don’t regard my tolerance of you as your shameless capital.

42. Life is like Song Zude’s mouth, you never know who will be unlucky next.

43. We have to separate, say goodbye softly, with gratitude in my heart, thank you for giving me a deep friendship.

44. No one loves anyone with his hands in his pockets.

45. Relax yourself appropriately, don’t let yourself be too depressed, and don’t let unhappiness interfere with our present; everyone will have entanglements in life, either find someone to talk to, or find a place to vent, Don't punish yourself for other people's mistakes, but find a balance in life; learn to let go of the unsatisfactory things in life and learn to enjoy the good things in life.

46. We do live a difficult life. We have to withstand all kinds of external pressures, and we also have to face our own inner confusions. When you are struggling, if someone looks at you with understanding, you will feel the warmth of life. Perhaps just a brief glance is enough to make me excited.

47. Youth in my heart is bitter and sweet, delicate and rough, clear and hazy, a cup of bitter tea, but in the end it tastes elegant. .

48. Time is our current breathing, and every moment should be lived wholeheartedly.

49. When he heard everyone's praise, two clouds appeared on his cheeks, and a bright red tongue circled his mouth, feeling very happy.

50. I will know you are a monster as soon as I open my eyes.

51. What a love that is not accepted requires is not sadness, but time, a period of time that can be used to forget. A deeply wounded heart needs not sympathy, but understanding. Because we have loved, we are compassionate; because we understand, we are tolerant.

52. I firmly believe that there will be a man who came to this world to be tortured by me.

53. I am not RMB, how can I make everyone like me?!

54. I was also an infatuated person, but it rained and I drowned.

55. My advantage is: I am very handsome; but my disadvantage is: I am not obviously handsome.

56. We can never go back. We can no longer have another childhood; no more junior high school; no more first love; no more joy, happiness, sadness and pain. Yesterday, one second ago, it was impossible to go back. Life turns out to be an out-of-print movie that cannot be played back!

57. After spending the night and being hurt, we walked through the lonely years together with the company of words. I really hope that I can hold hands with you and walk toward our future. The summer solstice has not yet come, feel the beautiful and gorgeous pain and outline the most incomplete love.

58. There is a kind of mood, called joy, anger, sorrow and joy; there is a kind of taste, called sour, sweet, bitter, spicy and salty; there is a kind of wisdom, called foresight; there is a kind of fate, called eternal life; there is a group, called fireworks in the world, life. There are various states of mind; there is a state of mind called letting nature take its course.

59. Learn Feng Shui when you have time. Having a good tomb after your death can make up for the regret of not being able to afford a good house during your lifetime.

60. In this world, there is always someone waiting for you somewhere. If it's not here, it's not this time, it will be there, it's that time, waiting for you.

61. Only when you hold your hand, you will know that your son is ugly, and your face will burst into tears. If you don’t leave, I will leave.

62. One today is worth two tomorrows. It's easy to tear up a calendar, but it's not easy to grasp a day. Believing in others and giving up on yourself is the beginning of many people’s failed lives! In the most difficult moments, you must believe that you have the best shotgun in your hands.

63. At a certain time, I miss the palm prints of a period of time; hiding in a certain place, I miss someone who makes me care.

64. It doesn’t matter where the destination is, what matters is to feel the process and relax!

65. I allow you to enter my world, but you are not allowed to be in my world. Walking around in the world.

66. True love is not a temporary good feeling, but the urge to persist despite knowing that there is no result.

67. One of the saddest things in life is that you meet someone who means a lot to you, only to find out that you are not meant for each other, so you have to let them go.

68. Learn Feng Shui when you have time, and occupying a good tomb after death can make up for the regret of not being able to afford a good house during your lifetime. Use the spirit of hip-hop and blues to live a life like the erhu.

69. Many people pursue perfection too much. Some people desire perfection and do not allow themselves to make any mistakes. As a result, I still dare not make a decision. There may also be some people who are too dependent and are used to following the pace of others. It is difficult for them to make decisions when they encounter things.

70. Time is merciless but love is there, and I will never stop missing you. Even though we can't meet each other, I will still miss you. Send a message to chat with you and build this bridge of lovesickness. I don’t have a chance to see you again, so I have to say I miss you! A hilarious classic story about water that can carry a boat and cook porridge - I can’t play music, chess, calligraphy and painting, but I’m tired of doing laundry and cooking

Destroying friendship There are many ways, the most radical one is to borrow money.

Love is like white rice, and the romantic process is like vegetables. When people are hungry, they think about eating. But after eating, more people like to comment on whether the food is delicious or not, while ignoring the white rice.

Falling is not terrible. What is terrible is that when a person falls, he is very sober.

Even if the bowl is made of iron, what will you eat if there is no food in it?

When my teacher told me the definition of "handsome guy" when I was a child, I couldn't understand it. Later, my classmate brought me a mirror, and suddenly I understood.

It takes thousands of years to change from a monkey to a human, and it only takes a bottle of wine to change from a human to a monkey.

Love is like two people pulling on a rubber band. The one who gets hurt is always the one who is unwilling to let go.

Wear other people's shoes, walk your own path, and let them find it.

I vowed to myself that from tomorrow on, I must work hard! However, I live in today every day.

If you accidentally step on a tulip, it leaves its fragrance on your feet. This is called tolerance.

Everyone has a time when their eyes light up, just as everyone has a time when their eyes darken.

It is women's love for shopping malls that makes shopping malls more and more exciting.

