How to make people who hate you like you?

Directory method 1: find the source of hostility 1 and find out if the other person really hates you. 2. Get to the bottom of it and find out the root of hatred. 3. Recall your recent contacts. 4. Face the problems between you. Admit it, you can't win everyone's favor. 6. Avoid each other and avoid hatred. 7. look ahead. Method 2: Eliminate hatred 1 with goodwill and lend a helping hand to the so-called "enemy". 2. Let them help you. 3. Take the initiative to chat with each other. 4. Avoid school or company and choose other places to meet. 5. Be kind to his friends. It is an unchangeable fact that no one in the world can please everyone. However, sometimes you will encounter this situation: I don't know why, the people you need and the people you want to get along with just don't like you. Maybe he is your colleague, your superior, or a friend of a friend. This situation will bring a lot of trouble to your work and life. Now you might as well read the following article and learn how to change others' views on you!

Method 1: Find the source of hostility.

1, find out if the other person really hates you. Hatred is a strong emotion, and few people can face it casually. Is he really hostile to you? Or do you overestimate your influence on him? Having said that, you can still refer to the following situation to see if there is really a problem between you. The other person bothers you consciously (for example, deliberately bothers you and interferes with your work).

Pretend not to hear what you say, especially when you try to communicate with him.

Slander you behind your back.

Insult you whenever you get a chance, and make up some words that hurt you out of thin air.

2. Get to the bottom of it and find out the root of hatred. Just ask the other person why he hates you. 90% of the time, those resentful bastards have nothing to say, because resentment is the norm in their lives. Because they can't find a reasonable explanation, they will become tongue-tied and prevaricated when questioned. However, if the other person really has something to say, you can seize this opportunity to improve the relationship: if the other person is uncomfortable, you can show your white teeth and say with a smile, "It doesn't matter. In the future, we can try to be friends. "

If the other person tells you the reason, you say, "Thank you for telling me. I will improve, no longer _ _ _ _ _. " If there are specific improvement measures, be sure to tell each other. For example, you will try to keep the kitchen clean and be a responsible person.

If their reasons are absurd and stupid, it means that "no one is perfect", so you should forget your unhappiness and start over. Don't waste your breath on an asshole who can't get in oil and salt.

They may say, "I just don't like you." If so, you can only accept the fact that some people just don't get along with certain types of people. He won't take it personally, so don't get too involved.

3. Recall your recent contacts. Did you stand him up? Forgot to pay him back? Accidentally insulted him? Or embarrass him? Although it was not intentional, the arrogance and superiority revealed in your words may make him very uncomfortable. For example, when the other party can't even afford a broom, you keep complaining that the servant is late. So, carefully analyze your performance when interacting with each other (you will make mistakes! ), maybe you can find the reason from some trivial things and correct your words and deeds.

4. Face the problems between you. Once you find a problem, you should try to correct it. Don't argue with the other party to show off your words ("I'm not rude, but you are too haggle over every ounce!") " )。 Smile, apologize, make plans when necessary, and try to be friendly next time. Tell him that you know everyone has different opinions, and you just want to solve the problem directly. Most people will show respect for this. It doesn't matter even if the other person is unmoved, at least in this matter, you have shown a mature side. Be honest and don't be reckless and stubborn. If you hit a colleague's car while reversing a car a few weeks ago and the other person bears a grudge against you, you can say, "I'm sorry, it was my fault that I hit your car." I should not be so careless. "I feel very guilty. Let me make it up to you.

If you still don't know where you are wrong, you might as well say, "I really don't understand what happened, but I can see that you are angry." I hope it's not because of me. What happened? "

Admit it, you can't win everyone's favor. Actually, this is a good thing! There are more than 7 billion people in the world. If you live seriously and stick to your true colors, of course you can't get along well with everyone. If you work hard, that person still hates you, which means that he is such a person. You can't change each other, why do you want to do this? In order to change the other person's mind, you have made efforts, so you have to feel at ease, which also shows that your mind is broader than the other person. Hate is an extreme and strong emotion. If someone is determined to hate you for life, it means that his life may be in trouble, so he is so angry and upset.

6. Avoid each other and avoid hatred. Sometimes it's impossible, but try to stay away from them. These people are like stumbling blocks in our lives. It's no good keeping them. Block their phone calls, see fashion as soon as you enter the door, and don't even think about it. As long as it is cut off, most people who bully and are hostile to others can't continue to pick fights. They are like vampires, and we must never stretch out our necks for them to enjoy.

7. look ahead. Make friends with other people. This is the world. Many people like you, and some people hate you. Keep going, and you will meet new partners on the way. If you are depressed because of an individual's hatred, isn't that what he wants? You surpassed each other because you tried to eliminate each other's hatred. As for those stubborn people who nobody likes, let them turn into a wisp of dust and dissipate with the wind. There is a saying that is very accurate-people who hold grudges often don't like anything.

Method 2: Eliminate hatred with goodwill.

