Joke Collection Website - Mood Talk - Crosstalk escape line
Crosstalk escape line
Squeeze forward and hiss: "The tiger is out of the mountain!" . Yo-yo, you pushed me out.
Oh, did you break it?
A: I am not afraid of breaking anywhere. I broke my arm and leg. I can't help picking up Baba from the hospital. Breaking this place won't work, no.
It's a place where people stay!
Oh, it fell into the tiger hole!
A: I looked up and saw a big tiger lying not far ahead, which scared me to lose my voice. Oh, my God!
Why do you call mother tiger?
Call mom? It's no use calling grandma, it's over! The weight of the big guy 120 kilograms, even the bones and meat are just a lunch for the tiger.
Where is it?
B: Don't worry. Take your time.
A: My head is big. It's nice to sneak a look at the tiger.
B: The tiger didn't see you?
A: I am communicating with you!
B: Huh? Staring at you!
A: As soon as the tiger glared at me, my head was full of energy and many heroic images emerged.
What a hero!
A: I looked up and there were many people looking at me from above. We are young people of the times. So many people fall on the tiger's mouth that we can't give it to the green one.
Young people have no face. In the past, did you hear the Beijing opera Song Wu Da Hu?
B: Of course.
Well, that's not true. My buddy can really practice today, which can really open your eyes.
B: Want to shoot a tiger?
A: Hey!
You're really great.
A: What?
That's a good idea.
A: That's a good idea. You must stand up. That's what I was thinking.
What are you thinking about?
A: We are all educated in law. Do you know there is an animal protection law?
I know.
The man who killed the tiger was sentenced to two years in prison.
B: You have a strong sense of law.
Who do you think made this law? It is illegal to shoot tigers with me. The tiger ate me for nothing.
That family protects wild animals.
A: Why do you protect women and children and wildlife?
That should also be protected.
A: I'm thinking about it. It's a mess up there
Oh?
Hello! Help! Someone fell into the tiger hole!
B: Oh!
A: someone cheered me up. Hey, man, hang in there! When I hear something, hold on. What is this place? Can I wait? you
Ll: It's easy to talk standing up. I'll watch you when you come down.
Aren't people worried about you?
A: It can't be that messy. An old man shouted to me.
B: Ah.
A: Son! You must have a guy to kill a tiger and throw my cane to you.
A cane!
A: A sister-in-law told me, Brother, do you want a knife? Sister-in-law has a fruit knife
B: Look at these two weapons.
A: The idea is to throw a brick into it and let me climb up.
B: Oh.
Well, someone suggested that I throw a cigarette so that I can take a sip to refresh myself first. There is a kind-hearted old woman.
B: Oh.
A: My heart is good and my tears are coming out.
B: Yes.
A: climb to the edge and shout at me. The child will give you a pen. Write something first.
This old lady is really interesting.
A: No one came out to organize, even if a temporary rescue team was set up first.
B: That's too late.
A: Does throwing fruit knives and crutches work?
B: These two weapons almost killed the tiger.
This tiger is lazy. What should I do? I want to stab the tiger with a stick.
B: No, don't bargain. You must poke the tiger.
A: Besides, what's the look in that old man's eyes? Look, the crutch is throwing it behind the tiger's ass. I will catch the tiger's tail as soon as possible.
Bashang ...
Oh, you can't move.
A: think about it and don't move.
B: Ah.
A: That's what the old lady said.
B: Huh?
A: Let me leave a message while I'm awake.
Do you really want to write?
A: I am old, too.
B: Young people of the times!
A: My fortune-teller said I was 28 years old, which means I'm in big trouble this year.
B: Yo!
A: After my birthday a few days ago, I was still very beautiful!
B: It's hard to get rid of.
A: Today is a mystery. They probably calculated it for me according to the lunar calendar.
B: Ha ha!
A: You can hide in the second day, but you can't hide in the fifteenth.
Hmm.
A: If I leave a few words, I will blame my mother.
What's bothering your mother?
A: Just say me.
B: What's the matter?
The people next to me think I'm quite tall. Take a tape measure and measure at 1.65 meters.
B: One meter and sixty-five will do.
A: You said yes. None of the girls I date can do it.
B: What's the matter?
I'm too young to date.
Ouch.
Do you think if I have an appointment, I can come here to watch the Tigers game on Sunday?
B: Then why can't you come?
Why not? Tell me, young man, when you are dating, who doesn't go to the mother-in-law's house on Sunday?
Live.
B: Is that right?
A: Is that right? ! I tell you, our second child hasn't hired a nanny since he started dating someone!
B: So you want to be a nanny?
A: Being a nanny is not life-threatening.
