How can I write to my parents to apologize for being caught in puppy love?

Puppy love, also known as adolescent love, refers to the establishment of a love relationship between underage men and women or their interest in different sex, infatuation or secret love. In China, the word "puppy love" has the negative emotional color of elders, and generally refers to the love between teenagers under 18 years old, especially between primary and secondary school students. Twenty years' investigation in China shows that many people had feelings in middle school. Most of them are unrequited love and unrequited love. Only when you have a good impression on each other can you develop into puppy love. Puppy love behavior is based on the sexual and physical development of teenagers, and it is also the practice of transforming psychology into behavior. To some extent, puppy love is not a bad thing. Love makes people excited and easier to learn. As long as you don't miss the big picture, parents had better not try to stop it.

Fuzzy folding edits this paragraph.

Teenagers don't know the outcome of puppy love. Teenagers who are in puppy love are only eager to contact the opposite sex alone, but lack a clear understanding of the future family formation, the relationship between love and school, and the difference between friendship and love.

Contradictory folding edits this paragraph.

Teenagers who are puppy love are full of contradictions in their hearts. They want to get in touch with the opposite sex they like, but they are afraid of being discovered by their parents. It can be said that in the process of puppy love, pleasure and pain coexist. For the unrequited puppy lovers, this contradiction is also manifested in the contradiction of whether to confess (confess) to the admirer.

Variance folding edit this paragraph.

Friendship is full of changes and extremely unstable, because teenagers often lack the skills and experience to deal with interpersonal relationships, which leads to mutual lack of trust; Relationships are generally difficult to last. It is this that often causes psychological pain to both sides.

Differentially folded edit this paragraph.

Teenagers' puppy love behavior is obviously different. In the way of behavior, it is extremely hidden, so it is difficult for parents and teachers to understand their feelings through letters, telephone calls or the Internet, but some teenagers will openly love each other on many occasions and go out in pairs.

To some extent, most puppy lovers mainly exchange feelings or play together; From the perspective of interpersonal relationship, there are generally no friends beyond the normal relationship, but there are also some puppy lovers who have developed deep relationships, and sometimes even have sex in addition to exchanging feelings.

In terms of age preference, girls usually like boys who are older and more mature than themselves, while boys usually like girls who are younger than themselves and reflect their masculinity in communication. Some psychologists believe that girls will take the initiative at the same age, but according to the actual situation, more boys take the initiative. This is still inconclusive.

Type, fold and edit this paragraph.

The types of puppy love can be summarized into the following eight types:

Love to fold and edit this paragraph

This kind of teenager falls in love with each other. This kind of puppy love is very common. According to the different reasons of love, it can be divided into the following three categories:

(1) instrument folding

This kind of puppy love is caused by the external appearance of loving each other, which is also the most common, but it is also the most difficult to sustain and stabilize. There are always handsome guys and beautiful women in school who are envied by the opposite sex, which includes this factor.

(2) special folding

This is puppy love caused by appreciating each other's ability or their own expertise. This kind of puppy love is often the initiative of girls.

(3) Character folding

This kind of puppy love is produced because I like some qualities that I admire in the other person and lasts for a long time.

Curious about folding and editing this paragraph.

This is the phenomenon of puppy love because of curiosity about the opposite sex. With the continuous development of sexual consciousness, teenagers will be curious about the body, life, psychology and attitude of the opposite sex, which is a psychological phenomenon of teenagers. Teenagers are prone to sexual impulses, thus maintaining a sensitive attitude towards the opposite sex. In order to satisfy this curiosity, they made friends with the opposite sex.

Imitate folding and edit this paragraph.

This is the phenomenon of puppy love caused by imitating this behavior in society, film and television works, newspapers and books.

Consistency type

This is the phenomenon of puppy love caused by the pressure of peers around. For example, a love relationship that doesn't exist in the first place may be invented by people around you, that is, "rumors" or "gossip". In such an environment, under the pressure of public opinion, it is easy to admire it.

Fold and edit this paragraph happily

Adolescent men and women, as classmates or even deskmates, will have a more detailed and thorough understanding of each other because of more communication and information transmission. In this case, puppy love is prone to occur. This is also an important reason for "classmate love" or even "deskmate love".

