I can't bear to hurt others. Why do people come to hurt me?

The villain is often an obstacle to our career and a stumbling block to success. In real life, we all meet all kinds of little people, which really brings a lot of trouble to our lives. Invisibly caused us pressure and played a certain destructive role. Many people have suffered in this respect. In serious cases, it is very common that the career stops, the family breaks up, the reputation is ruined, and life is ruined here.

It can be seen that villains are common in our lives, which is not good for us. We must prevent such incidents from happening. This is what the ancients often said: "It is indispensable to harm people and to prevent people."

What are the effective ways to deal with villains?

First, avoidance or avoidance. For despicable snobs, because they often adopt the method of "the former set, the latter set", on the one hand, they try their best to suppress their competitors and create many difficulties for their own survival, on the other hand, they will try their best to kiss up to the leaders. So such people will generally be trusted and reused by leaders, some of whom are your direct leaders, some of whom are your partners and some of whom are your colleagues. What can we do? Since you can't be isolated from them in your work and life, the only thing you can do in the face of these people is to try not to or reduce contact with them, avoid or reduce contact with them in your work or life, and try not to reveal your privacy to him.

Second, you must not include it in your friends list. When you join a group (such as a school or work unit), you must divide your friends into "three, six, nine, etc." When choosing friends, we should adopt different communication methods according to different levels of friends. As for this scumbag, you should never put it on the list of core friends or bosom friends. It's best not to even include friends in the list, as long as there is superficial etiquette, to prevent yourself from getting hurt when you really pay, and to avoid being fatally countered by such people.

Third, avoid discussing important core issues with them. Everyone will have their own privacy, or need friends' opinions and suggestions on relatively important issues. If they are leaders, they need to listen to opinions in advance in major decisions of official or commercial affairs. At this time, we should try to avoid such people who are "weaker than the weak". They won't keep a secret for you. They will show off everywhere to show that they can master more core secrets than others, and be complacent about their special relationship or status with leaders.

If you don't want to screw things up, please keep your mouth shut to such people at any time and never discuss important or core issues with them.

Fourth, resolutely abandon such people when the team is formed. As the saying goes, "a mouse excrement spoils a pot of porridge." If a team wants to have combat effectiveness, first of all, everyone in this team should have team spirit, cooperation spirit and dedication spirit. Despicable people first consider not the combat effectiveness of the team, but the cohesion of the team. They often think more about how much benefit they can get from this team. What they think most is how to calculate their colleagues and make themselves rich and famous. Sometimes, they will sacrifice the interests of the team and the collective for their own petty profits, which is the terrible thing about such people. Therefore, such people will inevitably become "rat shit" in a team.

Fifth, choose the right time to remind leaders to beware of despicable people. For the despicable person who is reused by the leader, remember never to directly say your meanness in front of the leader. Doing so often backfires. Most leaders will think that you are questioning the standards of employing leaders, the nepotism of leaders and their working ability. This is a "dead hole" that leaders are quite taboo. Some leaders will also think that you are jealous, so as to question whether there is something wrong with your character and personality, and ultimately affect your impression in the minds of leaders.

The best way is to choose the right opportunity to help the leader analyze the reasons why something is not done well. You can vaguely tell the leader how he does things in the unit, such as why he can't get help from his colleagues, which will subtly affect the trust of the leader.

Six, do enough firewall to prevent despicable damage. For such a despicable snob, we should have a steelyard in our hearts. To treat such people, we must have the heart of harming others and preventing others. For this kind of person, you must remember the wise words handed down from your ancestors, that is, "just say three words, don't throw away all my heart", otherwise you will die miserably, and you still don't know how you died.

The best way to deal with this kind of person is to just listen and not talk, always update the firewall in your heart, always remind yourself not to expose your true thoughts easily, especially your views on leaders or friends, and never let this scumbag know and gossip.

7. Deal with a man as he deals with you. Scumbags are good at using "despicable means", such as spreading rumors, gossiping, sowing dissension and so on. They usually appear as your best friends or children and "stab you" when you are unprepared. For example, when democratic evaluation, professional title evaluation, advanced evaluation and promotion evaluation involve your core interests, they know that you meet the set conditions, but such people will say that they will definitely vote for you face to face, but they are actually playing the devil's advocate behind your back.

To deal with this kind of person, you can also take the method of "dealing with a man as he deals with you" and let him taste the pain of being assassinated.

8. Face-to-face confrontation has messed up its living environment. Another way is that when you hear a scumbag spreading rumors or nonsense, you can confront him face to face within the scope of spreading rumors, that is, make him embarrassed, let people in the circle know that he likes to gossip, and let people know that they should always be vigilant when dealing with him, so that such people have no room to live at will.

Generally speaking, this kind of person is afraid that I will confront him face to face, because he also knows that what he said is not true and can't stand scrutiny. As long as you master this person's weakness and compete with him several times, this despicable person will learn from you and will not dare to provoke you easily in the future.

Of course, to deal with such despicable people and social "scum", try not to have direct conflicts, so as not to hurt yourself by accident. After all, such people can do anything but lose face.