How to chat with girls

To tell the truth, chatting with girls really doesn't have that many profound skills. Here are some suggestions:

When you see a girl-say hello-communicate further-the answer is embedded in yourself-you need to get the contact information.

1, see girls say hello. "Hi, hello, I want to know you."

Too many boys are stuck in this first step, psychologically afraid, timid and inferior, and don't know what to say. As for the problem of mentality, remember that only once you succeed can you solve the problem of mentality greatly. You can start with the simplest girl. Even if you don't want to chase her, you can simply make friends and succeed first! Very important!

Secondly, how to say hello?

In fact, the simplest word is "hi", smile, stand upright, nod, extend your right hand, look at each other politely, say "hi" and give each other a signal of hello. In fact, it is as simple as that, and so is the host.

After that, you really need skills. Should I just say "I want to know you"? Or do you use some third-party topics to indirectly establish contact?

In fact, when I first wanted to chase girls, I learned a trick called "Let girls help you a little". For example, if you eat in the school cafeteria, you deliberately ask this girl to brush a meal card for you. Then establish contact and know everything.

There is also a common joke: "Hello, classmate, my mobile phone is dead, and it's urgent. Can I borrow your mobile phone to make a phone call? " Then call yourself. "Of course, as a personal item like a mobile phone, in fact, if you are not a good-hearted person, it will be a bit difficult to borrow a mobile phone.

In fact, this is an "indirect chat-up". Through some excuses and reasons, establish contact with girls and form a conversation. On the contrary, directly saying that you want to know each other is "going straight."

In the real scene, no matter whether you strike up a conversation directly or indirectly, the difference is not big, because basically a girl with a little brain can know what you want to do, as long as the reason for choosing an indirect conversation is not too outrageous.

However, one factor has a great influence on whether you use "direct chat up" or "indirect chat up".

Is "can girls leave at any time", that is, when you strike up a conversation, if a girl refuses you, is it easy to stay away from you?

Girls are dynamic and easy to walk away, such as shopping malls and streets. Either directly or indirectly.

Girls are static, in a fixed position, and it is not easy to leave. Such as: in the cafe, next to the high-speed rail seat. It is best to strike up a conversation indirectly and take care of each other's feelings.

Because, in a static state, if you want to know each other, after the other party refuses, you have to be in a very intimate scene, which will form an embarrassing scene.

At the earliest, I also summarized some topics of indirect conversation. Now it seems to be actually a chat skill, to find a reasonable topic, an excuse, or to provide value and ask for help, that's all.

2. Further communication. "Expose your information+describe your current state and feelings"

Some friends, after the woman stopped to agree, said "OK". I don't know what to say, so there is ice below.

In fact, you just stopped each other at present. On the whole, the other party is not too much of a threat, but she is still in a state of confusion and alert, and she doesn't know who you are or what your real purpose is.

Therefore, at this time, you need to enhance the other party's "sense of security" and "trust" in you in a short time.

In fact, the most effective way is to keep sincere thoughts, expose your own information (the more you expose yourself, the more information you let the other party know, and the safer the other party will feel), and make clear your state and feelings at that time.

For example:

Hello, this is xxx. What do I do in the nearby company (expose my basic information)? I just went out with my friends to prepare for dinner, and then I saw your posture (current state), and I felt that you were beautiful and elegant. So I came to meet you. I hope I didn't scare you. (feelings+thoughts)

The answer is embedded in yourself. "I am in XXX, and XXXX)

After further communication, after that, because the conversation is interactive, there must be questions and answers.

Ask questions:

Remember, only ask the easiest questions, the current small questions and the general questions. For example: Where are you going? Which way are you going? The latter is more vague, more general and easier to answer than the former. For example: What do you do? Well, what do you do? This is more general, easier to answer and more secure.

Answer:

Because to avoid asking questions continuously, you need to ask questions+her answer+your answer+your question/her answer.

So this answer mainly means that after you ask questions and the girls answer, you should not ask questions, but answer them.

This answer is the girl's answer after she finishes one thing and answers a question she is interested in. You should connect yourself with the key points according to the contents of the woman's reply, so that girls can feel that you and one of her friends are the same as the people they have seen before, and have a sense of deja vu.

