It may be a disease for parents to always yell at their children. To be a good parent, "stop yelling" is the first step.

We can’t help but yell at our children. After yelling at them, we feel very pitiful about them.

I suddenly heard a fierce quarrel in my sleep in the middle of the night last night. At first I thought it was a couple quarreling, but later I found out that it was the child who was not sleeping and the mother was scolding the child.

Occasionally there were sounds of crying, and then I heard my mother’s roar: You cry again! ! Then there was the sound of mother smashing things.

After a while, it finally calmed down, but then I couldn’t fall asleep: How many parents yelled at their children while silently regretting it?

What changes have you made after becoming a mother? Every time I see this question, what I want to say the most is: maybe my voice is getting louder!

Maybe you will regret it after yelling at your child, but you just don’t understand why you couldn’t control your emotions in the first place. After analyzing the psychology of countless mothers yelling at their children, we have concluded the following:

1) Mothers raising their babies alone: ??What I mean by raising my babies alone here does not just mean a stay-at-home mother; Even though Mom is a stay-at-home mother, there is almost no one around her who can help, including Dad.

@小小: When I finished feeding the baby, changed the diaper and put the baby to sleep, I looked at my husband who was snoring next to me, and I stood on the floor of the bedroom unable to sleep. At that moment I felt I felt so much like a ghost that I really had the urge to jump at that moment.

Being a stay-at-home mother is not scary. What is scary is that the men around you are neither cold nor hot, nor do they know how to take on the task of raising a baby with you.

2) Not able to manage emotions: Some people have bad tempers and cannot help but lose their temper over trivial matters, while some people are well-educated and do not lose their temper easily. In fact, this is not innate, but the latter understands the importance of managing emotions.

If you have a poor ability to manage your emotions, you will usually have trouble managing your emotions when you have a baby and become a parent, because giving birth and raising a baby is much more difficult than you imagine. If you don’t manage your emotions well, It’s easy to vent your emotions on your children.

3) Anxiety about raising babies: Many people think that it is easy for women to raise babies at home, and they cannot understand why good people have anxiety disorders?

In fact, it is not difficult to understand that after a woman gives birth to a baby, her body hormones change, and she goes through a painful birth experience, making it difficult to get over the pain of childbirth.

Bringing up a baby is even more troublesome and laborious. Usually, you don’t sleep well in the first three years after giving birth. Long-term sleep deprivation and reverse sleep time will affect a person’s health.

1) It may reflect your pathology: Maybe you have never thought about it deeply, but if you yell at your children very frequently, then it may really be a pathology.

What is reflected is your mental health problem, which needs to be adjusted in time.

2) Hurt children: Yelling at children not only harms the child psychologically, but also causes a blow to the child's IQ and self-confidence.

The most intuitive manifestation is that the child is very timid and introverted. This is one kind, and the other is that the child also becomes grumpy and has difficulty controlling his emotions.

In fact, we could have spoken properly. Most of the time when we yell at our children, it is not because of the size of the mistakes the children make, but because we cannot control our emotions at that moment.

Once I wanted to take my baby downstairs for a walk, and he kept playing there while I was changing clothes. He did not actively cooperate with me in changing clothes, and then he started crying.

When I saw him crying, I became even more angry and anxious, and couldn't help but yell at him.

In fact, when I think about it, there is no need to yell. Yelling will frighten the child and make you cry harder, making you even more angry. Afterwards, you will feel very distressed when you see the child's pitiful appearance.

1) Count one, two, three silently: Before you can’t control your emotions, start counting before you have the only remaining sanity. When you count, your brain has already started thinking.

Counting time gives you a buffer to calm down.

2) Use silence instead of yelling: Many times we yell because the children don’t listen to what we say.

But yelling is not the only way. You can try to calm down and be silent.

Children are obedient, sensible, and well-behaved not because of your yelling, but because they know their parents’ bottom line, so sometimes silence and calm refusal are more effective.

3) Appropriate remediation: No one can stop yelling at a child all at once, so you must remediate it in time after yelling at a child.

Pull yourself down and apologize to your child: Mom shouldn’t have yelled at you like that just now!

I tried to do this. When I apologized to my child, he did not blame me, but hugged me tightly while crying. You see, the child actually loves us more than we love him.

Start yelling now!