1, lend a helping hand to the so-called "enemy". Not only you, I'm afraid no one in the world is willing to help an asshole-but you should. You should try your best to help and support him. Just give a little help, don't be too ostentatious. Your purpose is not to "please each other" or please each other, but simply to do good deeds. So, just keep a low profile: don't let everyone know, or ask the other person to thank you and leave when you're done. If the other person doesn't prepare food at lunch time, you can share your food with him.

If the other person tells a joke, both he and his friends think it's funny, so you'd better laugh along.

If he returns your kindness with anger or hatred, you just walk away with a smile. This is a defense mechanism when they are lonely and their self-esteem is hurt, not real hatred.

2. Let them help you. Research shows that this method is even more effective than helping them. You earned free labor! Your request should be as simple and easy as possible. If you want to take a chance, you can also ask them to help you complete a collaborative task. After the task is completed, they will feel very proud and their views on you will naturally change. This is the best practice of rebellious psychology and the result of "cognitive dissonance". Never hurt yourself in order to please each other. There is no point in doing so. If you know they will make trouble on purpose, give up your plan. You will meet many new friends who will never be cruel to you.

3. Take the initiative to chat with each other. Only by taking this step first can the bad feelings between you be eliminated. Invite him for tea, a movie, a double date, or go to his office to chat with him. In short, take the initiative to go out and break the deadlock with dialogue. Many times, the hatred between people comes from each other's unfamiliarity or ignorance. Of course, due to the hostility of the other party to you, the first few conversations may be awkward or even difficult to continue, but he will eventually be moved. Even though his heart is as hard as a stone, he longs for the company of his friends. "How was your day/weekend?" This sentence is the simplest, but also the most effective. Whenever and wherever, you can use it to express friendliness.

Don't always talk about yourself, ask some questions related to each other. He doesn't like you anymore. Go on saying that he is really not good for improving your relationship, is he? Everyone likes to talk about themselves. When he speaks, pay attention and ask where he comes from. Maybe you can use this topic to make friends with him.

Find the same hobby. If you want to be friends with someone, it is not enough to just eliminate their hostility to you. Try to find some topics. Maybe you all like the same sport, or you all like riding motorcycles, dancing and collecting biscuit boxes.

4. Avoid school or company and choose other places to meet. Invite him to a place and take part in a group activity with you. Most of them will refuse to meet you alone; You won't have fun with people who don't like you. However, when you are with a group of people, the casual atmosphere is very suitable for relaxed and happy conversation, thus creating conditions for the birth of friendship.

5. Be kind to his friends. Once he and his friends realize that you are not a heinous person, they will not hate you. You don't want to rob his friend (you still think he hates you! By the way, you just want to show your courtesy and friendliness. Whether you pay attention or not, his friends will put in a good word for you.

Tip: Don't try your best to please each other. Show your usual appearance. If you are really in such a hurry, maybe you should change your goal and make other friends. Because even if you become friends with this person, you won't trust him as much as you trust other friends. A true friend should accept everything about you.

What type does the other party belong to? You should try to find the answer to this question. Find the similarities between you and take this as an opportunity to improve your relationship.

Be polite to others. When the other party comes to visit, you can ask some basic questions, such as "Would you like something to drink?" "Do you feel cold?" Or "Are you hungry?" .

Don't share some negative personal information to make the conversation more "natural"; The other person will look down on you. You should be positive and optimistic, show your excellent side, such as your advantages, so that the other party will be willing to contact you more.

Don't change your essence. In addition to trying to change your bad habits and bad appearance, you should also make your personality more popular, but don't try to hide your true personality in order to get along with each other. There is a delicate balance between self-improvement and self-deprecation, which needs you to grasp well.

Although you want to make a good impression, the other person will think you are showing off, so keep a low profile.

Always be kind to each other. When making eye contact, don't stare at each other all the time, but look away slightly. A clever woman can't cook without rice-it's no use trying to be friends if the other person doesn't mean it. If the other person is a classmate at school, you should put more energy into your study and make friends with other classmates or teachers. Avoid those rude people who make you unhappy. In addition, always stick to yourself. If the other person doesn't like you now, you don't have to waste your energy making friends with him. True friends should respect each other at all times.

If you still can't win the other person's closeness after repeated kindness, then don't waste your energy on him! You have apologized for all your wrong actions. If the other person is still unmoved, it means that he doesn't deserve to be your friend.

Remember, don't change your personality just because someone doesn't like you. What needs to be changed is your attitude, and you need to face this problem more actively.

Be a kind and useful person. If you make a mistake, admit it boldly and apologize.

Don't give up unless you think all your efforts are in vain. Whenever possible, there must be hope. One day, the other person will see your efforts and finally like you. But remember, sometimes no matter what you do, you still can't change the other person's opinion of you.

Warning not to be depressed by someone's hostility. Not only is it not cost-effective, but it will also make you look irrational.

Sometimes you show your kindness, but the other person still doesn't want to be friends with you. In this case, you should respect his decision. He has no obligation to be your friend, but what you need is a friend who knows how to respect.

Don't retaliate with hatred. Even if someone takes pains to hit you, you can't fight back in the same way. Go on with your life the way you like. You know, those who are keen on hurting others are often riddled with holes.

Be careful not to be used.