Funny copywriting in friends circle

1. I wanted to eat my sadness in one bite, but I became fat in one bite.

Making money is a kind of ability, and spending money is a kind of technology. My ability is limited, but my technology is quite high.

3. You are always, intermittently complacent, constantly eating and dying, planning one day and lying dead for one year.

Those who can't lose weight are always in turmoil, and those who don't eat fat are fearless.

There are two ways. One is beautiful and the other is ugly. I belong to the middle, so ugly!

6. When I was a child, my mother kindly said to me: Good boy, you will never starve to death if you learn this skill. So my mother taught me to eat.

7. God spread wisdom to the world, and I wisely held an umbrella.

Eight. At present, the only thing that can be put down is chopsticks, and the only thing that can't be put down is the bed.

The real meaning of the iron rice bowl is not to eat in one place for a lifetime, but to eat in every place for a lifetime.

10. reasons for being single so far: acquaintances are not easy to start, and strangers are not easy to talk.

If you think you are as tired as a dog all day, you really misunderstand. Dogs are not as tired as you.

12. Holding a hot, rechargeable mobile phone, regardless of life and death, is a rare heroic moment in my life.

13. Actually, I'm not nearsighted. I just blurred my eyes to look down on everything in the world.

14. Holding a courier feels like reuniting with your long-lost flesh and blood, but often after unpacking, you find that the child looks like Lao Wang next door.

15. Every time you scold others, have you considered their feelings? Anyway, I do. I try not to use dialect, for fear that the other party will not understand.

16. If life deceives you, don't be sad, don't be impatient, get used to it after being cheated several times.

17. There is no love or hate for no reason in the world, only obesity for no reason.

18. Falling in love is like playing on the seesaw. Either side suddenly walks away or gets fat, which will make the whole game very dangerous.

Actually, looks are not important. The most important thing in love is feeling. I have no feeling for ugly things.

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10. If you have a fever at home, you will stick to surfing the Internet. If you sneeze at school, you will think it is terminal cancer.

2 1. Children living on campus: Monday is the richest man, Monday.

Second, local tyrants, Zhou.

The third is a civilian, Zhou.

Fourth, poor wretch, Zhou

Five ruined.

Twenty-two Staying up late is too harmful. You will become ugly, stupid, and then suddenly die. I suggest you stay up all night.

Twenty-three I have been determined to be a wise man since I was a child, but I have only succeeded in half, and it is still the second half.

24. As soon as I reviewed, I found that other people's minds were full of printers, tape recorders and digital cameras, and only mine was a soymilk machine.

Twenty-five You are young, but you carry a lot of weight. The balance is not much, but I want to buy a lot.

Twenty-six. I told myself a good night story, and the plot was ups and downs and exciting. Now I'm too involved in the play to be sleepy to chase the murderer.

27. Examinations are like getting sick. Depression before the exam, amnesia during the exam. After the exam, my condition began to improve. When I got the test paper back, I had a heart attack.

I hope it is not an alarm clock but a dream that wakes you up every day, but my dream is not to get up.

Twenty-nine Anyway, there are two kinds of people who can play with me, one is tolerant of my mental illness, and the other is as psychological as me.

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10. Say that money is a sin and everyone is fishing; Say beauty is a disaster, everyone wants it; It is said that the height is too cold and everyone is climbing; Say that alcohol and tobacco hurt the body and don't quit; Say heaven is the best, don't go.