Compensated folding editing this paragraph

Some teenagers suffer setbacks in their study and life, which damages their self-esteem. In order to achieve the purpose of venting, they often look for the opposite sex to forget their pain and seek compensation. This kind of puppy love is integrated with real feelings and is easy to develop and deepen.

Reverse folding to edit this paragraph

Due to social consciousness and public opinion, teenagers' sexual intercourse is often improperly interfered by their parents and teachers, which easily induces their psychology of "you forbid me to do this, but I will do it anyway". Under the influence of this rebellious mentality, normal and appropriate heterosexual communication may rapidly develop into puppy love.

Pathological folding editing this paragraph.

In contemporary society, superior nutritional conditions can easily lead to overnutrition, the role of sex hormones contained in food, various special physiological diseases, family inheritance and other factors, which can easily lead to precocious puberty and even sexual metamorphosis of teenagers. This is the main objective factor that induces adolescent puppy love.

The above types are also common in adult love, especially for the first time, and of course there are people who have never experienced puppy love. And because adults are more powerful and knowledgeable, the same consequences are worse than those of puppy love children.

The reason is to fold and edit this paragraph

1. Fold for physiological reasons

15 ~ 18-year-old female students have just formed their second sexual characteristics, and the physiological changes have caused subtle changes in their sexual psychology. On the one hand, they are afraid that others will discover their physiological changes and feel shy. On the other hand, they hope that the opposite sex of the same age can notice their maturity and pay attention to dressing and makeup. In the process of this change, they hope to associate with the opposite sex of the same age. The attraction of the opposite sex is a normal psychological activity of human beings and also an instinct of human beings. Because girls' sexual characteristics develop earlier than boys', female students' psychology of pursuing the opposite sex is earlier than boys'. Girls of this age not only have the psychological needs of "heterosexual love", but also have a weak will to self-control, and are easy to fall into the emotional whirlpool of puppy love and cannot extricate themselves or make sexual mistakes. So it is reasonable for some people to say that early youth is a dangerous age. It should be pointed out that girls' sexual psychology in their early youth is hazy or idealistic, and even some girls regard the man they love as an idol and have a wrong view of love. For example, a female middle school student in a certain place expressed her love to the married class teacher many times and dropped out of school and ran away from home because the teacher refused. The survey shows that the phenomenon of puppy love among individual female students occurs in the upper grades of primary school, slightly more in junior high school, and more common in senior high school. Therefore, it is necessary to strengthen the education and guidance of sexual psychology and adolescent physical health knowledge for female students in this period, so that they can spend this dangerous period healthily.

2. Fold because of the atmosphere

The psychological stimulation of competing with each other stimulates the openness of puppy love behavior: it is understood that some school students are influenced by classmates or close friends and join the ranks of puppy love in order to lose face. Girls in early adolescence like to form small groups in groups of three or five, while students in boarding schools often form different small groups, and some small groups are small social circles of puppy love allies. Good friends talk about everything together, and those who fall in love first will inevitably introduce their puppy love experiences to their friends. Under the example of friends, some girls consciously choose their own "Prince Charming" and show that they are not worse than others by becoming two-way friends. It doesn't matter if there is no "object". The pioneer of puppy love will play the role of matchmaker. Under the psychological effect of refusing to lose to others, groups of young girls began to fall in love. They sometimes compare with each other and sometimes envy each other, making students' puppy love open. For example, in the survey, a female student said, "My partner and I are Lao Tie". In some schools, girls even openly bring puppy love objects to school to show off, and even some girls lead to sexual mistakes. For example, a middle school found someone in the girls' dormitory during the holiday, and the teacher on duty found two pairs of boys and girls living together in the same room for many days.