That's true.
A: I can't meet a big tiger! Can you still fall in love after work? Is there anyone who visits the zoo in love? What is the park like?
What are you talking about there? Smell the zoo. It stinks. That's your smell. What are you talking about?
B: You fell into the den because there was no object?
A: It doesn't matter if you don't have an object. You have grown taller, and I have grown taller. I can see everything. What should I push forward?
Huh? That's good. I can see clearly, even a few beards of the tiger.
B: What a rare opportunity you have.
A: I'll buy you one.
I dare not.
A: If you leave a few words, you will blame my mother. We don't want to recruit old people. I won't talk about it.
B: Please leave a message for the company.
What do you mean?
Hmm.
A: Leader, teacher, I came out to play on Sunday and was accidentally eaten by a tiger.
Actually.
A: It's all my fault. No organizational discipline, sloppy. I didn't estimate the consequences of the tiger eating me.
B: it's impossible to estimate.
A: I am dead. What am I checking? Forget it, just die. Anyway, I have never died once since I was a child.
B: Ha.
A: Talk to the leader this time.
B: Oh.
A: We told him to give him as much pension as you want. We won't lie to you. Work-related injuries are actually not taken for granted.
Death.
I think that's all.
A: Why can't such a big boy play well? If he must be eaten by a tiger, he probably can't approve anything.
I can't approve you!
I'm just tinkering here, and everyone up there is giving me advice.
B: Yes.
A: This one says, hey, young man, the tiger is quite honest. Let's do something and wait a little longer!
B: Ah.
A: that one said, hey, someone found a zoo keeper for you! There is also a young man here who advised: "Come on, everyone!"
Shouting slogans at me, trying to scare the tiger. One, two, three, shoot the tiger! One, two, three, shoot the tiger! "I'm scared. Stop yelling,
Don't lose weight, you'll wake the tiger! Do you want to shout slogans? I will do it.
B: You shout?
A: I am very close, and it can hear clearly! Really, one, one, two, three, four, five, go up the mountain and shoot tigers. Tigers don't eat, they only eat big bad guys.
B: Children's songs are all out.
A: Shouting slogans doesn't work here. Tigers don't understand. Hey, you are really a hero. Please come down.
B: Let some people down.
A: So what?
B: people have to feed tigers when they come down.
A: Feeding the tiger is called giving yourself up to save others. Die a fair death, and then you can publish something in the newspaper. If I die, I am nothing. I fed the tiger.
It's worthless at all.
No, no, no. You can be in the newspaper when you die.
A: There are at most two sentences in the newspaper.
Which two sentences,
A: A young worker accidentally fell into the tiger's mouth and died. Relevant departments remind tourists to pay attention to safety. Look, you won't even tell me your name,
I am a negative example.
What do you want to do?
A: So what?
You've been thinking about it for so long. It doesn't work at all.
Don't worry, you let me discuss it with the tiger.
B: discussion? .
Hey, tiger, tiger, go to sleep. Hey, open your eyes and look at me. I'm thin and meatless. If you want to eat, our unit
There is a Tang Jiezhong man who is very fat.
Why do you always miss me?
A: I just let it get up, so we don't really send it.
B: You are a man.
A: Tiger, tiger, if you don't bite me, I promise, I promise not to bite you!
B: The truth.
A: If you let me out, I will live a good life. Let's listen to the leader and do a good job. At home, we respect our parents and our brothers and sisters.
Come out, let's obey the traffic rules and don't spit everywhere.
B: What a mess.
A: Don't look at the mess. You may not remember it by this time.
Oh, you're proud of it.
A: What?
B: You are trying to get away now.
A: Find a way out? That's easy for you to say! What is this place? This is a place for raising tigers. Tigers can't get out. Can I go out?
B: But it's true.
Look at this fence. More than three meters high, no pushing at all. How was it designed at first, without an elevator?
I haven't heard of it.
Hey, what are you thinking up there? What? Find me a city zoo. The breeder has a rest on Sunday, and so does he.
Tigers don't rest! Call the police. What about 1 10, 1 19, fire alarm, Fei Jing, etc? What? Looking for the attachment for a long time
There has been no phone call recently, and the leader of this zoo is too busy to make a phone call. You all go. When you get out of the zoo, take a trackless TV station and look for it at the TV station.
A film crew will film how the tiger ate me later.
What is this for?
A: Make a movie about tigers eating people and sell it to foreigners. Earning some foreign exchange can be counted as making some contributions to the Seventh Five-Year Plan before my brother dies!
B: You are quite conscious.
A: You said I've been thinking about it for a long time. The tiger just breathes and doesn't open its eyes. If you move, I'll gesture to it.