For example, the girl replied that she didn't come often, so she just wandered around xx Square on the other side of Xicheng. You can answer, xx Square in Xicheng, you know, the famous and interesting story that you have experienced, makes you relate to each other's past and embed it.

4. Get contact information. "There is no fixed standard, but the average girl is willing to spend three or five minutes and listen to you."

Generally speaking, if things go well, after simple further communication and a few words, we can talk for about three to five minutes.

Then, as long as the girl doesn't leave and she is here, even if she doesn't talk much, she is willing to listen to you for three or five minutes and devote her time to you, then the probability of being exposed to information will be much greater.

Of course, this is not a dead standard. Some girls may be anxious, while others may be introverted. They are very happy and willing to give you contact information, but they don't want to chat in this scene.

Just as a basis for judgment, the more girls are willing to spend more time with you, the greater the chance.

5. Say hello and explain that the idea you want to know is not directly accepted by the other party.

A. The woman directly refuses or walks away.

Then give up, don't be bored and give people trouble.

B, the girl's expression is dull, ask why. Why do you want to know me?

The emphasis is direct, firm, concise and conceptual. You just want to get to know her and be friends with her if possible.

Don't hesitate to talk indirectly about a bunch of current scenes and feelings.

C, the girl smiled and asked, why do you want to know me?

The point at this time is that girls are an emotional need, so you just have to follow the current process and express it. Where did you say you met her? How do you feel about her? You want to know her. Not bad.

6. Two common situations in the process of chatting up.

Silence, no topic:

Because some friends can really say a few words, which is already very good. The longer I know each other, the better, but I'm really not good at chatting and my mentality is not natural enough. What should I do if I don't know what to say?

The answer is: go with girls. Ask her which way to go, and then you can talk as you walk.

Because action can reduce the perception of dialogue time gap. Moreover, in the process of walking, you will get new information and generate new topics.

Have a nice chat:

Sometimes after chatting up, in fact, girls are willing to talk to you for three to five minutes when they have nothing to do. And you can obviously feel that you are comfortable talking, there is no pressure, and the other party is quite happy.

Then grasping each other's emotional points at this time can promote the transformation of a timely date. What about the date? It's simple. Find a coffee shop or something, sit down and have a drink, and the short communication will take about 10 minutes.

Have some coffee and drinks. This money should be spent.

Supplement on the level of psychological principles

1, when you meet a girl in the street, you should strike up a conversation in the girl's direction.

Psychologically speaking, people's front and right front are the main control areas of self-awareness and the alert side. Therefore, in this area, I am in control and feel more secure. Behind people is an unsafe area.

Therefore, when we strike up a conversation, we usually walk in front of each other and greet each other with a certain vision and space in the square.

And if we chase it from behind, it's also on the right, trotting to the front of the right as much as possible, and then stopping, paying attention to the palm down and extending the right hand, so there is no threat to stop.

Never shoot girls from behind, it's easy to scare girls.

2. Safe distance, about1~1.5m. ..

There is a safe distance between people. For example, when taking the elevator, we will obviously get too close to strangers, which will make us feel a little insecure.

Therefore, as a stranger, greeting girls should not be too intimate, otherwise it will violate the core territorial status of girls. On the right front, 1~ 1.5 meters is a good position (in fact, it is a strange distance to exceed 1.2 meters, which probably does not have much impact within this range. )

3. Use interrogative sentences as little as possible and use declarative sentences as much as possible.

Interrogative questions always ask for information from the other party, and at the same time give people a sense of insecurity. This situation also exists in daily chat. You don't need to ask questions to get information. Try to use declarative sentences.

For example, if you see a girl wandering in the same place alone at the gate of a shopping mall, basically either the appointment person is slow, or the taxi doesn't arrive, or the person who picks him up doesn't arrive. Anyway, the probability of waiting for someone is very high.

Don't ask, are you waiting for someone? To put it bluntly, it seems that someone is late.

Compared with me, girls will be more interested in the second statement, men with positive tone.

Experience yourself

Don't lack confidence. If you lack self-confidence, you can't ask girls out to meet. Lack of self-confidence is not good for you, and it may ruin your chances of falling in love, because many girls find men with lack of self-confidence unattractive, and I know it myself.

I'm talking about a topic that both sides find interesting.

I said to myself, attach importance to the process and despise the result. Can't control the results, so look down on the results and focus on what you can control.