3. Reverse psychological folding

The repressive education of parents and teachers has aroused the rebellious psychology of female students' puppy love: because of the high voice against puppy love in society, many parents are afraid that their daughters will delay their studies or make mistakes because of puppy love, and they have taken restrictive measures against their daughters' heterosexual contacts. However, teachers in some schools are afraid that students will make mistakes in puppy love, regard puppy love as a scourge, and are indifferent to the communication between boys and girls. So parents and teachers * * * adopted educational countermeasures of suppression and restriction. Some parents get to the bottom of their daughter's communication with boys, restrict them everywhere, and even invade their daughter's privacy by eavesdropping on the phone, peeking at diaries, peeking at letters and so on. Sometimes, without knowing the situation, I criticize my daughter's communication with boys at random, or stare at visiting boys, which seriously hurts girls' feelings. However, some teachers have also adopted restrictive policies on the communication between boys and girls, often expressing doubts about the communication between boys and girls, and even taking wrong measures such as public criticism and punishment for the newly emerging puppy love phenomenon. Young girls in their early years have a strong sense of independence and resistance, and they have their own philosophy. Under the high-pressure policy, they will show all kinds of resistance. Originally, boys and girls were communicating normally, but suddenly there was the suppression and restriction of authority. Under the action of rebellious psychology, the restricted parties will immediately increase the number of contacts, and even have subtle psychological changes, resulting in puppy love. For example, a girl from a technical secondary school in a city and a boy from a high school have been going back and forth several times, and her father and wife, who are cadres in an institution, scold and beat their children. As a result, the girl who has no feelings for love went to the boy's house to seek protection. Because she felt warm in the boy's house, the girl publicly told her parents, "I don't want him to get married", forcing her parents to raise a white flag. It can be seen that excessive repression and restrictions will make boys and girls have rebellious puppy love.

Scientific folding editing this paragraph

Some emerging educators, psychologists and students think that the word "puppy love" is unscientific. Because teenagers accelerate their development in adolescence, they gradually mature sexually after the emergence of secondary sexual characteristics, and there is an adult trend both physically and psychologically. Therefore, it is a common situation in adolescence to have a good impression on the opposite sex or to have love behavior, which is the necessity of physical and psychological development. It should not be described as "puppy love" with subjective feelings.

In China, after 20 years of investigation, it is found that few people have never had feelings in middle school. Most of them are unrequited love and unrequited love. Only when we have a good impression on each other can we develop into love.

Adolescence love behavior is the practice of teenagers' psychological transformation into behavior on the basis of sexual and physical development. In China, traditional elders and exam-oriented educators generally believe that adolescent love will bring many problems, such as affecting teenagers' exam-oriented ability and academic performance, or puppy love often ends in failure, and puppy love can rarely be together for life. However, some educators and parents of teenagers believe that puppy love is teenagers' exploration and research on the relationship between men and women, preparing for future love and marriage, and should not be excessively prohibited or suppressed.

Evaluate this paragraph of folding editing.

The general view of China culture and society is that puppy love is harmful to the future of teenagers. One of the most important reasons is that the education system is extremely competitive and the society is extremely utilitarian. Newspapers and other media also report the harm of puppy love to students and parents' worries. This phenomenon also reflects the monopoly of adult society on the mainstream discourse right from a certain aspect.

However, for teenagers with relatively poor self-control, it is not easy to grasp the discretion and not easily cross the border. Many people think that puppy love is inevitable, but for teenagers who are puppy love, proper self-control and proper guidance and help from the outside world are possible and possible.

Because the subject of puppy love is physically immature, it is not easy to have sexual impulses compared with teenagers, which makes puppy love behavior feel purer, more sacred, better and often more memorable. From this point of view, puppy love is not a bad thing, and it is even worth promoting, at least it will not prevent her from happening. But it must be under the condition of not causing harm to the subject. Therefore, the following suggestions are put forward for teenagers with puppy love tendency: 1, and the awareness of self-protection must be improved. 2. Try not to let puppy love affect normal study. Don't let puppy love do harm to your body and mind.

In fact, the purest feelings in a person's life are in this period. At that time, we watched the blue sky and white clouds, the moon and stars, the leaves slipping quietly from the branches and the birds chasing happily in the air. .......

The romantic happiness at that time was short-lived. It is because of the brevity that there are unforgettable memories. Sweet and happy memories that are worth cherishing for a lifetime, the shorter they are, the more they are worth cherishing.

Allow folding to edit this paragraph.

Some open-minded parents and quality education circles will allow teenagers to fall in love, because love is the human rights and freedom of teenagers. Some educators, parents and students believe that puppy love has the following advantages:

Cultivate interpersonal skills and independence. Be familiar with and understand love, and lay the foundation for future love. Satisfy teenagers' desire to get close to the opposite sex. Relieve the pressure of study and life and gain more positive emotions. Cultivate courage and the ability to withstand setbacks. Have emotional sustenance, so that the spirit does not feel empty and cultivate aesthetic ability. Improve emotional intelligence. Cultivate the ability to distinguish others, especially the opposite sex. Improve self-confidence. Compared with adult love, adolescent love is purer and involves less sex and interests. Adolescence love provides inspiration for many cultural products, such as some romance novels, cartoons and love video games.