B: Ah.
A: Hum, hum, I dare not move until it moves.
B: Please.
A: Has the tiger degenerated?
B: This tiger can't degenerate.
How did you know?
B: In order to keep tigers wild-
A: Huh?
B: I often throw live chickens and rabbits into the tiger hole.
A: Why throw live chickens and rabbits?
B: Train tigers to catch live food.
A: ouch! Catch live food.
B: Especially on Sundays.
A: Ah.
They want to starve tigers.
A: It's broken! Today is Sunday, and the tiger hasn't eaten yet, just in time for my live food. This damn zoo, I'm not finished with them when I die.
Let them have a good check.
A: Check!
B: It won't happen again.
It won't happen again? Dude, let's just forget it. What's going on here? Laozi's size is a life.
B: Ah.
A: After my death, the director of the zoo was dismissed, and the breeder checked him and deducted his bonus for six months! I was just thinking about this when suddenly a girl's silvery voice came from above: "Hey, everybody untie the belt and twist it into a rope to pull the boy up!" "
B: That's a good idea.
A: I cried as soon as I heard it. What a great idea! I looked up and asked more than 30 people to untie their belts there.
It's really a good style. Look at this girl in a green skirt and yellow nepotism. Hum, hum, this girl is so beautiful.
B: You still have this idea at this time.
A: No, no, you're talking about a girl who stepped forward to save a stranger at this critical moment. Does that mean girls?
-Kind of interesting to me?
B: You are so evil.
What are you talking about? Then you say that there are so many young men standing beside that girl, why does she look at me without looking at anyone?
B: Nonsense. Who let you fall into the lion's den? She's not looking. Who are you looking at?
A: Anyway, I guess you can't see the size from top to bottom. Well, maybe that's my wedding event. It's called that there is always a silver lining behind the dark clouds. Alas, it is usually the hero who saves the beauty. Today, the beauty saves the hero, ahem.
B: Stop it! What time is it? Do you still have the heart to have sex?
what are you reading? Why don't you have any sympathy? As the saying goes, a gentleman talks but doesn't do it. As long as I don't talk or do anything, I will exercise my mind. I'm dying. What did you call me?
Come on, do your thing.
A: At that moment, 30 belts were twisted into ropes and came down smoothly. I looked up, wow, more than 30 people were lifting it.
Pants are looking at me. So many people look at me, so many people can't lose face.
Hmm.
A: This foot hooked the crutch of the old man, and this hand came to me with a fruit knife given by my sister-in-law. This is called knowing that there are tigers in the mountains and leaning towards the mountains.
B: Wow!
A: There is a red sun in my chest.
B: Hmm!
Answer: Dance with your feet, dare to compete with the evil tiger, and never give in to the evil tiger. Grief and indignation will turn into a force to turn the tide. Fight the tiger and follow! I did it.
Strength, alas-I stand up!
You've been sitting down there!
You are talking nonsense. My legs are weak, and I still lie down and don't sit.
B: Climb!
A: As soon as I saw the rope, I saw it in front of my eyes. Bang, I grabbed it and came to the middle without walking a few steps. As the saying goes, a dog jumps over a wall.
People are anxious and energetic. One step, two steps, three steps and four steps are called energetic. Hey, you said you climbed Mount Everest, followed by a big tiger, right?
No, everyone can go in.
You are talking nonsense again.
A: I looked back and saw that the tiger had just opened one eye. Hee hee, this is called victory in sight. Dude won! Goodbye, friends, friends.
Goodbye, friends. Goodbye, friends. ...
Forget it.
Goodbye, tiger. I won't come here again. You are hungry here alone. You are lonely enough, the leader of the zoo.
The tour guide doesn't care about you, so don't be busy. When my buddy goes out, I'll introduce you to a tigress.
You are still talking nonsense.
A: When I get promoted, I'll kick you and tell you that I'm out.
Ah, you are saved.
A: I've been confused by the waves of cheers from the crowd. Ouch.
B: You're really scared this time.
A: I remembered a key question after coming up.
B: What's the problem again?
Where is the girl's petticoat? Come on, untie it and hold it on your chest like a wreath. Afraid, with the girl's body temperature,
With the fragrance of a girl ...
B: Stop smelling it. It smells like sweat.
A: Anyway, try to get close to that girl and give her mamia, the ancient capital of Zhu Jin! I walked askew towards the girl.
I said, what's your hurry?
A: I haven't met anyone yet, so I'm worried.
B: Don't you thank everyone for saving you so much?
A: I'm at a loss. Can I talk?
You shake hands with everyone first.
None of them shook hands with me.
B: Why?
A: They are all carrying pants!
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