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Happiness and innocence - the modern consciousness of the lovely old lady Jia Mu

Jia Mu in "A Dream of Red Mansions" is the most fun-loving and playful person. She is full of interest in life and has good taste. Not only does she have fun herself, but she is basically the only elder who wants her children and grandchildren to be happy as well: I take you to have fun, and you won’t feel guilty about your happiness!

Other elders often cannot see their children and grandchildren happy. How dare you be happy if you don't do your job properly and don't study? You are shameless! I despise your happiness! Jia Zheng himself loved reading, but Baoyu's favorite extracurricular book "The Romance of the West Chamber", would Baoyu dare to read it in front of him? Baoyu's happy life was described by Jia Zheng as "playing around every day, gradually becoming lazy". If you don't "study hard, you have to be careful!" Baoyu made friends with actors outside, and he was so angry that "his eyes turned red and purple". Parents, a child's true happiness will inevitably bring a sense of shame and guilt.

Many children, today's children, are not even willing or dare to tell their parents about the games they play, the friends they make, the various items they buy, including their Internet habits, because they have had this sin since they were young. Feeling: I am not qualified to be happy in front of my elders. The source of my happiness is too shy to see the light of day, let alone them.

But not Jia Mu. Not only "I am happy so you are happy", I also bring you happiness! There are too many scenes in the book where the old lady leads the crowd. Although a lot of this music is mediocre like dominoes and mahjong, it is not low-level fun; some of it is the most basic happiness of human beings, the happiness of interesting souls. How many classic literary stories have stayed in the "Grand View Garden of Shi Taijun's Two Banquets"! She is someone who is capable of loving herself. If you love yourself and don't feel guilty about being happy, you will love others and hope that others will be happy too. Shi Taijun is great about this.

Jia Mu even entertained the old-fashioned Jia Zheng and the vulgar Jia She. At the family banquet, the unsmiling Mr. Zheng told a joke about "being afraid of his wife". Mr. She told He made a joke about his mother's partiality and laughed with the ladies - this is simply a fantasy! Sister Feng tells jokes as a matter of course, but Jia Zheng tells jokes? The old man, who looked sanctimonious and full of benevolence and morality in front of his children and nephews, returned to his humanity in front of Jia Mu. Even if it's just for a moment.

You must know that the old lady is not without a job. She must deal with all the etiquette in the palace and entertain relatives and friends. During New Years, festivals and other important occasions, Jia Mu often went to the palace to pay homage at the fifth watch. She also had to make up according to style and wear all those heavy accessories, no matter it was bone-chillingly cold in the middle of the night. , it was still hot and sweaty in the dog days of summer. The old lady had to go to express gratitude, worship and perform courtesy on behalf of the big family. It was not easy for her. But this does not hinder her love for life.

In the fifth chapter of the book, the Ningguo Mansion invites the old lady to enjoy the flowers. He says that Jia Mu has always been "in a high spirits" and loves to play and knows how to play. How could she play? When you listen to a play, you can become a director, telling the actors how to perform more aesthetically. When you eat, you should not only maintain your health but also pay attention to it. The home soft decoration design is quite tasteful. "The best is to clean the house." Although I can't play chess, calligraphy and painting in person, I can Will appreciate it. At the Lantern Festival family dinner, she asked her family's opera troupe Fangguan to sing "Looking for Dreams". As long as "the violin and the Xiaoguan were played, and the sheng and flute were not used at all," Aunt Xue lamented, "I have seen hundreds of performances, but I have never seen this before." "Using the flute." She also asked Kui Guan to sing "Huiming's Message" without wiping her face (no need to use costumes and props), but "if it saves a little effort, I won't do it." She knows how to appreciate art. Three flavors! In the Grand View Garden, Jia Mu asked the orchestra to play with the sound of water from the lotus root and champagne pavilion. "After a while, I could only hear the melodious flute and the sheng and flute playing simultaneously. It was the time when the wind was refreshing, and the sound of music came through the forest and the water. "Nature makes people feel happy and refreshed." I was fascinated by it.

Jia Mu appreciates beauty, beautiful everything, especially youthful and beautiful life. Young girls are her sweethearts. From her granddaughters at home to her granddaughter Lin Daiyu, Xue Baochai and Shi Xiangyun from relatives, and the newcomer Xue Baoqin, she loves them all very much and stays by her side. She even stayed with Xiluan and Fourth Sister, poor relatives, for a few days, and specially sent someone to tell her servants not to treat them lightly. From this point of view, Jia's mother is really not too patriarchal. Although Jia Baoyu is her most beloved grandson, she gave Xue Baoqin (only the most precious grandson) a very precious coat made of wild duck hair. One piece), Baoyu also gave a piece of "bird gold", which is of similar grade. So even the maids were joking: "The old lady loves Sister Qin so much, is it Baoyu who is annoyed?"

An old person has a heart that loves beauty and youth, and her social personality is sound.

Jia Mu can find happiness in everything in life. Wiping dominoes, chatting and laughing with Aunt Xue, listening to plays, admiring flowers, going to the garden, taking a boat ride, playing with home furnishings, going out to temples, chatting with relatives and friends, organizing various family banquets - seeing her walking happily In the Snow Grand View Garden, looking at the newly picked plum blossoms, I said, "What a handsome plum blossom! You will be happy, I'm here!" That heart that loves life is ready to come out!