Whenever night comes, I am particularly envious of snails. No matter how inefficient their work is, they still have their own house after all.

There are two great tragedies in life, one is not getting what you want, and the other is getting something you don’t want.

Driving is easy, except for the newcomers!

Only women and heroes have trouble, and wives and jobs are hard to find.

There are three things that hurt people: worries, quarrels, and empty wallets. The most hurtful of all is an empty wallet.

I am an actor - my eyes widen when I see a beautiful girl.

Don’t speak English in front of me in the future, okay?

When the sky falls, you hold it up, and I hold you up...

The can ring loves the can, but the can has Coke in its heart

I am like a can A fly lying on the glass, the future is bright, but I can't find a way out.

Being crowded in Beijing brings trouble to the capital...

Who can be as loyal to my feelings as to RMB

She is hers, Death is her mascot.

You are really a real beauty - you are only beautiful in the tunnel, because there are no lights in the tunnel.

Love is like pi, infinite and endless...

I can't play chess, calligraphy and painting, but I feel tired from doing laundry and cooking.

One mountain cannot accommodate two tigers, unless there is one male and one female.

Water can carry a boat and cook porridge.

I drank to drown the pain, but this damn pain learned to swim. Slogans for calligraphy and painting

1. Close communication, calligraphy and painting convey true feelings.

2. Promote the art of calligraphy and painting and promote traditional Chinese culture.

3. Happy creativity and fun.

4. The pen conveys the grandeur of the universe, and the ink dyes the four seasons of spring in China.

5. The exchange of calligraphy and painting brings the two sides closer together.

6. Great achievements open up a new world, and Fang Qiu writes a new chapter.

7. The powerful and dynamic writing touches both sides of the Taiwan Strait, and the poem and painting inherit China.

8. Caring about the Calligraphy Association and revitalizing Donghua.

9. Learn books to cultivate virtue, and work hard to rejuvenate the country.

10. Use artistic exchanges as an opportunity to promote the development and prosperity of cross-strait culture.

11. Practice pen calligraphy and inherit Chinese character culture.

12. Explain the spiritual inheritance and cultural essence of calligraphy.

13. Let the dream of art set sail from here.

14. Calligraphy and painting competition, wonderful writing.

15. Hold a small pen in your hand, don’t be proud when you write it and become famous.

16. Practice hard-tipped calligraphy uprightly and behave like a Chinese citizen.

17. Be an upright person and write uprightly.

18. Not only the writing skills, but also the true feelings between the two sides of the Taiwan Strait are conveyed.

19. Write beautiful calligraphy, be an excellent person, and be like the person you write.

20. Based on the Beibu Gulf, create a cultural industry event on the west coast of the Taiwan Strait.

21. Tranquility leads to the ambition of a distant man, and indifference makes the ambition brighter than the sun and the moon.

22. The blue and white ink characters are beautiful, but not as deep as the love between the two sides.

23. Calligraphy and painting connect both sides of the Taiwan Strait, creating a harmonious new China.

24. Flashy and practical, dazzling; unknown, the deepest dedication.

25. There is beauty like jade in the painting, and there is a house of gold in the picture.

26. A good calligraphy will accompany you for a lifetime.

27. It is the fragrance of ink that can reach far!

28. Enjoy the exchange of calligraphy and painting and convey the true feelings between the two sides.

29. The small characters are square and the steel is straight and hard.

30. Practicality is the last word, and beauty is the real wealth.

31. The words are like the person, and the calligraphy is fascinating.

32. Use ink to describe the colorful life, and write down the wonderful moments.

33. Practice Chinese calligraphy and inherit traditional culture.

34. Draw a wonderful future and draw dreams in life.

35. The cradle of painters and the palace of art.

36. There is a road to the mountain of books, and diligence is the path; there is no limit to the sea of ??learning, and hard work is the boat.

37. Wenzong of Qin and Han Dynasty, Kaifa of Jin and Tang Dynasties.

38. Write beautiful Chinese characters and be a civilized Chinese.

39. The hard pen is carefully carved to produce exquisite works, and the calligraphy is refined into gold through repeated hammering.

40. Carry forward national culture and art and promote quality education for students.

41. A good handwriting will benefit you throughout your life.

42. Practice good calligraphy and pass on civilization to a generation.

43. The tip of the pen conveys emotion and the ink is fragrant.

44. Calligraphy has a path of hard work, and a boundless sea of ??ink is a boat of hard work.

45. Write about temperament and life, and promote the essence of the motherland.

46. The greenery of Qingdao is the oil painting of the world.

47. Innovation in concept and equality in personality.

48. Enter the world of calligraphy and painting and enjoy the aura of all things.

49. Xizhi’s pen depicts the eternal charm and thousands of emotions on the ground in Orchid Pavilion.

50. Inherit traditional culture and promote the charm of national quintessence.

51. Indulge in the sea of ??ink and paint a life.

52. Inherit Chinese civilization and appreciate the charm of writing.

53. The pursuit of dreams is beyond your imagination.

54. Write well and add color to your life.

55. Colorful and interlocking; stronger and more passionate.

56. Paintings paint the vast sea, and art connects China.

57. Nothing is difficult in the world, as long as you are willing to climb.

58. Use books to cultivate sentiments, and use pens to understand life.

59. Interpret the spirit of calligraphy and inherit the essence of culture.

60. Calligraphy and painting reveal the true meaning, and pen and ink reveal the spirit.