There is a kind of wisdom called "keep your mouth shut"

The Dutch philosopher Baruch Spinoza once said: "The thing that human beings are least able to control is their tongues, and the thing they are least able to do is control their desires."

Fully agree.

Being eloquent is of course a good thing, but those self-righteous speeches that are irrespective of the occasion, regardless of human feelings, not only create embarrassment, but are also annoying.

A truly wise person knows how to remain silent and tight-lipped at the right time.

Don’t ask questions about things that have happened before.

An ancient saying goes: “Never forget the past, and you will be the master of the future.”

In life, for things that have happened, remember the past. People like to review and reflect in order to benefit from it. However, "summary" often evolves into "questioning":

"What do you think?"

"Why don't you listen to me?"

"Why are you so stupid?"

This is a sign of insufficient intelligence.

A truly smart person will understand that if something happens, it just happens. No matter how much questioning you do, it will not help, and it will be harmful and useless.

I once saw a piece of news.

A mother forgot to turn off the hair dryer because she was busy taking care of her children. Because I had been away for too long, the hair dryer exploded and ignited the sheets and pillows.

In an instant, the billowing smoke raged, and the house was burned to ashes. Only the skeleton of the bed was left, and the walls were cracked with deep marks.

Seeing the newly renovated house burned to the ground, the mother blamed herself very much.

But her husband downplayed it: "It's okay. As long as everything is okay, the worst thing is that we can renovate it and we can live in a new house."

In the news comment area, netizens lamented one after another , this man is so warm. Indeed.

He did not blame his wife: "Don't you know the priorities when doing things?"

He did not ridicule his wife: "Don't you know the basic knowledge about electricity?"

He did not complain about his wife: "How much money will be wasted if it is burned like this?"

Because he saw his wife's sadness and self-blame, because he knew that home was not a reasonable place, and because he understood that it would be fine if the house was gone. Renovation, once the love is gone, there is no turning back.

So he said nothing except comfort. This kind of commitment and mind is touching.

Indeed, the fire has already occurred, the damage has been caused, and the "perpetrator" has realized his mistake. If the root cause is investigated, the situation will not be reversed.

It’s better to be silent, swallow those words, and choose to understand and comfort.

No one is perfect and nothing is perfect.

When others make mistakes, as long as it does not involve principles, we might as well "keep it tight-lipped" and block all accusations, criticisms and complaints, and only give consideration and warmth.

Only this attitude of spring breeze and rain can prevent bad things from getting worse.

Know people, don’t judge them

A founder once shared a personal experience in an interview.

He said that when he was young, he thought that those who knelt down and worshiped when they saw Buddha statues and were fascinated by Feng Shui were typical superstitious thoughts. He always treated them with disdain and found it difficult to make friends with them.

But this idea and approach slowly changed after he started his own business.

Because he saw that starting a business is difficult, the risks are high, and the responsibilities are heavy. Under huge pressure, people will unconsciously look for ways to relieve stress, and believing in superstition is just one of the ways to relieve stress. kind.

He concluded that it does not matter whether you believe it or not. What is important is that you must control yourself and not point fingers or make unreasonable comments about others.

Indeed, any lifestyle in the world is the choice of the person concerned. As long as it does not hurt others or violate the law, it should be respected.

Those who are accustomed to commenting on others often "kill people" invisibly.

I once watched a Korean drama and was very touched by one of the plots.

My daughter is sick and needs a liver transplant, and her mother is willing to donate her liver. For safety reasons, the doctor suggested that the mother lose weight first before having surgery.

After a series of exercises, my mother was overwhelmed and died of a heart attack.

At this time, the chatty women in the gym started talking one after another, saying that she died in order to win back her husband's heart because of her love for beauty.

This mother originally wanted to save her daughter, but she was called a resentful woman, which was very embarrassing.

Wang Xiaobo once said: "Footballing at the mouth and making value judgments on others are very low-level."

I deeply agree.

Smart people are very cautious when expressing their opinions. They don't take what they see and say whatever comes to mind. We will not impose malicious speculation or groundless accusations on others.

They understand that people have thousands of faces, and it is impossible to judge a person's quality by just one sentence, two things, or three relationships, let alone give a fair and objective score.

Since you don’t know the whole picture and the truth, then keep your mouth shut, maintain basic courtesy and respect, and don’t comment, discuss, or ignore.

See through, don’t tell.

There are about two types of people in life. One is to tell the world about what they know, and they can’t wait for everyone to listen to them. Worship him. The other is to know everything well, but always keep it secret, without exaggerating, showing off, or showing off.

There is no doubt that both types of people are smart people. The difference is that the latter is more intelligent, just like Qi Baishi.

I read a short story online, which was very interesting.

Zhang Daqian presented his painting "Green Willow Singing Cicada" to collector Xu Nailin. It happened that Qi Baishi was also a guest at Xu's house at that time.

Qi Baishi looked at the big cicada lying on the top of a willow branch with its head down in the painting. After looking at it carefully for a while, he admired the painting.

Then he changed the subject and said very euphemistically: "I have painted cicadas before, and I asked an old farmer for advice. According to him, cicadas always have their heads pointing upward, and rarely do they." There is a downward trend."

He paused and added: "Of course, I haven't verified it, and what the old farmer said may not be correct."

Zhang Daqian said this. It got to my heart, and I had been looking for an opportunity to find out. Finally, one midsummer day when he was out sketching, he saw it clearly. As Qi Baishi said, most of the cicada's heads were pointing upward.

Zhang Daqian quickly informed Qi Baishi of his observation results. Unexpectedly, Qi Baishi listened carefully but smiled without saying a word.

At this time, Zhang Daqian realized that Qi Baishi had understood the mistakes in the painting from the beginning, but in order to take into account the feelings of himself and his friends, he made up an old farmer to correct the mistakes tactfully.

The writer Maugham once said: "What you have to overcome is your vanity, your desire to show off, and your cleverness that always wants to rush out and be in the limelight."

Qi Baishi is the kind of person who is not vain, does not show off, and does not want to be in the limelight.

Things in the world come and go, nothing more than those few things. Those who can see through things are smart; but those who see through things without telling them are wise. This requires a compassionate heart, a calmness that is rare for confusion, and a sincerity that knows the world but does not know the world.

Ji Xianlin said: "Don't tell any lies, tell not all the truth."

If you see through something but don't tell it, your character is trustworthy.

Zhou Guoping said: "Compared with people who talk incessantly and eloquently, sometimes I prefer to stay with people who don't like to talk."

Being appropriately tight-lipped is a great way to keep your mouth shut. Wisdom:

Not asking after things have happened is trust and love;

Knowing people without judging others is respect and tolerance;

Seeing through but not telling them is showing consideration. and thorough.

Language can be armor to help us fight bravely; it can also be a dagger to tear us into the thorns. How to use it and when to use it is all up to us.

I hope we all truly understand the truth that "eloquence is silver, silence is gold".