Jia’s mother’s spoken language is “pleasure and happiness”, even “pain and happiness”. The most commendable thing is that she hopes that everyone, including her sons and grandchildren, will also treat life with this attitude. See your children happy and encourage them to be happy. One time, she looked for Baoyu all the time. The nurses and maids said that Baoyu was in Miss Lin's room. Mother Jia was very happy: "Okay, okay, okay! Let the sisters play together. I just arrested him." Let him be happy for a while." She didn't want Baoyu to come to her immediately (even though she was still looking for him), she didn't want to control him, but she wanted to be happy because he was happy.

Jia Mu is not willing for her children and grandchildren to completely ignore the relationship between husband and wife in order to fulfill their filial piety. Although this view of not being ashamed to talk about sex has a decadent side, such as her tolerance for Jia Lian's cheating, it is still There is a positive side: not putting a shameful label on sex. She hopes that the couple will be reunited, happy and have a certain degree of modern consciousness. On the night of the Mid-Autumn Festival, she said to Mrs. You not to separate her husband and wife, "No way, no way. You little couple, please don't have a reunion tonight, why are you delaying it for me." Mrs. You was quite embarrassed; Jia Mu also said It was mentioned twice that "Rong'er just sat with your wife, and they were all reunited." In the feudal etiquette system, children can be killed for the sake of filial piety, let alone the love between husband and wife (look at those perverted stories in "Twenty-Four Filial Piety"). Jia Mu can think of and talk about this, which is already very modern and humane. , which other elder would say something that brings shame?

I have to say, this old lady is cute. Baoyu has followed her since childhood and is blessed.

How did the old lady develop the ability to love herself and others? Shi Taijun's parents do not appear in the book, but it can be deduced that the prototype of Jia Mu did have a pretty good family education.

In Chapter 38, Jia Mu said: "When I was a child, there was such a pavilion at home, called 'Chenxia Pavilion'. I was only as old as them at that time, and together with my sisters Let’s play every day. “Look, Shi Taijun’s parents are very open-minded and let her and her sisters play every day! How nice!

Moreover, Jia Mu also had a naughty side: "Who would have thought that I lost my footing and fell down that day, and almost drowned. I managed to save myself, but my head was hit by a wooden nail. Everyone was surprised. I was afraid that I would not survive after menstrual bleeding, but unexpectedly I got better.”

Wow, a girl was running around every day, fell into the water, and broke her head when she was rescued. , Jia Mu really grew up under an open family education! Being allowed to be naughty is a blessing.

Not only is she naughty, she can also watch plays with her parents and learn art appreciation. In the fifty-fourth chapter "Shi Taijun Breaks the Cliché", Jia Mu pointed at Shi Xiangyun and said: "I am as old as her During the season, his grandfather had a small opera troupe, and a piano player joined in, such as "Listening to the Qin" in "The Romance of the West Chamber", "Qin Tiao" in "The Story of the Hosta", and "Eighteen Beats of Hu Jia" in "Continuing the Pipa" ”, it has become real, how can it be better than this? ”

Wow, before Ms. Shi left the cabinet, she could go to the theater and appreciate art with the adults in her family without being rejected as a girl. , and you can watch dramas like "The Romance of the West Chamber"! Didn't Jia Baoyu hide from reading the extracurricular book "The West Chamber" because he was afraid that people would tell me about Jia Zheng? Miss Shi is so blessed!

She was raised rich since she was a child, and her biological daughter Jia Min and grandson Jia Baoyu were all raised rich.

The relaxed and democratic family education enabled Miss Shi to still maintain the innocence of human nature after she became Mrs. Shi and finally Taijun Shi: happy and guiltless! People have the right to pursue happiness and love life!

So, the character development of her son Jia She Jia Zheng is not reasonable? I have read a lot of people's research, and they all say that the prototype of Jia Zheng was adopted to Jia's mother, that is, Jia Zheng and Jia She were not born by Jia's mother. This explanation is more reasonable.

This lesson I learned from Jia Mu reminds me of what Zhan Danian, a family education expert, said, "There are tips for dealing with children playing with mobile phones - when parents are having fun, mobile phones are no longer fun." That is, if parents do not have mobile phones for fun and cannot create real-life emotional and creative experiences, children will easily become addicted to mobile phones. Many children do not play with mobile phones, but feel that life is boring and are "played by mobile phones".

When children participate in real-life practical creation, art appreciation, artistic creation, and sports, that is true happiness. Even if it’s making scrambled eggs with tomatoes or painting a picture.

I hope that we, as parents, can take our children to be happy, and that it is not the stimulation of consumption and the Internet, but the happiness that can create real-life emotional and creative experiences, as truly precious as diamonds. The joy of people rather than consuming machines.

I hope parents can be their true selves and have the ability to love themselves and make themselves happy. In this way, their children will tell you about the games they play, the friends they make, and the various items they buy, including The habit of surfing the Internet without feeling guilty: the source of my happiness is no longer ashamed to see the light of day, and I am no longer ashamed to have fun with my parents.