The hit drama Xiao Shede: Parents' forced love is aggravating children's psychological problems.

Tian Yulan (played by Rulu) in Xiao Shede is a typical deep education anxiety. She is not only deeply involved, but also constantly spreads her anxiety. She said, "You can only become a master if you suffer. If you love him now, you will hurt him in the future. "

However, how does the child feel?

"I don't think my mother loves me, but the one who got full marks ..." A word from my son Yan Ziyou!

In fact, there are not a few parents who receive high-pressure education like Tian Yulan.

They pin all their hopes on their children, try their best to enroll them in various cram schools and force them to learn all kinds of talents, whether they like it or not.

However, this result is often counterproductive. Not only does it not make children better, but it is easy for children to become learning tools, slowly lose interest in learning, enthusiasm for learning, and even suffer from learning phobia.

Why is this?

Because these parents often ignore their children's feelings in the name of love, kidnap their children emotionally and worry that they will take a detour, they directly graft the so-called experience on their children and make choices for them, but forget to ask them what they need. Finally, children have various problems: rebellion, weariness of learning, discord between parents and children, depression and so on.

The rice peaches in Xiaosheli come from the countryside. The family lives in a crowded rental house, but their academic performance is the first in the class.

Mi Tao's parents regard her as the only hope to take root in the city, so they have high hopes for her. Under the double pressure of family and study, Mi Tao's memory declined and his academic performance declined rapidly.

Mi Tao's parents just accused her of declining academic performance, but did not pay attention to her psychological changes, which led to Mi Tao's state getting worse and worse, and finally suffered from depression.

Therefore, parents' love with pressure is terrible for children.

In fact, children's psychological activities are different from those of adults and are very complicated.

Children themselves lack the ability to express themselves, and if they are nervous with their parents, they can't solve their psychological abnormalities. Finally, I have to show physical abnormalities, such as crying, moving around, ignoring people, often having headaches and vomiting, and fierce resistance. We can't measure children by the standards of adults.

In addition, the symptoms of children's psychological problems are different from those of adults: for depression, adults may commit suicide because of depression, but children will not; For example, symptoms such as auditory hallucinations, delusions and hallucinations caused by adult psychological problems are rarely seen in children. On the contrary, children are prone to straightforward reactions such as shrinking and crying.

When children have psychological pressure, they are often inferior to adults in emotional control. If it is not handled and controlled in time, it will cause serious psychological problems.

Therefore, parents should always reflect on whether our love for children is correct, whether our requirements for children are appropriate, whether we put too much pressure on children, and whether we give children what they want.

Parents should also communicate with their children from time to time, let them speak their minds, understand their children, care for them correctly, and let them have a healthy psychology. When you find that your child's condition is not right, such as depression, crying, insomnia, poor memory, truancy, etc., don't think that your child is too melodramatic, and you must pay enough attention to it. If these situations are not alleviated for a long time, you must seek professional help in time!

Reflecting on the mental health problems in Xiao Shede, have you neglected the children's mental health?