Objection to folding and editing this paragraph

Adolescence love is hard to be recognized by exam-oriented educators and traditional parents in China. Also known as puppy love. The following are some hazards summarized by some exam-oriented educators:

It affects the ability to take exams and test scores, making it impossible for teenagers to become "talents" under the standards of exam-oriented education. Giving teenagers more freedom and space makes them difficult to manage, which goes against the original intention of exam-oriented education. Adolescent love is related to premature sexual behavior, which is harmful to teenagers' physical and mental health. The conservative thought that appeared in the history of China does not allow men and women to fall in love, and the love behavior in adolescence is even more contrary to this thought.

Other relevant folds edit this paragraph.

In western society, it is considered normal for teenagers to fall in love, kiss and hug (besides, western society is more open and hugs between friends of the opposite sex are completely acceptable).

As long as they don't have sex or lead to teenage pregnancy, even in a conservative religious family, high school students over 16 will not be restricted from falling in love. In recent years, although some religious people have raised objections to unmarried sex, they only advocate premarital chastity, rather than prohibiting teenagers from falling in love.

In fact, in the west, the word "puppy love" does not exist. In China's cultural circle, Japan, South Korea, Taiwan, Vietnam and other countries and regions, and even East Asia as a whole, are not as hostile to adolescent love as Chinese mainland. However, most westerners think it is incomprehensible that China schools restrict students from falling in love.

In the old society of China, most marriages were arranged by parents. Although there are many young sons-in-law and few couples, it can only be called early marriage and early childbearing. As for love, it is not allowed at any age, not only puppy love is considered bad.

Affect folding Edit this paragraph.

Unfavorable folding

Due to the severe pressure from family, school and society, students who are puppy love have great pressure and contradictions in all aspects. Dog lovers may be distracted, which changes their interests and goals. It can be seen that the damage caused by puppy love is mainly not because of puppy love itself, but because of various pressures brought by puppy love.

Physically: Because many puppy lovers are emotionally unstable, impulsive, emotional and have poor self-control, they often have various negative emotions, which will affect their health. This will lead to a series of physical discomfort, and over time, symptoms such as digestive tract diseases and hypoglycemia may occur.

Psychologically: For puppy love, puppy love is a process full of joy and depression. Because of their love for each other, puppy lovers often change their mood because of each other's harsh requirements; There is also pressure from parents, classmates and teachers because of puppy love, which leads to psychological imbalance; When they can't meet their lover, puppy lovers tend to be restless, addicted to fantasy and beg for comfort in fantasy. If this psychology develops too deeply, a few people will have sex with the opposite sex because they can't restrain their emotions.

Interference learning folding editing this paragraph

It is very common that teenagers have poor self-control ability, often have no intention to study, and their grades drop. This is the most important reason why people who oppose puppy love oppose puppy love. Everything affects everyone differently. What is good for others may be bad for you, and so is puppy love. It depends on how you handle this matter.

May lead to abnormal behavior.

Many psychologists believe that teenagers are enthusiastic, impulsive and have poor self-control ability. Therefore, many boys and girls in love can't control their feelings and have sex prematurely. This is the most serious harm caused by puppy love to both sides' bodies and minds.

Could lead to a crime. Fold and edit this paragraph.

Dog lovers are generally young and energetic, and are very sensitive to some events. Especially in front of his girlfriend, boys are angry with some behaviors that make them "jealous" and fight with some people, which leads to crimes.

On the other hand, due to the parents' lack of support, the money cost of falling in love can not be obtained, which induces the idea of stealing. This is the most serious harm of puppy love to society.

Fold the positive meaning and edit this paragraph.

Undeniably, in some cases, puppy love also has its advantages, which is very common among students. Some students think that puppy lovers often catch up with each other in grades to get each other's pleasure and preference, thus making their grades rise; There are also some bad characters and habits, which have been corrected because they have a kind of worship for someone, restrain themselves from liking anything everywhere in life, and take the standard of worship as the criterion of life. Puppy love can also make people exercise their social skills and enhance interpersonal relationships.

Guide measures fold edit this paragraph.

First, raise awareness, give priority to persuasion, and do not blindly criticize or brutally stifle.

Puppy love usually refers to the love behavior of teenagers who are not completely independent in life and economy and far below the legal age for marriage. The attitude towards this problem can only be positive guidance and appropriate restrictions, rather than blind criticism and rude strangulation. Otherwise, it is likely to cause children's rebellious psychology or fear, which will lead to the inability to correctly handle the relationship with the opposite sex, thus laying a hidden danger for future love and marriage.

"It is not surprising to simply express good feelings," many teachers said. This kind of communication is not as complicated as adults. However, the vague concept of gender in primary school students' minds will lead them to behave "out of line". Therefore, in the face of "puppy love" behavior of primary and secondary school students, teachers (especially class teachers) and parents should give appropriate guidance and tell them what healthy "love" is.

Second, families and schools should unite, strengthen communication, and give respect and care in life and emotion.

Among the primary and middle school students who are puppy love, there are many families with problems. Some families have divorced parents, some have domestic violence, some have a tense relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, and so on. Children in these families do not enjoy the tolerance and care among family members in their lives, and they lack warmth and respect emotionally. Adults are tired of life, busy with work, have no time to pay attention to children's needs, and ignore their physical and psychological development during their growth. Therefore, children who grow up in such a family environment are very eager for someone to share his or her troubles and for someone to understand and comfort him or her. At this time, the opposite sex students in "Seeds of Love" became the best confidants.

Teachers and parents often regard their children's puppy love as a scourge. Criticism and reprimand are commonplace, and many people abuse and beat them. The personality of young students is still in a relatively imperfect stage, and teachers' criticism, parents' scolding and the pressure of study will all become the driving force for their young minds to lean towards the opposite sex of the same age. Therefore, for children's puppy love behavior, the first thing teachers and parents should do is not reprimand and abuse their children, but reflect on whether they often communicate with their children in daily life and whether they give them enough respect and warmth. When children regard teachers and parents as their friends, they are willing to communicate with him in any way; When teachers and parents become children's close friends and trusted people, they can help children analyze the pros and cons rationally, and the harm of puppy love will not be very serious.

Third, carry out activities, love and help each other, and actively advocate healthy communication with the opposite sex.

In adolescence, we have a hazy affection for the opposite sex, and even have a certain degree of "secret love", which may be the same experience that each of us has had, and this is also a normal psychological process. Therefore, when dealing with this problem, we should not prematurely define this ideological tendency of students as puppy love. In general, these students just show too close at first. However, because our teachers and parents think they are arrogant, immoral, excessively harsh criticism and harsh scolding, children will be frightened at once. In their isolated state, the behavior of teachers and parents often encourages children's puppy love. Therefore, we should be alert to the problem of puppy love, but we should not be too strict.

The prevention of puppy love is still to carry out targeted collective activities, embody the spirit of unity, friendship and mutual assistance, and actively advocate healthy communication between children and heterosexual partners. Many examples and survey results show that extensive and distant communication with heterosexual partners can help satisfy their concentration and curiosity about the opposite sex and reduce the tendency of "puppy love".

Puppy love is very harmful. Once primary and secondary school students get caught up in it, they will shift their energy and time to the relationship between men and women. Because young men and women are immature in psychology and thought, it is difficult to control themselves and cannot extricate themselves. When dealing with children's problems, first of all, don't be suspicious, and don't mistake the general relationship between classmates and friends for puppy love. It is necessary to carefully observe and analyze and judge whether the child is really puppy love.

Secondly, parents should treat this phenomenon correctly, objectively judge whether it affects normal learning, and then give correct guidance. If the above situation has affected learning, then we must find a way to intervene. Of course, children who are in puppy love should not be as impatient and rude as the mother, but should adopt a way that children can accept, seriously talk to their children about the harm of puppy love, and guide them out of the misunderstanding of sexual psychological development.

In fact, puppy love psychological counseling experts say that the best way to prevent children from having "opposite sex-too intimate communication" is not only to pay attention to children's academic performance, but also to learn to pay attention to children's emotions, have more time to communicate with children, and care for children in many ways.